I have been torturing my love for a while with the ton of Jeff dom fics I'm making her read so I just wanted to do this one thing for her…I can SO make Jeff sub. Just that I prefer not to. And he's easy to hurt…and mah husband loves his horror, does he not? This ish a very basic plot, no SPN stuff here, people…no problem—just the very possessiveness of Miz. I can't believe that I'm taking Mike sub…and to Jeff no less.

This has like three parts…maybe four. Maximum five. I just don't wanna work on something lengthy and long and Jeff subbish while I have a ton of other things I wanna write. XD. That and I need to finish mah other 3,000 fics. -_- …I'll delete them all one day.

"Bleeding Me" is a Metallica song from the album Load, released in 1996 *a year after my birth, and a year before my sister's birth*, Track number 7...METALLICA! ME5AR3A ALAYHOOM!


Bleeding Me
Rated: +18 – dark; probably be +18 because of darkness
Summary: After John Morrison's death, Mike Mizanin, who's also been in the car crash, neglected, reaches out for the only person he can reach out for. Jeff Hardy. But Mike doesn't share very well. Miz/Jeff SLASH.
Genre: Horror/Suspense


(bleeding me)

~ . b l e e d . ~

an echo of silence

the silence deafens

the silence kills

(b l e e d)



like a ghost


silence is


(b l e e d)

but duct tape



(b l e e d…)


and we must breathe

continue to breathe

…it feels like dying

(b l e e d…)

duct tape

is –

the noise breaks the





a heart

that refuses to depart

(b l e e d…)

~ . b l e e d . ~

~ M I K E M I Z A N I N ~

~ D E A T H A N D P A I N ~

Ever since I was ten years old, I was obsessed with blood.

It was pretty. The scent of it, coppery metal…that I wanted to lick against my lips, tasted like life…it was life, was it not? The texture…the liquid, as it seeped, thin liquid…cold sweet liquid…maybe that was why I had become a cutter. To drink the blood. It felt like the most real thing in the world to feel the blood of someone…in my lips, going through my body, to take us together, to bind us together…for eternity.

Maybe that was when I started to cut Jeff in his sleep.

He was such a heavy sleeper.

And oh, I wasn't insane, not a messed up child, no, none of that at all… I used to knock down Jeff purposely, off a flight of stairs, allow him to overdose on sleeping pills, drugging his body endlessly with anesthetics and Jeff would fall asleep for hours, numb and unable to move…even if he was awake, I could've done it but then little Jeffery would report everything to Matthew and that wouldn't be a fun game, that would be tedious and stupid and besides, I loved watching him sleep…it was like him being dead, and the blood…so real…underneath my tongue, like life…

In both of us.

I drained the blood and then I waited until it would wear off and if it wasn't for the fact that Matt rarely visited us, along with my longtime fiancé, John Morrison, I wouldn't have gotten away with it. Because sometimes, Jeff would be completely drugged for days, just asleep and when he woke up, he didn't question the cuts on his body at all…but I could see the fear in his eyes as he called his Doctor and reported another case of something he 'did in his sleep'.

There was another thing I loved about Jeff.

His fear.

The way his feet would start trembling before the rest of his body, the sweet terror that shocked his eyes, it was addictive, knowing I could make someone fear me…made me feel powerful, important…and God, Jeff was so pretty when he was scared. After horror movies, he'd roll his body into a ball and bury his head into his knees. It was utterly adorable…the way his body rocked, as if he was a mere child.

Childish whimpers and whispers were what made drinking blood all the more real I suppose. That was why the criminals in the horror movies did it, no? It was why they waited for the fear…they gorged on the fear, on the terror, it wouldn't be fun if the victims took their death with courage—no, that wasn't fun at all. Not for me and little Jeffery. The sweetest part was that Jeff didn't even know he was playing in this wicked game of mine.


That morning, as Jeff woke up from his two-day sleep, I could've sworn he looked sick as he clutched his stomach as if he was hurting and I knew that Jeff always felt sick when something bad was about to happen. He explained that to me before…that he always felt so eerie, as if at that moment, something horrible was happening. He ate breakfast and I didn't feel like eating.

Not food anyways.

No. I wanted Jeff.

If only John could hear my thoughts right now, he'd refuse to marry someone so sick minded but I couldn't help it. It was the perfect smooth curve of his thighs that made me want to dispose of the clothing, to tear off everything, until he was bare, bare for my hands, bare for me to touch…

And then – Jeff dropped the spoon and clutched his stomach. "Imma go lie down. I think I got your fever."

I nodded towards him and told him I'd go get some medicine, not even remembering the words I was saying after they'd slipped out of my mouth as I grabbed onto the keys and I left, shutting the doors behind me and then there he was, standing there with his thin figure as his hands wrapped around my waist and his lukewarm lips pressed against my neck, he licked and kissed my neck a multitude of times before I started responding to him, kissing his neck as well, just to feel the salty flesh…this I didn't enjoy doing, the more I kissed his salty flesh, the more I wanted to tear it…I wanted to get close into him, bathe into the blood of his being, two souls to be connected…

Then John pulled apart, sighing softly. "We need to talk."

He made me feel so sick all at once. This was the same man who led me into the road of love, the first man I've ever loved and just moments ago, I was thinking of fucking his best friend's brother…my lips were pressing tightly as he took me towards his car and then, the tears just burst. He was the only person I've ever cried in front of, the first and only, I couldn't be comfortable with anyone else watching those tears cascade and he held onto me, not knowing that sweet and innocent Mike drugged Jeff, one of his closest friends ever, just to drink his blood…that made me feel incredibly bad, incredibly crushed, incredibly horrified.

John's hand ran against my hair. "What happened to you, Mike? You seem so vulnerable…"

If only he knew the thoughts that raced into my head every time I looked at Jeff, and then when I looked at Mike, the violent thoughts that were out of my reach, that just formed and formed and seemed so good but the scent of John's cologne made me forget it all, just the scent of the cologne that had become his signature scent, along with the scent of the type of soap he used…it made me feel so good to be in his arms. But I didn't deserve to be there. I wanted to die right then in his arms, just enveloped into those arms, those wings of love…

John hugged me as tight as he could have. "Keep holding onto me." I pleaded of him but then he let go.

And everything hit me. It was almost as if he didn't love me anymore to just hold me for those few moments and the tears were still falling and I couldn't stop my emotions from pouring, like rain, and I was now in the midst of the rain that burned…burned for me, burned for him and me, breaking rain… and then he kissed my lips, soft and demure…but no love…just the rain that over washed both of us, until nothing was left of us.

And everything hit me. It was almost as if he didn't love me anymore to just hold me for those few moments and the tears were still falling and I couldn't stop my emotions from pouring, like rain, and I was now in the midst of the rain that burned…burned for me, burned for him and me, breaking rain… and then he kissed my lips, soft and demure…but no love…just the rain that over washed both of us, until nothing was left of us.

He cupped my face. "I-" John cut the sentence by kissing me again.

We had sex, we loved each other…he was my first in everything I've ever known that was beautiful, he was my first roller coaster ride, he was my first Popsicle stick, he was my first chocolate coated strawberry, he was everything to me…and he was my first love, my first ever seen rainbow, bathing across the sky and I remembered those stupid times we used to spend side by side…

I was besotted with John.

Smitten with him.

And then, there was lights, lights that glowed in ultraviolet.

And then everything just broke, everything just spun out of control and I could feel myself bury my head into his chest, and his arms were around me, gripping with all his might and everything spun and everything was black and everything just hit me like a wave and I wanted to hold onto him…hold onto the last bit of happiness, the last bit of sanity left in me…

And I heard him say those words. For the first time, ever, "I love you."

"I…" I wanted to say it as well but instead, I coughed up blood…and onto his flesh, and everything was so blurry as I tried to open my eyes as I breathed, lying on top of him, the car smashed into a tree and we were bleeding…he was crushed between the glass, blood seeping from his every pore and he kissed me, 'I love you." He repeated…patting my hip, running his finger across the flesh, and laughing before coughing up a pool of blood.

But his ribcage just stopped moving up and down, and his eyes just shut and his lips were battered with blood.


That was the last time I'd ever wanted to look at blood again in my life. That was the last time I'd ever want to touch anyone.

That was the last time I'd ever love anyone in my life.

~ . b l e e d . ~

I still had the engagement ring around my finger.

It was now my most prized possession, I never took it off…no, it was the only thing that I wanted, the only thing that I kept on at all times…this ring…made of a diamond, and the moment that Jeff started feeling well again, it was after John had had his last breath and Matt came over to take me to the hospital.

God hated me.

He wouldn't let me go to John.

And I wanted someone…I needed someone…I needed…I needed closure and Jeff—God, Jeff was the perfect type of closure. He was the one who would patch up the holes in my body, the one that would make everything seem clear again…Jeffery Nero Hardy. The one that would make me forget.

I wanted nothing to do with him anymore. Nothing more than to just keep someone alive…he was the only thing that I had right now…Matt was of no value to me—no, it was Jeff.

Pretty little Jeffery, with his pretty little colorful strands of hair, with his pretty little breakable smile…

No. I had to stop thinking like this.

But God…

So pretty.

Oh, no, Jeffery, you wouldn't make me think this way. You were my victim—part of my game and he wasn't going to die, not if I can help it. He can't die…not unless I kill him. No. I controlled it. I controlled Jeff's death. I controlled his life. He was mine. All mine.

And Matty, dear Matty, I wasn't going to share.

~ . b l e e d . ~


Kassandra Diaz belongs to me…for like, ever. She's MAH METALLIGRAM. She ish so awesome, she combined the awesomeness of HIM and Metallica into a Metalligram, XP.




I love her. X3.

X Sam.