Sorry, it took me so long to come out with the final chapter to this. It's just that I'm bored of this story and I'm tired of writing it. I know that a handful of people for some inexplicable reason actually care how this will end, and those people will have an ending. It will be an ending of highly debatable quality, but it will be an ending never the less. If, for what ever reason, you are dissatisfied with this ending, I encourage you to write your own. Let me know if you do. I'll list the title and author of alternate endings at the end of the story in "chapter 8" if I get any.
Hiccup kept running. He didn't turn around to see if Wheelbarrel was still chasing him.
"Yea, keep running!" shouted Wheelbarrel from some where in the background. "You can't run from me forever!"
Rocka's husband was passed out on the couch after an afternoon of heavy drinking. He was a morbidly obese man with a peg leg and a tangled blonde beard.
Rocka was rather bored with whatever it was that she thought she was doing that day, so she decided to adopt a new imperatively important objective. She was going to paint a capital letter L on the forehead of her gimpy husband while he slept. (She was really going to do it. She had the paintbrush ready and everything.)
Rocka crept slowly toward him, stooped down carefully, and pressed the paintbrush to his forehead. She heard a door open and slam behind her, but mundane details such as this would not distract her from the crucially important task at hand. She moved her beefy arm upward in a graceful stroke, then downward and to the side, creating a delicate and carefully illuminated capital letter L in permanent red paint.
"R-Rock?" inquired a nasally voice from behind her.
Rocka didn't have to turn around to know who it was.
"Hiccup? What are you doing here?" demanded Rocka almost angrily. She still didn't care enough to turn around.
"Escaping," answered Hiccup. He sounded as though he had been running, but once again Rocka didn't care.
"Can't you see I'm busy here?" grumbled Rocka. "I don't have time for you and your stupid problems."
"Why don't you go talk to Astrid about it," suggested Rocka dismissively. "She likes you, you know."
"She likes me?" repeated Hiccup. He was unable to disguise the enthusiasm in his voice. Even though he had heard the words from Astrid herself he still had trouble believing it.
"Well duh," said Rock. When she said it it sounded so true. "She's literally out of her mind when she's near or around you...or your name is mentioned. It's kind of disgusting."
"Um...thanks, Rocka," said Hiccup and he sprinted from the hut. He had that stupid grin on his face again. He had to see Astrid.
Astrid managed to change out of her disguise and back into her normal clothes before Hiccup met up with her again at her house. He told her that he realized he was working too hard, and she told him that she despised both him and his face.
She decided to give up on the cult scam. Really, that was an incredibly stupid idea to begin with.
Fishlegs gave up on being Goth when he realized that it made him even lamer than he was before.
Rocka's husband got into a fist fight with a guy named Sledgehammer when she told him that it was he who had inscribed the capital letter L on his forehead. This somehow lead to everyone in the bar having a fistfight with every one else. Rocka found this immensely entertaining.
Wheelbarrel had non-consensual sex with a forest of pine trees.