A/N: Okay, this is my first fanfic, so please go a little easy! Set one year after Ziva killed Ari. Only she and Gibbs knows.. Read and Review!

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS):

Ziva David walked through the elevator doors to her desk almost a half an hour late. Biggs was in MTAC with Director Shepard, and McGee was down in the forensics lab with Abby. Tony DiNozzo was reclining in his chair, but sat up when he saw Ziva.

"Hey, Zee-vah, you do realize you're late and Gibbs is gonna kill you, right?" Tony smirked. Ziva, very sad, just looked at him and sat at her desk. She sighed and replied,

"Tony I am not in the mood today for your antics. Please, buzz off, yes?'

Tony looked at her with a hint of concern in his playful green eyes. She stared right back, but her deep brown eyes lacked the light that was currently present in them. She got started on her paperwork slowly, as if in a daze. Tony, well, was Tony, playing Tetris on his cell phone while spinning around. However, with each rotation, he would glance over at Ziva. Eventually, she gave up on paperwork, and he stopped spinning and settled for staring at her. Ziva didn't seem to notice. She was looking down at her desk, thinking of that day exactly one year ago. The day she killed her half-brother, Ari, to save Gibbs.

"Grab your gear, we got a dead Marine," Gibbs barked at them. Ziva looked up, her eyes slightly red. McGee came in to grab his things from his desk and did a double take. He noticed Ziva, but didn't say anything after a look from his boss. After a minute, they were on their way to yet another crime scene.

Tony shut the engine of the car off and looked over at his partner, who was sitting unmoving looking down. He got out and opened the passenger door for Ziva. Trying to make her smile, Tony grinned his signature DiNozzo grin and exclaimed,

"After you, m'lady." Ziva finally looked up, and got out with a quiet "thank you" in Tony's direction. As she walked away, Tony felt the smile slip off his face. In it's place, there was a lot of puzzlement. Surely, something was really wrong. His partner was not acting her usual ninja-assassin self. Tony told himself he was going to figure out the mysterious liaison officer.

Gibbs sighed. He remembered this day as clearly as Ziva does. She killed her half-brother to save his life. No, the reports weren't right; Gibbs didn't shoot him. He understood how Ziva felt; alone, guilty, depressed, anguished. Gibbs walked through the door to the home where the Marine was shot. As he moved toward the body, he noticed the Marine was lying on his back, the bullet penetrating the skull on the forehead. The Marine had dark hair and tanned skin, most likely of Italian descent. Gibbs heard a quiet gasp behind him, and turned to find Ziva looking at the body.

Ziva gasped as she walked into the crime scene. The man lying there had looked somewhat like Ari. He even had been shot in the head like Ari. Ziva looked into the dead Marine's still opened, shocked eyes, and remembered that day in Gibbs' basement. She closed her eyes and felt Gibbs looking at her with his baby blue ones.

Tony watched curiously as Ziva stopped head in her tracks. Gibbs was looking at her, concern in his eyes that was almost tangible. Tony had no idea why, but he came to stand by her. He noticed a tear streak down her face, and she looked as though she was struggling to maintain control. Gibbs walked over and placed his hand on her shoulder.

"DiNozzo, take her out of her. McGee and I can handle this."

"But Boss, what's wrong with her?"

"Tony, it's not my place to tell you. Maybe she will, but don't get your hopes up. Now, go."

Tony wrapped a gentle arm around Ziva, and led her back to his car. By this time, she had her eyes open and was shaking so hard that she couldn't see straight. She sat in the passenger seat and fumbled with the seatbelt. Tony reached over and buckled it for her. She looked down and felt more tears trickle down, and closed her eyes again. She just couldn't get the flashbacks of that day and the image of the dead Marine out of her head. Tony started the car, and they rode off in silence toward his apartment. The car was quiet, except for the occasional sniffle from Ziva. Just as before, Tony got out and opened the door for Ziva. This time, though, he put his arm back around her shoulders and murmured,

"Come on, Ziva, let's go inside before it starts raining harder." As he said this, the rain that had been drizzling down started pouring. Ziva allowed him to help her out of the car and lead her to his apartment. They were both soaked by the time they made it to the entryway. Ziva, now shaking from the cold rain as well as the pent up emotions, stood still in the doorway to Tony's apartment. With a quick "be right back," Tony ran towards his room. A few minutes later, dressed in jeans and an Ohio State tee-shirt, he ran out handing a pair of sweatpants and an Ohio State tee-shirt to Ziva.

"Zi, you go take a hot shower and change. I don't want you getting sick."

"No, thank you Tony. I am fine," she replied in a monotonic voice.

"Then at least change, please.." Tony pleaded, with a puppy dog look on his face. She grabbed the clothes and walked mechanically into Tony's bedroom. Tony went into the kitchen and started coffee for him, tea for her. She came out a few minutes later , hair still damp. Ziva's eyes were glassy, as if she was holding back tears. She came beside Tony, and looked down.

"Ziva, it's OK to cry. Look at me," he told her. She looked up and met his deep eyes, that for once had no trace of humor. That's when she lost it. As the tears started falling, Tony grabbed her and pulled her to him. She leaned her head on his chest, and choked on the sobs that kept coming. Tony rubbed her back with one hand, and ran the other through her hair. He felt his heart break a little more with each sob that tore through her. Her tears soaked through his shirt, but he could care less.

Tony led Ziva to the couch and sat her down, still holding on. Ziva was shaking, hard. She pulled herself closer to Tony. He was extremely worried; never had Tony seen her like this, broken, and he still had no idea why she was like this. He never said a word as he held her, rubbing her back and rocking her. He did know, however, that she had all of these feeling pent up inside her that need needed to be released after so many years without showing emotion. After what seemed like and eternity, the sobs turned to hiccups, the tears slowed. Ziva looked up at Tony, and gave him a small, teary smile.

"Thank you, Tony," she whispered. He looked down and smiled back softly.

"Anytime, sweet cheeks," he let the smile slip off his face, "Care to explain what's wrong, though?" Ziva sighed. She knew he would ask, and it was the least she could do. He's always been there for her, whether it was making her laugh, or comforting her, like he was doing.

"Today marks the anniversary of one year ago, when Ari died." Tony's face suddenly turned dark.

"What, did you fall in love with him? He KILLED my partner, Ziva. If anything, this would be a day for celebration!" He growled. Ziva looked down.

"Yes, I did love him, as a brother and I killed him."

"What are you talking about? Plus, Gibbs is the one who killed that bastard."

"No… Ari was my.. b-brother… and.. I.. k-killed him to save Gibbs!" Ziva wailed out between sobs. Tony felt a twist of guilt at his behavior, pulled her back into his arms, and continued on rocking her and rubbing her back. Eventually, she fell asleep in his arms. Tony carried her into his room, pulled off her shoes, and tucked her in. as he turned to leave, he felt a hand place a weak hold on his arm.

"Stay with me, please," Ziva said sleepily. Tony went over to the other side. Took off his shoes and jeans, and crawled in beside her. She scooted closer to him. He wiped the remaining wet tears and wrapped an arm around her waist, while she did the same thing, leaning her head on his chest. The two of them fell asleep quickly, peacefully.

A/N: Well, how was it? Please review!