A/N: this is just a quick one shot that would not leave me alone!
Disclaimer: Twilight and all its characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, who I am not. Sigh.
I think it's like, totally weird. Nobody knew for the longest time that they were together. I mean, come on, they barely ever touch. I bet that means they don't have sex.
Everyone would whisper about them, but it was freaky 'cause it was like they knew. They'd be walking together and Alice would smile and Jasper would kinda smile in a pained kinda way. Then, she'd look at him, like all sympathetic. Get over yourself Jasper, everyone else has to deal with school too.
I remember when Tyler Crowley asked Alice out and Jasper was right there! It was hilarious. No one knew they were together and Tyler just waltzes up and says "Alice, wanna go out sometime?"
Alice smiled slightly. "I have a boyfriend." She looked up the whole foot to Jasper's angry face. He wrapped his arm possessively around Alice and sneered at Tyler. Then, they turned and walked off down the hall.
As soon as they were out of sight, everyone laughed at Tyler. I think we had all been pretty shocked. Rosalie and Emmett freely made out. I think they even had a few quickies in the broom closet. They made it obvious they were together. It took everyone over three months to find out about Jasper and Alice. I think, if Tyler hadn't made a move, we probably still wouldn't know. That's pretty fucked up, if you ask me.
Jasper and Alice? Well, it's kinda like…they just are, you know? I think it's pretty weird how they're so different, yet they're so happy together. They'll just look at each other and all of sudden it's like all happy-happy-joy-joy. It's actually kind of sickening.
Though I'd never admit it to anyone, Jasper freaked the fuck outta me. Even though Emmett was bigger than Jasper, at least Emmett laughed. Jasper looked like he wanted to murder someone. I felt like that person was going to be me.
It made me feel bad for Alice, kinda. Jasper's so much…bigger than her. He could probably kill her just by looking at her a certain way.
It was strange. They barely ever touched, yet you could almost tell how much they loved each other. I know that's kinda cheesy and gooey, but it was almost like… Well, it was kind of like they were above PDA. It was like they didn't need to prove anything to anybody. That's the only reason for PDA, proving that you were dating someone. Jasper and Alice knew this. They were above this.
If anyone ever found out I thought this, I would be one dead man, that's for sure. And Jasper would be the one killing me. Shit.
Don't even get me started.
They're so superficial and dumb. I bet they aren't really in love. You have to touch to be in love! Kissing, fucking, all that shit, that's love. They're just too stupid to know this.
If I had dated Alice (because I am so much better than Jasper) I would've kissed her in public. That way, everyone would know she was mine. I would be so much better for her because Jasper was creepy and fucking tall. He towers over her while I don't. He's all wrong for her.
But, she has to be stupid and date him. I bet it's just because she doesn't want to hurt his feelings. Whatever. She'll come to me when she wants a real man.
Why should I care? They're just another couple who thinks they're so much better than everyone. Okay, so Jasper's pretty hot, but Alice is just some midget who got lucky when she was adopted by Jasper's foster parents. Isn't that incest? Disgusting.
Oh wait, it wouldn't be incest. If they don't touch, they don't have sex, so it's all good. Still, ew.
I am sooo much prettier than Alice! What does she have that I don't? I mean, seriously, her boobs barely exist. Jasper seriously can't be satisfied with that. He probably wants a real woman, like me. I have longer blonde hair and big boobs. And I'm not almost a legal midget.
But if he wants to take the short route, be my fucking guest. He'll wish Alice was me in a few years.
I don't mind them much. They're just there, you know? Personally, I think Rosalie is so much sexier than Alice. But if I had to describe Jasper and Alice, I'd say that their relationship was peaceful. They weren't constantly jumping each other and sucking each other's faces off. This is a little bit of a relief because eventually, that gets extremely disturbing.
I bet a lot of parents wished their kids were like Jasper and Alice with the no-touching thing. I bet that's why they get to live together, because Dr. and Mrs. Cullen trust them not to get pregnant. I think they're much too responsible to get pregnant.
But I think it'd be pretty cool if they did, because it would be a huge scandal. There hasn't been anything interesting ever since the Cullens got here.
They're incredibly sweet! It's just so adorable when they look at each other. Jasper will look all pained for some reason, but Alice will turn to him and smile. And then Jasper smiles, however briefly.
I think I'm the only person in the whole school (besides the other Cullens) who has ever seen them kiss.
I had gotten out of my last class late because I was talking to Mr. Berty about a project. When I went outside to walk home, I had to cross the parking lot. I was surprised to find Jasper and Alice together.
They hadn't seemed to see me, but they were waiting by Edward's Volvo. Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward were nowhere in sight.
Alice was wrapped in Jasper's arms, her chin resting on his chest. He had leaned down and kissed her, once quickly, before kissing her longer and deeper. Afterwards, she had giggled and reached up to run her fingers through his hair. He had smiled wider than I had ever seen.
I had hated to ruin their moment, so I had turned and walked around the building, taking the long way home.
I don't care what other people say about them, they're just jealous. Everyone wants love like Jasper and Alice's. Anyone with eyes could tell how deeply and utterly in love they are.
It's so romantic. I wish I had someone like Jasper.
I hid my smile behind my fist. Apparently, everyone felt like thinking about Jasper and Alice today.
I glanced at my siblings sitting two rows over and one row back. Jasper was holding on tightly to Alice's hand. She was his support, his rock. I think- know- that without Alice, he would be lost or dead.
Alice looked up to meet my gaze, cocking her head in question.
I shook his head, meaning that I would tell her later.
Alice still looked curious, but she nodded. Quickly, she turned to Jasper. Her fingers ran down his arm in simple comfort. But I could hear how much deference it made.
Hmm, even I'm thinking about them. I guess they are quite the interesting subject.
It's quite laughable that most think they don't have sex. I bit my lip to stop myself from chuckling. Obviously they don't understand marriage.
As soon as I had decided to tell Alice later, she got a vision. She turned to me, hiding her laughter behind her hand. Her shoulders were shaking and her eyes were bright. I smirked at her.
She turned back to Jasper, quietly filling him in. He grinned and I heard his struggle become less and less as his mind shifted to the teenagers in the classroom, thinking about them.
"Do you think I should kiss you in front of Tyler Crowley?" Jasper murmured to Alice.
Alice smirked. "Shame shame Jazz."
Instead, he just kissed her nose, quickly. Tyler Crowley, who was sitting behind them, glared at Jasper.
As if Tyler would ever stand a chance. You just can't break up soul mates. Not unless you want to die.
It is nice to get a new point of view on a subject that seems so retired to me, though.