Spoilers: Season 5- Takes place sometimes after Brain Storm
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or Stargate: Atlantis
A/N: Please leave reviews. They are always welcome. Too many ideas bouncing in my head and too much hot weather do not make for a good combo and the real evilness comes out.
Rodney stepped out the bathroom, shaking the excess water from his hair. He smiled over at the woman sitting on the bed, "What are you reading?" he asked as he pulled a t-shirt on over his head. Tonight the sleepover was in his quarters.
"It," Jennifer held up the large book.
"Odd choice," he laughed. "By odd I mean that clown reminds me of a wraith with those teeth and all." Rodney sat down on the bed next to Jennifer, trying to see what page she was on.
"Hey, stop that," she pushed his face away. "You are distracting me," the blonde did not mind the distraction, but she was at a good part and she wanted to get through it.
"Yes, dear," he sighed. "Just turn out the light when you are done," he gave his girlfriend a quick kiss on the cheek before getting under the covers. Rodney watched her for a moment before closing his eyes and sleep took over.
Jennifer continued to read for almost a half hour, casually stroking his hair as she read. She nearly jumped out of her skin when Rodney suddenly sat up, "What is it?" there was concern in her voice.
"Oh, I got it!" Rodney snapped his fingers in quick succession.
"Got what?" her heart was still pounding.
"How to get back at Sheppard. It just came to me...actually your book gave me the idea," he started to laugh manically. "We know how John just loves clowns."
Jennifer wondered where he was going with the idea and closed her book to hear more, "What did you have in mind?"
"I'm not sure yet. I am thinking life-sized clown in his bed," Rodney looked over at her for approval and to see if she had any ideas of her own.
She grinned, liking the idea, "What about adding sound? Can you make it voice activated?"
Rodney started to chuckle, "Oh...oh...oh. That is an excellent idea. Very good idea. I can manage that." He was very proud that she had come up with that idea. "Smart, devious, evil and sexy. How did I ever get so lucky?" he grinned. The Canadian's mind was racing with all the ideas that flooded his mind. "Of course it will be easy for me to get into his quarters when he is sleeping. But do I fill his rooms with balloons with blood? Okay so it won't be real blood but something that looks like it. It will be the perfect revenge. Scratch the balloons it will be too messy."
Jennifer looked at her boyfriend and shook her head, "How long will it take to get everything you need?" It was all harmless fun the pranks the two were playing as long as neither of them got hurt.
"It shouldn't be too long. I can make most of the clown by myself. I just am going to need to get a head I can send a request with the scheduled dial-in tomorrow. This is going to be great. There won't be anything he can do to top this," he was excited at the prospect of this and could imagine Sheppard's reaction to be woken up by a life sized clown in his bed.
"Make? As in sew?" she asked.
"Oh, not me. I thought you could do that part. Um, I'm not saying that because you a woman, but it is just as if you were stitching someone up, right? I think Radek has some fabric lying are around the lab. I can just borrow some. I have to make all the inner works like the voice box and movable arm," Rodney's ears turned pink.
"It is not exactly the same. I can give it a try, but I cannot make any promises that it will come out like you want it." Jennifer grinned as she noticed his ears turned color. Nice save, McKay.
He shook his head, "I'm sure you will do fine. It doesn't need to be perfect. Just good enough to look real and scare the daylights out of Sheppard." Rodney never did anything simple. He found John's attempt to turn his urine blue weak in comparison to his plans. Having two geniuses working on an idea was better than one.
"Remind me to never get on your bad side. I don't want to wake up and find my fears next to me," Jennifer tossed the book on the floor and laid down. She was growing tired and she needed to rest, knowing she had an early shift in the infirmary. In the downtime there she could come up with ideas to enhance his plan for Sheppard.
"Don't you worry, the only thing you will be waking up with is me. And unless you find me scary you have nothing to worry about," he smirked. "Wake me up before you leave for your shift. I need some beauty sleep so my brain can recharge. Night," the Canadian quickly kissed her soft lips before settling into the usual cuddling sleep position.
One Month Later
"Do you almost have it?" Jennifer asked as she stood at the opposite side of the table from where Rodney was working in his lab.
The physicist let out a disgusted sigh as he tossed the mechanical arm on the table, "No!" There was a little more anger in his voice than he would have liked. "I cannot get this damn arm to function right," he ran his hands through his hair, making it stand on end.
She was taken aback by his sudden outburst, but she also found him incredibly adorable at the moment with his messed up hair and face streaked with grease, "Is the mechanical arm that important?" she asked a smile cracking her lips.
"No...yes...no...yes...no. Not really... Sort of. Okay not so much. It would be nice to have, but it works only half the time and I don't want that not working half to be when I really need it. It would have been fun to have. To grab a hold of his arm and not let go, but I have no idea how long it would take me to get it to work. I mean I have an idea why it doesn't work and I don't have the part I need to fix it. So maybe there are a few things around here that have the part but I cannot go harvesting pieces from essential project here and I don't want to wait another month to get the piece from Earth. It looks like I am going to have to go with the voice box only. That is creepy enough as it is, right?" he paused to take a breath.
Jennifer shook her head as he babbled on, only making her smile more, "It will be fine, Rodney." She moved next to him, messing his hair up even more by running her hands through it.
"What are you doing?" Rodney asked.
"Trying to get you to relax," she tried to wipe the grease off his face. "You've been too tense the past two weeks trying to get this clown working. You are coming with me," she grabbed his arm and pulled Rodney to his feet.
"Where are you taking me?" he resisted being pulled from his lab.
"You are taking your girlfriend to dinner in the mess hall. Having you come to bed after I am asleep is not working for me," Jennifer frowned. "You should put your plan into action tomorrow night. Enough is enough."
"Why tomorrow night?" he asked. If she wanted him to put an end to his obsession, why put it off another day.
"Because before you decide to get too wrapped up in something again I want to remind you what you are missing when you get too wrapped up in your work," she said with a suggestive grin, linking her hand with his. Part of her regretted agreeing to help him with this revenge. If she had know it would have been so time consuming she would have steered his mind in another direction.
"What I am missing... oh," it took his mind a moment to get what she was hinting at. "So I am at your mercy tonight?"
"That is one way of putting it."
"You know I want to wipe that goofy grin right off your face. You had it on all day and it is annoying as hell," John pouted as he picked at his lunch.
Rodney simply rolled his eyes. The goofy grin as the colonel put it was the result of one of the best night of his life and he put off any thoughts of working late for the foreseeable future, "Hmm what were you saying?" he had totally ignored anything the other man had said.
Sheppard knew the Canadian had been too quiet and he hoped it was because he was too busy with his girlfriend to bother with revenge for the blue urine incident, "How's the woman in your life? Any little McKays in the works?"
That got Rodney attention, "No! That is not going to happen for a long while. A long long long while. Shut it, Sheppard." He turned his attention back to his meal. Tonight was the night that Atlantis would hear their military commander scream like a girl. "I've got some work to do," the scientist grabbed for his tablet and headed for the exit.
John frowned at his friend's retreating back. He hated to admit, but he missed having Rodney around to mess around with on their free time. No racing RCs on the lower level of the east pier, no one to play computer golf with. Free time was getting dull and Teyla and Ronan did not appreciate the finer points of Earth entertainment.
Later That Night
John had unsuccessfully tried to raise Rodney on the radio. He had heard that Jennifer had the late shift in the infirmary and thought they could get some male bonding time in. Fate was not on his side tonight. Knowing his team had an early mission in the morning, John thought it would be a good time to catch up on some sleep.
Rodney waited and watched as Sheppard went into his quarters. He purposely ignored the calls over the radio, knowing he had this one chance to execute his plan. McKay looked at his and Jennifer's handiwork. The face was an almost exact replica of Pennywise from the mini-series and he had Bill Lee to thank for supplying it. The Earth-based scientist even found something to make the eyes glow. It was better than he could ever imagine.
Once he was certain that the American was sleeping soundly, Rodney used his override to open the door to John's quarters. It was difficult for McKay not to laugh as he sat the clown down at the foot of his friend's bed. "Sweet dreams, Sheppard." He quickly made his way out of the room and into a suitable hiding spot to activate the voice.
Sheppard had been in a deep sleep when he thought he heard a voice calling to him.
"They all float, John. They ALL float down here. When you're down here with us, you'll float too," the demonic voice came from the clown. Rodney had recorded his own voice and then edited to sound like it was possessed.
John blinked as he heard the voice, not sure if he was dreaming. He turned his head toward the noise and saw an eerie glow from the foot of the bed. "What the hell?"
The voice spoke from the darkness again, "Beep! Beep, Johnny Boy. Let go. Be afraid. You taste so much better when you're afraid."
"Not a dream," he jumped slightly when the glow of the eyes got brighter. John reached to turn on the lamp next to his bed.
"Want a balloon? BEEP! BEEP!"
When light filled the room the colonel let out a small yell, not expecting a demonic clown to be facing him. The sight of the clown made him jump several inches, but it was just enough to send John off the edge of the bed. As he tried to brace his fall his hand hit a water glass on the nightstand. John felt the pain immediately as the glass shattered and become imbedded in his hand. "You are dead, Meredith!" he yelled, figuring that Rodney would not have gone far. "This is what you do when your girlfriend is busy?" Sheppard looked at his hand and saw the blood and knew he would have to make a visit to that girlfriend.
Jennifer had been working on paperwork, wondering how things were going with John. Rodney had not checked in on the radio and she wondered if he had placed the clown yet. She was about to call him when she heard a commotion from the other side of the infirmary and stood up to see what it was about.
"You!" John pointed as soon as he saw Jennifer's head. "Where is he?"
"Where is who?" she knew exactly who she was looking for. "What happened to your hand?"
"Cut it on glass," he said matter of factly. "The soon to be dead chubby Canadian who shares your bed. Where is he?"
"Let's get that looked at," Jennifer went to check out his hand. Things had gone too far and one of them got hurt. This was not how it was supposed to be.
John winced as she cleaned out the wound, "You knew what he was planning, didn't you?" The look on her face told more. "You helped him? That's cheating." Two against one was not fair. He had to grudgingly admit that the clown was a good idea and this meant that he would have to come up with something better and maybe get some help to even out the playing field.
"Who do you think gave him the idea to make it talk?" she said with a shrug of her shoulders. The cut to his hand was not deep and only took two stitches to close. "Should we call a truce?" Jennifer knew Rodney would not hear of it, but she wondered if next time someone would get seriously hurt.
"Not a chance," Sheppard laughed. "Meredith is not going to win this game." Everything had to be a competition with them.
A/N: I adapted some of the quote of Pennywise from the mini-series version. Quote taken from IMDB and I got the idea to use IT from reading DH's twitter feed, as he was reading it a while back.