Look! I'm not dead yet! And I won't be anytime soon! Oh look, I'll go take a walk now...aaannnnddd, I think at this point, there should be a limit as to how many 'Holy Grail' jokes I can do, but I think not. Bwahahaha...ha.
Step 5: When trying to pull off an 'Ocean's Eleven', it always works best if you actually have eleven people, just saying.
Marik: I'm bored, let's go rob the casino
Bakura: (flipping through channels) What?
Marik: I said, let's go rob the casino, like that one movie with George Clooney and What's-his-face
Bakura: "Ocean's Eleven'?
Marik: That's the one
Bakura: And why would I want to?
Marik: 'Cuz, the place is loaded! Loaded I tell you and that's not a phrase I use often!
Bakura: 'K, fine.
Bakura: and no more Mountain Dew for you.
Marik: Screw you! I'll have my Dew and you'll like it!
(About half an hour later, they find themselves in the air duct above the inside of a massive safe. Marik is wearing what looks like a rappelling harness)
Marik: This chafes, by the way. I feel like a bondage slave. Why aren't you doing it?
Bakura: Because, you're so much lighter than me
Marik: you're saying that just to get out of it, aren't you?
Bakura: There is a distinct possibility...
Marik: Curse you.
(Bakura lifts off the vent and begins to lower Marik down using a cord hooked to the harness)
Bakura: You're really heavy. You should lose some weight.
Marik: Would it kill you to say something nice or once?
Bakura: Every time I do, a puppy dies.
Marik: I thought that was when Kaiba does it. And maybe we should stop with the breaking the fourth wall. We've done it plenty of times in this fic.
Bakura: Screw the Fourth Wall! I have LK!
Marik: Uh, yeah. Let's not and say we did.
Marik: What is it—Aaaaaahhhhhhh!
Bakura:(holding the broken cable) I think the rope broke
Marik: I think I broke my noth
Marik: My NOTH you moron! My noth!
Bakura: This is just way too easy... What!
Marik: Thcrew you. Juth lifth me up already
Alarm System goes of in the room
Marik: Aw Thon of a Gun! Lifth me up! Lifth me up!
Bakura: The rope's broken, remember? And will you stop bleeding everywhere! They can get your DNA that way and find us!
Marik: You watcth waaaay too many crime thowths by the way
Bakura: Only to figure out now to get away with stuff. Throw your end of the rope and I'll pull that
(Marik does it and Bakura pulls him up. On the way up, Bakura 'accidentally' bangs Marik's head on the ceiling)
Marik: OOWWW! I already inthured you moron! Do you want me to have a concuthion too!
Bakura: Do you want the answer to that?
(Bakura pulls him through and the crawl out of the hotel, to their car. And yes, it's back by now)
Marik: Whath now?
(They drive off and they find themselves in a bad part of town)
Marik: Um, Bakura?
Marik: I lefth my hairdryer ath the room.
Bakura: Quit moaning pansy. Crap, the red light district
Marik: Whath the 'red lighth dithricth' (translated: what's the red light district?). And why ith it called thath! I mean, thith place doethn'th have more red lighths than other parths of town.
Bakura: I means that they're prostitutes here
Marik: Ooohhhhh. Tho then we'll find thomeone like Vivian Wong here?
Marik: Oooh look over there! We could athk her directionth!
Bakura: do you not know the meaning of the phrase 'prostitutes'?
Marik: Mith! Mith! We need directionth!
Chick: hey, you boys asking for something?
Marik: Yeth, we need-
Chick: Freeze!(Pulls out handgun) This is LVPD Vice!
Bakura: Holy son of Ra! She has a gun!
Marik: Who knew thath your voith could go tho high?
Chick: Get ouy of the car, now!
Bakura: Do it!
Marik: Buth I didn't do anything! IIIEEEEEEEE! ( Gets Tasered, that's what the second time now?)
(twenty minutes, they're at the police station on charges of solicitation)
Bakura: Well, this just plain sucks. Remind me to never take a roadtrip with you again
Marik: It wathn't my fault! Thhe juth Tathered me! And by the way, I thtill wanth to go back and get my dryer—OW! Thtop hitting me, Bakura!
Man, Marik never catches a break in these, does he? And that, my fellow fans, is the end of the 'Roadtrip' episodes. Just follow those steps, and you'll have a normally disaster-free trip. Actually now that I think about it, the only way you can guarantee a disaster-free trip is if you don't bring Yami Bakura or Marik with you, but then what would the fun be in that.
PS: I intended to misspell those words, BTW. Marik broke his nose, so of course he'll have issues speaking normally.
Hope you enjoyed!