He knew he shouldn't be here, but after all the running he had been doing he always ended up here; at her doorstep of all places. It was a wonder she hadn't found him already in the few weeks he's been gone with as many times as he's ended up at her place. It was four in the morning and she was undoubtedly asleep, completely ignorant to his presence. He knew he would just keep coming back, unless he could see for himself that she was indeed, alright. So he deftly picked her lock with the ease and silence of an expert with his caliber and entered her dark apartment. Everything was dark and it took a moment for his eyes to adjust as he shut the door quietly behind him. When they did he noticed that the place looked virtually empty as if it hadn't been lived in for weeks. He frowned and paused in her living room. Her place was cold and after swiping a finger over her coffee table, very dusty. Moving through her place he took note of other things; an empty kitchen with no dishes out and a collection of three tall whiskey bottles, empty on the kitchen island. When he finally made it to her room, he half expected her not to be there but she was.
She was curled up on top of her blankets and was murmuring in her sleep. Stepping closer, he kneeled before her and watched in fascination as her eyes flickered beneath her eyelids and her lips moved almost inperceptively in incoherent words. Her brow furrowed and her body jerked in her sleep as she called out his name. The pain and emotion in which she cried out with made his stomach drop and his face pale. Had he read her wrong? His leaving was only supposed to effect her job, nothing else. It was knowing that that made it easier for him to leave; knowing she wouldn't care. Olivia Dunham would tough it out and be back to normal in a day – tops. But the proof to the contrary was undeniable and right in front of him. She called out again in her sleep and thrashed out with her legs, barely missing him. Before he could stop himself, he began to smooth the hair back from her face and cooed to her.
"Shhh, Livia, everything is okay," He murmured to her, brushing his palm against the smooth skin of her cheek. Her eyes fluttered open before he could escape and she took in his presence with a tired confusion.
"Peter?" She rasped.
Peter was struck into silence and before she could answer she closed her eyes.
"I'm only dreaming again, aren't I…" Olivia sighed and rolled over so that she stared up at the ceiling.
He stayed silent for a minute, taking all of her in. The dark bags under her eyes and the waxy like complexion of her skin. She had clearly been crying recently as well.
"Livia, why are you so sad?' Peter asked.
She snorted and rolled back to face him. "Why do you think? You left, Peter. Never even said goodbye. After all we'd been through – I thought we were friends." She sighed and finally met his eyes. "I guess I understand on some level though. I'd be pissed at me too."
"Why would I be upset with you?" Peter asked.
"Wait – so dream-me thinks you don't know that I betrayed your trust? That I might as well have pushed you out that preverbal door that is my life?" Olivia shook her head tiredly. "Maybe I ought to take up SoCo instead of the whiskey…"
"Olivia!" Peter said, shocked at her decision to drown herself in alcohol.
"I knew, Peter. I knew he had taken you but I was too God damned selfish to say anything because I didn't want you to run out of my life and now you are gone and I didn't have a chance to apologize." Olivia's confession spilled from her mouth in a rush of emotion and feeling before she could think about it.
Peter almost fell back in shock and actually sank lower to the ground when what she said finally weighed in. She had seen him glimmer. That had to be it.
"And the scary part is, is that I'm glad Walter stole you from the other side. If he hadn't, you would've died and if he had returned you I wouldn't have met you." Olivia sobbed. "I know that makes me a horrible person, but I just can't imagine working these insane cases without you and – and-" She sobbed again and even as shell shocked as Peter was he palmed her face and gently stroked her hair back.
"Olivia, it's okay…" He started, but she was quick to interrupt.
"No! No it isn't. I'm so sorry, Peter. I should've told you." She turned and buried her face into her pillow and cried her tears out.
"Livia, I forgive you." Peter said softly. Her crying ceased and she turned to look at him.
"I don't deserve your forgiveness. I betrayed you, Peter." She was fighting tears again, but Peter shook his head and leaned forward to kiss her forehead.
"You've beaten yourself up enough over this. Olivia, I want you to be happy and forget okay?" Peter was getting choked up and had to clear his throat a bit so he could maintain his calm façade.
"That's just it – I don't think I can be happy without you." Olivia said.
Tears slipped past Peter's defense and down his cheeks as he regarded the woman he had fallen in love with. He swiped at them in frustration at his weakness.
"Could you stay and hold me?" Olivia asked, voice shaking in sadness. "I know, in this dream you normally leave and never look back, but I-" Her voice broke and she had to steal some strength from deep down to keep going. "I really miss you."
Peter choked on a sob and nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that." Removing his jacket and shoes he moved to the other side of the bed and lifted the blankets so they could both ease under. She turned toward him and he pulled her body into his and held her as closely as he could. "Livia, I'm sorry I left." He murmured into her hair.
"Shhh, you'll only be gone in the morning when I wake up from this dream. Please don't make it harder for me to wake up," she pleaded in a soft voice.
Peter squeezed her and stayed quiet. He held her until she had fallen asleep again and when he thought about getting up and leaving he decided that he couldn't. He too was tired to the core and a short nap wouldn't kill him. Besides, he was at peace with Olivia in his arms. With that last thought he drifted off into a deep slumber.
Olivia woke feeling a little more refreshed than normal and turned to glance at her clock. 9:00AM. Sighing, she sat up and let the blanket slip from her body and she stretched her aching body. Her mind strayed to the dream she had had and how it had felt so real at the time. She flopped back into bed and stared up at the ceiling, letting her mind wander over how much she missed Peter. His arms had felt so real wrapped around her and his scent had soothed her so easily. Turning, Olivia buried her face in the pillow beside her and inhaled a calming breath, but it caught in her throat when she realized that his scent was on the pillow. Olivia shot out of bed and began running around her apartment.
"Peter?" She called, turning each corner with no awareness other than that she had to find him. "PETER?" She shouted again and realized that she had checked every room and there was no trace of him. Collapsing to her knees she gave in and cried. He'd left again.
Pulling herself up from her hard floor, Olivia moved to her front door to be sure it was locked and that's when she saw a white slip of paper taped to the door with her name on it. She hastily tore the paper from the door and flipped it over, her hands shaking from nerves. It read:
Olivia, I forgive you.
A/N: Because I couldn't help myself and sleep wouldn't come once this popped into my head. Thanks for reading!