Chapter numero eight.
I looked up at Edward and he was staring at me. Patiently waiting. Where do I even start? From the beginning is a good place, I guess.
"Two years ago, during my freshman year something happened." I stopped and took a breath. I knew Edward would not hate me for this. I knew it. But I just couldn't believe it. I still held on to that little fear.
"It was an accident. And it took me a long time to realize that. It was a Saturday afternoon. It wasn't even dark out. But it was rainy and wet. My mom and I had gone to the grocery store. I was fifteen then, so I was hellbent on learning how to drive. I just pestered my mom into letting me drive home until she finally relented. I wasn't going fast. I wasn't doing anything dangerous, and yet it still happened. We were driving past a road when someone hit us from the side. They tried to stop but they hydroplaned and lost control. It hit on my mom's side and she died instantly. I, on the other hand, was in a coma for three days. I didn't even remember. My dad had retell me the story."
I couldn't look up at Edward. I couldn't do anything. My eyes were trained on the table.
After a moment of silence I felt someone sit next to me and wrap their arms around me. I realized it was Edward and I leaned in. Inhaling his scent while he just held me. I didn't cry, but I wanted to. I knew if I cried Edward would probably run kicking and screaming.
We sat like that for a while. I felt him place his hand under my chin and moved it so I had to look at him. And he didn't let go.
"You know, I expected you to tell me that you had an embarrassing moment or something. I didn't expect anything like that, and I'm terribly sorry. If I were in your position, I would be in a hole right now wallowing in self-pity. You're much stronger then me."
I smiled at him and nodded, not sure what to say.
"Are you hungry?" Edward asked.
Just when he asked my stomach growled. "I could eat."
And we had a nice, relaxing dinner. We didn't approach the topic again and we didn't need to. It was out there. We both had no more secrets.
After my dinner with Edward, I went home and I thought. I thought about a lot of things. I thought about my mom. I thought about my dad. I thought about what I wanted to do when I left this god forsaken town.
And I realized a lot things.
I didn't have a hand in my mom's death. It took me three years to realize that I didn't cause my mother to lose her life. It was just a freak accident.
I realized that even though my dad and I don't have a normal relationship, I know he's there for me. I know that if I fell down, he'd be right there.
I realized that I cared for Edward. I didn't know how much I cared for him but I knew it was a little more than friends. I didn't know how to tell him. I'd never had to do anything like this before, but I knew that I had to tell him. I'd been living in the shade for so long I'd forgotten what the sun felt like. I wanted to do something for me.
I woke up the next morning feeling very light. I'd gone through a lot of mental blocks last night and now I was just ready to be free. I'd decided last night that I was going to tell Edward today that I liked him more than friends. He hadn't officially said he liked me, but I knew he did. I just wanted to be the one to make it 'official.'
I found myself walking with a little more pep to my step as I got ready. I would catch myself humming and then do a little dance sometimes.
I wish I'd had this epiphany years ago.
When I met up with Edward at school he was sitting in his car, drinking some coffee. I knocked on his window and I must have scared him because he jumped and hit his head on the roof, spilling his coffee on him. I could tell he was pissed, but when he saw that it was me he smiled and got out of the car.
"Thanks for making me look like a fool." He commented.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I like fools."
He smiled and grabbed my hand. I took it as encouragement.
"So I've got a secret."
Edward raised his eyebrows at me. "Another one?"
I shook my head. "This is one I think you want to hear."
I leaned into his ear, where our faces were so close I could feel his hair tickling my cheek.
"I like you," I whispered.
Edward shivered and wrapped his arms around me, bringing me into another hug. I smiled and I wrapped my arms around him too.
"You're in luck, I like you too." He said.
I smiled and I went to peck him on the cheek. He pulled back surprised.
"You're very affectionate today," he commented, leading me towards the school.
"I realized some things last night after our talk."
"And they were?"
I stopped and turned to him. "I realized I didn't want to dwell on the things I can't control."
Edward smiled down at me and I smiled back.
We walked hand in hand to class, joking about who was the bigger fool for who.
Last chapter before the epilogue. Sorry for the no update. Five AP classes and marching band and work kind of took over my life.
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