We don't claim ownership and stuff.

A/n from Kirbey: Yeah I kinda lazed out for a while so we haven't published anything. BUT now I forced myself to do something and we should start updating regularly again...if anyone cares. Hope you enjoy the first part of the first tale.

A/n from Jessica: ok so bare with us if u dont like this but this a story where ted and cody literally act like children. ooh ooh! kinda like tht episode of raw where they had a ted vs cody vs john match and they fought and Randy had to play daddy-it's like that.


"Please?" Cody Rhodes begged, "I promise I'll listen to Ted and follow all the rules!"

Randy Orton looked back and forth between the pleading faces. Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes had been begging him for weeks to let them go out to a club alone together. Although Cody and Ted had been out alone many times before, Randy was very wary of the particular club they wanted to go to. Randy's boys belonged to him and only him, but others seemed to forget that and often tried to put their grubby hands on what was his.

"Yeah!" agreed Ted, "I'll follow the rules too!"

Randy sighed, "Ok fine, you can go."

"YES!" Cody jumped up in joy.

"Do I need to go over the rules with you one more time?" Randy eyed the two, hoping he'd made the right decision.

"NO!" Ted said, ready to walk out of the room and get to the club.

Randy grabbed Ted's arm and turned him back around. "I think I'd feel better if you heard them one more time."

Ted rolled his eyes and sat down on the couch across from Randy. Cody slid next to Ted, just happy Randy was letting them go.

Randy cleared his throat ready to begin, "Number One: Never talk to a stranger."

Ted groaned slumping into the seat.

"Two: Never take candy or other gifts from a stranger….That includes video games Cody," Cody flinched at being singled out. "Number three: Never ever go anywhere with a stranger. Four: Don't keep secrets from me-especially if someone asks you to. Five: Your body is your own personal property and nobody else's business… except mine… especially the private parts. And most important use common sense, please."

Ted sighed, "Ok so we can go now?" Ted stood grabbing Cody's hand and pulling him to his feet.

Randy stood, "Be careful," he walked up to his boys, and placed a quick kiss to each of their lips. "Hold Ted's hand if you go through a big crowd, ok Cody?"

Cody nodded trailing out of the room behind Ted.

"But Teeeeeeedddddy!!!" Cody pleaded hanging on to Ted's arm.

"I'm just going to get a drink- you don't have to come with me." Ted pushed Cody away yet again.

"But Randy said to stay together!" Cody tried again.

"Really?" Said Ted, "I don't remember him saying that with the rules Cody."

Cody paused thinking, "Oh… Yeah but still-!"

"It's ok Cody I'll be right back. I'll even bring you a drink." Ted finally pried himself out of Cody's grip.

Cody sat alone in silence sipping his Appletini. He glanced around, looking at the many strangers who surrounded him.

Cody felt a tap on his shoulder, and turned around, "Ted you were gone for forever!! Oh…" He turned around to face someone who wasn't Ted.

"Hey," Batista cooed, "you alone tonight Cody?"

"Uhhhhhh…well…uhm…" Cody stuttered. He slid out of the seat he was in, and took off to the bar where Ted was. "TED I-!!" Cody stopped now that he noticed what Ted was doing. Cody gasped immediately pulling out his cell phone.

"RANDY! RANDY!" Cody shouted into the phone.

"What Cody?!" Randy panicked- every horrible possibility running through his head. "Where's Ted?"

"TedleftmeatthetableandthenthebigguytriedtotalktomeandthenIfoundtedandhestalkingtoascarystranger!!" Cody explained quickly.

"Cody talk cohesively. Now what did Teddy do?" Randy really began to worry after hearing Cody's panic.

"HE'S TALKING TO THE BIG SCARY GUY BALD GUY!" Cody finally said slowly.

"Is that it?" Randy sighed in relief that Ted hadn't been hurt or worse.

"Yeah... but I think the guy wants to touch his private parts and you said-!" Cody confided in Randy.

"I know what I said. Put Ted on the phone." Randy said, still relieved but now angry Ted wasn't following his rules.

Cody tapped Ted on the shoulder interrupting his conversation, "Randy wants you." Cody smirked pushing the phone to Ted.

"I'm busy!" Ted pushed the phone away. "Go back to the table."

Cody shrugged, "Ted said he's busy, so go back to the table."

Randy began to get really irritated with Ted, "Well tell him I said get his ass on the phone, now."

Cody shoved the phone back at Ted, "he says get your ass on the phone now." Cody tried to imitate Randy's voice.

Ted rolled his eyes, "Hello? Yes. Yeah bu-…I know. Ok. OK!" Ted slammed the phone shut and threw it back at Cody. "Come on we have to go home thanks to you!" Ted turned back towards the stranger he had been talking to. "Bye Glen." Ted grabbed Cody's hand roughly and led him out of the club towards the car.

"Are you mad at me Ted?" Cody asked.

"Hell yeah I'm mad at you. You tattled and Randy's pissed!" Ted yelled at Cody. "I'm not talking to you anymore." Ted started the car and began driving.

"But Ted!" Cody pleaded.

"Oh wait is that the wind I hear?" Ted explained, trying to pretend like he didn't hear Cody. "Oh..no that's just SOMEONE I'M NOT TALKING TO." They rode the rest of the way in silence.

"When we go in here back me up ok? You already snitched on me and I don't need to get in anymore trouble." Ted told Cody as they rode up the elevator to Randy's room.

"I thought you weren't talking to me?" Cody spat back.

Ted didn't answer, remembering his campaign not to talk to his lover. They walked into the room in silence and were greeted by a seething Orton.

"I'm sorry Randy -it won't happen again. I just thought since I was in public, and people were around it didn't matter." Ted broke down as soon as he looked into Randy's angry eyes.

"Was the rule don't talk to strangers but in public it's ok?" Randy asked. Ted shook his head. "Ok just making sure. You're lucky Cody called me and told me what was happening." Ted shot Cody a dirty look. "Don't be mad at him- you're the one trying to get yourself hurt."

"Yeah, don't be mad at me," Cody smirked at Ted. "Randy! He won't even talk to me right now!"

Randy kept his attention to Ted, "Teddy, apologize to Cody."

Cody moved closer to Ted's face. Ted mumbled a half-hearted apology.

"Teddy," Randy warned.

"I'm sorry!" Ted said sounding sincere.

"Apology accepted!" Cody exclaimed. Ted moved in close to Cody's face and pressed their lips together passionately.

"Good," said Randy satisfied. "Now back to the issue at hand. Do you all know all the tricks people can use to lure adorable guys like you into bed?" Cody and Ted both shook their heads. "Well…"

Cody stared straight ahead wide eyed. "They really do that?"

Randy nodded, "yup."

"Even the thing with the big white van and the starbursts?" Cody asked in awe.

"Yeah Cody, so you have to listen to my rules next time ok?" Randy asked. Cody nodded in agreement. Ted continued to stare ahead. "You promise Teddy?"

"He wanted to fuck me?!" Ted's jaw dropped.

Randy sighed, "Yes Ted, he probably wanted to have sex with you."

"Oh," Ted snapped out of his trance. "Well yeah I'll follow the rules."

"Good," Randy said. "So, it's still early you guys want to go do something?"

"Can we go to a club?" Cody asked hopefully.

"We just left from a club," Ted reminded Cody.

"But, I want to go again…With Randy!" He added.

Randy chuckled, "Ok we'll go to a club... but a different club I don't trust that one you went to earlier."

The three loaded into Randy's car, all ready to have fun for the night. "Can I play my CD?" Cody asked, he had called shotgun and enjoyed playing DJ.

"No!" barked Ted from the back knowing exactly which song Cody was going to play.

"Go ahead," Randy overrode Ted's authority.

Cody slipped the CD into the player and skipped to track 7. One, two, three. Not only you and me. Got 180 degrees, and I'm caught in between. The annoying voice crooned over the speakers.

"Oh no," Ted groaned.

"Getting down with 3 p, everybody loves ohhhh....Cody sang loudly, muffling Ted's groans.

Cody continued to repeat the song all the way to the club.

"Let's go over there Ted!" Cody tugged at Ted's sleeve pointing to a cove of comfy looking chairs. "I don't like this song- besides I'm tired!"

Ted looked at Randy for approval not wanting to cause any more trouble. Randy nodded giving them the go ahead.

Cody pulled Ted the whole way to the seats, only to be greeted by a dark haired scruffy man. "Oh, sorry," Cody mumbled not wanting to interrupt whatever CM Punk was doing.

"No you're fine," Punk responded, his voice was gruff yet somehow calming. "You two can sit here too."

Cody began to pull away, but was stopped by Ted. "Come on Cody don't be a baby. We can sit here without talking to him."

Punk laughed, "Come on Cody, Ted, you think I'd hurt you?"

"No, we can sit here" Cody said nervously, trying to prove how tough he was to Ted.

"Good," Punk told them. "Hey, Cody I've heard you have a bit of a thing for comics?"

Cody jumped up and down ecstatic that he had found someone who actually shared his passion. "I do! I love all kinds of comics!"

Punk laughed again, "Have you seen the new spider-man comic book?"

"Psh, of course! I got it the day it came out!" Cody was very passionate about his literature.

"No! Not that one. The other new one- the one that hasn't come out in stores yet!" Punk fished for a lie.

"What? You have that!?" Cody's eyes lit up.

"It's out in the parking lot in my hummer. Wanna come see?' Punk offered.

"Yeah, of course!" Cody agreed quickly.

Ted pulled at Cody's arm leading him out of earshot of the man, "Cody what are you doing? What about the rules?"

"He's not a stranger- it's CM Punk!" Cody protested.

"But we still don't really know him." Ted said.

Cody shrugged, "But that doesn't make him a stranger."

"But what about the rule Randy told us about not excepting gifts?" Ted asked.

Cody rolled his eyes picking up Ted's habit. "He said don't take video games- he didn't say anything about taking comics."

"Cody! I'm going to tell Randy if you go with him!" Ted warned.

"I thought you said snitches were bitches?" Cody argued.

"I did but-"Ted started not really finding a good comeback.

"Ted it's the new Spider-man comic!" Cody explained. "Just sit here and wait. I'll be right back."

Cody followed Punk through the crowd closely. Ted sat on the couch and waited for Cody's return.