gidghgsdam afyghas ho shit I updated. giggity.

Chapter Three

Sasuke was more than alarmed when a green blur he recognised as Lee zoomed past Naruto's bike (which was already going at an unnatural speed that threatened to bring up his dinner) and sped off into the distance ahead of them.

"That was... did you see...?" Sasuke gaped as he held onto Naruto's waist for dear life (which he really wasn't complaining about).

Naruto let out a harsh bark of a laugh that made Sasuke jump skittishly. "Sometimes I wonder if 'youth' is actually a nickname for 'every steroid on the planet'," he called over the rush of wind and the scream of the high-powered engine they were straddling.

Sasuke was about to reply with something resembling agreement when Naruto sharply turned a corner without warning. The vertigo Sasuke felt as their knees came dangerously close to the badly surfaced road was bad enough, but the fact that he felt every single one of Naruto's shoulder muscles contort against his face as it happened meant that he nearly let go.

"Hold the fuck on!" Naruto shouted as he righted the vehicle, as if it was Sasuke's fault that Naruto had extremely developed muscles which the Uchiha was being forced to rest his face against. Not that Naruto knew Sasuke was freaking out over his shoulder muscles, but he could at least consider that Sasuke had never been on a motorbike before this.

Unless you counted that horrific scooter he had been forced to ride around before he got his driver's license. But Sasuke now made a point of not considering anything under 125cc's worthy of vehicle status. And he had burned all photographic evidence Itachi possessed of the humiliating thing.

He hoped.

To distract himself from the oncoming threat of upchucking all over his fit instructor, Sasuke chose to look across the bay they were currently making their way around. Across the other side of the mirror-like water, Poros town shimmered with lights like a baby Vegas. He could see the flickering luminosity that indicated the presence of a rooftop open-air cinema, and the ominous white clock tower at the very centre of the town loomed over the other buildings like a sore thumb.

He was loathe to admit it, but it was quite pretty.

Sasuke realised then that Naruto was driving away from the town. He could see the green flash of Rock Lee heading down a different route towards the lights, in the opposite direction to where the blonde was taking him.

Shit, he's going to rape me, was Sasuke's first thought, and as irrational as it would have seemed to him at any other time, those few Becks' he'd drunk earlier seemed to have addled his brain into paranoia.

Naruto had taken them into a residential area which was more than a little dilapidated looking (though most things in Poros appeared that way up close), and the blond turned the bike up a very steep side street that made Sasuke give a short squawk before tightening his hold on the other man's waist.

All the while, Sasuke's mind was chanting rape rape rape.

It didn't occur to him to ask where they were going until Naruto pulled up outside a particularly run down looking building and turned in his seat to glance at Sasuke, and said, "Sorry about the detour, I just need to pop up to my apartment and change. I don't really fancy going in stuff I've worn all day."

The rape chant stopped and Sasuke mentally smacked himself for being such a girl. "Sure. Whatever," he replied in his coolest, most nonchalant voice, as if he hadn't just been going through his old self defence classes in his head should rapage ensue.

Naruto raised an eyebrow though as if he could hear Sasuke's internal monologue (he couldn't, and Sasuke knew this because people of lesser intelligence would go crazy if they could hear the workings of his genius brain).

"Well, don't just sit there. Come up and have a beer," the blond said, swinging his leg off the bike and heading up the crumbling steps to the front door without a backward glance. Sasuke scrambled off the bike, tripped on the curb (gracefully), and then climbed the steps after Naruto.

He had to admit, he was more than a little intrigued to see the inside of Naruto's apartment. He had no doubt it would give him a great insight to the inner workings of Naruto's American mind. Not to mention that he was a little turned on by having been invited upstairs by the man.

All thoughts centralising around his dick were promptly scattered however when Naruto opened a door on the third floor of the apartment block, and a red thing flew at Sasuke's face.

Sasuke screamed as the thing (which was vaguely identifiable as a deranged looking cat) dug its claws into the sides of his head and screeched at him, spitting all over his face. He dimly registered that Naruto had a hold of it and was trying to get it to unhook itself from the Uchiha's head, which was now bleeding.

"No, Kyuubi! Let go of him! Jesus Christ you fucking psycho-moggy, LET THE FUCK GO!"

"MRAGHHHH!" the cat shrieked at Sasuke's face.

"ARGHHHH!" Sasuke screamed back at it. And for some reason, it fell silent and let Naruto disengage it from Sasuke's face. It watched Sasuke with a wary expression that strangely seemed to border on adoration when Naruto put it on the floor in the middle of his tiny apartment.

Perhaps Sasuke had somehow asserted that he was the alpha male.

"Sorry about that," Naruto said weakly, looking a bit haggled. "He used to be a really nice cat but since the plane journey over here he hasn't really been the same... I think it may have been the cabin pressure or something. Oh shit, you're bleeding!"

"Huh...?" Sasuke reached up and touched the sides of his face, and sure enough his hands came back red. It didn't feel like much but Naruto practically fell over the psychotic cat trying to get to one of the cupboards above his sink, where he pulled out a massive box full of plasters, bandages and what looked like sterilising wipes.

Sasuke could only blink as he was pushed down onto the sofa and then Naruto was straddling him, pushing him against the backrest and Naruto leaned in close to his face... Wait, what?

"It doesn't look that bad, but I'll have to disinfect the scratches and probably superglue them all the same," Naruto said, and then it clicked in Sasuke's mind that he wasn't being seduced but in fact Naruto was playing doctor. And not in the kinky way.


It occurred to Sasuke then that his crush on Naruto was a lot more extreme than he had first realised.

"Do you... do you have to straddle me?" he demanded in the most rigid, uptight British voice he could muster in such a situation.

"Hm?" Naruto looked up from where he was rifling around in his medical box. "Is there a problem?"

"Ever heard of personal space, you idiot?"

Naruto raised one blond eyebrow, a small smirk on his face. "Alright, alright, keep your duck-butt on." He slid off Sasuke's lap and seated himself on the sofa next to him. Sasuke breathed out silently.

"Do you want bandages, or shall I glue the scratches?"

"I don't give a fuck, just hurry up already."

Naruto laughed. He unwrapped a disinfectant wipe and cleaned the scratches. It stung a little, but Sasuke made no sign that it did. He stared stoically ahead, watching Kyuubi walk into stuff. Yeah, that cat was a little gone in the head.

Naruto glued the scratches shut and put away his medical kit. "Right, I'm going to change. There's beer in the fridge." He gestured at the old refrigerator that was humming loudly and generating a lot of heat.

Naruto disappeared into another room. Kyuubi made a few enquiring noises to the skirting board and then hopped up onto the sofa where Sasuke was still sat. Without thinking, Sasuke began to stroke the fire-engine red cat's head, and soon it was purring and snuggling into his side.

Sasuke couldn't stop thinking about how close he and Naruto had been. Of course, Naruto had only been concerned with clearing up the mess his deranged cat had made, but Sasuke's heart was still pounding from the adrenaline. Naruto had smelled of salt and Lynx deodorant and beer. It was enough to make the hairs on Sasuke's arms stand on end.

The old keyhole shaped clock on the wall tick-tocked noisily. Sasuke disengaged Kyuubi from his side, holding the cat at arm's length warily, and went over to the fridge. He opened it and looked inside, taking in the multitude of beer and lack of anything really nutritious. There was a pot of taramasalata on the top shelf and some ketchup in the door, as well as four cartons of skimmed milk. The rest was just Heineken.

Sasuke took two cans out and closed the door with his foot. He set one on the side for Naruto and tapped the top of the other a few times before opening it. It hissed as he did so, and Kyuubi hissed back from his new position under the coffee table.

Sasuke began to wander aimlessly around the small apartment. As far as he could tell, it had three rooms. The first was the lounge, which had a kitchenette in it. It was the room they had come into when they entered the apartment. The second was probably Naruto's bedroom, and was the room he had disappeared into in order to change. The final one was the bathroom, which was more like a wet room, but was surprisingly clean.

Sasuke drained half of his beer at once as he stared at the porcelain sink, his free hand in his jeans pocket. He was starting to regret wearing denim. It was at least thirty degrees Celsius even though the sun had already gone down a few hours ago. The jeans were sticking to his legs uncomfortably, and he plucked at them in a futile attempt to cool his skin down a little.

His thoughts drifted back to Naruto.

Sasuke acknowledged that he had developed a pretty spectacular crush on his water sports teacher. And it should have been harmless, but Naruto was starting to invade his brain. Everything related back to the obnoxious American, and it was starting annoy Sasuke.

It's not like anything can happen, he mused, still staring at the bathroom sink. A moth bashed itself into the light above his head repeatedly, making a tiny clink noise every time it did. I mean, he's probably bisexual, but he's my teacher! Even if we are practically the same age... Whatever, he probably doesn't like me that way anyway.

"I know my sink is fascinating, but I need to use it now to brush my teeth."

Sasuke tried to control himself but involuntarily jumped a little bit when Naruto snuck up on him. He spun around, feeling his cheeks heat up. Naruto smirked down at him. He had changed into a tight black t-shirt and some camouflage cargo shorts that hung dangerously low on his hips, revealing a little bit of toned stomach and golden happy trail.

"Whatever," Sasuke managed, pushing past Naruto back into the lounge. "Just hurry up already."

He heard chuckling behind him and then the tap running as Naruto brushed his teeth. Sasuke drained the rest of his beer and threw the can in the bin, resolving to try and forget about his crush on Naruto so that he could at least attempt to enjoy the evening a little.

Centro Bar was on the main street that ran through Poros town, overlooking the harbour. It had two floors but wasn't enormous, sandwiched between an open air taverna and an internet cafe. There were tables and chairs outside, but most of the patrons were inside, where music was thumping rhythmically and smoke curled in tendrils around everyone's heads.

Naruto parked the bike across the street, and Sasuke hopped off it with much more grace than before. He followed the American across the street. He could pick out their little gang, who were sat outside rather than inside. They were all chatting animatedly and laughing at Lee who appeared to have really worn himself out running into town.

"Hey guys," Naruto said as they approached, plopping himself down into a sofa bench and yanking Sasuke down next to him. Sasuke glanced around and saw unfamiliar faces.

"Oh yeah, this is Sasuke. Sasuke, that's Gaara, Shino, Ten Ten and Asuma. Asuma owns the school." A guy with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth gave Sasuke a little salute and a grin. Sasuke nodded back politely.

They lapsed into conversation, much of which Sasuke just listened in on, and the drinks were ordered over and over again. Sasuke decided to stick to beer. Once upon a time he might have mixed his drinks, but his hardcore drinking days were long over (not that they had really existed), and judging from the way just a few beers were affecting his mind and libido tonight, he didn't really want to risk making a fool of himself.

It was a safe, sensible choice. His Uchiha ancestors would have been proud.

Of course, he didn't bank on Naruto buying six rounds of shots.

Now, Sasuke was not a pervert by any stretch of the imagination, but even he could notice an innuendo in the fact that Naruto ordered everyone else tequila, and "blowjob" shots for Sasuke. These were basically just Bailey's cream liquor with whipped cream on top, but the catch was that Sasuke wasn't allowed to use his hands. In essence, he had to deep throat the glass, hold it in his mouth and then tip his head back to receive the contents.

Yeah, Naruto was definitely implying something.

At first, Sasuke refused to take the shot in the prescribed way. He liked Bailey's well enough, so he kept trying to use his hands so as not to make a fool of himself. But then Naruto pinned his hands behind his back.

Well, to say the least, he had to cross his legs at that point. Naruto's hands were hot and strong on his as they pinned them into the small of Sasuke's back. And then, with everyone watching, Naruto pushed one hand into the back of Sasuke's hair and pushed his head down to the table, forcing him to take the shot.

Sasuke left for the bathroom shortly after, his face an interesting shade of mauve.

The men's room had a light switch on a timer, and halfway through washing his hands it went dark. This didn't bother him so much. What did were the ominous green eyes that practically glowed in the dark behind him when he turned around.

"FUCKING JESUS CHRIST!" he yelled, smacking the light switch to reveal the redheaded guy, Gaara. He looked a little less psychotic now that the light was back on. But only a little. He had massive bags under his eyes as if he hadn't gotten a wink of sleep in his entire life, and his whole demeanour just spoke of menace.

"Naruto likes you," he said quietly, but Sasuke heard every single syllable as clear as a bell.


"Break his heart, and I'll fucking find out," he hissed. Sasuke flinched back, his arse hitting the sink. Gaara went on, "He's one of the most honest, pure people you'll ever meet in your entire, pitiful life. Appreciate him."

Sasuke just stared, working his mouth but not making any sounds. Was Gaara... trying to give him romance advice? And wait, did he just say that Naruto liked him?

Well, if the blowjob shots hadn't confirmed that, hearing it first hand from one of Naruto's best friends certainly did.

Gaara seemed satisfied that Sasuke had got the message, because all of a sudden he smiled in a creepy way that was probably supposed to be friendly. "C'mon, the others are waiting. We're moving to the next place."

Sasuke followed the creepy man out of the bathroom and down the stairs. They emerged out into the warm night, swatting at mosquitoes, to find the whole group stood on the street waiting for them. A blonde girl had joined them, and introduced herself to Sasuke as Ino. Well, introduced was one word for it. Sasuke would have thought it better described as eye-rape.

"We thought we'd pay Malibu a visit before heading up to the Poseidon," Sakura told Sasuke as they began to walk further into the centre of town. Expensive yachts were tied up at the harbour with little shoe baskets on the ground next to the gangways. Rich people waved in a superior way as they passed, some calling to Asuma or Naruto. Sasuke assumed that they had paid the ski school a visit at some point.

"So, what's Malibu?" he asked, dodging around a girl puking into a flower bed.

"Oh, it's a bar we used to go to all the time until we found the Poseidon," Sakura replied, flicking her hair over her shoulder and smiling at him. "Naruto likes it because he can get up on the barrels."


"You'll see what I mean," she giggled, and then they were standing outside the bar. Poros really was a small town, you could probably walk through the entire centre in ten minutes. Malibu bar was garishly decorated with the neon signs everyone seemed to favour out here, and had a multitude of palm trees outside its doors. Music that Sasuke recognised as being in the charts back home was thumping inside, and he could see through the door that the dance floor was already packed.

Naruto pushed his way through the group until he was by Sasuke's side. "C'mon, I'm getting you another drink," he said, winking mischievously, and Sasuke felt his stomach flip as Naruto grabbed his arm and dragged him into the bar.

They weaved through the dancing throng, smoke billowing around their heads. Sasuke found himself desperately wishing that there was a smoking ban imposed in Greece, like there was in Britain. He had never really noticed until now how annoying it was when people smoked inside bars.

Naruto yanked him up to the bar, where a girl who couldn't possibly be of legal age to serve alcohol took a shouted order from him and set out eight shot glasses on the bar. As she ran off to get several bottles of spirits, Sasuke looked at Naruto.

"At least half of those better be for you."

Naruto chuckled and placed his hand on Sasuke's shoulder, leaning in close. His breath was hot against Sasuke's ear as he said, "I'm just trying to loosen you up a bit." Sasuke shuddered as that searing hot hand slid slowly from his shoulder to the base of his neck, the fingers curling gently around the back of his throat and the thumb brushing against his jugular. Naruto chuckled in his ear as Sasuke's breathing sped up.

"You aren't gonna turn me down now, are ya Sasuke?"

Sasuke's eyes widened just a fraction when Naruto bit down very lightly on the curve of his jaw, catching the skin briefly in his teeth. It was more a nip than a bite, but Sasuke could feel his legs beginning to shake at the contact.

And then Naruto was pulling away, and passing Sasuke a luminous pink shot.

"Bottoms up!"

No sooner had Sasuke fought his gag reflex off on his fourth shot (and he later worked out, his tenth in total of the evening), than Naruto had grabbed his hand again and pulled him in the direction of the DJ booth. Greasy looking Greek men were grinding up against inebriated tourist girls as a heavy bass thumped through the room. It was really hot, so hot that he could see little beads of sweat at the base of Naruto's hairline. It was kind of sexy actually.

They reached the booth, and Naruto waved at the DJ who waved back, and then Naruto was pulling Sasuke in close as they too began to grind together. Sasuke wasn't usually the type to do any kind of dancing, be it side-shuffling, grinding or full on break dancing, but he didn't have much choice when Naruto's hand was pressed into the small of his back and he found himself chest to chest, pelvis to pelvis with the taller man. He moved his hips in time with Naruto's, trying to keep a blush off his face and fiercely attempting to not look like the girl of the two.

He failed on both accounts when Naruto's hand slid much lower.

"Heh, you're a pretty good dancer. Who would have thought?" Naruto breathed into his ear.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke gasped. He could smell Naruto so clearly as this proximity, and could feel Naruto's abdominals working against his as they danced.

Naruto laughed, sounding genuinely amused. "Seducing you. What does it look like?"

Sasuke was about to form a reply, but then he felt soft, hot lips peppering the side of his throat with cheeky kisses, and lost the ability to think, let alone speak.

"Mm, I really like you Sasuke," Naruto rumbled, his kisses becoming firmer as Sasuke didn't resist, sometimes adding teeth and tongue. Both of his large calloused hands were cupping Sasuke's arse firmly through his jeans now. "You're so fucking sexy, even when you're being all uptight and British."

"N-Naruto," Sasuke stuttered, utterly bewildered and overwhelmed. Was this happening? He'd know Naruto a grand total of a day. Were all Americans this forward or was it just Naruto? Or maybe the Greek air had something to do with it, judging from the way everyone else appeared to be dry humping each other in the room. Shit, even Sakura and Lee were having a little grind.


Sasuke was about to say something, possibly along the lines of asking Naruto if they wanted to find somewhere a bit more secluded, when the DJ mixed a new song in and the tempo changed. Suddenly there were at least five inches between Naruto and Sasuke, and Naruto was cheering at the song selection.

And then Sasuke found out what Sakura meant about barrels, firsthand.

There were several beer barrels positioned strategically near the DJ booth. Some had drinks on them, some didn't. Naruto dragged him over to a free one, leapt up onto it (the crowd cheered at this point), and then pulled Sasuke up onto it as well.

"Give them a show," he purred in Sasuke's ear, and then they were grinding again except this time everyone was watching and cheering (or drooling in most females' cases). Sasuke could feel his face burning as Naruto's hands roved up and down his body whilst their bodies rolled together, back and forth and side to side. Naruto kept his face hovering inches from Sasuke's the entire time, a sexy smirk on his face.

"Looking good," he said, knowing only Sasuke could hear. "You really are such a good dancer."

Sasuke couldn't take it anymore. He brushed some of his bangs out of his face, and then leaned forward and kissed Naruto.

An enormous cheer swept throughout the room, and someone at the bar rang a bell a couple of times as their lips pressed against each other. Naruto's hands slid up into Sasuke's thick hair, holding him in place as he kissed back, taking control. Sasuke put up no resistance when he felt Naruto's strong tongue wrestling its way into his mouth; in fact he welcomed it with his own. The kiss was slow, and hot, and all the while they continued to grind up on that barrel whilst people watched them.

"It's like watching porn," he vaguely heard Ino say from somewhere near his feet, but he didn't care because right now a sex god was kissing him. And boy could Naruto kiss. He wasn't all tongue like a lot of young adults were nowadays, but what he did do with his tongue was absolutely knee-knocking. Sometimes Naruto would pull away just a little, hooking his teeth on Sasuke's lower lip and tugging it teasingly, and they would meet eyes and Naruto would wink.

"Mm," Sasuke heard him rumble as they continued to kiss, their hips still swaying in time with the music. Naruto's voice had dropped several octaves and was deep and slightly raspy. "Good kisser too," he purred, and Sasuke nearly melted.

Eventually, the song finished and they got down off the barrel. Sakura and Ino looked like they were about to have aneurisms, the way they were hyperventilating all over them. Sasuke caught Gaara stood at the back of the room, and was relieved to see that the guy wasn't projecting murderous intent. In fact, there was a tiny grin on his face.

The dancing continued, and Sasuke found himself being back up against a central column. Naruto placed a hand either side of Sasuke's head and pressed their bodies firmly together.

"So, looks like my plan worked," he growled, kissing Sasuke fleetingly. "You loosened up a little."

"I hope you weren't plying me with alcohol in the hopes of getting some," Sasuke replied haughtily, though truth be told he didn't really care that Naruto might have had a hidden agenda. Sasuke had wanted it just as badly, though he hadn't gone to the lengths of getting Naruto drunk to get what he wanted.

"And if I was?" Naruto asked. His tongue dipped out and traced the crease of Sasuke's lips. Sasuke parted them immediately and let Naruto's tongue swirl into his mouth for a second before pulling back.

"So long as you make me breakfast tomorrow, I don't think we'll have a problem."

Naruto smirked. "Best fucking breakfast of your life. Promise."