So, I totally failed to upload the last two chapters 40 years ago. I will upload the last chapter later tonight or tomorrow.
When my symptoms worsened still and I grew weaker, Carlisle started running test. Everything in the tests and MRI pointed to ALS, or Lou Gehrig's disease.
A week later, Alice saw that I would die within three years-if I stayed human. After the denial and screaming at each other, I told everyone that I wanted to be changed within the year. Edward was distraught. Inconsolable. He could hardly look at me or keep it together in front of me. He would curse anyone who came around.
After days of his sulking and ominous behavior, I became angry. "You never intended to change me, did you? You were going to leave me your pet."
"No, love, that is not what I intended. Neither did you. You want more, remember?"
"I do want more, but I also don't want to die, which is where I'm heading because you are selfish."
"I am selfish. I wanted everything for you; I love you, most ardently. It didn't matter what you would've wanted; travel to the moon, marry the Prince of Wales, become a mother. I would have made it happen."
I tried to interrupt him, but he kept venting.
"Now, it will not happen. You will be stuck, frozen forever. Never moving forward, never changing."
"I'll have you."
"You can't guarantee that you will want me forever."
"I will always want you, above everything else."
"You will want something else more; you'll crave it. Blood."
I brushed that off. "I'll handle it."
He wasn't done with his tirade. "I'm afraid you will resent me. Rosalie resents Carlisle for doing this to her. Her resentment overpowers her feelings for Emmett; it overpowers everything."
"I promise I will not resent you. Yes, I will regret not being able to have children, but it will not be because of you."
He wasn't convinced.
He stayed in our den, sitting on the floor in the corner with his head between his knees. He didn't move, didn't twitch, didn't answer anyone. He was a statue for three days. Alice and Jasper were staying with us; when I tripped over my own feet, Edward didn't look up.
After two days, Alice joined him, but she had her far way look on her face. She would gasp and groan every few minutes, but never spoke or left Edward.
"He is overanalyzing, like he always does. You have to let him do it," Jasper stated to me while Alice and Edward had their powwow.
"If there is an answer, he will find it."
After the three day hiatus, Edward jumped to his feet and said he was going hunting with Carlisle. He kissed me, like he was never going to see me again. "I love you, remember that."
I turned to Alice for answers. "Why did he kiss me like that?"
"He is up to something, but he is being very vague about it and blocking me."
"Is he going to let me die?"
"He would never let you die. He wants you to be a mother and will do anything for it to happen. Over the last three days, he has gone through thousands of scenarios, including changing you. He has made a decision, but I can't see it. I can't see anything with anyone. It must shift everyone's futures."
"Bella, do you not see what he is doing?" Jasper asked.
"Being an idiot."
Alice corrected my inaccuracy. "Before we came back, I had a vision of you, married with two kids and being a doctor. You were happy. Extremely happy. Edward came to see you when you were twenty-eight, and you said a final goodbye to him, because you were happy where you were. You told him that you would always love him, but sent him away. I told Edward about this vision on the island; he made his compromise because he knew you would eventually want children and a career. He wanted to make your dreams, the ones you weren't aware of yet, come true. That is why he forced you to stay human and why he is trying to find another solution. In Forks, when you were at Charlie's, I had the same vision. You were just older. Edward was expecting you to say goodbye, forever. He was willing to let you go. He would've let you hurt him, crush him, to have your dream. He loves you that much. Right before you sent him the text, I saw the vision of you and him being parents. You see a selfish idiot. Everyone else sees a selfless idiot."
I couldn't think or see straight anymore. It all made sense; Edward always pushing me to live life.
Before I could respond, Alice gasped and said Jasper and she were leaving; Edward was on his way back.
"He has been gone an hour. He is gone for half a day when he hunts," I observed.
"We'll see you in three days," she yelled as they flew through the door.
Before I could think or move, I was thrown onto the couch and teeth were biting into my neck. Burning, piercing pain shot through me. The last thing I remembered before the black pain took me was Edward.
The blackness held me, cocooned me, for an eternity. I hadn't opened my eyes in days. My chest was heavy with air. My thoughts were blurry, confused. I heard sounds, maybe voices, but couldn't make out any of it. They were too soft, too hushed.
I tried to open my mouth to speak, but my throat was desiccated, severely parched. My eyes felt soldered together. My limbs were weighty with no usage; my head was swimming with pain. I couldn't remember anything. I tried to grasp the split-second images and memories flashing, but nothing made sense.
Was I dead?
After what felt like days of me screaming in my mind for someone to help, I caught and held an image; a dazzling boy with copper hair. I knew him, but couldn't put a name or information to his face. I had a feeling he was someone vital, but couldn't grab the details. The fogginess in my thoughts slowly npbut progressively abated; the sounds which were once low and soft were becoming relentlessly thunderous and comprehensible. It sounded like people were quarrelling, screaming with each other.
"Alice, you need to stop fantasizing. She is not waking up."
Alice? The name tickled my subconscious, but I couldn't remember.
"She is going to open her eyes and ask for you in less than ten minutes."
They were so loud; I wanted to tell them to quiet down.
"None of her vitals show that she is anywhere near where she needs to be."
"Edward, she can probably hear you. Do you really want the first thing she hears to be you gnashing your teeth?"
Edward? A warm feeling flooded me, making me feel safe and secure.
I heard a sharp gasp and a sharp squeal. "Bella, can you hear me?"
"Edward, listen to her heart rate. It jumped when you spoke to her."
"Bella, it's almost over. Just a few more minutes, and you'll be back with me."
Suddenly, everything went black. All of the images stopped.