I had to do this. I had to. Buford's my second favorite character, and he definitely doesn't get too much love in the fan community. This takes place about 5 years from the series, which would make him and the others my age. Reason is, I wanna draw them as teens. So bad. Humor me.

Fear Number one: Gingers

The day had come when the ninth grade speech class had to write about their biggest fear. Our group was sitting around, practicing reading them to each other.

"Oh…" Phineas's eyes opened wide. "WOW, Ferb. You seriously wrote that… for class?"

A nod.

"Well… It IS pretty scary. But do you think they'll let you read that… y'know. In school?"

Another nod.

Isabella shivered. "I can see being afraid of it. But how did you even come up with that?"

"Silent Hill," answered Ferb matter-of-factly, as if those two words answered all.

Phineas nodded, apparently reading his brother's previous response. "Okay. That explains it. Your turn, Buford."

Buford winced. He had been dreading this from the start. He tried to make up excuses not to read, but even that had only delayed him to going last.

His fear was humiliating. A tough guy like him had a rep to look after, certain appearances to keep up. If anyone found out, Buford would be ruined.

But the worst part?

They could be watching.

Buford gulped, making his way to the front. His eyes travelled nervously across the small crowd before him. First to Baljeet, a curious, almost sly grin across his tan face. To Ferb, eyeing him with the same intense, emotionless stare as always. To Phineas, eagerly looking up, and lastly, Isabella, just as eagerly looking at Phineas. Buford blinked away, unable to take it any longer.

"Uh… Okay…" He stammered. "My speech is on… on… It's…"

Baljeet, Phineas, and Isabella leaned further in, intrigued. Ferb stayed the same, yet raised one eyebrow questioningly.

"I… The… Y'see…. It…"

"Come on, Buford! Spit it out!"

"Uh… I, uh…"


Buford finally broke. "Okay, okay!" he blurted. "The thing I fear most is…" Buford looked around nervously, then continued. "…gingers."

Phineas raised an eyebrow. "What's a ginger?"

"You mean my old friend from Fireside Girls?" asked Isabella.

"A tuber that is consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice," stated Ferb monotonously.

Buford sighed. "No! A ginger is someone with red hair, pale skin, and freckles!"


"So what?"

"So why are you afraid of them?" asked Phineas.

"WHY?!" gasped Buford. "They HAVE NO SOULS!!"

"That's not nice to say," said Isabella, frowning.

"It doesn't matter if it's nice!! It's TRUE!!"

"Well…" said Phineas. "I have red hair."

Buford sighed. They obviously didn't get it. "Then you're a Daywalker! You have red hair but no pale skin or freckles."

"I kind of have freckles."

"Yeah, Buford," said Isabella. "Phineas has some freckles."

"But no pale skin!"

"I guess…" Phineas glanced at his brother, then back to Buford. "I'm not as tan as Ferb though. Or Baljeet. Or-"

"You're NOT a ginger, okay?!" Buford face-palmed. "You're not!"

"How can you tell, though?"

"Do you have a soul?" asked Buford, calmly.

"I… think so."

Ferb placed a hand on Phineas's head lovingly. "Definitely."


Ferb glared at Buford. "Are you yelling at my brother?"

"Only because he…" He drifted off, remembering the time back in fourth grade when Ferb paralyzed Buford completely just by pinching a pressure point on his neck. "Uh, no. No I wasn't."

Ferb nodded, as if to say 'That's what I thought'.

Buford's SECOND greatest fear.

Ferb Thomas Fletcher. Age 15.

End of first chapter. This shall be fun.

By the way, the reason that Baljeet was being so quiet was because he was having too much fun just watching.

Note: This author has nothing against gingers. It was based on something else. If you are a ginger, please do not be offended, because he really means nothing by it, and why am I talking in third person?