Title: Please Stop Eating the Hell Butterflies
Author: Mistress Nika
Summary: A missive to the Gotei 13 from Yamamoto-sotaicho
Pairings: nothing serious
Warnings: absolute crack
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.
Notes: Each chapter will probably only be somewhere around two or three hundred words.
It was the opinion of the sotaicho that, as a deterrent to objectionable behavior, a little public humiliation went a long way. Of course, he couldn't call it that. Instead, he called them gentle reminders of what was not acceptable and displayed each person's wrongdoing for all the Gotei 13 to see. After all, if one person made the mistake of eating in a meeting and he publicly reprimanded them, others would surely realize they shouldn't do it either.
This led to the creation of a list of guidelines, posted in each division and updated once a day. Early in the morning, a lone shinigami would make the rounds, tacking up that day's additions to the ever growing list.
Ironically, this was less of a deterrent and more of a source of amusement and gossip. Each morning, the first thing many shinigami did was check the bulletin board for updates.
Some even took it as a challenge and had a bet going to see who could get the most outlandish, extravagant, downright absurd rule about themselves posted without getting in any real trouble.
Unsurprisingly, Kurotsuchi Mayuri was winning.
He wasn't even aware of the bet.