Sam pressed his forehead against the cold window of the Impala, and sighed as he watched the scenery pass by in a blur. He hadn't slept in two days and his eyes burned. Sleep seemed impossible now, all he could think about was the apocalypse and Lucifer and when he actually got a few hours sleep his dreams were plagued by Ruby's taunting voice.

"What's up Sammy?" Dean asked, breaking the silence that had filled the car since they had left the motel room, more then three hours ago.

"Huh? Nothing" Sam murmured, blinking and moving away from the window.

Dean sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Sammy we're both tired and I'm going to be driving for another eight hours, don't make this harder then it needs to be. We both know you'll tell me sooner or later"

"We're not going to survive this are we?" Sam asked bluntly.


"The apocalypse. Even if by some miracle we win, we're not surviving this war are we?" Sam clarified.

Dean sighed sadly and glanced over at Sam before turning back to the road, knuckles turning white as he gripped the steering wheel.

"No Sammy, we're not surviving this. Not this time"

Sam frowned and turned back to the window, body tensed.

"What now?" Dean murmured, exasperated.

"Nothing" Sam answered but continued when he felt Dean's glare. "It's just you've never agreed with me when I say that"

"You're upset because I'm agreeing with you?" Dean asked confused.

"No, it's just I'm used too you laughing and telling me not to worry. That everything is going to be fine" Sam explained, feeling childish at his reaction.

"Well I could say that, but It'd be a lie. And us lying to each other hasn't worked out very well so far has it?"

"No you're right" Sam laughed darkly.

"We could always just run away. Get some angel repelling charms, a shit load of salt and just hide" Dean suggested.

"We could, but we won't. We are cursed with a horrible disease. We care about the rest of the world" Sam mumbled.

"Yeah I know, just a thought"

Sam reached across and took Dean's hand with his own and didn't let go when Dean tried to pull away.

"Dude what if someone . . . ."

"No one is going to see us Dean" San cut him off and held Dean's hand tighter.

Sam's thumb rubbed small circles on his hand before he leant over closer to Dean, lifted his arm and wrapped it around his shoulder. Sam rested peacefully against Dean and relaxed when Dean made no move to push him away.

"At least this time we'll die together" Sam whispered.

"That's a but morbid Sammy" Dean chuckled.

"Well it's true. This time neither of us will be left alone" Sam shrugged.

"Yeah but remember what Ash said? Everyone has their own personal heaven, we'll still be alone."

"He also said soul mates share their heaven"

"You saying we're soul mates Sammy?" Dean laughed, hiding the serious question.

"Why not? After everything we've been through, we're still together"

Dean tightened his hold on Sam and allowed a small smile to cross his face.

"I suppose you're right" Dean agreed after a while.

"It's been know to happen" Sam smiled kissing Dean on the jaw.

Dean smirked and turned his head to pull Sam into a long kiss. Sam managed to pull away panting when he felt the car begin to swerve.

"Dean the road" He yelled, panicking when he saw they were driving into oncoming traffic.

"Whoops" Dean chuckled, turning the car into the right lane.

"Whoops? Whoops? Dean I know we just agreed we'd be dieing soon, but I'm not quiet ready to go yet" Sam snapped, the anger in his voice not really reaching his eyes.

"Sorry little brother" Dean said, chastised but a small smile remained on his face.

"Don't call me that De" Sam pleaded softly.

"Why? It's never bothered you before?"

"It doesn't bother me, not really. It's just, when we're like this, just holding each other and kissing, you calling me 'brother' kind of ruins the mood"

Dean frowned and Sam could feel him tense up beside him. Dean began to slow down and pulled the car onto the side of the road, before turning off the engine and sitting in silence.

"De?" Sam asked, unsure of Dean's reaction.

"You told me you were ok with this" Dean snapped finally.


"When you first kissed me, you told me you didn't care that we're brothers. You told me you wanted this, was I wrong to believe you?"

"Dean I meant what I said. If I hadn't wanted it, I would have stopped it" Sam rushed to reassure Dean, understanding what the problem was.

"The why does me calling you 'brother' bother you?" Dean asked again, sure Sam was lying to him.

"It doesn't bother me all the time, when we're on a hunt or just in the car I don't mind. But when we're being intimate, it kinda feels wrong. Would you like it if at the end of sex when I'm about to cum, instead of calling your name, I call out brother?" Sam demanded to know, he was getting tired of Dean's insecurities about their relationship.

Dean winced when he heard the anger in Sam's voice and he knew he was over reacting, Sam really hadn't meant anything by what he had said earlier. Sometimes it was so hard to believe what they had was really going to last and not fall down around him.

"You're right. I'm sorry Sammy"

"You always say that but it always happens again. I'm tired of it Dean, I'm tired of you attacking everything I say, of you turning it around against me. I meant what I said, I want this, I want us to be together. I don't understand why you act this way. Why is it so hard for you to believe I love you?"

"I know you love me, I've never doubted that. And I know you want this, I wouldn't have started it if I wasn't a hundred per cent sure of that, it's just . . . ."

"What Dean, what is it?" Sam asked gently when Dean stopped talking.

"I'm terrified of losing you" Dean admitted.

"What? You're not gonna lose me De" Sam promised.

"But I might. What happens if this thing between us doesn't work, If I fuck it up, or you find someone else. What do we do then?"

"We go back to being just brothers"

"Could we do that though? With all the things we've done together, kissed, woken up together, had sex, I don't think we could pretend that never happened. I know what would happen. We'd promise not to let anything change, but it would. It'd get awkward being alone together and we'd become like every other failed couple. If this doesn't work, I don't just lose a lover, I lose a brother. I can't lose you again Sammy"

Dean's voice became progressively quieter as he spoke and Sam had to lean closer just to hear what he was saying.

"Dean that won't happen to us. We've been through too much crap to let anything like that happen to us. Even if we do break up, I'll still be here. I promise you Dean, no matter what happens, you will never lose me?"

Dean refused to look at Sam and instead turned his head towards the steering wheel.

"You don't believe me, do you?" Sam asked sadly.

"I wish I did Sammy, I really do"

"What can I do to prove it to you?" Sam asked, a small smirk on his face.

Sam knew he wasn't going to get anymore out of Dean just then and he decided to lighten the atmosphere a little. Dean noticed the smirk and caught on to what Sam was trying to do.

'I don't know. What are you offering?"


Sam reached over and pulled Dean into a deep, powerful kiss, groaning when he felt Dean's tongue begging for entrance. Dean moaned when he felt Sam pull away and tried to follow him, but was pushed back. When he opened his eyes and looked at Sam confused, all he got was a sweet smile in return.

"You didn't think we were going to have sex in the front seat did you?" Sam teased.

Dean's head perked up when Sam mentioned sex. Sam was actually suggesting sex on the side of the road?

Sam continued to smile and crawled into the back seat. Dean was so turned on he barely flinched when Sam kicked the dashboard.

"Well? Are you coming?" Sam asked, spreading himself out on the back seat.

"I will be soon" Dean whispered.

Dean decided it would be safer if he got out of the car and climbed in the back the original way. With the door. Dean hovered over Sam and kissed him passionately

"Lets get intimate" Dean mimicked Sam's words in a girly voice.

"I knew you wouldn't let that one go" Sam mumbled.

"Bitch" Dean chuckled as he lifted up Sam's shirt.

"Jerk" Sam moaned as his jeans were unbuttoned.

"Your jerk"

"Hmm" Sam hummed in agreement. "My jerk"

Sam lost all power of speech and coherent thought when Dean twirled his tongue in just the right spot.

Sam sighed contently as he felt Dean empty himself inside him, the warmth that spread through him was amazing. The muscles in Sam's arms began to shake and gave way. Sam fell on top of Dean with a grunt, which turned into a whine when he felt Dean's soft penis being pulled out, leaving him with a empty feeling.

"How did I end up on top?" Sam asked.

"I don't know"

Dean began to shift uncomfortably when he felt Sam's cum begin to dry on his stomach, sticking him and Sam together. Sam also shivered as Dean's cum leaked out of him and dried on his thighs.

"God Sammy you're so heavy" Dean grunted as Sam's body weight became uncomfortable.

"Are you saying I'm fat?" Sam teased.

'No, I'm saying you're not fourteen anymore and while I enjoy lying like this with you, I don't think my bones can take much more."

Sam was about to reply when he heard a knocking at the window above him. Frowning he wiped the condensation off the window.


"What, what is it?"

Dean arched his neck backwards to see a cop standing outside the window, looking very disapproving.


The end. Please review.