Chapter 1

Disclaimer-I own nothing!
A/N note- please be advised that this story has drug and alcohol use, swearing, and sex…yea so don't be stupid and read this if you are under age. Thanks :)

Tamaki sat at his desk before the start of home room; he was hunched over writing down a list. He turned around to face Kyouya for a moment.
"Kyouya, I almost have everything planned for our trip after graduation."
"Are you sure you still want to go?"
"Of course! I want to back pack across Europe, it sounds like so much fun. You still want to go with me right?"
Whether he wanted to go or not Tamaki had been bugging him to go this summer for months now. This was going to be their graduation gift to each other. It wasn't all that bad; backpacking across Europe was something he thought about doing eventually.

"Yes, I still want to go with you."
Tamaki turned back around in his seat before turning back to Kyouya.
"Can you believe we graduate tomorrow? This is the last day of high school for us, of being in the host club."
"I know."
"It makes me a little sad to think about it. I mean our family was already broken apart when Mori and Mitsukuni graduated but we pulled through."
"Tamaki you knew this day was coming."
"I know, I guess my mind kept trying to forget."
Kyouya wasn't about to tell Tamaki but he was saddened by the thought of leaving the host club as well. There were so many memories inside of music room three, lots of great times as well.
"Do you think we will stay close to everyone?"
"I don't know Tamaki, but if you want it to happen then I believe it will."
Tamaki turned back to the front of the class room. Hearing Kyouya's words he could stop thinking about tomorrow as a sad day.

The next day went by all too quickly. Before they realized it they had graduated from Ouran Academy. They would never have to go back there again.
"Kyouya, I know we will be hanging out all summer but do you think we could hang out tonight?"
"I'm not doing anything so if you really want to."
"Okay, you can come over my place at five since I know your dad can be strict about people sleeping over."
Before Kyouya could complain about having to go over to his place Tamaki looked down at his phone and cut him off "I have to go before I'm late, I forgot I have to be somewhere. See you at five!"
Tamaki ran off towards his waiting car, leaving Kyouya standing alone and confused.

Kyouya was getting ready to head over to Tamaki's when his phone when off.
"Hey Kyouya, I know I said for you to come here but do you think I could go there?"
"Is everything okay Tamaki? We can always cancel if you have too." He could tell something was wrong; Tamaki's voice was breaking a part. Was he crying?
"No, I don't want to cancel, I can be there soon if that's okay."
"If you want to come, I'm here."
"Okay, see you soon."
Before Kyouya could ask what was going on the line was cut off.

When Tamaki showed up there was no sign of him being upset. Could there have been a problem with his phone, perhaps static?
"Sorry to have to change plans all of a sudden. I hope your dad isn't upset with me."
"My dad is out of town for the next two weeks so don't worry about it. Tamaki is everything okay? You sounded upset over the phone?"
"Did I? Everything is fine. My house is undergoing some work so staying there is a pain that's all."
Maybe he had been overreacting before. Maybe whatever work was being done was what he heard.
"I can't wait for our trip Kyouya; it's going to be great!" With the hyper, normal tone Tamaki's voice carried it was easy for Kyouya to forget about what happened over the phone earlier.

This was the first time they were alone per say. Neither had slept over the others house before this. Kyouya decided that he was going to use tonight to tell Tamaki how he felt, why wait for the trip next week?

Tamaki sat on the floor as they played cards, the moment was perfect. They were joking around anyway so the air was light.
"Tamaki, I…" He stopped as Tamaki went into a coughing fit suddenly. Kyouya reached over to make sure he was okay when Tamaki turned away. Once he stopped he turned back to Kyouya.
"Sorry if I worried you. I started to gag on my spit, as gross as that sounds. I think the construction at home gets to me even when I'm not there."
"Are you okay though?"
"I am now, were you about to say something?"
"Never mind, it wasn't important."
"Oh okay, well it's your turn."

As the night went on Kyouya could tell something was on Tamaki's mind. He knew what he personally wanted to say since he chickened out earlier but he wasn't sure about what Tamaki was thinking. Only Tamaki knew what was on Tamaki's mind.
"Kyouya, I want to talk to you about something."
"Tamaki, I want to talk to you about something."
Both stopped and stared at each other, realizing they said exactly the same thing.
"You first Tamaki."
He shifted his body knowing things could get awkward.
"Well it's just that, I think I love you."
Kyouya tried to make sure he didn't have a dumb look on his face over the excitement he was feeling.
"Is that okay? I bet I just ruined our friendship."
"Don't go making assumptions, why would our friendship be ruined when I lo…" Before he could say I love you back Tamaki had lunged over the table and hugged him.
"Really, you're not upset by it at all? That makes me so happy."
Kyouya noticed Tamaki had tears in his eyes, only he would start to cry over this. Sure he was happy that their feelings were mutual but he wasn't about to cry over it.

"Kyouya can…can I kiss you, or is that too much?"
Without saying a word or a second thought Kyouya pulled Tamaki close so their lips could touch. Tamaki fixed and lowered his hands down Kyouya's back. Not letting Tamaki take control that easily he slid Tamaki to have him sit on his lap better. Unlocking their lips he moved down to Tamaki's neck. He could feel the moan inside the other's throat. Kyouya let up a little, worried he would upset the other. He knew where this was leading and he personally wasn't going to end it. But, he didn't want to force Tamaki if he wasn't ready. As he pulled away Tamaki pulled him back to him. That was all he needed to continue. Both knew it felt a little strange to be making out on Kyouya's floor but neither were about to stop and move.

Tamaki made the first move, trying to control his hands with Kyouya kissing his neck, and moving down. Kyouya let go of Tamaki to take his own shirt off the rest of the way once Tamaki got it unbuttoned. Tamaki used this moment to get his off since he was no longer pinned to the floor. Tamaki knew things were moving faster than he would have liked but everything felt so right. This moment was all they had so they had to make it perfect.

When Kyouya opened his eyes he expected to see Tamaki next to him. He pushed himself up sit up on the floor. They had stayed there all night, no wonder he was sore. Tamaki laid across the room by the TV. His head was under the coffee table. How did he end up like that? If anyone walked in they would swear that they had been drinking last night. Speaking of which he would probably get up, with the sun now up and lighting up the room he didn't like the fact that he had absolutely nothing on.

Reaching towards the couch he looked for pants or something he could put on. As he finished buttoning them up he heard a loud thud and Tamaki's voice.
"Ow, I did not need that." He repositioned himself and slid out from under the table.
"How did I get under there anyway?" As he sat up he noticed the same thing Kyouya did when he woke up. Kyouya tossed him the other pair of pants calming Tamaki down a little.
"I was about to ask you the same thing." Tamaki checked to make sure he didn't cut his head again and quickly slipped on the pants.
"I guess I rolled under there last night while I slept." It was strange how he couldn't remember anything after the sex, and even that was a little hazy. He wondered if Kyouya remembered any more. What he did remember was all good things though, that was a good sign. If he died right now he would die happy. He got to experience falling in love for the first time, his first kiss, his first time making out, and having sex for the first time all last night. All the firsts were covered more or less.

"Tamaki, are you okay?" He looked at Kyouya and realized he probably looked really stupid standing there staring into space.
"I'm fine. I was just thinking about something."
"Oh and what was that?"
"I was just thinking about how I didn't want last night to end."
He walked over to Kyouya and kissed him, hopefully this wouldn't back fire. When Kyouya happily kissed him back Tamaki pushed him over the arm of the couch. Now he was in control, leaning over Kyouya could feel Tamaki's body on top of him. Kyouya pulled Tamaki closer, while he didn't want to stop something didn't feel right, why did he feel sad all of a sudden? Was Tamaki saddened by something? And if so, then what could it be? As quickly as the feeling came it went. Round two had started.

They didn't walk out of his bedroom until a little after one. None of the people on staff were surprised by that. They all knew Kyouya liked to sleep in when he could. When they did decide to get ready for the day Tamaki couldn't stop the tears that were pouring from his eyes. He was glad that the water from the shower was drowning him out. He didn't want Kyouya to over hear him. By the time they walked out to eat he was back to his normal self. Now he just had to make sure he didn't start up again.

"Kyouya, I was wondering something."
"And what was that?"
"Could I stay another night, if it isn't too much trouble, that is?"
"If you want too I don't see why not. But Tamaki, are you okay? I can't stop thinking that something is wrong."
"Everything is fine Kyouya, maybe your just overreacting because you slept poorly last night. I know I'm tired and don't feel like doing much."
He looked at Tamaki closely, he did look tired, and perhaps it was from sleeping on the floor all night that he was over analyzing. Tamaki stuck a forkful of food in his mouth and started gagging. Yea, Tamaki was fine.

After lunch they went outside to enjoy the nice weather. It felt strange to be doing nothing; Tamaki wasn't one to enjoy sitting still.
"Our plane tickets are in my bag at home so that's all taken care of."
"Well that's good. What time is the flight?"
"It's this coming Monday at nine in the morning. I was hoping to get one for later in the day but then learned that it's a long flight so I figured the earlier the better."
"Nine is fine, so in three days we'll be where exactly in Europe?"
"If I say that I think London will you be mad?"
"How do you not know? You're the one planning this trip and you forgot?" He wasn't really mad, or even surprised.
"Sorry our starting location slipped my mind. Let's walk to the park. There is one nearby right?"
He stood up and forced Kyouya up with him. "Come on, don't make me drag you, you know I will."
"I'm coming, relax Tamaki."

It took them about twenty minutes to get to the park. When they did Kyouya couldn't stop himself from laughing as Tamaki hung upside down off the monkey bars.
"If you hurt yourself I'm going to laugh at you."
Tamaki just stuck his tongue out at him as he hung there.
"You should join me, this is fun."
"You are such a child."
"I know isn't it great! Children are always having fun so if I never grow up then I get to have fun all the time as well. I know that if I had a child I would do this whenever we came here to play as well."
"I'm not doubting that Tamaki."
Kyouya had turned around to miss Tamaki wince as a sharp pain shot through him, being taken off guard he let go of the bars. Kyouya turned around when he heard Tamaki hit the ground. He noticed that Tamaki seemed to be out of breath, he looked like he was in pain.
"Are you okay Tamaki." He knelt down next to him being now completely worried; he didn't look well at all.
"I'm fine, the…bar knocked…the wind out of me…trying to get…down…I slipped…landed my chest on the…bar and flipped…over onto the ground. Just…give me…a moment…to…catch my breath."
Kyouya couldn't get over how pale his face looked, "Are you sure? Why don't we get you looked at really quickly?"
"No! I'm fine I promise." Kyouya was taken by surprise by Tamaki's reaction. Tamaki stood up and brushed himself off.
"See I'm fine; we don't have to go anywhere. And I'm catching your lie; you said you would laugh when I got hurt." Tamaki was smiling at him, joking about what Kyouya said.
"It wasn't funny; I didn't really want to see you get hurt. And if you insist on not getting looked at then I'll forget about it."
"I do, come on." Tamaki grabbed Kyouya's hand as he ran past him. He wanted to find something else they could do together.

By the time they got back to Kyouya's house the moon was already high in the sky shinning down.
"It's beautiful tonight don't you think Kyouya. I mean looking at all the stars above us and the moon helping to light the way. It seems almost magical."
"I don't know if it's magical but star gazing has always been fun for me. They seem to hold stories with their light. I know it sounds childish but that's what I've always believed that each star held a story and that's why there were so many, even after I learned how stars were made."
"I don't think it's childish I think it's nice." Tamaki laid back on the back deck and stared up, "I wish I could become a star, so I could look down on all those I love and help guide their way when their lost." He pointed up in the sky between a cluster of stars where there was a dark gap, "That's where I want to be, where there is no star, right there in the middle."
Kyouya didn't say anything back; he just stared up at the night sky. This moment was perfect, the day had been perfect. Now that they both knew how the other felt he knew there would be many moments like this coming.

That night Kyouya laid on his bed and just stared up at the ceiling. Tamaki was sleeping on the pullout sofa in the lower part of his room. He wondered if he was asleep yet or not.
"Kyouya?" He looked over to see Tamaki near the far side of his bed.
"Are you asleep yet?"
He sat up and looked at Tamaki. "Do you need something Tamaki?"
"No, not really I was just wondering if we could you know, cuddle or something. I know it sounds stupid but for some reason I can't get comfortable. I feel like I don't want to be alone, it's partially why I asked to sleep over again." Kyouya wasn't going to force Tamaki to leave earlier though it was nice to finally know why Tamaki sounded like he was ready to beg to stay.
"Come here Tamaki." He pulled the covers back to invite Tamaki in. He climbed under and moved close to Kyouya who then wrapped his arms around him to pull him closer.
"Is this what you wanted?"
"This is perfect, thank you." Tamaki nestled his head against Kyouya's chest and listened to the steady beat of his heart. The sound was calming; soon he had trouble keeping his eyes open.

"Kyouya, I love you." He yawned and snuggled closer. "Never forget, promise me you won't forget."
"I promise, I won't forget."
"Good. Yesterday already made this the best summer ever, though I can't wait to travel with you."
Kyouya watched Tamaki's eyes fight to stay up a little longer only to fail.

"I love you too, Tamaki." Tamaki was already fast asleep; it seemed once again Tamaki didn't hear the words that Kyouya had been trying to get out. Soon Kyouya fell asleep as well. With Tamaki in his arms he was comfortable. This felt right as if Tamaki was made to fit in his arms.

The sun hit Kyouya's eyes; he rolled over in an attempt to block it out. Failing he opened his eyes to see Tamaki still in his arms. He was smiling and curled up as he slept. He gently pushed Tamaki to the other half of the bed so he could get up. As he put his glasses on he heard something going off, a phone vibrating. He looked as his and saw it wasn't even turned on; he looked around for Tamaki's and saw it on the table on the first floor. By the time he got to it the phone went dark but he saw that the caller was Yuzuru, Tamaki should call him back. He probably didn't know that Tamaki spent the night. He walked back up the stairs to wake him so he could call Yuzuru back

"Tamaki, I hate to wake you but your dad called." He looked at the phone as it went off again, Yuzuru must be getting worried. "I think it's urgent, he is calling again."
As he didn't even get any sound from him, he could feel something wash over him. Sitting on the bed he pulled Tamaki to him, he noticed he wasn't breathing Kyouya's hand couldn't stop shaking as he tried to find a pulse.
"Tamaki!" He tried to call for help with Tamaki's phone only to have it slip from his hands due to them shaking so badly. As the phone fell so did the wall of his emotions. He grabbed Tamaki tighter and held on to him afraid to let go. This couldn't be happening, not now. Not when they had just started. He screamed Tamaki's name as every wall broke down inside of him, he brought their faces together and cried, his tears covered the others face.



This was extremely hard to do; I can't even begin to explain it to you. I wasn't even near the end and I was crying already in both writing and typing. This story only happened because while writing Living Our Life I got this horrible thought, After the big fight Tamaki and Kyouya had I thought it would horrible but a twist if I killed Tamaki suddenly. I couldn't do, the thought was too much and that really isn't me but my mind kept expanding the idea and eventually this story was born. I know you hate me, I hate me too.