On the Road in Gondor
by SkyFire

Disclaimer: Not mine, wish they were.

A/N: 1)This was inspired by yet another plot spawned by the beta version of my 4th generation LotR
plotbunny generator. I mean really. How could you possibly go wrong with a plot like: "Merry
gets turned into a talking rock that likes eating lunch in Gondor?" *g*

2)Warning!: This contains judicious use of that phrase most feared on long road-trips. You know
the one I mean. *g*

Please review! *g*

On the Road in Gondor
by SkyFire

"Are we *there* yet?"

"No, Merry, we're not there yet," came the somewhat frustrated reply. "Why are you in such a

"I'm hungry," came the response, "and there's this inn I know in Minas Tirith that makes the most
delicious food, all cooked up just right-"


"-nice spiced potatoes and-"


"-grilled steaks and crispy bacon and-"

"Merry." Somewhat louder now, and exasperated.

"-a good *whole* pint, or maybe even two, and-"

"Merry!" A loud shout.

"Yes, Pippin? Are we there *now*?"

"No, we're *not* there now," Pippin answered. "And it won't matter to you now, anyway."

"But I'm *hungry*!"

"Merry, you *can't* be hungry. Or did you forget somehow that Gandalf turned you into a talking
*rock* because you peeked into his pouches one too many times?"

"Of course I didn't forget!" said Merry, the talking rock. "But I'm still hungry."

Pippin stared in disbelief at the smooth, egg-shaped gray stone he held.

Anyone passing by would probably thought the poor hobbit insane for arguing with a stone about
food... then thought *themselves* insane as the stone argued back at him.

He shook his head, then started walking again.

It was quiet for perhaps five minutes, during which time Pippin could actually enjoy the walk. A
few more hours and he would be able to see Minas Tirith in the distance. A few more hours after
*that* and chances are he would be happily eating in Strider's palace. The thought alone made
him smile in anticipation.

The quiet was just too good to last.

"So..." came Merry's voice from the rock. "Are we there yet?"

Pippin sighed in exasperation. Then inspiration struck.

He stopped walking, took off his pack and opened it.

Then he shoved the Merry-rock down into it, way down to the bottom, where the questioning voice
was thankfully muffled. He closed his pack, shouldered it once more.

Pippin started walking once again, started to whistle softly as he did. The occasional muffled
noise that came from his pack was easy to ignore.

It really *was* turning into a beautiful day after all.


*g* So, what did you think? Let me know! Click the button and leave a review!!