There was something that I was starting to realize about Damon Salvatore. He has a soul. He was a lot less of the Damon I once knew, that Damon that I first met. There was a change to him that was noticeable. I think that I'm the only once noticing it though. The witty comments have completely stopped and I know he hasn't fed off of a human in a while. Which is a big step for him. The more I think about Damon Salvatore the more I am realizing about him. I genuinely don't believe that he was the cold blooded killer that Stefan made him out to be. Yes he was killing people but I think its because there is a lot more to him, he just hid it so well for everyone else but I can see it now so clearly. Damon was so hurt over Katherine and with what Stefan had did that he had no other way to deal with his pain because this is the nature of what he is. Stefan was easily able to deal with the transition because he wasn't as hurt over losing Katherine as Damon was. Damon lost the love of his life and his brother at the same time.
Damon was just a foot away from me sitting across the hall as we both sat in quiet with Stefan locked on the other side of the steel door. So many thoughts were coursing through my head. I don't think that Stefan will ever be the same again. Damon is right, Stefan has spent so long fighting this that he has no idea how to control. Where as Damon...Damon does have all of this under control, a lot more than I thought he did. I don't know if Stefan will ever be the Stefan that I knew, the man that was so level headed about everything. I thought he did have everything under control but I was wrong. I still had the paining feeling that this was all of my fault. I fed him my blood that night that Damon helped me get Stefan out of the house that Pearl and the other vampires were staying at.
Were my original thoughts of these two brothers completely wrong? Is this who they both really are?
Not only did Damon seem to have an ease to his control, there was something else about him. I looked over at him, into his icy blue eyes. Behind all of that, I swear that I can see kindness. If this would have been a month ago Damon would have let Stefan run lose killing everyone. He definitely wouldn't be sitting a foot away from me with Stefan locked up. The silence between the two of us right now was killing me with all of my thoughts running through my head.
"Damon?" I asked quietly. Damon straight into my eyes and I took in a sharp breath. "Why did you stay down here with me?" There was a moment of silence before he finally answered.
"I didn't want you to be alone."
I completely stopped breathing for a second. I was letting the words that Damon has just said sink in.
"If you didn't want me to be here, you could have just said something." With that Damon stood up.
"No! That's not it at all!" I quickly rushed the words out. Damon looked at me, raising one eyebrow questioningly. "I...I was just curious because lets be honest, if this would have been a month ago, you wouldn't be sitting here with me."
"I already told you why I was done here. I'll just go." The icy tone that I had known so well from Damon, that I hadn't heard in a while had just come back. He began walking down the hallway when I heard the words come out of my mouth in a whisper.
They were quiet but I knew that Damon could hear me. I looked up at him and I think that he could see that there was a plead in my eyes. Damon didn't say anything but walked to the spot that he had just been sitting in and sat back down. Neither one of us said anything but there was a strange comfort that he was bringing to me right now. I don't know if its because of whets happening to Stefan or not.
I started remembering the night in the woods at the ruins of the church. The night that Damon thought that he was going to release Katherine from the church. I remember him running inside to see if she was in there, to go rescue her, the one person he truly cared about. After he realized the she wasn't in the tomb, that she never was. This whole time she has been out in the world, in capable reach of him but she never made him aware of her existence. I saw how broken Damon really was that night. I knew that he needed someone. I had wrapped my arms around him and hugged him with light tears streaming down my face. At the point I didn't even care that Stefan had been near by. It was the smallest thing that I could have done to try to show Damon that I had understood.
After that though he became worse and I was giving up on him.
This though, this was completely different. I know that I'm getting closer to the real Damon. I want to know him.
I yawned lightly and shook my head in a sad attempt to shake it off.
"Maybe you should head upstairs and get a little bit of sleep." Damon offered and I shook my head no.
"I really want to.."
Damon cut me off halfway though. "Don't be stubborn Elena, go upstairs and get some sleep. Stefan will still be here in the morning. I nodded my head, Damon was right and I somewhat didn't want to admit it. I slowly stood up and made my way up the stairs to the first level of the house. I walked up the stairs and stood outside of Stefan's room. That's when I realized that I don't want to stay in his room. I don't want to sleep in his bed. He hasn't been the Stefan that I once knew for a while now and staying in his room will just bring up memories of how he once was. I sighed in defeat.
"Damon." I called out and within a moment Damon was at the top of the stairs right next to me. I looked up into his blue eyes. "I don't want to sleep in Stefan's room." I said quietly and immediately he understood.
"Well I'm sure that you don't want to sleep downstairs, besides I'm not too sure how safe it would be down there anyways. Come with me." With that I followed Damon down a hallway, he opened up two big doors that led into a bedroom. There was a huge bed in the middle of the room. I kept looking around to see a table, on it was a bottle of liquor and a glass. I'm in Damon's room. Its the first time that I'm looking at it.
"Thank you." I said turning to look at Damon. He just nodded his head. This is a little awkward for the both of us. I don't know what else to say but I appreciate how he is acting. Damon walked out of the room leaving me in there by myself.
A big part of me wanted to start going through his room in an attempt to get to know more about him. There was this other part of me though that was telling me not to do that to Damon, to not betray him by going through his personal things.
I sided with the small nagging part in my head.
I got into Damon's bed, getting under the covers. I laid my head on the pillow. The bed completely smelled like Damon. The thing that I wasn't expecting was this immense comforting feeling I got as soon as I was laying down. I breathed in his scent and welcomed the comfort that washed over me. Even if it was from Damon.