Disclaimer: The characters, items, places etc of Naruto are property of Masashi Kishimoto. These objects are used without permission for entertainment only, not for making money. No infringement is intended.
Deidara brings a whole new meaning to the phrase 'floating voter'. UK Election based.
Tick This Box
By Nanaki Lioness
Itachi was quite aware that the word 'politics' made his boyfriend's eyes glaze over in boredom almost instantly, much like his own when he heard the word 'art'. It was the day of the election, and they were walking to the nearby polling station- Itachi briskly and with a mild feeling of something akin to excitement, and Deidara a few steps behind looking sulky.
"Why do I have to vote?" He complained. "I don't care who runs the country, yeah."
"You should," Itachi scolded lightly. "Each party has their own manifesto. You should have researched their policies in detail to make an informed decision."
"Can't I just vote who you are?"
"That really isn't the way this is supposed to work," Itachi sighed. He had taken the time to research policies, watch the televised political debates while Deidara vanished to do something 'less boring' and had come to a decision about his own choice. It was his duty, he felt.
"Can't I just not vote at all?"
"Of course, but then you don't get to complain about the state of the country if everything goes wrong," Itachi shrugged.
"Sure, but I wouldn't listen to you."
"Fine," Deidara sighed, rolling his eyes in annoyance. "I can't believe you get excited about politics. Trust you."
"Concern for this country's welfare is interesting and valid, Deidara," Itachi scolded as they turned the corner, following the large white and blue sign declaring their polling station. It was usually a social club- now it housed a few makeshift voting booths and two rather bored looking ladies sipping tea at a table near the door.
Itachi presented their polling cards, taking a slip of paper and disappearing behind one of the voting booth screens. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Deidara slowly accepted his own paper, sighing in defeat and vanishing behind a screen as well. Turning his eyes to the white slip in his fingers, Itachi marked a sharp cross in the correct box and folded it in two, slipping it into the large metal container at the side of the room with a satisfied smile. This was the first time he had been of legal age to vote, and he was glad to have his say.
Deidara took longer to emerge, putting his inside the box too with a sigh. Itachi gave him a smile and beckoned to the door, leaving them to head back outside again.
"I had no idea who to vote for," Deidara complained.
"Wait- you seriously didn't know a single thing about any of the candidates?" Itachi asked, confused. Election fever had been sweeping the country for a month or so- surely he must have known something?
"I didn't know any of their names, yeah."
"Well, I expected that much. They're our local MPs- didn't you recognise the parties they represented?"
"Not really. I've never voted before and I've never paid attention to any of that stuff. I voted for the guy with the coolest sounding name, yeah."
"And who would that be?"
"That guy at the bottom of the paper- Warhol? You know Warhol is an artist, right? I couldn't think of a better way of deciding to vote!"
"You voted for Warhol?" Itachi asked, eyes widening. "Deidara, do you have any idea what he and his party represent?"
"No...? This is the part where you make me feel like an ass, isn't it?"
"There is absolutely nothing endearing about that man, his party or his party's policies unless you're a prejudiced racist. Not only that, but they stand against homosexuality. That's the main two things, both of which are abhorrent views in my opinion. From the look on your face, you share this ideal with me?"
"I voted for them?" Deidara murmured with one hand to his mouth in surprise before he turned and sprinted back down the path to the polling station. Itachi chased after him, calling out for him to stop.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm getting my vote back," Deidara called over his shoulder as he fell through the doors of the social club. Itachi followed with a little more dignity as Deidara stalked straight up to the metal box, seeing no immediate way inside (Itachi thanked this small mercy, considering if he had have started rifling through votes he had no doubt in his mind the police would be called immediately) before turning to the ladies at the nearby table.
"I want to take my vote back, yeah. I didn't know what I was doing and apparently I voted for... For... Well, the Nazis or something!"
"I'm sorry, but you can't take your vote back," one lady replied with a sympathetic shake of her head.
"But they're horrible! They're..." He turned to Itachi, eyes wide in dismay. "I voted for Hitler, didn't I? I'm a terrible person, I'm sorry! You're right, I should have looked into their policies-"
"Calm down," Itachi interjected, glancing around and seeing all eyes on the room on them. "Come on, let's go home. You can't change it now."
"But some Hitler-like guy might rule the country because of me now," Deidara replied dejectedly as Itachi led him out of the polling station by the arm.
"It's unlikely. They're unpopular, so they won't gain seats. Don't worry about it now."
They walked home in silence, Deidara with his hand tightly clasped in Itachi's with a guilty look on his face. Itachi gave him a small smile, squeezing it gently.
"Cheer up," he remarked lightly. "What's done is done."
"I feel bad about the message and the art I left now," Deidara replied with another long, dismayed sigh.
"The what? Deidara- what did you do?"
"I drew on the paper," Deidara replied with a small grin. "I sketched this little picture of myself smiling and making a peace sign, with a message that said 'Deidara hopes you run the country well' on it."
Itachi looked at him for a moment before chuckling and throwing an arm around his boyfriend's shoulders, prompting a confused glance from Deidara. "You realise that by identifying yourself you invalidated your vote, don't you?"
"That's right. I'm also not too certain artistic pictures and messages would have helped you any, either."
"So my vote won't count?"
"No, it won't count."
Deidara hooted with glee and punched his fist into the air in victory, his usual smile once again on his face. "So they really don't like the idea of two guys in a relationship, huh?"
"That's correct. They don't really like many people, really."
"I feel that we should go home and have some fun," Deidara whispered in Itachi's ear seductively. "To cancel out my vote, yeah."
"The vote that has been voided?"
"Just go along with it, Itachi."
"I didn't say I wasn't going to," Itachi replied with a smirk. Deidara returned it before jogging up the road towards their house, beckoning over his shoulder as he went. Itachi hesitated for a moment before giving chase- no matter the excuse, he certainly didn't object to the idea in the slightest.
Author's Notes: The MP 'Warhol' is fictional, of course. I didn't want to name any real names for this fictional party that may or may not represent a particular far-right party with distasteful views ;) However, I didn't write this for a political debate!
This is just a random little snippet that came to mind after my own vote in the election. Our parliament has some interesting matters on its hands right now, but that's another issue! Thanks for reading!