Hello one and all. As you probably already know, I have recently come to acquire Charlie Sierra's story. I find it quite unfortunate that he decided to quit writing it, but hey, what can you do? So, this is my fourth story, and as of now, I still don't really know where it's headed. As such, your input is greatly appreciated, but updates will not follow any pattern. Also, the first two chapters are pretty much rewrites of Charlie's. Now, let's hope I don't totally fuck this thing up.


Disclaimer: Me no own anything as of yet. Now scroll down.


Konoha. A village associated with peace, serenity, and also great power. A village that had endured years upon years of conflict, both within and outside its great and majestic walls, made up of turmoil, war, and betrayal. Despite all this, the village's shinobi forces had finally managed to once again reestablish its position as number one and prove that it was still a force to be trifled with, no matter the circumstances.

Yes, it would appear to one that Konoha had reached a state of equilibrium.

Deep within the walls of the village, the sound of a fist hitting someone with great force could be heard, followed by a shout of, "Pay attention!" Yes, everything was normal.


In the office of the Hokage, a bandana wearing shinobi glared up at his assailant from his position sprawled out on the floor. He was dressed in a long-sleeved black turtleneck that had an orange strip going up both arms and met in an orange swirl on his back. He also wore black, baggy pants with many pockets that had another orange stripe going up either one of his legs. Along with this attire was a pair of your average black shinobi sandals on his feet. A standard katana was strapped to his back at an angle, its handle poking over his left shoulder.

"What the hell, baa-chan?!?" screamed the shinobi indignantly, rubbing his forehead where a lump was forming, a reminder of the punch he just receive from the blonde woman in front of him. For his trouble, he got a paperweight chucked at his head, sending him to the ground once again with a newly forming bruise.

The thrower was none other than Tsunade, Godaime Hokage of the village. The woman looked down at hit in irritation, eyebrow twitching. "Did you get the message that time? Pay attention… and stop calling me baa-chan!"

The shinobi, known around the village as Naruto, sat up and nursed his wounded head. He was about to make a smart-ass comment, you could just see it on his face, and Tsunade was daring him to do it. However, as he caught sight of all the heavy objects on the desk that could still be thrown at him, he wisely closed his mouth and held his tongue.

Tsunade, satisfaction gleaming in her eyes at the fact that Naruto finally seemed to learn his lesson, sat back in her chair and gestured to the other one laying haphazardly next to the shinobi. "Please, take a seat… again."

Resistant, but not wanting to be hit again, Naruto obliged the request, though not without a little grumbling. Once he was seated, Tsunade continued from where she left off before she smacked the boy in the head. "As I was saying before you decided to let your inner dumbass take over, I have a mission for you." The rather buxom blonde reached under her desk and produced a file, which she handed to the younger blonde. "And before you start bitching, let me reminder you that this is required if you want to keep your jounin status in this village."

Naruto hastily flipped the file open to see its contents. What he found was a picture of him along with a list of his career experience below.

Uzumaki Naruto

Age: 16

Height: 6'1

Weight: 163 lbs.

Rank: Jounin

Special Attributes: Classified

Gennin Team: None

Teaching Experience: None

The rest was pretty much useless and random shit, but he conceded, the file was him in a nutshell. Naruto looked up to meet the Hokage's calm, hazel eyes, confusion and anger shining in his own blue orbs. "What, exactly, do you mean when you say that this is required if I want to keep my status? I mean, seriously, I earned this rank. I stopped Akatsuki from taking over the world, I aided you in the war against Oto, hell, I brought that bastard Sasuke back here, and that's with only a few parts missing! I worked my ass off for this village! What the fuck else am I supposed to do?!?" Naruto was practically yelling by the end of his spiel, and had to stop to catch his breath.

For her part, Tsunade looked unfazed by his indignant speech, and seemed almost bemused, as if she was expecting this to happen. "I totally agree with you." Naruto was about to start shouting again, but was stopped as the Hokage held up a hand. "You have certainly done enough to earn your rank as a jounin, but keeping said rank is another matter entirely. You see," she paused to lean further back in her chair, folding her hands on her lap and crossing her legs, "it's a little known fact that in order to retain one's jounin status, there is a required teaching aspect in order to help the next generation along."

Naruto raised an eyebrow and plastered a quizzical look on his face. "Teaching aspect?"

"That's correct. Every jounin is required to teach at least one team of gennin. However, this option may be substituted if they so choose, and they can instead teach at the academy. You seem to be a special case, though, as you appear to have yet made any notion about thinking about the former option. And I highly doubt you would be willing to teach at the academy, given your own history there. So, that begs the question, what the hell am I supposed to do with some like you?"

Naruto began to sheepishly scratch the back of his head with a nervous grin on his face. "Well, it's just a suggestion, but maybe we could just forget about this whole teaching thing and let me continue on with my life as a jounin. Wouldn't that just save us both a lot of trouble?"

"Nice try, but no. Besides, that was a rhetorical question, as I already have something planned." She once again reached under her desk, this time pulling out a scroll which she quickly handed over to the crestfallen boy. "Since you seem to be determined to continue to be a pain in my ass by denying to teach a gennin team, and would probably break both your own legs before I shipped you off to the academy, I have decided to be merciful and instead give you a mission… one that requires you to teach if you want it completed. You wouldn't want to put your nearly perfect record in jeopardy by failing this simple mission, would you?"

Naruto blanched just at the thought of teaching a bunch of ungrateful little hellions. If the way he had acted in school was anything to go by, his life just got a whole lot more suckish. "C'mon! That's so not fair! Can't we talk about this baa-chan?!?"

He flew back into the wall, causing it to crack, eyes swirling. Tsunade pulled back her steaming fist and sat back down in her chair. "Don't interrupt and don't call me baa-chan. Now, like I was saying, you will take the mission, as it has already been assigned to you, you will complete it exactly to its parameters, and you will thank me for every single minute you are on the mission. There are no what-ifs, there will be no arguments, and this is non-negotiable. Am I understood?"

Peeling himself from the indent of him in the wall, he looked up to the stony visage of his leader, still a bit shaken from the punch. "Um, so, when do I leave?" he asked with false and shaky eagerness.

"Right now."

"Right now? B-but I still need to pack, I need to say goodbye to my friends, I need to water my plants, …"


"…I need to make sure my stove is off, I need to lock my house, I need to take out the trash, …"

"Hey, you done back there? You've been talking to yourself ever since that blonde chick dropped you off nearly half an hour ago."

Naruto stopped ticking things off his 'To Do List' and looked to the unknown individual who spoke. In doing so he realized something… troubling, that being his current surroundings.

He quickly came to the conclusion that he was sitting in some cushy seat inside of a metal room with many windows and seats similar to the one he was currently using, and there was a dull rumble resounding all around him. As he looked out the window, he noticed that trees were moving past him at high speeds. As expected of someone who had never been in an automobile of any sort before, he was promptly freaked out, almost on the verge of hyperventilating. Luckily, his training had taught him to think before acting, so he quickly calmed down and assessed his situation.

He was in a narrow, long, metal room filled with these cushy seats with an empty space down the middle. There was an all-encompassing rumble and he was moving. As he further surveyed his surroundings, he found several bags he recognized as his at his feet. He also noticed the other person in the area with him. It didn't take a genius to figure out it was this man who initially broke him from his reverie.

Naruto averted his eyes to the front to see a man. He was sitting in a taller seat and had a strange wheel in front of him, along with a stick protruding from the floor that the man constantly jostled, making a loud cranking sound above the rumble. He couldn't really judge his appearance since he was facing away from him.

It was then that the unknown man decided to speak up. "Hey, you okay? You look troubled kid."

Naruto shook his, head clearing his thoughts. "Yeah, I'm fine, don't worry about it." it was then that Naruto caught something the man said earlier. "Wait a minute, did you say a blonde woman dropped me off?"

Naruto could see the man incline his head slightly. "Yeah, she up to the bus with you slung over her shoulder like a bag of rocks, still talking, and dropped you off with you bags. You've been listing random things all the way."

Naruto slightly twitched as what was said finally came full circle. 'Damnit baa-chan!' he calmed himself as he sat back and massaged his temples. He could already feel the migraine forming from the thought of all the crap that awaited him.

The man spoke up again. "You might just want to take it easy for a while. We still got quite a drive until we get to our destination."

"And that would be…?" Naruto stopped massaging as he looked once again to the man, leaving the question hanging.

"Where do you think?" he asked without missing a beat. "Youkai Academy, of course."


After some idle chitchat, Naruto had learned that the thing he was riding in was a bus. He committed the word to memory so he wouldn't forget the strange device. It was a little while later when the bus came to a stop. The driver pulled a lever to his right and the doors at the front slid open. "Well, this is where we part ways kid. Good luck, you'll need it."

Naruto gathered his belongings and got off the bus. The first thing he noticed was a scarecrow sporting a pumpkin for a head. It caused him to chuckle a bit, as it reminded him of Kakashi.

'Damn, I already wanna' go back to Konoha, if only to say goodbye to everyone. Okay, need to stop with those kinds of thoughts. I can't change anything now, so I might as well get over it.'

With that, Naruto turned to the dirt path. As he did so, he immediately blanched. Of course he had to go through the creepy dead woods to reach his destination. Crap. With a sigh of frustration, the blonde was on his way.


"Don't tell me I'm lost in the woods. For the love of Kami, don't say I got lost in the damn woods," said Naruto to himself. He had been fine at first, following the path exactly. Of course, it was then that fate had to be a bitch and decide to make the path fork. Ever since that had happened, Naruto had felt he was walking in circles.

As he took another step, he heard a crunch. He looked down to see the fragments of a skull under his foot. A human skull. Now that he looked around, the ground was covered in skulls and tombstones were visible just off the side of the path. Really, could this path get any more fucked up? Of course, the sounds that kept going off in the trees, as if something was watching him, did nothing to quell his growing anxiety levels.

"Yeah, I'm lost. I am so screwed." Regardless, Naruto carried on, not wanting to think what would happen if he stayed in one place for to long, or if he wandered from the path. However, as he walked, the more impatient he got, as his anxiety turned to anger. "Damnit! Where the hell is this frickin' school anyway!"

"Umm, are you okay? You don't seem to well."

Naruto turned his attention away from the sky, or, rather, the thick canopy of dead tree branches, he was yelling at to see who had spoken to him. What he saw made him blush slightly. He was face to face with the cutest woman he had ever laid his eyes on. She had neck length blonde-hair with two tufts sticking out from either side, vaguely resembling a pair of cat ears. Her eyes were squinty, almost as if they were closed, but she didn't seem to have any trouble seeing. She also had on a pair of reading glasses, along with a skirt that ended a little above the knee, and an orange shirt with a small white, jacket over it.

Naruto blushed a bit more when he realized that he was checking her out, and even more so when she put one of her smooth, delicate hands to his forehead. "Hmm, do you have a fever? Maybe I should let the nurse check you out."

Naruto quickly put his hands up and shook his head. "N-no, I'm fine. But maybe you can help me. I'm looking for a place called Youkai Academy. Am I anywhere close to it, by chance?" the woman tilted her head to the side in a confused manner for a moment, and then began to giggle with a slight grin on her face. "What's so funny?" asked Naruto, rubbing the back of his neck.

"You are," was her reply. She then pointed behind her. Naruto followed her hand to see that she was pointing at a large, iron gate. On it, the name 'Youkai Academy' was emblazoned on a sign just above the gate. Naruto just blushed in embarrassment, wondering how the hell he had missed that.

"Wow, wish I had noticed that sooner," he said, still rubbing his neck. The woman just giggled some more.

"You're a strange one. What are you doing here, anyway? The school year doesn't start for two weeks."

"Oh." Naruto began to look through all of his pockets, until he finally produced a few papers. "I'm here to fill in the teaching position. I'm the new Physical Education teacher."

The woman smiled even bigger and wrapped him in a tight hug with strength that probably wasn't possible for a woman of her size. "Oh! So you're Kotsubo-san's replacement? How nice of you to come!"

"Can't… b-breathe… lungs… burn… g-gonna'… p-pass… out…" the woman finally noticed that Naruto had turned a deep shade of purple. She quickly let go as he took in deep gulps of air. He rose from his hands and knees and gave a quick, "Thank you," as he looked to her once again.

She chuckled a bit and now it was her turn to scratch the back of her head. "Sorry… um…" Naruto quickly realized she was looking for a name.

"Uzumaki Naruto," he filled in. "Don't mention it… uhh…"

"Nekonome Shizuka. It's a pleasure to meet you Naruto-chan!" Shizuka said as she eagerly shook his hand. "If you'll follow me, I'll show you around." And with that, she walked through the gates to the academy. Naruto grumbled a bit at being called 'Naruto-chan' but flowed nonetheless.


Both blondes were walking through the seemingly abandoned halls of Youkai Academy, chatting animatedly. "So, what's with the creepy-ass woods around here? Last time I checked, that wasn't exactly good for morale," asked Naruto.

"Well, this school has to be hidden like this, so no one just wanders in here. Because, really, what sane person would walk into a place like this? The barrier around the school offers extra protection so a human doesn't end up in the middle of a bunch of youkai." Naruto was wondering what she meant by barrier and why she referred to people as plain humans. It all seemed to click in his head when she said that this place was full of youkai. Of course, given the name, it probably should have been obvious.

"So, what do you do if you find a human?" asked Naruto, a bit nervous and sweating.

"Oh, we eliminate them. They can't leave with the secret of this place after all," she said nonchalantly. "Of course, people would probably think that the person is crazy, but we can't risk it."

In his head, Naruto was running through escape plans so he could leave at a moments notice. His companion seemed to notice his discomfort and put him at ease.

"Don't worry. Shinobi aren't seen as true humans. They're more like witches, being boundary beings."

"How did you now I was a shinobi?"

"We were all informed that you would be one. I myself am a Neko youkai."

"I see." It was at that point that he finally noticed the tail swishing behind her. He was memorized by it, but snapped out of it, since she might think he was starring at something else if she caught him. However, it was hard to ignore. More talking would help him, he decided. "Hey, Nekonome-san…"

"Please, call me Shizuka. There's no need to be so formal, considering we are equals now," she interrupted. Naruto just blinked a bit before grinning.

"Okay, Shizuka-chan. I was just wondering, what happened to this Kotsubo-san?"

Shizuka suddenly stopped walking and Naruto idly wondered if he had said something wrong. However, his fears were put to rest when, instead of an angry of sad look on her face, there was one of awkwardness. She scratched her cheek and said, "Well, let's just say that Kotsubo-san had some… vices that weren't entirely legal."


"C'mon, I swear there was no ulterior motive! I just asked her over for a simple cup of coffee!"

"First off, what ten-year-old do you know that drinks coffee, honestly?"

"Umm… this one?"

"Riiiight, and that's why we found a box of condoms, a bunch of roofies, and several magazines filled with young girls in suggestive positions signed by some… 'Pedobear' in this bag of yours."

There was silence.

"That's what I thought."


Naruto sweat dropped and decided that it was probably better not to ask. So, the two considered in relative quiet, the only sound being that of their footsteps. Finally, they arrived at their destination, a door marked 'Headmaster'. Shizuka turned to him and said a few parting words. "Now remember, Naruto-chan, be respectful at all times and always refer to him as Headmaster."

Naruto nodded in understanding. "So, will I be seeing you around?"

Shizuka giggled and pinched his cheek, much to his embarrassment. "Of course you will, Naruto-chan! We are fellow teachers, after all!" and with that, she turned on her heel and walked away, tail swishing behind her.

Despite himself, Naruto smiled a wide smile. He was already starting to like this place, just because of her.

However, remembering the task he was now faced with, he turned serious. He turned around and silently and respectfully opened the door.

The moment he entered the dark room, he was overwhelmed by a feeling of power and authority. To him, it was quite obvious that the Headmaster wasn't someone he wanted to fuck with. So, all business, he stood in front of the desk that was in the back of the room and eyed the individual behind it, waiting to be acknowledged.

The man seemed to resemble a priest of high standing. However, the slightly sinister feel in the air quickly cast that thought from Naruto's head. As he looked again, he noticed the grand rosary around his neck. He knew this was serious, and that it wasn't a time to mess around.

After a few more seconds of silence, the Headmaster spoke. "Welcome to Youkai Academy, Uzumaki Naruto."

Naruto gave a deep bow as he responded. "Thank you, Headmaster." Naruto wondered how this man knew his name, but, really, that didn't matter at the moment. He instead waited for the Headmaster to continue.

There was a quiet chuckle. "Please, Uzumaki-san, no need to be so respectful. As for how I know your name, I'm the one who requested the mission."

Naruto's eyebrows shot up above his hairline in surprise. "How did you know I wanted to ask that?"

The Headmaster just chuckled and continued. "As I'm sure your fully aware, you are here as the new P.E. teacher until we can find another suitable replacement. Hopefully you don't posses the same vices as Kotsubo-san had. A warning glance caused Naruto to straighten his posture and remind himself not to screw this up. Maybe the fact the Headmaster's eyes were glowing white was the cause of this.

The Headmaster leaned back into his chair as his eyes were once again covered in the shadow of his hood. "Well, I don't believe that there is anything else we need to speak about. You are free to do whatever you wish for the next two weeks. Explore the campus, relax in the teacher's lounge, what ever you wish. Good luck, Uzumaki-san."

Naruto nodded and gave a bow before he exited the room. The moment he was out of the Headmaster's gaze, he slouched and let out the breath he didn't know he was holding. Wiping his forehead of sweat that may have collected there, Naruto decided that his time here was going to be interesting


And there you go. I wanted to get this out sooner, but for some reason, my computer won't let me just copy documents. I'll get it checked out eventually, but not now.

So yeah, I started writing this about a month ago, but somehow got sidetracked. I should get the second chapter out soon, but not now. I'm still not far enough to know how I'll do on this, so wish me luck in the future. This chapter was 3,937 words long.