AN: This is just a little story I wrote a long time ago and forgot about. I've decided to try publishing it for the hell of it…I'll add chapter 2 if I get, say, five positive reviews. (why continue if everyone hates it?) Hope you enjoy =)

Tweek Tweak stared at the building in front of him, unsure if he was nervous or not.

Park County High School wasn't all that menacing, despite its graffiti and metal detectors. The surprisingly large size of it didn't faze him either- his old school in Denver had been bigger. No, the real fear factor was the unshakeable "new kid" aura hovering around him, marking him for the others to stare at.

This wouldn't be so troubling to him if it weren't for his constant paranoia. Tweek's eye twitched and he resisted the urge to let out a "GAH!" There was no doubt he would later, of course; Tweek was known back in Denver for his twitchy, slightly psycho demeanor due in part to his frequent coffee intake. In the city he was loved for it- his spasms made girls giggle and guys ruffle his already unruly hair in endearment. In this hick town, though? He had no idea what was in store for him.

Sipping his coffee, Tweek looked down at his schedule and checked to see if the map he had of the school was marked correctly. He'd had his mother circle each of his classes in red marker and draw sloppy arrows in the directions he'd have to travel. Childish? Perhaps. Necessary? Hell yeah.

His family had come to South Park because his dad had been hired as the manager of its new Harbucks Coffee. Hopefully the townies drank a lot of caffeine; Tweek had hated when his dad ran the small, relatively unsuccessful Tweak's Coffee. Tweek had only been a little kid at the time it closed, but the road to its closing was poor and embarrassing. Even as a kindergartener he understood that his twitchiness was less weird than his ugly hand-me-down clothes.

A bell tang loudly, and Tweek spat out his mouthful of coffee in uncomfortable surprise, shrieking all the way. A couple of Goth kids on the stairs snorted at him, but the other kids milling around barely gave him a second glance. Relieved at the lack of teasing, Tweek shook his messy blonde hair a little to regain his composure, blinked a few times, then hurried into the school to begin his first day as a junior.


"Hey, I'm Clyde."

Tweek spazzed a little at the introduction, having been given no warning. He calmed himself down quickly- he had taken several pills that morning- and turned to his left to see a brunette sliding into the desk next to his. He was dressed in a red letterman jacket and blue jeans, nothing special. "Tweek," Tweek answered.

"What?" Clyde's nose wrinkled in confusion.

"It's my name," Tweek said, feeling a tinge of embarrassment as his right eye twitched. "Tweek Tweak."

"Oh," Clyde responded. "Sorry."

A dark-skinned kid sat in front of him, turning to Clyde with a grin. "First period together, brother," he said happily, punching his friend in the arm.

"Yeah!" was the enthusiastic response. "Token, this is Tweek. Tweek, Token. My best friend."

Tweek resisted the urge to roll his eyes, simply letting his teeth clatter for a moment. And Clyde had thought his name was a joke. "Nice to meet you," he said politely.

"You too," Token said with a friendly nod. At least people didn't seem to be assholes to new people; that was a plus. "I haven't seen you before."

Shifting in his seat uncomfortably at the thought of the hidden cameras that could be all over the classroom, Tweek said, "I just moved here. From Denver."

Token and Clyde shared a laugh. "Denver?" Clyde asked. "Seriously?"

"You can tell us stories about where it's normal," Token joked. "Why would you want to move from somewhere like Denver to a shitty town like South Park?"

"My dad's the new- GAH- manager of Harbucks," Tweek said with a jolt.

"It's opening again?" Token asked excitedly. "Fuck, I've been waiting for that. McDonald's coffee just plain old sucks." Token paused. "By the way, are you okay, Tweek? You keep kind of, like, twitching."

Clyde tried to shush his friend, blushing, but Tweek answered. "It's fine," he told Clyde. "I've got ADD, but I'm also kind of a coffee addict. My dad's been giving it to me since I was a really little kid."

"Whoa," Clyde breathed.

Tweek shuddered involuntarily, giving no more response.

Apparently choosing to change the subject, Token commented, "Craig's not in this class."

"Yeah," Clyde said, looking around the room. "Or he is, and he's skipping."

"Either way," Token said, "I'm not bothered. A break from Craig is fine with me anytime."

"Who's Craig?" Tweek asked.

"A friend of ours," Clyde began, but the bell rang and the teacher entered.

"Welcome to pre-calculus," the teacher, Mr. Mower, began in a dreary monotone.

Shit, Tweek thought with another twitchy spasm. Math already sucks.

On the upside, he mused, he had two new friends already.


Token and Clyde kept walking with Tweek after the class had ended, comparing all of their schedules. "So we all have first and third period together, and seventh period, but that doesn't really count because it's gym," Clyde observed.

"And you and I have sixth," Token said to him. "Tweek, we have fifth period together. And you have fourth with Clyde."

Tweek shook uncontrollably for a minute before taking a sip of coffee he'd gotten from his locker. "Lunch?" he asked.

"Yeah, it's all of us. And Jimmy will be there too. And maybe Craig, I guess, but he's been sneaking off campus for lunch since freshman year."

Token snorted. "He thinks he's really cool, but since Clyde, Jimmy, and I were always best friends with him, we can remember how he used to be in middle school."

"Or worse," Clyde chuckled, "elementary."

"Especially on the days when he wears his hat." The two boys started laughing together, leaving Tweek to drink his coffee nervously. He tried not to let himself get scared and start thinking they were laughing at him but, ugh, what if they were?

Tweek looked around, beginning to blush. Other kids were looking at them; Token and Clyde were mentioning even more comical characteristics of their friend Craig and laughing harder and harder, frightening Tweek. He nervously looked down at his grey and white striped American Eagle hoodie and pictured a huge, tan coffee stain in the middle of it. "Ha," He imagined someone saying, "that new kid spilt coffee all over himself!"

Even though it was all in his head, Tweek soon let out a "GAH!" of embarrassment at everyone laughing at him. Token and Clyde stopped their laughter at once. "Sorry, dude," Token whispered soothingly. He was starting to understand Tweek. "This is your next class anyway, man, we'll see you in an hour for English." Token patted Tweek on the shoulder nicely before continuing on with Clyde.

Since Tweek's second period social studies class was so far away from precalc, he stepped into the room with a minute to spare. There were only a couple of seats left, and he opted for the one next to a guy in a blue Abercrombie polo and a bright green bomber hat. As the late bell rang, the kid flashed a pearly smile and held out his hand, saying, "I'm Kyle- you must be Tweek?"

"How do you know me?" Tweek asked warily, eyeing Kyle's hand in wide-eyed terror.

"Token texted me saying we had a new kid, and that you'd be in my class," Kyle explained gently. Apparently Token had mentioned Tweek's tendency to go slightly nuts, too.

Anyway, he was satisfied with this explanation, and tentatively stretched out his arm to Kyle, allowing his hand to be shaken. "Nice to meet you," Tweek said politely. He looked around. "Where is the teacher?"

"Sleeping," Kyle pointed out. Tweek followed his gaze to the corner of the room where the teacher's desk was and, indeed, an old lady had fallen into a doze with a white pillow supporting her head. "This school is a joke," Kyle said cheerfully. "Anyway, I-"

His sentence was interrupted by the entrance of a tall, stocky kid, also in a red letterman's jacket. He had brown hair like Clyde, but his was messier, and he was overall more muscular. He entered the classroom lazily, swaggering over to Kyle and tossing a blonde kid out of the seat in front of him. "Sieg heil!" he said obnoxiously.

"Shut up fatass!" Kyle said, his cheeks turning slightly pink. "Butters, are you okay?"

"Uh huh," mumbled the startled Butters, who collected his books and hurried to another seat.

"I'm not even fat anymore," the guy said, sitting down in the newly vacated seat. Tweek noted the surname "Cartman" on the back of his jacket.

"Doesn't matter," Kyle retorted, "you're just as much of a pig as you ever were."

Cartman rolled his eyes. "Why, because I stole your girlfriend?"

"Bebe wasn't my girlfriend…?"

"You wanted her to be," Cartman said, appearing annoyed. "That fucker Clyde has her now, though, so whatever."

Kyle's face went completely red. A guilty look flashed across Cartman's face, but it passed, and he turned to Tweek. "Who the hell are you?" he asked loudly.

"That's impolite," Kyle was quick to point out. Tweek twitched a few times.

Cartman stared at Tweek, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Kyle, shut the hell up. Are you okay?" he addressed Tweek again. "Look, Kyle, he's like, jumping…"

"It's the coffee," Tweek whispered.

"…How much do you drink?"

"About six cups so far. Today, anyway."

"Dude!" Cartman exclaimed. "What the hell is wrong with your parents?"

"You don't just insult people's parents, Cartman!" Kyle yelled.

"Oh yeah? 'Cause I call yours dirty Jews all the time."

"You asshole!"

"Fucking Jew!"


Tweek shuddered and ducked his head under his arms with this, quivering. Kyle and Cartman abruptly stopped yelling, staring at Tweek instead. "Sorry," they whispered in unison.


The rest of Tweek's first day went smoothly. In the lunch line he also met another football player, Stan, and his girlfriend, Wendy, who introduced him to Kenny, a blonde in a fur-lined orange parka. They were all friendly- Tweek especially liked Kenny- but when Clyde and Token showed up and caught him talking to his new buddies, they yelled and dragged him away.

The classes were okay- the English teacher talked too much, and the gym teacher chose to yell everything he said, but otherwise okay- and even strangers seemed friendly, allowing him to the front of the coffee line when he explained his twitchy nature. It wasn't until the end of the day that Tweek hit a sort of rough patch.

He was walking to his car in the parking lot past the bike racks when he heard yelling. Tweek turned to see a black-haired boy in a band tee holding a terrified freshman up to the wall by the collar of his shirt. Other people had stopped to watch, and Tweek joined them slowly, a feeling of foreboding in his stomach.

"You little fucker," the kid with the jet black hair snarled. "You don't mouth off to me."

"I'm s-s-sorry," the poor kid stuttered, reminding Tweek of himself. He twitched at this thought.

"You better fucking be," growled his tormentor. "Because I can make your life hell, and I WILL make your life hell." He dropped the underclassman and watched him scamper away in terror. A cruel smirk crossed his face as the crowd slowly filtered away. Tweek moved to the front of the few people remaining, and as the jerk turned, his eyes met Tweek's. He sauntered over and stood face-to-face with him. "I'm kind of a hardass," he said, looking down his nose.

Tweek snorted. "You've got an awful temper," he said with a frown. What a showoff.

The small crowd gasped, but the dark-haired boy smiled slightly. "I guess you could say that." He turned and walked off in the direction of the parking lot.

"And that," said Clyde, appearing suddenly and throwing his arm over Tweek's shoulder, "was Craig."