Order up: Punk fluff with a side of profanity. Yay.


The hunt for organic waffles began at six am.

Six in the god damn morning, and Phil was at Whole Foods standing in the frozen foods section trying to figure out what the fucking difference was between whole-grain waffles and wheat waffles. With his luck, there probably wasn't any.

There were only two reasons Phil found it necessary to get up before or at six in the morning, and they were either to take a leak or catch a flight.

That is until Ellie, his girlfriend, got these random food urges at he'd never understand at times that he deemed did not exist.

Funny thing? She wasn't pregnant. She was just weird. But let him ask her for a simple glass of water, and it was World War III in his apartment.


"Phil," Ellie called softly to him as his eyes flickered open and settled on her hazily. He raised an eyebrow in question. "Do me a favor?" She started to lazily draw random circles on his chest.

Phil inhaled deeply and let it out, settling his hand on her lower back. "Hmm?" he grunted, not quite in the mood to actually speak.

"I'm hungry."

"So eat." He replied tiredly.

"I want waffles. Organic waffles."

"Yeah. Okay, babe...," he replied absently, letting his eyes drift back closed.

"Phil." Ellie was persistent, and shook him again. "I'm serious."

"What?" He half grunted, half whined as he buried his head against his girlfriend. "I just wan' sleep," he told her, his voice slurred with sleep. "What do you want?"

"Organic waffles." She replied plainly, pulling a hand through his dark hair.

"So go get 'em." He replied, kissing her neck lightly and applying slight pressure to her lower back to keep her close to him. "Later, though. I'm comfortable."

"Can you go get them for me, please?"

"I don't have organic waffles." He yawned, going to close his eyes. "And we have waffles in the freezer."

"But I don't want Eggos." Ellie rolled her eyes. "Please? You can get them at Whole Foods, babe."

Phil sighed and pulled his head from her, looking at her slightly more alert. "That's a ten mile drive, Ellie."

She stuck her lip out and pouted. "Please? I'll thank you later."

So she was asking him to get out of bed and propositioning him. He loved a multifaceted woman.

He looked over her head and at the digital alarm clock on her side of the bed. "Ellie, you kidding me? It's five in the morning. Go back to sleep." He let his head fall back on the pillow.

Ellie shook her head. Not to be deterred, she leaned in and kissed his lips lightly. "Please?"

He didn't respond to the sign of affection from his girlfriend. He was not falling for this.

"Baby…" Ellie whined softly and leaned in again, kissing him again with a bit more pressure than before.

Somewhere in the middle of all this, Ellie ended up lying on top of him, still kissing him as Phil's hands rested on her waist.

One hand slid a little lower to rest on her hip as another one started to slide down to one of his favorite places, that cute little butt of hers. Before he could though, Ellie stopped the hand by placing her hand on his wrist. She broke their kiss and grinned down at him. "Waffles?"

One of these days, Phil was just going to have to learn to say no.


Womanly wiles. They should be illegal. It was because of that sweet charm of Ellie's that he was standing in a line at Whole Foods looking quite disgruntled while holding two bags of organic waffles, one whole grain and one wheat. He loved that woman to death, but there were times like these that he just wanted to dropkick her.

Lightly, though.

He got to the register and paid for the waffles. He couldn't remember the last time he had to use his debit card to buy waffles. Usually, he bought a giant box of Eggos for six dollars from a normal grocery store (normal because his girlfriend didn't ask him to get up at six in the morning to go to Food 4 Less), and he'd be good.

So it hit him kind of hard when he had to pay eighteen dollars for twelve waffles. He shook his head and signed off his name sloppily on the receipt before handing it to the cashier and walking out with his girlfriend's food. These waffles had better damn be worth it.

xXxXx

Phil stripped down to his boxers as he slipped back into bed, not wrapping his arms around his girlfriend as he usually would. He just crossed his arms and closed his eyes. If he was lucky, he could slip into sleep before the sun peered through his curtains and into his room.

Ellie pressed into his back wrapped her arms around him. "Did you get my waffles?"

"They're in the freezer." Phil kept his eyes closed. If this woman deprived him of anymore sleep, he didn't know what he'd do.

She kissed his bare shoulder lightly. "Thank you."

"Mm." He grumbled.

"Are you mad at me?" She pouted even though he couldn't see it.

"I'm tired." He responded flatly. "I'm going to sleep."

"Don't be mad…" She pleaded softly and placed feather light kisses on his shoulder, leading up to his neck.

'Not the neck. Not the neck. Not the neck,' He chanted silently in his head. If her lips so much as touched his neck, it'd be over and she knew it.

She dropped a single kiss on his neck, keeping her lips there.

"Damn it, Ellie," he groaned, trying to keep from rolling over onto her.

"I love you," she mumbled into his skin, as she started to take the skin into her mouth.

He sighed and rolled over to be half on top of her, pinning her slightly. "Woman, you're nothing but trouble."

She gave him a wolfish grin. "I know."

He shrugged his shoulders more to himself, knowing he wasn't going to get any sleep. "You want those waffles now?"

She shook her head with a small giggle and tangled her hands lightly in his hair, pulling his head down to her. "Later," she mumbled and pushed her mouth up to his.

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