ShellyCullen: I assure you, the reason I'm beginning this story is STRICTLY for my writing. My teacher had given me some criticism and the only way I can improve such needs is this story. She wanted me to write something real, this is the only way I can think of.
Ikuto: What's up with your teacher, anyway?
Shelly: How should I know?! All I CAN say is this story with have to go with my summer writing program. If you get what I mean…
Amu: I have no idea what your saying… -_-'
Shelly: And the summary…
Summary: When you meet that special person, who makes your heart flutter and your stomach tie knots, you're told he's the one. That's how much I love him, how much I couldn't show him it hurt, because it would surely break his heart, and force him to choose between me and my best friend. I couldn't do that, but I couldn't stop thinking about him; Ikuto Tsukiyomi.
I'm not exactly sure the first time I had gathered the sense to feel butterflies in my stomach, though it felt like a very rational response now. Every time I passed him, my stomach would suddenly knot in this strange way as I tried desperately to keep my gaze locked forward. I tried hard not to turn my head, not even in the slightest movement, in his direction.
Surely he didn't care if I ogled at him like an idiot, I mean, he was used to that stuff. I was just another one of them to him. He didn't care whether I ran in the classroom in order to watch him stroll through that doorway, or hold my breath for any moment he passed by me, brushed on me by accident, or even ask a simple question.
It was okay if he didn't know me other than being that girl in his class, or the one that always lent him pencils. I was okay with this little fact, just as I always had been, and probably would remain content. I simply was happy with such an easy routine between us, because even with the smallest deed I'd given him, his kindness would always be a very sweet gesture.
The bell would end, and as I stood, I made sure to turn my back away from my obsession; but if I had for any reason been of convenience, the boy I liked would casually walk up to me, stop just when he was in reach, and gently pat my head.
Every time I received such a gesture from him, I'd blush lightly and nod, letting my gaze drop to the floor. I always wanted to tell him so much more in that moment, at the very glance where our eyes met and I couldn't help, but wonder if he was somehow sharing a secret of his own. Maybe in a strange, eye connecting way he understood exactly how I felt. Perhaps he was wondering about me, and thinking just as I was.
But every time I'd seemed to muster up such a question after that praise, he'd already be out the door, laughing with his friends; and abolishing my confidence in seconds. I'd sigh, letting my shoulders slump and existing to my next class in silence.
It was the constant push and pull with him. Our relationship had never gone as far as, "What happened to you yesterday?" and the second response always dealt with the fact that he needed me for some homework assignment. I suppose I should feel used and rejected for being handled in such a way, but I honestly wouldn't have cared if that were the case. The fact was, he needed me, whether he knew it or not. I was his right hand and for the moment, that would be enough for me.
Though, after the long school day was over and I comfortably lay in bed, the aching feeling returned to the point where I laid staring at the ceiling and listening as my heart cried in such a rhythmic pace that it hurt. There was nothing more I wanted, and nothing else I so well craved, and the need I knew would never be satisfied.
I couldn't quite understand myself at times like this, wondering how a girl like me got to be so hung over a guy like him. Frankly, it didn't seem to add up in my mind and whenever I checked the difference between us, it was probably obvious why I would never have him.
I was chasing after broken dreams.
Just a little Obsessed
"Amu, are you listening?" I broke my heavy intense gaze to Yaya's wide eyes, obviously upset with my lack of interest. I sighed, crossing my arms at the table and nodding.
"Sorry," I muttered, for better measure. Yaya pouted, just as Rima scrutinized my face.
"Yaya doesn't like being ignored," the girl stated, watching me with pursed up lips.
"She's been out again, Yaya," Rima answered Yaya's unspoken question, and taking one glance at the over crowded Yaya's eyes popped a bit. It was always like looking into a fantastic scene over there. The older crew was there, the athletes were there, and of course the populars were hanging around. It was a table filled with what may have been labeled as hot, but never quite the best.
It was hard not to let my eyes travel back to that table and land on him. He was the best looking one there, the most tongue tangling guy on the spot. How could my friends not already flush at just the quickest glance at him?
"…need to get a new habit," Rima mumbled under her breath, and I sent her a small glare.
"Anyway…" I interrupted over our little dispute to get some conversation in, "I was just wondering about that spring dance." In truth, my usual character wasn't so into dances and such, but I really had the urge to go that night in hope that he would go and see me in a wonderful dress. Of course, I wasn't expecting him to run over and claim me his, but I did have hope for something.
"I don't think we should be attending a dance for such a reason," Rima stated as I blushed, before hardening my glare.
"What…What are you talking about?!" I objected with a hot face. She smirked.
"Now, now," Yaya cut in, dissolving the tension in seconds. She turned to me. "Yaya doesn't want fighting. Yaya wants some sweets, Amu-chi!" She proclaimed, pointing to the lunch line where, ironically, he was waiting in the particular line. My eyes widened, before I calmed myself down.
"O-Okay," I replied, just as Yaya linked arms with me and dragged me over.
I was practically cherry red when I got in line, I was sure. Standing right behind the object of my obsessions wasn't an easy thing to do, and finding the way he smelled pretty alluring wasn't helping either. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath, and watched as Yaya filled a tray with multiple sugary treats.
"Hey, Amu…" Yaya began.
But I didn't even have time to hear her out, because suddenly I knew he was staring at me. That he had turned to gaze down at me and give me his attention. I froze, not hearing anything, but the pounding in my head. I finally focused myself on him, a much harder action than I thought possible.
He gave a half smile, much to make my heart jerk even more, and casually leaned his elbow onto the railing. He leaned toward me slightly, completely relaxed and at eased when I felt a panic attack would come over me. If my face wasn't already the shade of my hair, it must have been ghostly white.
"Hey, strawberry," he called, letting his lips speak much more than the actual words. I gazed at them for a moment, before slapping the thought away. He was right in front of me for god's sake!
"Hey…" I replied back, not quite meeting his eyes. It was hard enough to control my breathing when he stood so close, attracting my focus on him and only him. His look seemed amused.
"Do you have two bucks I can borrow?" He asked, holding out his hand casually. The muscles in my face loosened the slightest bit.
"Um…" I began, digging into my wallet and pulling out two singles. I managed to hand him the money, without meeting his gaze again. He took it, but grabbed my hand as well.
"What?" He asked when I wouldn't look into his eyes. "Are you trying to ignore me?" He questioned playfully as I shook my head furiously. His hand was big, his grip firm, but gentle. I studied his grasp, long slender fingers intact and warm skin that tingled to the touch…
"Hey! That money was supposed to be for ME!" Yaya suddenly protested to us, and I could only risk a glance back at her in mortification. If he new I'd been saving that money for her and just gave it to him, he might figure out of absorbed I was by his very presence!
He didn't seem to notice anything though, and burst into a fit of light laughter. His hand slipped from mine as I disappointedly frowned, before covering it up. He faced his attention to Yaya now, who was glaring furiously.
"Guess she likes me better," he replied, sticking his tongue out playfully. He winked at me, handed the cashier the money and left to go back to his table. In the line, I was sweating hot with my flushing madness.
"Geez, what a cocky dude!!" Yaya exclaimed, grumbling as she gave her food back, unsatisfied. I didn't seem to hear, and instead nodded along with whatever Yaya said.
I practically rushed down the hall to 9th period, most likely beating the record for fastest speed walker. I now clutched my shoulder bag strap and set it down next to my rectangular desk and sat down, staring at the doorway. I rested my elbows on the desk top, intertwining my finger together in the middle and placing my chin lightly on top of them. Time ticked as I waited, a few other students just beginning to arrive.
I shut my eyes, knowing how obvious I was being at looking for him. I shouldn't have been so anxious just to see him again. I had just seen him 5th period, hadn't I? I attempted at relaxing my muscles, tense and alert for his arrival. I was always on edge around him, baffled with just the slightest gaze. How could he have such an effect on me?
The bell rang and I opened my eyes, wondering if he'd already entered. I snuck the quickest of glance to the seat behind me, finding it empty. My heart fell.
Did he go home?
There was a knock on the door as my heart rate quickened once again. Sensei walked and opened it to reveal Ikuto Tsukiyomi in all his glory. He gave her a small smile, though it was more playful and mischievous than anything else, and headed into the classroom. I straightened up when he passed me, as he resumed to his seat.
"Right, Tsukiyomi. How about we try making it on time, hm?" She questioned and I was sure Ikuto made some gesture. The class ignited in hysterics. "Alright, alright. Let's start class now, shall we?"
Sensei finally got through her lecture and let us begin our homework. I grabbed my notebook out and turned to a random page, noticing it was my sketched drawing of Ikuto. I frantically flipped to another clean sheet, and wrote my name at the top. Before I began lesson 25 in our textbook, a foot had kicked the bottom of my seat.
I smiled, though I tried to conceal it, and innocently turned around to meet my prince. The left side of my body turned half way as I rested my left hand on the back of my seat, in my attempt to look at ease. Ikuto hunched over slightly, leaning forward as only his head and upper torso was seen from above the desk.
"You got a clue at what we're doing?" He asked me, bringing his voice a whole tone lower. Whenever he did this, I often found myself biting my lip. Trying to resist the sensation, I swallowed instead.
"Yeah, just writing a paragraph on World War I," I cleared my throat, "and using the terms we took notes on last week." I replied nervously, before turning back around. God, I felt stupid. Who just tells someone they like what they ask, without attempting to prolong the conversation? Why did I have to ruin my chance at speaking to him?! I'm such an idiot!
But before I could complain anymore, my seat was kicked again. This time I made no gesture to relax myself, and turned fast enough to give me whiplash. Ikuto looked off to the side, rubbing the edge of his jaw.
"Yeah, do you have the notes?" He asked sheepishly, giving me another playful smile. This time the blush came fast as I nodded, searching for the page in my notebook and tearing it out. Under that sheet of lined paper stood the drawing of him.
"Here," I stated, handing him my messy scrawl of notes. I was amazed he accepted my notes so easily, considering I didn't have the nicest handwriting to follow. Even so, I was glad he seemed to prefer my presence over anyone else's.
The bell rang, signaling the end of the school day. Everyone was already packed and filing out of the room, as I hastily made a quick effort to cram my book and blank sheet of homework down my bag. I wouldn't be able to catch up to Ikuto if I didn't hurry.
I slung my backpack onto my shoulder and power walked to the doorway. Just as I had, a hand pulled me back in.
"What's the hurry, strawberry?" Ikuto, who was right behind me, asked curiously. I blushed again, pressing my lips together and looking down. It was all I could do from spilling my guts out to him. "Here," he stated, handing me back the papers. "Don't be in such a rush next time. You might just miss out on something." Ikuto left again, leaving me dazed for a moment. I looked back down at the notes I held, before spotting neat lettering on my paper.
I smiled. Yes, I was his strawberry indeed.
"Well, this is Seiyo High," the voice stated as their eyes scanned the building. "Hopefully she'll remember me," the blonde haired kid called, before heading toward the entrance.
Shelly: I am sorry again for starting this story. Truth is, since my grades have caught up, updates will come slower (As most of you can already tell) but again, this is strictly for my purposes of writing and educating, while expanding my English intelligence as well.
Thanks for the tips. I hope I fixed the mistakes right!
Looking at the summary, I'm not quite sure I like it. Please tell me if you'd like it changed!