A/N: Title inspired by If You're Reading This by Tim McGraw.
Unbeta-ed. Please excuse the mistakes.
Disclaimer: No, I don't own these people. I can't afford it.
Dean looked up from Dad's journal, saw Lisa walk towards him with a letter in her hands. There was a soft sad smile on her face, the same one that she wore these days whenever she studied him. That smile made his heart ache, like a phantom hand squeezing that organ slowly and steadily. He offered a small smile smile in return, and closed the journal.
His smile turned puzzled as she closed the distance and sat down beside him at the dining table, her hands stretching out to pass him a letter.
"Is this for me?" Lisa nodded.
Dean glanced at the front of the envelope and froze. The handwriting was Sam's.
If you're reading this, looks like I had a one-way trip down to the Pit. But you already knew that. Thanks for honoring my last request. No one else deserves a normal life more than you do.
I know you'll remember to take care of everybody, to take care of the car, but most importantly, remember to take care of yourself.
I hope you'll remember me not as the person who said yes to Lucifer, but as the Sammy whom you raised to be the Sam whom you taught to always do the right thing, no matter what.
Your little brother,
"Sam spoke to me about a week ago, saying that he mailed a letter for you to my address, and to give it to you when you reached here. I didn't really believe it, but then I got this letter about three days ago. I thought this is the right time to give it to you." Lisa was trying to explain it to Dean, but it didn't look like he heard anything much after his brother's name.
She didn't know if it was the right thing to do, but after what he had told her, she thought he needed some closure.
She covered his hand with hers, and he didn't flinched away. At the corner of her eye, she saw Ben watching them quietly from the living room. After he received the letter, Dean had completely shut down. He didn't talk, didn't eat his dinner, didn't do anything else but stare at that scrap of paper as if it held all the answer to his questions. Questions that she couldn't help answer, but maybe the letter could.
She just held on tightly to his hand.
Ben didn't know what was wrong with Dean, and no one would tell him. He tried to talk to him, but whenever he did Dean would smile at him, like a sad sort of smile and just ruffled his hair.
Mum told him to give him some space and not bother him too much, and Ben had followed her words, although somewhat reluctantly. He wanted the old Dean, the one who talked to him like an adult and showed him cool moves, but it didn't look like he would be that Dean anytime soon.
Ben also wanted to talk to Dean about the really tall stranger that he noticed the other day at the store, the one who looked like Sam, Dean's brother. He guessed that both Dean and Sam had a fight, and that was why he wouldn't come by to the house with Dean. Also, whenever Mum brought Sam up, Dean had this pained and angry look on his face. So yeah, maybe they had a fight.
Maybe it was best that he didn't bring Sam's name up too.
Sam stared at the scene in Lisa's dining room from under his usual spot under the streetlight, right hand idly playing with the amulet around his neck. He stared as if committing the entire scene in his memory, imprinting it in his mind until it was impossible to erase.
After a long while, he turned around and walked into the darkness without turning back.
He had been there for five days. It was time to go.
Thanks for reading!