Important stuff at the bottom, but read the fic first, I guess.

ScoutxMedic - L-lemon? - Mentions of Medic's possibly ~Nazi~ affiliations and anti-semitism - Whatever


"What a great day to run around" Scout breathed so manry, his lean muscles glistening in the desert sun. He ran so fast and quick to the base pardner.
Medic watched his teamman Scout's magnificent feet fly over the desert sun's floor. He breathed gloriously, his hair being so soft.

Scout leaped like a gazelle rabbit, his pectoral muscles bouncing fruitfully in the sun, his nipples pointing through his tight slinky shirt like a pen through paper.
Medic gasped, his heart fluttering like a baseball card stuck in a bike's spokes. Which may be a bad thing. So he gasped wheezily, clutching his breath in love, swooning at the beautiful Apollo angel before him.

Scout stared at Medic, flowers softly blowing past their faces. Medic blinked his eyes, slowly, lovely. Scout looked at Medic, fantizing about his tight buttocks and making sweet love to him. Scout became aroused, a pink blush splashed on his cheeks.

"Ah...Mein fraulien...You are not looking too...gut." Medic gasped concernedly, reaching out to the ailing young New Englander through the fluttering lackadaisically flower petal filled air with a grisled, manly (jew-killing) glove covered hand and brushed the Sakura-pink adonis face of the Scout. The Scout wanted to slap the offending appendage away, but he ACHIEVED A BONER and had to cover his now Solid Schlong with his masculine baseballcawd holding hands.

"get that hand outta my face kraut." Scout said, blushing and looking down. "SIgN Burrbin" the medic said translationing to -I know you have an afectionete bonor So don't try to hide it- The scout understood his meaning behind the words but not them thereself. "let me take you to my apratment, the desert is killing me with dumb flowers and such." The medic nodded. Then they went. in boston The Scout turned his key in the lock. The tumbers rubbed agenst each other almost as a for telling of what will come. Scout turned the knob and was welcomed by the smell of assorted meats and cream cheeze.

Scout inhaled the meat cream cheese air, his nostrils opening like Medic's legs would so soon. Scout's 40 brothers were all crowded around one tiny TV watching a manly heterosexual hockey game. His mama cooked all day. "Hey family! I'm back from the desert to get a little R n R...rape and regret, that is! Hurk Hurk!" Everyone chuckled heartily. Medic sweated uncomfortable, his sweat pooling on the dirty linoleum floor like it would soon saturate Scout's Darth Vader bedsheets.

Scout gently took Medic's hand, which was bathed in the blood of Jews. Scout dragged his beautiful boy toy along the dirty scummy floor full of human droppings from when he and his 40 other bruddas were young. Walking into his room where his Thomas the Train poster lay, always watching. Walking to his racecar bunkbed, he gently threw Medic into the welcoming arms of the red car his mom bought at Salvation Army. Eating a can of Boston Baked Beans, he leapt upon Medic, Thomas the Train watching with a pleased smile.

Scout slipped his shoes off, Medic looked into his eyes, his hand slowly up the young man's shirt. His fingers tracing his Jabs (??), and then his pecks. Medic made circles around Scoot's aroused nipples. flicking at it with his thumb. Scout bucked his hips. Medic understood that this meant "I want to be inside you." Medic achieved a boner as well, he (scribble) peeled Scout's baby blue base-ball t-shirt off with his (scribble) Agile tongue. Scout fell out of bed, he crawled over to his closet. Medic sat up. "What are you doing?" he askeed beautifully, carressing his belly button. Scout licked his lips, "I'm gonna get my shoes on."

His shoes. Thats what Medic loved the most about Scout. As well as his darling button nose and sexy ass ears. HE FUCKING LOVED SCOUT! But...Those shoes. Made him hotter than a Jew in a concentration camp oven. He remembered the first time he saw those shoes on Scout's succulent feet. "Let me turn on some music" Scout purred like Rhianna into a microphone at the Kid's Choice Awards 2010 because author 4/5 forgot what she was implying about Scout's hot steamy shoes. Did Skout mention that he thought Medic had some HOT. STEAMY. GLASSES? "take me love." Scout yelled. "keep Quiet in there dog" yelled his big pile of brotters.

Finally Scout and Medic did...the deed. He slid Medic's Daisy Dukes off like butter. Medic's penis-length was gigantic, not unlike a California Redwood. Scout took in a gasp. "Jesus Christ Doc. Your dick is a fuckin tree!"
Medic answered with a seductive smirk. "I know," he said germanly. Then he slid his pale, hairless legs apart like silk pillars that wouldn't hold up any building.
Scout finally took the plunge. As in he plunged his peach column in Medic's rear passage.
"Oh Scout! your balls! They are...enormous..."
"Yeah I know. I inherited them from my dead father." Scout grumbled, remembering the death of his father.
Thrust thrust thrust thrust thrust.
Medic was putting on his orgasm face, making many groanings and sweatings. "Oh Scout...rrrrgtggghhhhsiuefhiursghiuohishiuorsghrsiuohgoh!!!!!!!!"
"I'M NOT EVEN WINDED!" Scout screamed orgasmically.
After the deed was done, Medic and Scout laid in Scout's racecar bed, Scout with a cigarette, Medic with an aura of shame. "Scout...eesh leeby deesh."
"Yeah whateva."
Suddenly Scout's bro appeared from top bunk. "What the hell, Gerald?"
"I'M FUCKIN SCOUT" Scout screamed yellingly.

"Whuteva" Scout's brother said, leaping from the bunk bed and running off to watch the game. Scout nestled into Medic's arms, putting his nose into Medic's skin and smelling the German sausage. (??) Scout's eyes rolled back in ecstasy, shaking and licking at the Medic's strong neck.
"Oh meine Liebling ... " Medic squeaked sexily, luring Scout from his Salvation Army bed, into the kitchen where his mom was making brownies while naked.
"Me and Medic are going out for a bit!" Scout yelled over his shoulder.
"Be back before dinnah!" His mom called from over her aroused naked brownie battered breasts.
"You're embarrassing me, mooom!" Scout whined like a 16 year old girl.

His mom cleaned herself off, arousing Medic yet again. Scout noticed. He thought, "his lambido is amazing". Scout's mother, began to cry, realizing that her son was .... homosexual. Within minutes she was on the phone with uncle Stevo. Scout began to weep softly. uncle Steavo was in a cod suit

Uncle Stevo, upon hearing of his nephew's homosexuality, rushed to the apartment.
"WHERE'S GERALD" he manned.
"RUN DOC RUN" SCOUT AND MEDIC RAN ON THE MEAN STREETS OF BAWSTIN MASSACHUSETS


LMAO OH FFFF I LOVE THIS DOK-- I MEAN FANFICTION

I blame Team Fortress 2, TF2 fangirls, and .
yeah. You heard me.

A collaborative effort between some friends and myself. It goes in this order- 62-STAIRS, Uruha, Bai-So-Delish, myself, and the Trev-O-Tron. It's probably easy to pick up on each writing style (Stairs and Uru adding -ly to -ing ending verbs), my long ass-sentences, how Trev cannot spell at all) but it wasn't all my doing. I promise.

All spelling errors kept intact because it's even funnier that way.

This probably should be at the top.

Whatever.