A/N: Thanks to everyone who continued to follow this story. This is the end, although there might be a short epilogue. Hope it was all worth the wait. Please review and let me know your thoughts.
Beyond the Pain
"No, stop, wait…" Kurt fell back heavily against the headboard, knocking it into the wall, as he scrambled to get away. "I'm serious, Noah," he gasped between giggles.
"You don't sound serious."
Kurt tried to give him a stern look, but the effect was lessened by the sparkle in his eyes.
"I said 'take me' not 'tickle me'," he said as he tried to lunge off the bed. Puck caught him mid-air and threw him back on the bed, successfully pinning him down.
He gave him a moment to recover, enjoying the breathless giggles and pink tinged cheeks of his boyfriend. Kurt was so gorgeous. He wasn't sure how he got so lucky. Things had certainly changed for him since they officially started dating. He essentially came out to the whole school. The football team was hesitant to accept him at first, but since Puck was important to them winning the season, they soon came around. The hockey team was another matter. Not that Puck cared what they thought. It was just that 'Rick the dick' was trying to make his life hell. Slushies he could handle but the constant fights was bringing his mom into things. She adored Kurt so that wasn't the problem. It was the fact that he was sinning. But since he'd not done so well in that respect for years, he was able to convince her he was just trading one sin for another so what did it matter? Her affection for Kurt won in the end. At least that was her reasoning as she took his sister and left them alone for a week while she visited family in Chicago.
"Are you just going to stare at me all night, or actually use this thing poking me in the leg?"
Puck smiled. His gorgeous boyfriend was beneath him, wanting his attention. He really needed to focus. Sliding upward, he was rewarded with a low moan of appreciation from Kurt as their erections rubbed together. "You mean like that?"
"Oh God yes,"
Unable to resist any longer, Puck kissed him fiercely. Everything else was forgotten but the hard body beneath him and the amazing heat of the tongue sliding against his. Kurt finally pulled away, gasping for air.
"Clothes… off," he said tugging on Puck's shirt.
He liked to give credit where credit was due… and getting naked was a damn good idea. They hurried to discard their few remaining clothes.
The press of flesh against flesh was even better than he remembered. Kurt wrapped his strong legs around him as they rocked together. Puck knew he had to slow down their pace or it would be over much too quickly.
"Babe," he whispered as he pulled back slightly, Kurt following with his eyes, hooded with lust and slight concern. "I'm not gonna last if you keep doing that. You're just so fucking beautiful."
Kurt smiled, his dimples showing, totally proving his point, as his tongue licked his kiss swollen lips.
"Oh how the mighty Puckzilla has fallen… or risen actually. Aren't you supposed to be a sex god or something?" he teased.
"Not any more. I now worship at your feet."
Kurt laughed. "Noah, sweetie. That's cheesy as hell."
"Doesn't make it any less true."
He couldn't help the serious tone in his voice. Kurt was the David to his Goliath. He was fallen, and he didn't regret a second of it.
"I love you," Kurt said matching his tone for a just a second before continuing. "But more worshiping needs to happen. Like now. This king's scepter needs polishing…"
"Babe, that was bad," he said with a laugh. "But your wish is my command." He moved slightly so he could reach between them, his hand wrapping around his boyfriend's cock. Kurt's eyes fluttered close and his lips parted slightly as Puck stroked him.
He peppered kisses on his jaw and chin, unable to resist the sweetness, the vulnerability of Kurt in that moment. He attacked his neck, licking and sucking the pale skin.
Kurt whimpered as he removed his hand. He tried to keep the friction going with his body instead.
"Open, babe," he whispered. Kurt eagerly sucked on the finger offered, almost causing him to lose focus. He kissed him again heatedly as he moved the now slick finger down to Kurt's hole.
The reaction was immediate, although not the one he expected. Kurt tensed up, his eyes springing open.
"Is the king ready to be crowned?" Puck said trying to regain their light mood.
"We're done with that…"
Puck sat up. Something was definitely wrong. Kurt was staring up at the ceiling, looking like he was ready to cry.
"Babe?" Puck cupped his cheek, turning his face so he couldn't avoid his gaze. "What is it?"
"Just nervous." Kurt smiled weakly at him.
"No reason to be…"
Puck ignored the slight edge to his voice. "It'll be fine," he said. "Nothing to it." That was a mistake.
"And you know this how?" Kurt said sitting up, his eyes flashing. "Because you've had something huge shoved up your ass?"
Of course, he had experimented some, but he decided not to mention that. Kurt was a little scary right now.
"I'm not that big, babe. But it's nice to hear," he joked.
"Not the point, Puck."
"If you're not ready, Kurt, then we don't have to do it," he said, taking his boyfriend's hands in his. "I mean it. Even if you don't ever want to do that. We'll just do other stuff."
Kurt's face crumbled, his anger gone. "I do want to… I just…" He looked down sadly. "This is all my fault."
"Hey, it's no one's fault…"
"But it is, Noah," he said tilting his head slightly with a sad smile. "Confession time." He sighed heavily. "When I thought I was in love with … well, before, it was romantic. I didn't think about sex. Didn't want to. All I wanted was a touch of the hand. A sweet kiss. That was love to me."
Puck nodded, encouraging him to continue. Not that he wanted to think about Finn or how Kurt felt about him, but he somehow knew this was important.
"Then I met you. And nothing could have prepared me. The feelings of need, of pure want. It scared me and excited me at the same time. And for the first time I actively masturbated. Not just in the middle of the night when I would wake up hard, but all the freaking time. I couldn't go through the day without thinking of you, wanting you."
Kurt's cheeks were tinged pink, from either embarrassment or excitement, or a little of both. He wasn't sure which, but it was one of the hottest things he'd ever seen. Still, he needed to pay attention to his boyfriend's heartfelt explanation, instead of just perving on him.
Kurt looked up at him, his blue eyes still darkened with lust, yet shining with unshed tears. "Still there were some things I couldn't try. Not even when we became official and I knew it was going to happen. I wanted to… but the idea of watching porn depressed me, and I didn't know exactly what to do."
"Babe," Puck said as he pulled him into his arms. "We don't have to do that." He rubbed his back soothingly.
"But I want to," Kurt said his words muffled against his chest. He pulled away to look him in the eyes. "That's the problem. When I think about having you inside me… I want it so much. But the reality is when you touch me there, all I can think about is the pain I'm going to feel. I panic," he admitted. "If I'd just experimented more, this wouldn't be an issue. God, I'm such a prude."
"You're not a prude, Kurt," he said tilting his head to look at him. "Your body is so responsive it should be illegal."
"In some states, it is."
"And," Puck continued with a smirk, "your thoughts are so dirty, your daddy would be shocked speechless."
"Okay, let's leave my dad out of this, please."
But he got the desired response. Kurt was now smiling up at him.
"So what I suggest is that we start slow. Agonizingly slow. Until you're begging me to fill you up. And if it takes hours or days or months or years… doesn't matter. We'll do this together."
He must have said the right thing because he suddenly had an armful of Kurt, hugging him tightly.
"I'm so lucky, Noah."
"No, I'm the lucky one. That you bestow this mere mortal…"
"So done with that."
Puck obediently stopped talking as he pulled him closer. Kneeling on the bed with their bodies flush against each other, they kissed eagerly, their earlier passion reignited. His hand moved down to grab his boyfriend's ass. "I love you so much, Kurt," he finally breathed. "Do you trust me?"
"Yes." The answer was automatic yet deliberate.
"I want to touch you. I won't do more until you ask me to. Okay?"
Kurt nodded with a nervous smile.
"Good, now lie down."
He did as requested, staring brightly up at him.
"Before I touch, I want to see? Can you show me, babe?"
Kurt tinged pink again. Instead of answering he pulled his legs up and apart, exposing his dark hole.
Puck couldn't help the groan that escaped. The sight of Kurt offering himself up. His skin tinged with excitement. His dick hard against his stomach. His hole exposed and ready. And the thought that he trusted him so completely. "Fuck, Kurt. You're so damn hot."
He trailed his hand down the slightly quivering thigh, teasingly slow, watching his boyfriend's face for his reaction. A firm stroke of his dick had him moaning loudly. He then cupped his sac, carefully squeezing…
His hand moved lower, finally reaching his goal. He caressed the puckered skin with his thumb, going in a circle, until he pressed gently against the center.
"Fuck… more, please more."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, yes, yes."
Puck moved away completely, causing Kurt's eyes to open. "Noah," he whined.
He retrieved the supplies he needed from his bedside table, before returning to his spot. He settled Kurt's legs against his shoulders. "Relax," he said soothingly. "Give me your hand." He coated his boyfriend's finger with the cool gel and guided it to his anus. Lifting up with his shoulders, he caused Kurt's legs to spread even further.
"Touch yourself," he said. "Show me what you want."
Although Puck's fingers were there guiding him, Kurt was the one in charge. He tentatively pushed and a groan escaped his lips as his fingertip slipped in. Puck rubbed against it, showing him how to relax the tight ring of muscles. Unlike Kurt, he had watched porn and lots of it. And done some experimenting of his own.
As the tightness eased, the finger slipped further inside. Puck waited until he thought he was ready and then pushed his in as well. Kurt was panting, but not in an anxious way. "Okay, babe?"
A nod was all he got, but it was enough. As Kurt curled his finger instinctively, Puck pulled in the opposite direction, opening him up further. Once his boyfriend was able to tolerate the whole finger, he guided him to where he thought his prostrate was at. He knew immediately when they found it by his cry of pleasure.
"Oh my God, Noah!"
He smiled in triumph as he rocked them both back and forth, causing Kurt to hit the spot again and again.
Kurt was moving his hand and for a second Puck thought he was done. But he soon realized he was just adding another finger, pumping vigorously in and out of his hole.
It didn't seem to be enough.
His eyes flew open and through the haze of lust, Puck could see determination.
"I want you. In me."
"Are you sure, Kurt?" He had to be sure. Because once he started, he wasn't sure he could back out. What if his need overtook him? He couldn't hurt him. He had to be sure.
"In me. Now!"
He didn't need any more persuading. He left Kurt to his own devices, trying not to get distracted by the sight of his boyfriend fucking himself on his own fingers. Hurriedly, his hands shaking slightly, he pulled on the condom, slathering it with lube.
Kurt nodded frantically, his usually pristine hair falling carelessly across his brow. His cheeks pink with excitement and his bottom lip caught between his teeth. Puck watched his face intently as he slid into his still tight hole. Watched for any signs of fear or regret or panic, but all he saw was lust and pleasure as Kurt stared back at him.
All at once it was too much. He had to close his eyes, trying not to come too early as he pumped into him. He wanted this to be good for his boyfriend. Wanted his first time to be amazing. So he tried to control his body, until he felt the tensing of Kurt's body and his grunts of satisfaction as his climax hit him. No longer able to hold on, Puck helplessly followed his example. It was more intense than anything he'd ever felt before.
Finally, after they both came down, he tried to slide out.
He looked down at him, warmed by the love in his eyes, and touched by the blush on his face.
"I want to remember this moment. How much I love you… trust you. Everything we've been through together. I still can't believe it led to this. To us."
He felt the tears on his cheeks before he even realized he was crying. Normally, he didn't like looking weak, but with Kurt he didn't care. He could show his true emotions. Be himself.
"There's not been a lot of that in my life before now," Puck said. "Trust, I mean. But here you are...I'm not sure what I did to deserve you." He smiled at the still flushed and gorgeous boy beneath him. "But I sure hope I keep doing it. I love you, Kurt."
Their kisses were sweet and unhurried, as if they were trying to share the same breath. Puck slowly pulled out, ignoring the stickiness between them as he cuddled against his boyfriend and nibbled his chin playfully.
Kurt tightened his hold, and without warning, turned them over so he was the one on top. His look was triumphant.
"Whatcha doin' babe?"
"I don't think you've realized this yet," he said with a smirk as he ran his hands over Puck's muscled chest. "But you've created a monster. A sex-craved monster."
"Sweetie, Puckzilla won't know what hit him when Kurtella gets a hold of him."
"Is that so?" He flexed his fingers before wiggling them in a tickling motion. Kurt scrambled to get away but was not fast enough. Puck dug into the sensitive area underneath his arms, waiting to strike…drawing out the torture. "Well then, babe," he said with a smirk. "Let the battle begin."
As Kurt tried to get away, his giggles filling the room, Puck was suddenly struck by how much things had changed. He had used this boy as a way to dull the pain. To reduce the ache in his heart… the feeling of not being wanted… of not being loved. Trying to overcome the feelings of intense loneliness.
And now they were together and happy and complete.
And neither of them would ever feel that pain again.