Bakura laughed loudly as he flipped through the pages of a small book, drinking in the information inside of it as if his life depended on it. An insane grin spread across his face as he attempted to stifle his laughter with his hand.
Ryou opened the door to their small apartment, looking exhausted from a long, tedious day of school. He threw his bag at his bed as he stepped through the threshold into the main room of the apartment. The pale boy nearly jumped out of his skin as Bakura's hysterical laughter met his ears.
The uniform clad boy sprinted quickly into the den, only to see his yami lounging comfortably on their brown plush loveseat, Bakura's feet hanging off of one end. There was a book in his hands, but Ryou couldn't make out what it was. Bakura was so focused on It that he did not even hear his host's hurried arrival.
Ryou stood in the doorway, dead silent with confusion. Why in the world was Bakura reading? He didn't think he knew how to read – his yami had never taken an interest in books before – and what was so funny that it caused him to laugh like that, and be so completely engrossed in it?
Oh no. Not that. Anything but that!
Bakura finally became aware of Ryou's arrival looking up from the book, his hair falling away from his face as he did so, his eyes dancing with glee. "Welcome home, Princess." He said mockingly, as was his usual greeting, laughter threatening to gush forth from his mouth again as he spoke, rousing Ryou from his stupor.
"A-ah, thank you.." Ryou mumbled in response, breaking eye contact from his highly amused yami as his heart continued to sink lower into his chest, worries emerging in his mind.
Waving the book in front of him carelessly, Bakura chuckled under his breath. "I found some interesting reading material today." He said seethingly, raising an eyebrow at Ryou, who still had not moved from the doorway, his eyes fixated on the floor as he panicked. Oh how he loved to watch him panic.
Scoffing as he looked from the book in his hand and back to his sullen host, Bakura spoke up again. "I think you might know this book already, though...but..don't you want to know what it is?" he asked, mirth trickling into his voice as he stared, his dark brown eyes burning into his stoic double. His brow furrowed in frustration as Ryou held his silence. "Answer me."
Ryou clenched his teeth together, holding his hands tightly against his sides as he stiffened, his voice holding his indignity. "My journal." he mumbled, closing his eyes in his embarrassment and shame.
Bakura raised a hand to his ear, acting as if he hadn't heard. "Pardon? I didn't catch that, you're mumbling."
The boy's face clouded and burned as he choked back a worried sob. "M-my journal!" he blurted, stamping a foot on the ground to make sure he was heard this time. He opened his eyes, glaring hatefully at his yami as he marched into the room and launched himself at Bakura, trying desperately to pry the book from his yami's much nimbler hands.
"Hah. Not so fast, yadonushi! I thought I would share with you my favorite part!" Bakura said, holding the book high above his head, holding Ryou back roughly with his other hand as Ryou scrambled frantically to try to reach the book.
Bakura squinted up at the book, his eyes scanning the page as he searched. He nodded in satisfaction as he found the place he had been speaking of. Ryou clawed at the outstretched arm that held him back, letting out a tiny whimper as his yami began to read the passage, mimicking Ryou's voice, though it held a very mocking tone that Ryou himself would never have.
"He bruised me again today. It hurts so much, but lately its been making me happy too. I wonder why? Maybe..maybe its because this is the only way he knows how to show his affection..--"
"Stop!" Ryou whined, grasping Bakura's hand, attempting to take the book back. Bakura pushed him away violently, grinning as laughter wound his way into his voice. Ryou covered his ears, huddling against the opposite end of the love seat, screwing his eyes closed. How could not, however, ignore Bakura when he spoke.
"-- I know I feel that way about him, the way he moves and the way he looks at me while he hurts me...that must mean something, doesn't it? It feels nice to be wanted..--"
" – I like to watch him, too. I wonder if he's noticed..I don't think so. He doesn't always pay attention to me. God, the way his eyes look when I've messed up again – so scary! But..so wonderful too...--"
"D-don't read anymore!.."
"I think I'm falling in love with him. I don't know why... He's always here when I need company.. though what he does isn't very...comforting. Its nice to feel wanted … Does he need me? At least he acknowledges my existence. I know I'm alive if I'm hurting... I love you, Bakura. I hope that someday you might feel the same way about me.."
Bakura let loose a searing laugh as Ryou crushed himself against the arm of the couch, his eyes filled with tears, his face a deep shade of crimson. He cursed himself, not even realizing for a moment throughout the day that he had taken the precious, personal book out from his school bag. He always kept it safe in there, because Bakura didn't care about his school work.
Snapping the journal shut with one hand, Bakura turned and tossed it at his host's head. It hit Ryou square in the temple, causing him to cry out as his yami added injury to insult, and he buried his head in his hands.
Bakura laughed hollowly as he spoke neat, his voice like ice. "I can't believe you could be so stupid as to think this shit." he spat, throwing an arm comfortably out the back of the couch.
In response, Ryou let out a muffled whimper from inside his poor hiding place. It felt as if his heart had shattered into a million pieces, as the world around him seemed to collapse. He looked up from his hands, his lips quivering as he tried to wipe away his tears in defiance. "I-I was j-just writing.." he whispered, almost inaudible.
"Fuck off." Bakura hissed, watching as Ryou struggled to control his emotions. "If you're dumb enough to try to keep a diary from me – " He used the female version of the word on purpose, grinning as Ryou flinched with indignity. "-- you can't fucking lie to me, brat."
"Its not stupid!" Ryou nearly spat, shifting his doe-eyed gaze onto his yami's as he set his jaw in anger. "It isn't stupid! I-its the only thing that keeps me sane! W-while you...while..you..--"
Bakura cut him off abruptly, anger rising in his voice. " While I what?"
"While you..while you..h-hurt me.."
His yami smiled suddenly, leaning over to Ryou, a grin playing across his features. "I'll tell you a secret now." Bakura whispered, his tone was deadly serious as Ryou's curiosity was piqued.
"W-what is it?" He said timidly, shrinking back into the couch, suddenly nervous.
"I'm dumb enough to keep a journal, too. – Though I only ever bother to use it when something pisses me off, or if I get bored." Bakura looked away, his face unreadable.
Ryou stared wide-eyed at his silent yami, a question forming on his lips as he blurted it out, unable to keep his curiosity in check. "W-where is it? C-can I s-see it?" He held his knees tighter against him, expecting some kind of attack at his questioning.
Bakura looked back at him, a manic grin appearing on his pale face as he laughed, his eyes burning into his host's.
"I'm looking at it."