It was almost six o'clock in the evening on the Friday night a week before regionals and New Directions was hard at work in the choir room where they'd been held up since school let out at two. Well, they had been hard at work anyway, but then Santana walked directly in front of Rachel one too many times during their second dance number and sent her into a total diva tizzy.
"Mr. Schuester, she's blocking my face from the audience and she's doing in purposefully." Rachel cried dramatically, stomping her foot for added effect.
Santana looked at Mr. Schue and shrugged innocently, "I'm just doing the audience a favor."
Rachel shot Santana a look that could have killed and Kurt was convinced she was going to grab the Latina's ponytail. He was on the edge of his seat hoping for a good catfight when the four waters he'd consumed over the course of the afternoon caught up with him and he realized he had to pee really bad. He excused himself and headed for the bathroom, but not before instructing Mercedes and Artie to use their phones to record the fight if it happened. As he walked, he whistled the song "One" from A Chorus Line to distract himself from how bad he actually had to pee. He was whistling so loud that he almost didn't hear the soft cries coming from the girl's bathroom.
"Hello?" Kurt called, slowly pushing the door open and sticking his head in.
"Kurt," the voice was pained, but he recognized it immediately as Quinn's. He wondered to himself how he'd managed to not notice that she'd left Glee practice because between her mood swings and gigantic belly she was sort of impossible to miss.
"Oh, my God," he muttered when he saw her. She was leaning heavily against the wall as she massaged her abdomen with her hands, her face pale and sweaty. He looked down long enough to see that there was a trickle of fluid running down the inside of her legs and pooling beneath her. "What the hell?"
"I think she's coming," Quinn panted.
"Yes," Quinn nodded but then her face crumpled and she doubled over in tears. Kurt didn't know what else to do, so he walked to her side and rubbed her back until the contraction finished.
"Come on, you need to lie down." He said, taking her hand and trying to lead her to the couch that was situated in the corner of the bathroom.
The mere thought of walking drove Quinn to a whole new realm of panic and she shook her head, "I can't move."
"Yes, you can."
Quinn shook her head again and pulled her hand from his, "it feels like she's right between my knees."
The mental image made Kurt's nauseous and also made him wonder what Quinn's definition of 'now' was. Did she mean now as in "I'm having contractions so we need to go to the hospital now," or "I'm about to become another high school cliché and give birth to my baby in the bathroom now."? "Come on, Quinn," he said it more sternly this time because he suddenly sensed the urgency of the situation. He draped her arm around his shoulder and then wrapped his arm tightly around her lower back so he could support her, "Tiny baby steps, I'll help you."
"Alright," Quinn agreed. With each step she winced and dug her nails further and further into Kurt's shoulder, but they made it to the couch and Kurt held her hands tightly as she awkwardly maneuvered herself down to a sitting position.
"Okay?" Kurt asked and she shook her head furiously.
"It hurts too bad to sit," she cried, trying to use his hands to pull herself back up off the couch. "There's so much pressure."
Kurt knew very little about birth, but he knew at least enough to know that standing was not a good idea, "lie back then." He put one hand behind her head and one behind her knees and helped her lie down on the couch before she could protest that idea as well.
"I'm going to go get some help," Kurt told her gently once she was lying back. "I'll be right back."
"NO," Quinn yelled, grabbing for his hand, "please don't leave me alone."
"I have to, Quinn." She looked terrified, so he stroked the back of her hand with his thumb. "I'm just going to run to the choir room…" Quinn's grip on his hand tightened and he watched her whole body tense as she was hit hard with another contraction. He tentatively reached down with his free hand and rubbed her belly as he'd seen her do earlier in an attempt to offer her some relief. She looked like she wanted to crawl out of her own skin and Kurt wondered why anyone would ever choose to put themselves through as much pain as Quinn was experiencing at the moment.
"God" Quinn moaned as her contraction ended. "It really feels like she's right there. You have to look."
Kurt stared at her in disbelief "You want me to look at what?"
"Someone in this room is going to have to look and it can't be me."
"Which is why I'm going to go get help. Look, Quinn, I'm neither a girl nor a straight guy so I have no experience with vaginas. I've never seen one and I certainly don't have one. You'll be better off with just about anyone else from Glee club helping you, including Brittany."
Hearing Kurt say the word vagina made Quinn smirk and for a brief and fleeting second, she forgot that she was giving birth. She was quickly reminded by the burning between her legs. "Listen, Hummel," she hissed, grabbing him by his shirt collar and pulling his face close to hers, "you're not leaving me alone in this bathroom to give birth on this couch all by myself like somebody's damn dog."
"Fine," Kurt agreed because the combination of Quinn's pregnancy hormones and labor was making her terrifying. He took a few deep breaths and readied himself before peeking beneath Quinn's dress. He had prepared himself for the worst, so he was pleasantly surprised when his eyes were met with a relatively harmless, although soaking wet, pair of pink panties. "I guess we need to take those off first, huh?" He laughed nervously before brining his hands to her hips and helping her slide her underwear down her legs. Never in a million years did he think he'd ever spend a Friday night taking off some girl's underwear. He knew the whole situation was even more terrifying and uncomfortable for Quinn than it was for him, so he made eye contact with her and smiled kindly before gently easing her knees apart. He looked, and Quinn watched all the color drain from his face.
"What is it?" She asked, panicked.
Kurt wasn't really sure what it was supposed to look like, but he could clearly see the tiniest bit of a baby's head. "You were right," he answered. "She's right there."
Quinn's eyes grew wide, "What do you mean 'right there'?" she asked, because although she knew it sure as hell felt like she was right there, she didn't even think she'd been in labor all that long.
"I mean," Kurt paused and took her hand, fairly certain what he was going to say was going to freak her out, "I can see the top of her head."
Quinn threw her head back, "this is not happening to me."
"Preaching to the choir, sister," Kurt said, getting off the couch just long enough to stick his head out of the door of the bathroom. "HEY," he screamed as loud as he possibly could in the direction of the choir room, "WE NEED SOME HELP IN HERE!" He did it even though he was sure that between the distance and the loud music no one would hear him. Kurt came back into the bathroom, grabbed his phone from his pocket, and was just about to send out a text message to the entire club when Quinn moaned in pain.
"Kurt," she reached for him. "I'm having another one," she said through gritted teeth, even though it was obvious what was happening.
He took her hand, "Breathe, Quinn." When he looked at her face it was red and scrunched up and he realized what she was doing. "Don't push!"
"I can't help it," she sobbed.
"Alright, it's okay, do what you have to do," he soothed. "You're doing a good job." He looked between her legs and was relieved to see that her pushing really hadn't changed the position of the baby as much as he feared it had. Once her contraction was over, he grabbed his phone and quickly typed up a message, In the girl's bathroom on the south hall. Need help now! He hit send and prayed that at least someone in Glee club would have forgotten to turn their phone on vibrate that day.
"I'm burning up," Quinn said, so he went to the sink and wet a paper towel for her forehead. While he was at it, he had the foresight to wash his hands. He was pretty sure your hands needed to be clean if you planned on delivering a baby.
"Here," he said, running the cool, wet paper towel over her face and then lifting her head and helping her take a sip from his water bottle.
She smiled at him weakly, "Thank you, Kurt."
He winked at her, "You owe me."
Brittany's phone quacked and Mr. Schuester sent her a disappointed look. She never remembered to turn her phone on vibrate. "Yay!" she clapped excitedly. "I have a message!" She read it out loud, even though no one seemed to care what it said. "It's from Kurt. In the girl's bathroom on the south hall. Need help now!" Brittany paused, "I wonder if he's out of toilet paper."
Puck smirked, "What the hell is Hummel doing in the girl's bathroom?"
"He feels more comfortable in there," Tina explained, causing the boys to erupt in a fit of laughter.
"That's ridiculous and it doesn't make any sense," Rachel stated. "It's a Friday evening and we're the only people left in the school. Why wouldn't Kurt just go to another stall and get what he needed?"
Mercedes looked around the room, "You guys, where's Quinn?"
"She went to the bathroom a while…." Santana offered, but was interrupted before she could finish.
"I saw her wincing and rubbing her back earlier," Artie said, realization slowly dawning on him.
Will shook his head, "I can't believe I was so focused on regionals that I didn't notice Quinn. Finn, you and Mike go get lots of clean towels from the locker room. Rachel, run to the library and get whatever baby books you can find. Tina, you call 911. Let's go!" He commanded before leading them all out of the choir room.
"Quinn," Kurt coached from between her legs. She was in the throes of another contraction. "You're going to have to push harder than that."
"I can't do it. It hurts too much."
"You're Quinn Fabray," he reminded her, "you can do anything. And the faster you get her out the faster it'll stop hurting." This seemed to motivate her enough because she curled her chin to her chest and pushed hard. "That's it! You're doing it!" he couldn't believe he was cheering as he watched more and more of the baby's head appear. He'd been able to avoid touching her so far because Quinn had been doing all of the work and there really wasn't anything for him to do but now enough of the baby's head was out that he was going to have to face the inevitable.
"Get her out!" Quinn yelled.
"She's coming," he promised. "I'm going to have to put my hands down there now, alright?"
"I don't care, just get her out of me," she panted, but even in the midst of everything she couldn't help but find how sensitive he was being to her incredibly sweet.
"What do I do now?" He asked, cupping the baby's head gently with his hand.
"God," Quinn said between contractions, trying desperately to remember what they'd taught her in that stupid birthing class she took. "I don't know. Don't pull on her and don't let her come out too fast. Just support her body as she comes out." She shook her head. Was she really instructing her gay sixteen year old teammate on how to deliver her baby on the couch in the school bathroom?
"Keep pushing, I can see her ears." He was repulsed by what was happening, but he couldn't let Quinn know that and honestly, he also found it all pretty miraculous. Quinn pushed hard again and, with a scream, the rest of the baby's head emerged.
"Is she out?" Quinn asked in desperation. The pain between her legs was so intense that she figured she had to have delivered the baby.
"Just her head."
"Does she have a mohawk?"
Kurt raised his eyebrow and looked at her like she'd completely lost it, "Seriously?"
Quinn nodded, "I don't want my baby to have a mohawk."
"No," Kurt laughed, double checking just to be sure. "She has hair though."
At just that moment, the door to the bathroom flew open and Puck came running in, followed by most of the Glee club.
"Shit, babe," Puck said, rushing to kneel beside Quinn and taking her hand.
"You really weren't kidding when you said you needed help," Mercedes laughed, patting Quinn's shin.
Quinn cried at the sight of them, mainly because she was relieved but also because she realized that her entire team was going to see her lady business before the night was over. "I'm having the baby," she whispered to Puck pitifully, as if it wasn't obvious.
"Guys," Mr. Schuester said to Artie and Matt after assessing the situation, "why don't you go wait by the front for the ambulance?"
Artie's face was pale, "Gladly."
"Let's go, dude." Matt pushed Artie's chair and took off running.
"Are you two alright?" Mr. Schuester asked, taking special care to not look anywhere but Quinn's face.
"I know a lot more about Quinn now than I ever wanted to," Kurt joked, "but we're okay."
"Do you want someone to take over for you?"
Kurt considered it, but Quinn looked at him pleadingly and he figured they'd already come this far together that they might as well go all the way.
"I got the book!" Rachel announced proudly, coming into the bathroom and waving What to Expect When You're Expecting in the air. "It says what to do in case of a home delivery." She glanced between Quinn's legs and her eyes were as wide as saucers. "My goodness, it looks like you're already to step five! That's quite impressive, Quinn!"
Quinn rolled her eyes. If she hadn't had a person half way out of her, she may have just slapped Rachel right then and there. "I feel like I need to push again," she said directly to Kurt and he nodded at her to go ahead.
"It says to support the mother's back while she pushes," Rachel read, so Santana slipped behind Quinn and helped her sit up further. "Gently help deliver the shoulders. Once they're both out, the rest of the baby should follow."
"Remember this the next time some guy tries to get you in bed with him." Quinn warned the other girls between pushes.
"One more big push and she'll be here," Kurt told her. She pushed as hard as she could, collapsing back onto Santana for support when she felt the baby slip from her body. "You have a beautiful daughter," he announced proudly, holding up the screaming baby so Quinn could see her.
"Lay her on Quinn's chest," Rachel instructed. "Here," she said, removing her cardigan and handing it to Puck, "we need to dry her off and keep her warm."
"Hi," was all Quinn could manage to whisper through her tears when Kurt placed the baby on her chest.
Puck kissed Quinn's temple and covered the baby with Rachel's sweater. "You did good, mama."
"We have towels!" Mike said as he and Finn burst through the door. "Oh," He stopped dead in his tracks, "looks like we're a little late."
Rachel crossed her arms and huffed, "you two would show up mere seconds after I sacrificed my favorite sweater for the sake of Quinn and Noah's baby."
Finn stared in disbelief at the couch and all the people on it, "That's a baby."
"I know," Brittany smiled, "she just came out of Quinn!"
"They're in here," Will heard Artie's voice outside the bathroom and a group of paramedics walked in seconds later.
"Whoa," one laughed, "there are a lot of people in this bathroom."
"Give them some space, guys," Will instructed the kids, ushering them out into the hall. "You can all see the baby later."
One paramedic went to work on Quinn while the other carefully assessed the baby, cleaning her off further and clamping off her umbilical cord. "She looks really healthy," he announced before wrapping her up in a blanket and handing her back to Quinn. "You deliver her all by yourself?" He asked, looking at Kurt.
Kurt shrugged sheepishly, as if what he'd just done was no big deal. "He did," Quinn piped up.
"You did a damn fine job, kid. Most adults couldn't have handled this as well as you did. You ever consider a career in medicine?"
"Oh," Kurt looked down at his bloodstained clothes, "hell no."
"Hey," Kurt knocked softly on the door to Quinn's hospital room later that night. "Can I come in?" He'd just heard from Artie that he'd accidentally gotten an eyeful when he and Tina had been visiting while Quinn was trying to nurse the baby and he certainly didn't want to see any more of the former cheerleader than he already had that night.
"Yeah," Quinn laughed, "I'm decent."
"I come bearing gifts," he placed a vase of beautiful pink and purple flowers on her bedside table and handed her a soft pink teddy bear.
"Oh, Kurt," she smiled, "you really didn't have to."
"I know," Kurt shrugged, "I like to shop."
Quinn looked at him, tears welling in her eyes, "Thank you," she paused and glanced down at her daughter, "for everything."
He bent to place a soft kiss on her cheek, "you're welcome."
"Do you want to hold her?"
Kurt shook his head, "I don't do babies."
She arched one eyebrow and smirked at him, "You don't 'do' babies? You delivered her!"
"You didn't leave me much of a choice," he said jokingly.
"Come on," Quinn pleaded, "I need a picture of you with her."
"Fine," he relented and carefully took the sleeping baby from her arms. The baby startled awake and she blinked a few times as her eyes tried to focus on his face. "She is awfully cute," Kurt admitted with a smile.
Quinn nodded, "I think so. Rachel said she's the cutest baby she's ever seen…after herself of course."
Kurt laughed quietly, "Of course." He looked down at baby, "So does baby Fabray have a name yet?"
"Well, sort of. I was actually waiting to talk to you about that."
"I know it's tempting, but you can't name her Kurt."
Quinn giggled, "Her first name is Ella…"
"That's a pretty name.
"But I was wondering if you wanted to choose her middle name."
"Me?" Kurt asked, taken aback.
Quinn nodded, "yes, you. You saved our lives today, Kurt."
"Well," Kurt thought for a minute. Naming a person was a big responsibility and he, unlike Finn, realized you had to pick a name better than Drizzle. "Do you like the name Kate?"
"Ella Kate," Quinn said, repeating the name out loud. "I think it's perfect. What made you think of Kate?"
He looked at her, "it was my mother's name." He paused as it occured to him that Quinn may not want her daughter to be named after his dead mother. "Is that okay?"
Quinn reflexively placed her hand over her heart and nodded, "I think that makes the name that much more special."
"What do you think, Ella?" Kurt asked the baby. She stared at him intently and then reached up and curled her tiny hand around his finger. He nearly melted and suddenly the blood stained shirt and jeans he'd had to throw away didn't matter. Everything he'd been through with Quinn was worth it and he knew he'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.
"Oh," Quinn cooed, "she likes you!
"She does," Kurt smiled softly. "I like her too."
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this! I know I had lots of fun writing it. Authors love feedback, so please leave a review and let me know what you think!