a/n: Just a quick bit, I wrote this in a few moments as the scene played out in my head. I hope you enjoy
disclaimer: Nope, I own none of it :)
The cement beneath her was breathing. Every pulse the earth gave presented her limp heart a beat. No reason to get up, no reason to open her eyes. Perhaps she could lie here for the rest of her days, molding down into the dirt.
She could get up if she truly wanted to. Even if the laughing and the shouting stopped, though, she doubted she would. The winner could pick her up and fix her. Until then, she hoped no one would notice her.
But the ground pulsed still, and the dirt was staining her clothes. She knew no one would win. She knew they would fight till the end of their days and eventually it wouldn't even be about her anymore. But her head pounded and she knew there was blood. Might as well stay down.
Get up, Harley!
Red would be fine, Mistah J would be fine, the earth felt too cool and welcoming to her burning body to help them and pick a side. The mossy weapons were flying and silly string was landing on her like giant cobwebs.
She could stay like this forever.
That was until she heard the gunshot.
Rising up from her living grave, she opened her eyes to the same scene she had fallen too. Gotham City Park, a tree riddled with her blood, Poison Ivy controlling her plants and Mistah J attacking with his fists. This was how it started, Ivy coming to her defense after Joker popped her a good one to the head. She could see no gun in sight…just the two fighting.
The gunshot was far from here.
Now she felt silly, actually fearing one of them had been shot when she heard the distant bang. She did love them both deeply, but as she rose to her feet, she couldn't help getting upset. Neither of them stopped to see if she was alright. The voice was only in her head, but it wasn't going to be for long.
"That's it!" Harley screamed above the noise. "I've had it up to here with you guys!"
Ivy stopped in mid attack as the Joker dropped his silly string container. Each looked at her in confusion and shock.
"You two listen up and you listen good," Harley said, putting her hands on her hips, "I am sick of you fighting over me! Not that I don't think it is cute and stuff, but it is giving me a headache!"
Ivy slid down from her vine and stood a few feet from Joker, still staring at her friend.
"Harley, can't you see what he does to you is wrong?" Ivy pleaded.
"Red, you know you are my bestest buddy, but I am a big girl and can take care of myself," Harley smiled.
Joker now smugly smiled at the green girl and stepped forward.
"Now don't you be Pooh Bear-ing me, Mistah J," Harley pointed her finger at his nose, which he jumped back from, "I know you got yer anger issues, but you can't be hitting me all the time! Once or twice is fine, I can take it, but you need to know yer limits!"
The Joker stepped back a few feet back and stared at Harley in what looked like almost fear. She smiled, seeing the two in absolute shock, and she was sure they had got it through their heads. With a bounce in her step, she turned and started back to the secret hideout.
"Oh, Puddin'!" She called and held her hand out behind her.
Joker quickly ran behind her and clutched onto the hand. Harley was satisfied and luckily she did not see her Mistah J turn his head and glare at Ivy. Ivy was already staring him down.
With a snarl, she mouthed, "You will pay!"
To which the Joker returned: