~ The Malfoy Family Code of Conduct ~

Summary: Every little rule a member of the illustrious Malfoy family needs to live by in high society even if none of them truly made any sense to Harry no matter how much Draco explained them.

Pairings: Draco/Harry

Warnings: Alternate Universe, Clueless Ron, sugar-high Dumbles, know-it-all Hermione

Disclaimer: Is Harry Potter an ambitions, cunning, sneaky Slytherin? No? Then I do not won Harry Potter.

The Malfoy Family Code of Conduct

Every little rule a member of the illustrious Malfoy family needs to live by in high society.

Rule Number One: Malfoy's are always impeccably dressed. No Malfoy should wear clothing that makes him similar to a mudblood. It degrades their status and only puts shame on the Malfoy name.


It was a Sunday and the Golden Trio were sitting outside during the wonderful weather they were having. It was currently spring and there wasn't a cloud in the sky to keep them inside. Technically they were supposed to be doing homework but the teacher's were slave drivers and they were only taking a small break. Well Ron and Harry were at least. Hermione was reading from another of her huge textbooks that she carried with her everywhere. Honestly were all that knowledge was stored was a mystery to Harry.

Ron was lying against the one tree that wasn't occupied by some small group of first years fast asleep. He honestly reminded Harry of an animal the way that he ate food and then slept while he digested the food. It was kind of sickening when you truly though about so he decided against it for his mental health.

Harry was skipping rocks by the lake. It was a calming exercise that he couldn't do anywhere else as he didn't have a lake at the Dursley's or at the Burrow or Grimmauld Place. This was the only location so he was relishing in it. After all it wasn't everyday that you skipped rocks, hit a giant squid and then got dunked by said squid in retaliation . . . not that he was attempting to do such a thing. That would be reckless and stupid . . . typical of a Gryffindor . . .

Nope he wasn't doing anything like that!

That's when Harry noticed someone walking around the lake as well terrorizing younger students. Said person also had a pair of weighty goons backing him up. No question as to who that was then. Of course as he approached, Harry simply had to say the first thing that crossed his mind like the truly foolish Gryffindor that he was.

"Hey Malfoy, why do you always wear a suit beneath your robes?"

Later you could hear everyone discuss the momentous occasion when time literally stopped for a second before continuing without the aid of magic.

Hermione was staring at Harry in worry as he once again jumped in feet first. Ron had actually woken and fallen over though no one seemed to notice. Of course everyone was staring at the unusual reaction when a Malfoy and a Potter entered the same space. Normally the pair shouted then hexed each other. Today was different. In their books different was bad.

This one question left Draco flabbergasted (not that he would admit it later). Why did the "great" Harry Potter want to know why he wore a suit? Honestly why would he even care? They were rivals and shouldn't have to ask idiotic questions that could simply get them killed later on. Oh well one less reason to worry later in life then.

Not seeing the harm, Draco answered.

"I unlike you have a highly refined sense of fashion and dislike walking around looking like some scum that the Auror's have pulled from the side of the road." Draco said with the usual nose in air.

Even if he was being civil to Potter he did have an image to uphold. He was a Malfoy after all!

"Scum? What do you mean dress like scum? I didn't know scum wore clothes?" Ron asked not quite understanding who he was talking to yet.

Hermione was hard pressed not to hit him over the head with her Ancient Runes text book. Honestly could he get anymore hard headed?

Harry simply continued talking to Draco. "You know you could always wear clothes that teens wear and still look better than the "scum" right?"

Draco sniffed.

"Why would I want to look like an ordinary teenager? I am a Malfoy and as such there are certain rules and regulations that one has to live with to uphold the family homer," Draco said ignoring the looks of disbelief he was being given by the Golden Trio.

"Honour? What honour does a Malfoy have?" Ron asked snidely.

Everyone rolled their eyes it was good to see that Ron had finally caught up with who they were talking to. Now if only he could grow a brain . . . what a dream.

Harry ignored him. "What rules and regulations would that be Malfoy?"

"That would be the rules that my ancestors created to make sure the prestige of the Malfoy name didn't fall to ruin. Every generation learns from them and adds to them when needed. Some of them are archaic but we abide by them anyway to learn from past mistakes that our ancestors have suffered." Draco answered with a nod of his head.

"Perhaps don't follow mad men should be added to the list . . ." Ron muttered darkly.

"So what rule does the suit come under then? Why would it be important at all to wear something as stuffy as that?" Hermione asked curiosity getting the better of her.

"Ha! As if a mudblood would understand the numerous rules there are to the Malfoy family. Not wearing a suit! Pah! The very idea is preposterous!"

"So the Ron could learn?" Harry asked.

"No bloodtraitor would be able to learn something as sophisticated as the Malfoy Family Code of Conduct." Draco said insulted that someone of that standing would be able to follow his family's rules.

"What about me then?"

Everything paused once again. Honestly, twice in one day what was occurring in the world? Did Hell freeze over? Was that it because something wasn't right about this at all?

Draco walked over to him his hand on his chin as he walked around Harry trying to gain some intellect on how Harry presented himself and whether it would in fact be possible. He had no idea why he was doing so but it would be like a project of his. "Turn Harry Potter into a noteworthy Malfoy", yes that could be the title. Wouldn't his father be proud . . .

"Hmm, it would be very difficult but I could see you following some of the rules. Perhaps with a bit of training I could fine tune some of your less notable qualities . . ." he trailed off muttering to himself.

With Harry's looks it would take a lot of work but it would be worth it. Perhaps it could work . . . perhaps . . .

Harry just watched Draco with a bored expression. "Alright so what is rule number one?"

Draco came to a decision and stood with a straight back almost like Professor Snape in teacher mode.

"Rule Number One: Malfoy's are always impeccably dressed. No Malfoy should wear clothing that makes him similar to a mudblood. It degrades their status and only puts shame on the Malfoy name."

Everyone goggled at that and twitched in laughter. Figures the Malfoy's would have a rule like that as their first.

"Alright then." Harry said suppressing the urge to laugh.

Draco turned away as if not bothering to explain it any further but as he turned back Harry decided that he was in deep trouble.

"Oh and Potter, I shall be testing you and teaching you at a moment's notice so don't expect any warnings. One moment you shall be by yourself and the next I will be teaching you another Malfoy rule. There is no place you can hide from me."

Yep the smirk on the blonde's face said it all. Harry Potter was officially screwed.

Got a rule the Malfoy family would live by? Hilarious and funny and don't even make sense? Send me a message.

Updates for this story shall be random and done when I please.