Written for "Conversations with the hat challenge" by Maraudercat

The conditions were that the piece should be all "dialogue". That is, only the direct 'thought conversation' between the hat is included. No "he felt-" or "she wished-", etc. Also the piece should start with "Surname, First name" of the student being called, and end with the hat declaring their house.

"Brown, Lavender"

Brown ehh? I haven't heard that name in ages.

Maybe that's because my dad is muggle-born. Got a shock when I got the letter. Mum had never told him she was a witch.

Well that explains it. You don't have an ounce of loyalty or intelligence so Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff is out. Ambition is there, but not enough. You can't plot to save your life.

Does that mean I will be a Gryffindor? Mum will be really happy. Oh and so would Aunt Helia. Mum was a Ravenclaw you know. But she told me she wouldn't mind me getting into any house. But I didn't want to get into Hufflepuff anyways. On the train ride, I was told there are a bunch of duffers.

Girl, stop. You talk too much. I never said I am putting you in Gryffindor. I could put you in Hufflepuff you know. Maybe those loyal flocks would teach you a thing or a two about themselves.

But you would not do that would you? Because you always put people where they belong. And I don't belong in Hufflepuff as you just told me. Oh I can't wait to go to my dorm and meet my dorm mates. I need to tell someone that on the train, I saw a red-haired Gryffindor guy who was wearing a prefect badge, you there are loads of red-hair guys here, was making out with a Ravenclaw girl.

Lord, only gods help those people you will be sharing a dorm with. I hope you learn to shut up in...