Stay With Me
Chapter Thirty-Nine: Forever
"This is why you wouldn't let me come over?" She asked; her voice hoarse with un-fallen tears as she pulled my shirt tightly around herself and crossed her arms over her chest. "And why I couldn't see you otherwise – you were working on this?"
"Yes," I whispered as I stepped up behind her and wrapped my arms around her shoulders and pulled her back into my chest and kissed the top of her head. "Jacob helped me, but I didn't want you to see anything before it was done. I wanted to see you so badly everyday, but I knew every moment I went to see you was another moment I could be working on our house, and that meant it had to be that much longer before I could have you again. Really have you, and not just for an hour or two.
"That time I went to see you - when you were sleeping in your Dad's room– I just couldn't force myself to stay away from you any longer. I had to see you, I just had to. I had to have you in my arms again, and I didn't care about anything else – just you. I know it meant that it made a few hours difference in the completion of the house, but seeing you there, sleeping so peacefully and feeling that peacefulness and comfort when I held you in my arms, and how much more your body relaxed when I was there… it was worth everything."
"I wish you had woken me." She said as she wrapped her little hands tightly around my forearms.
"No," I told her as I pulled her closer. "No, I'm glad I didn't. I love holding you. I love your eyes, but when I'm holding you when you're sleeping… When people are sleeping they are so vulnerable. Sleep is such an intimate time for a person – and though I know it in other moments, like now – when you are sleeping I know how much you trust me, how much faith you have in me to protect you and cherish you. You're breaths are slower; more controlled and rhythmic, and your heart beats perfectly, never fluctuating or declining. Always the same, it's unwavering and unchanging… just like my love for you. Only my love grows everyday."
"Oh, Sam," She sighed as she leaned her head further back onto my chest, and I looked down to see a small smile on her lips and her eyes closed. "Why is it that you're always so much better at expressing yourself than I am?"
I laughed softly before hugging her tighter. "I'm not better at expressing myself Bella, I just tell you what is going through my mind the moment I think of it." I told her as I bent down to kiss her forehead. "If anything you're better at it, all it takes for you to get a point across is a look – I still have to use words."
"Yeah, well my look versus your words is nothing. You've made me fall head-over-heels for you so many times now I can feel myself turning into a contortionist. And besides," She added as she spun herself around to face me. "I'm not the only one who has a-thousand-word-eyes." She said as she ran her hand up the side of my face and into my hair, "Up in your bedroom-"
"Our bedroom," I corrected her as I closed my eyes and leaned into her touch.
"Up in our bedroom," She repeated as she let out a shaky breath and gently dug her nails against my scalp. "In our bedroom… The way you looked at me – you made everything else disappear. The bed, the walls, the wind, even the carpet we stood on just turned into nothing."
"Why?" I asked her as I looked down at her and cupped my hand around the back of her neck.
"Because," She said slowly. "Because I love you – and all I could feel, all I could see in that moment – was us. It was like what everybody says about dying, how your life flashes before your eyes. Only it wasn't dying, but so much more – it was living. I saw every moment we have ever had together – weather it be good or bad, I saw it all. I felt it all. Before we were together, when I wanted to be with you so badly it hurt… the first time you told me you loved me, the first time you held me in your arms – kissed me… it's all I could feel. It's all I could see; I was just blind to everything else entirely. There was no one else – no sound, no sight, no feeling. Just you and me, just us, and just this." She told me as she took her free hand and placed it against my chest over my heart. "Beating – and living as one."
"No," I told her after a moment as I slid my hand away from her neck to place it over hers – over my heart. She pulled her eyebrows in together and looked up at me, opening her mouth to speak I placed my hand over her lips and whispered. "You're not good at expressing your emotions verbally at all. You're amazing…" As I slid my hand away from her mouth I ran my thumb over her lips, and as she closed her eyes she kissed it softly. She slid her hand away from my chest and held my hand to her lips, moving it up and over, over and up and inch by inch kissing every part of it. After her lips had explored the territory of my hand she slowly made her way to my wrist and from my wrist to my forearm. As her lips traveled higher up my arm I wrapped it around her head to hug her closer, being unable to keep myself at any distance – however small - from her.
I watched with adoration and love as she made her way along my arm, until I could no longer take looking at her without kissing her myself as she finished with my arm and began kissing her way along my shoulder and chest. I just closed my eyes and drank in every caress of her lips against my skin and hugged her closer and closer. Her lips began massaging along my neck, and stopped just at the base of my jawbone where she placed her hand over my heart once more and rested her head against my chest. I then pulled her free hand to my lips and began kissing her in return, starting at the tips of her fingers and working my way inward.
I know I imprinted on her, but how I had lived my life without her before is something I will never know or understand. Never be able to grasp or come close to comprehending. Once I began living a life with her in it… there was no other life for me. Only her. Only us…
As I pulled my lips from her neck I opened my eyes and looked down at her; eyes closed and cradled safely in my arms.
AN: To say I grew attached to this story… it doesn't even begin to describe the depth of those words. This was – and is – by far my favorite story I have ever written on Fanfiction. And my long delays of updating… I know, while suspenseful for you all, was agony for me. I knew what those delays meant, and those delays were there only for the sole purpose that I knew the end of the story was near – and honestly (pathetically) it depressed me. I love this story. It meant a lot to me to be able to share my imagination with you all in Stay With Me. Thank you all for your wonderful and kind reviews, they truly meant a lot to me.
And while this story has come to a close, I am sure some of you are going to wonder (and ask) if I am going to have a sequel for it. And the answer to this is… no. I am sorry, but to me, in my mind, this story is perfect just the way it is. And adding a sequel would just ruin, what I would call, a perfect love story - With a few bumps, sad moments, and painful twists.
But hey, what love story doesn't?
And I know that most of you were probably looking forward to the wedding- originally, that was going to be the last chapter. And I tell you, I don't know how many times I tried to write it, but just couldn't! And as I was getting close to completing the end of this chapter, it was so obvious why! There was never meant to be a wedding chapter – but a chapter that explained their forever, instead. And this is it.
Keep an eye on my profile for more Sam / Bella stories. And though I am not the original author of the first chapter of Green Light (Random Person In ur Bushes) I will be working on, and posting that soon! And because I am not the originator of that story I do like to run idea's I get for it by Randi first, and without giving anything away I've got a few idea's cooking (and already run-by) in the ole noggin. But until then, see ya.