Title: Secret Admirer

Author: forsaken2003

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: I own none, all belong to Joss Whedon
Comments: Always welcomed!

Summary: Xander has a secret admirer… (We all know who it is though don't we? Lol)

Warnings/Spoilers: None

Beta'd by: Dragonfly_64

Part One

Xander sighed as he reached the basement. God how he hated living in his parents basement, on top of that it was four days until Valentine's Day and that seemed like the worst time of year in the Harris household. His mom and dad would argue more than usual about how the other one ruined their lives and that they only reason they got married was because of their loser son.

Dropping his keys to his misshapen coffee table he paused when he saw four boxes of Twinkies. "I didn't buy these," Xander said and noticed a note on the top box.


Four days until Valentine's Day. Enjoy your treats.



"Huh…" Xander set the note back down and ripped into the first box. "At least I have dinner.

The girls were giggling when Xander walked into Giles's place. He vaguely heard Giles mutter about locking the door.

"Hello, lovely ladies and handsome ex-watcher man." Xander greeted with a smile on his face.

"You're in an awfully good mood today, Xander," Giles stated looking up from some dusty old book. Ah, some light reading.

Xander pulled out the note he found earlier, "So which one of you is crushing on the Xan-man?" He looked at Giles, "It's not you, is it? I like you as a friend and all but ick!" Xander shuddered.

With a roll of his eyes Giles went back to his book not even bothering with a response.

"It wasn't me," Willow said. "I got you a cute little card with a puppy and a kitten on it saying 'Happy Valentine's Day Buddy." Willow explained excitedly before frowning, "Now I ruined the surprise!"

Xander smiled at his friend, "I'll act surprised when I open it."

"It wasn't me either," Buffy answered. "I got you all chocolate."

"Oh, chocolate!" Xander replied thrilled with the thought.

"Valentine's Day is for pathetic humans who feel like they need to buy their significant others something because they're afraid if they don't they'll get dumped." Spike explained when he walked in.

Buffy huffed, "Says the loser vampire who couldn't keep his crazy sire."

"Buffy," Xander stared angrily at her. "We've all had bad Valentine's Days at one point or another." He didn't know why he just stood up for Spike, probably because of the spell he did in high school was still stuck in his head. By the look Giles gave him he still wasn't completely forgiven either.

"Whatever," Buffy replied. Her heart still mending from Angel leaving, "Why are you even here, Spike?"

"I'm out of cash and I need blood and ciggies," Spike clarified before turning to Giles. "Got anything that needs to be killed?"

"Just standard patrol I'm afraid." Giles replied than thought for a moment. "I'm sure Buffy would appreciate you taking half the work load though."

Buffy perked right up, "Riley wanted to go to the movies."

"There you go, you patrol half the town and I'll pay you seventy-five dollars, deal?" Giles requested.

"Bloody hell," Spike muttered. "Deal but I get dopey. At least that way I'll be guaranteed some violence."

Willow bit her lip, "I don't know if that's a good idea, he could get hurt."

"No way are you taking Xander," Buffy ordered. "You're a big bad vamp you don't need back up," She mocked him.

"Excuse me, can I decide if I want to patrol or not?" Xander asked obviously annoyed. "I am perfectly capable of going to patrol and if it draws out more demons for Spike to kill than it's more demons we don't need to worry about later." He looked at Spike. "Let's go not all of us have all night you know."

Part Two

Xander woke up the next day with a kink in his back. There had been a couple of Soraz'ee demons and while Spike took on the bigger of the two, it decided to try and drive Xander's body into the ground. It dug its foot into his back, if Spike had waited a few more seconds and his spine would have been snapped in two.

Knowing there was no way he'd be able to stand all day taking orders at the Double Meat Palace. Reaching over to find the phone his hand connected with something else.

Xander grabbed it for a closer inspection. Three hurricane chocolate bars were tied together with a red ribbon. Another note was with it.


Curious yet?



He looked between the note and the chocolate completely confused, "What the hell is going on?"

Xander was jarred awake by a knock on the basement door. Turning his head he realised it was just after eight in the evening. "Shit," He cursed to himself. Another knock came. "Who is it?" Xander yelled not getting out of bed if he didn't need to.

"Pizza Palace, I've got your large all meat with extra cheese."

"What?" Xander tossed the covers off his body and slowly made his way to the door. "Look buddy, I didn't order a pizza." He explained when he opened the door.

"I don't know what to tell you. Someone came in and ordered it, told us to deliver it here. It's already paid for…" The kid answered. "Oh and they asked this get dropped off as well," He handed over a folded piece of paper.

Xander grabbed the note and pizza before slamming the door in the delivery boy's face. He set the pizza down his full attention on the paper in his hand.


I thought you'd be hungry. Enjoy your dinner. See you soon.



Carefully he opened the box preparing himself to be attacked. The smell of the meat made him salivate. Pulling a piece out he watched the stringy cheese fall back into the box. With a slice of pizza in his mouth he carried the box to the bed, figuring he better call and let the others know he wouldn't be there.

The phone rang three times before the answering machine kicked in. "Hey guys, you're probably already out doing patrol. There was some trouble last night. Don't worry, Spike took care of it. I'll be around tomorrow."

Xander polished off the rest of his pizza then decided to take a hot shower hoping to help ease his sore muscles. He needed to be back to work tomorrow. The rest of the night he thought about his admirer. Who was it?

Part Three

Xander was pissed off; this whole secret admirer thing had been fun. Having someone's attention directed at him was nice. With all his past encounters with women who liked to give him attention he shouldn't have been shocked when it turned bad.

He stormed into Giles's apartment startling all of them including Spike who was lying on the couch watching some stupid soap. "Who was it?" He demanded glaring at his friends.

"Did what?" Buffy asked, she only seen Xander this mad twice before. When Willow was taken to raise the master after Buffy killed him and when he discovered Angel was back from hell.

Xander slammed down the two figurines. Two clowns that looked like they were juggling, he looked to see all his friends eyes were wide, "Tell me one of you did it."

"Xander, we know you hate clowns," Willow was the first to speak. "This is as cruel as someone giving me a stuffed frog."

"What's the big deal with clowns?" Spike asked muting the television.

Xander shuddered and pushed the figurines as far away from him as possible, "They're scary."

Spike snorted at that, "What's so bloody scary about them?"

"How about them chasing you down the hall of the high school with a knife in its hand for starters?" Xander replied shaking slightly.

Spike's eyebrows shot up, "Only on the bloody hell mouth."

"Do you believe this is from your secret admirer?" Giles questioned picking up one of the clowns examining it.

"I have no doubt," Xander pulled out a slip of paper.





Willow bit her lip, "I don't think you should stay at your place tonight. Whoever it is has access and can slip in without waking you up."

"You'll stay at my mom's place; I'll stay in my old room. If anything happens I'll be there," Buffy promised. She wasn't about to let anyone hurt her friend.

"Thanks," Xander tried to smile. "Why can't I ever attract someone that doesn't want to torture me?"

"Maybe they didn't know you were so afraid of them?" Everyone started at Spike. "What? Bloody hell, it's a good reason!"

Giles cleared his throat, "It pains me to say this but Spike has a point."

Xander didn't look too convinced. "I'm in the mood for some beer and loud music. Who wants to go to the Bronze?"

"I'd love to but I have to study for exams," Willow said standing and grabbing her bag.

"I have to patrol, and I don't think it's a good idea for you to be out. We don't know who this person… or demon is or what they want." Buffy answered, concerned for her friends safety. "Maybe you should hold off until we find out who it is."

"I'm going to find out sooner or later. I can't be a coward and hide until we find out. I've faced the end of the world I can handle a stalker," Xander assured his friends.

"And if it's a demon?" Buffy asked.

Xander tried not to look worried. "Than you kick its ass and I give up dating all together," Xander answered. "But until than I am bronzing it."

"I'm planning on going to get a pint, I'll keep an eye out on the boy," Spike offered again making everyone stare at him.

"And just why would you do that?" Buffy asked crossing her arms looking at him suspiciously.

"Need more cash don't I? Seventy-five dollars doesn't go far you know." Spike retorted glaring at Giles.

With a sigh, Giles pulled out forty dollars, "This should suffice for drinks at the Bronze and a pack of smokes."

Spike snatched the bills out of Giles's hand, "Come on, whelp, I've got a beer with my name on it."

Xander nursed the beer that he had been able to bribe Spike into buying for him since he forgot his fake I.D. He now sat in a back corner with Spike his eyes shifting around the room.

"If you're that bloody scared, why'd you come here?" Spike asked after watching Xander jump every time someone came close to their table.

"I'm not," Xander denied blushing with embarrassment. "Is it that noticeable?"

Spike shrugged, "Only to me since you keep knocking the table around. We use to be closer to the wall." He pointed out.

"I am such a loser," Xander muttered to himself but Spike caught the words. "I was actually really excited about meeting this person. They seemed genuinely concerned about me. I mean they bought me pizza!"

"Look, Xander," Spike started becoming flustered. "I have to tell you something."

Xander looked at Spike, "Oh god, don't tell me."

Spike nodded, "Afraid so."

"There's a demon, is it looking at me? Does it look like it's going to kill me?" Xander asked before his head swung around looking for the demon.

"What? No there isn't a demon… besides me that is," Spike answered. "No it's about your secret admirer."

"What about them?" Xander asked.

Spike took a swig of his beer, "I know who it is."

"You do?" Xander gazed at Spike. "Why didn't you say anything? You want money don't you?" He pulled out his wallet, "I only have a ten."

"I don't want your bloody money," Spike glowered.

"What do you want than?" Xander asked looking confused as he put his wallet in his back pocket.

"Nothing, you git," Spike answered. "I'm going to tell you for free."

Xander now looked wary, "Why?"

"Because I hate seeing you like this," Spike answered honestly. "I thought I was doing well on being nice to you and apparently I didn't do enough research on the sodding clowns."

"Wait… what? Are you telling me you're my stalker?" Xander's eyebrows flew up.

"Not stalker, I don't follow you everywhere… not all the time anyways." Spike answered. "And yes, those things were all from me."

Xander looked confused trying to figure out what was going on, "Why?"

"Don't know," Spike shrugged peeling the label off his beer. "I like you."

"You like me?" Xander repeated, "But you hate me. I'm the enemy remember?"

"You're not the enemy; the slayer is but not you." Spike looked up, "You're different from the lot."

Still looking confused, "No I'm not."

"You are," Spike insisted. "You don't act like it's a big inconvenience when I'm around. You're not pleased when I'm around but you haven't thrown my problem back in my face since I've shown up."

"Neither has Willow," Xander added. "What about the clowns?"

"Like I said, I didn't do the proper research. I didn't think you'd be scared of them. I figured you didn't have the best childhood do I'd give you something childlike." Spike explained.

Taking another sip of his beer Xander tried to figure out why he wasn't freaked out and running to Buffy demanding for her to kill Spike. "How do you know about my childhood?"

"Lived with you for a bit didn't I? I was stuck in that basement and could hear your parents," Spike snorted at the word. "I think you were adopted."

"Yeah me too," Xander agreed. "So you want to date?"

Spike cringed at the word, "Vampires don't date."

"Than what is it that you want?" Xander asked going back to confusion.

"You, bloody hell I'm a pounce." Spike shook his head. "Forget I said anything." He stood from the table and made his way out of the club.

Part Four

Valentine's Day came and went before Xander got up the nerve to go see Spike. The vampire hadn't been to Giles' to see about any demons or for blood which had him concerned. Taking a deep breath he pushed the door open just enough to slide inside. It turned out he was a coward because he made sure he came when the sun was up, in case he was humiliated and Spike couldn't chase after him.

"What are you doing here?" Spike asked as he climbed up from the lower level. He wore only jeans that weren't buttoned up.

"I wanted to talk." Xander said licking his lips, "About the other night."

Spike walked over to his miniature fridge for blood, "Nothing to talk about."

"Did you mean it?" Xander blurted out.

"No," Spike answered not bothering to look at Xander.

"No?" Xander asked disappointed with the answer.

Spike ripped into the blood bag drinking it cold, "Yeah, no."

"Why did you say you liked me than?" Xander requested, needing to know.

"It's kind of obvious isn't it?" Spike replied. "You're the gullible one of the bunch."

"Oh…" Xander said his shoulder slumping.

Spike snorted, "I can't believe you actually thought I'd want you. I could have my way with anyone in this god forsaken town. I wouldn't waste my time on the likes of you."

Xander turned to leave; it was smart of him to come in the day time. He wasn't going to live this down anytime soon. When he got to the door he was surprised to be pulled back. "Wha…"

"Sod it," Spike declared and kissed Xander. He decided it wasn't worth lying and putting that look on Xander's face. He wanted to protect himself but protect Xander at the same time.

"You are a complicated vampire," Xander decided when the kiss broke.

Spike chuckled at the statement before becoming serious. "I want you, pet. Anyway I can have you."

"I'm not jumping into bed with you," Xander informed him. "Not yet anyways. I have to admit it's weird having a vampire want to take care of me."

"Tell me about it; it's weird that I want to take care of a human!" Spike answered, "I'm supposed to want to kill them."

Xander bounced his foot trying to figure out what to say, "We missed Valentine's Day."

"It's overrated." Spike replied casually.

"Yeah," Xander agreed. "Maybe we could go out for a beer at Willy's?"

"Suppose we could," Spike lit a smoke. "You're paying, you owe me a beer."

"You could also get some violence in," Xander added with a smile. "You're kind of hot when you fight."

Spike cocked an eyebrow, "Like watching me fight, eh?"

"You're all graceful. I wish I was like that." Xander replied looking embarrassed.

"You could," Spike said. "Some training and you could be able to handle your own. I don't see what the bloody watcher hasn't taken his time to train you."

Xander shrugged, trying to ignore the butterflies in his stomach. Training would mean touching, did he want touching? Duh stupid question! "Buffy is his charge not me."

"You're helping the fight the least he could do is help you get better at it. Don't matter none now though. I'll teach you right and proper." Spike responded with a purr.

"Beer now, talking about kicking my ass later," Xander laughed.

"I'll kiss you better," Spike assured making Xander swallow hard.

"Kissing is of the good," Xander squeaked out looking at Spike's pouty lips.

With a smirk Spike kissed Xander again. "Still too sunny for me, you want to stay and watch the telly?"

"Nuh," Xander declined though he did want to. "You need your vamp nap. I'll come back later and then we can head over to Willy's."

"You gonna tell your friends who your secret admirer is?" Spike asked changing the subject.

"I probably should or they won't let me out of their sight." Xander answered, "I have no doubt they'll have a big problem with it but," He shrugged. "They'll deal. Besides they can't get mad because technically we're not dating, like you said vampires don't date, right?"

Spike laughed at Xander, "clever pet."

Xander grinned, "I can be sneaky."

"I'm starting to realise that," Spike pulled Xander closer. "You best go before I decide you shouldn't."

Xander eyes widened when he felt Spike's hardness. He did that, he couldn't help but be giddy that he caused it, "I'll see you tonight than." One more kiss and he left, looking forward to seeing Spike again. Maybe he could get Spike to teach him how to play poker. The vampire mentioned poker games going on at the demon bar. If he was going to start hanging out with Spike he'd need to take up some of his interests. Fighting and poker was a good start.

The End