Waluigi moaned weakly as he opened his eyes, smacking his lips together as he looked down, to see that he was roped. Next to him by his left was Popo, who was still out cold as he was, too, tied. The two characters were tied to the chocolate interior walls of the sugary mountain, a dark shadow appearing as it chuckled deeply.
"Wha... where are we?" Waluigi asked as the dark shadow leapt towards them, chuckling evilly. "And who the hell are you?"
"Welcome... to YOUR ULTIMATELY ULTIMATERY ULTIMATORY ULTIMATE DOOM DOOMY DOOMINISH DOOMERY DOOMINY DOOMINIX DOOMINATERY DOOMINOY DOOM OF DOOM!" The dark shadow announced as he revealed his true form... Toon Link. "And now that you're here, I can tickle you for all its worth! Tee hee hee hee!"
Waluigi eyed Toon Link oddly. "Wait a minute, YOU'RE the bad guy who tied us?" He asked in disbelief.
Toon Link laughed evilly as he placed his hands on his stomach, telling Waluigi as he pointed at the tall lanky man, "I simply wanted to do something cruel for once in my happy go lucky life, so I pushed you and Popo down the hole..." He touched his fingertips as he giggled. "And now that you're in here... we can waste two thousand words on absolutely nothing!"
Waluigi continued eyeing Toon Link bizarrely. "Wait... wasting the word count?" He tilted his head to the right in confusion. "Isn't that... the stupidest thing any respected author could do?"
Toon Link gulped as sweat started coming down his head. "Uhh... well..." He nervously chuckled as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. "I couldn't honestly think of anything else to do, so I was thinking of-"
"Wasting the word count. Way to go, genius." Waluigi flatly taunted as he rolled his eyes.
Toon Link started stuttering nervously. "H-h-hey! We're only just barely three hundred words into this chapter! You can't just go and dismiss this very important event!" He blabbered as he flailed his arms.
Waluigi sighed as he continued struggling to move within the ropes. "Yeah, but if you want to excite the readers, you should have something interesting." He glanced at Popo, who was still out cold. "Plus, if the author honestly doesn't feel like writing, he should just give up and go do something else."
"Like play video games," Toon Link suggested as he smiled, letting out a silent but deadly fart.
"Or go out into the sunlight and get some fresh air," Waluigi added as he smugly smirked.
A few seconds of awkward silence occurred as Toon Link coughed, rubbing the back of his neck.
"So... uhhh..." Toon Link started as he looked around, "Want some candy?"
"...Candy?" Popo randomly stated as he opened his eyes, blinking as he looked down, to see that was he tied to the walls, and then glanced to his left at Waluigi, seeing him tied as well. He then looked forward, seeing Toon Link. He gasped as he proclaimed, "Wait a minute! Toon Link! What are you doing here!"
Toon Link giggled as he rubbed his hands together. "Teehee! I'm now evil! Couldn't you tell!" He proclaimed as he posed sexually.
Popo blinked in astonishment as he felt a strange sensation... in his pants. "Umm... I feel wet... and stiff..." He mumbled as he slightly blushed.
Waluigi felt like face palming himself as he struggled to get his left hand out. "Ugh, Popo, why are you getting a boner from Toon Link? He's a boy!"
Popo quickly realized this fact, and he blushed even more. "Wow... that makes this situation... very awkward..."
Toon Link was in complete dismay as his arms were pointed down straight, in complete shock from Popo getting aroused about him. "Popo... got a boner... from me...!" He proceeded to giggle like an innocent schoolgirl as he started skipping towards the east. "Well, quite frankly, I make a cute girl if you think about it-"
"Come on, why won't this break?" Waluigi growled as he continued having problems with the rope. He closed his eyes as he tried performing his Waluigi Tornado, eventually breaking out of the rope as he also broke Popo out from his ropes. Halting his spinning, Waluigi fell on his two feet as he heroically posed, running after Toon Link and beating up the young boy.
"Well... this stinks." Toon Link admitted as he gulped, his entire body trembling with fright.
Popo nodded as he folded his arms, approaching Toon Link as he smirked. "It sure does, doesn't it?"
Toon Link glanced to the left and right, before looking back at Popo and Waluigi. "Well, I would love to stay and chat, but..." He turned around and dashed as fast as he could. "GOTTA RUN!" He then crashed into a pile of pinkish sugar.
Popo and Waluigi both glanced at each other as Toon Link groaned weakly in pain.
"Well... this sure seems like a pickle of a problem," Popo stated as he wrapped his shoulders behind his back, whistling innocently.
Waluigi nodded as he rubbed his chin. "Indeed you are right, Popo. Now... let's get out of here..." He started climbing the interior wall to the north, with Popo gathering as much sugar as he could.
Several long minutes of climbing out of the interior of the sugary mountain later, an exhausted Waluigi and Popo made it to the very top, overlooking the western direction as they tried catching their breath. Popo apparently had a bit too much candy from the mountain, as he acted a tad different than usual.
"We barely reached two thousand words for this chapter..." Popo commented as he placed his hands on his kneecaps, gasping for breath as he wiped his face with his left elbow.
Waluigi adjusted his traditional purple-colored cap as he stretched his long, lanky arms in the air. "It doesn't matter, Popo. We already finished our adventure by the time the previous chapter ended." He pointed out as he looked up at the clear blue sky, the sun shining brightly down on them and the sugary mountain.
Popo gasped as he glanced at Waluigi, placing his hands together as he had cutesy puppy eyes. "R-really?" He whimpered cheerfully as his eyes wobbled.
Waluigi stared blankly at Popo, sighing as he shook his head, closing his eyes. "Yes, really. Now... all we need to do is find out how we're going to get back to the Super Smash Brothers Mansion."
Popo wondered deeply as he folded his arms, shaking his head as he wondered about something. He then snapped his fingers as he smiled, turning to face Waluigi. "Well, I suggest that we take a left turn down towards the mountain, then head into the jungles nearby and fight off the evil mutant bananas, then take a boat into the wide open sky and grab some fluffy clouds for our arousing pleasure, then we trap several hippos in a container filled with lotsa spaghetti, then we pour red hot sauce on your stomachs and slide all around the meadows, drop several bombs on the lamp oil that are constantly groping the rope, attempt an oil spill all over Termina Bay, reach the resevior with rocket fueled jet skis, bring it on as we go for the silver, let's have some fun as this should be fun, naturally snatch yatchs planted, separate the yellow blocks from the red, green, and blue blocks, try to pathetically increasethe word count so we can rush this chapter out of the door and end this random one-shot fanfic even though it has more than one chapter in it, try and make our readers lose a false sense of security, advertise our products everywhere so we get a million hits regardless of the quality, think of something better to say rather than blabbering this out for no apparant reason, and finally, we eat a lot of car gasoline and use it to fart to fly around." It made the least sense ever since Popo joined the Super Smash Brothers, but it sounded more complicated than Popo's previous random statements.
"...Are you positive that you weren't born with a defect?" Waluigi stated as he pointed at Popo, his right eye twitching in disgust,
Popo stared at Waluigi, placing his left hand over his mouth as he chuckled in a deep tone of voice. "Ohohoho, Waluigi, you seem to be dismissing my elegant features." He spoke in a British accent, shrugging as he closed his eyes, shaking his head with a disapproving smirk. "Of course, seeing as how you never climbed up high, cold mountains for several long, harsh years it may explain why you don't seem keen on this idea."
Waluigi dropped his arms like anchors as he continued giving Popo the oddest glance he ever gave, "Popo, you're not making any sense at all." Waluigi pointed out the obvious.
Popo placed his hands on his hips as he glared at Waluigi. "And what sense does it make if it is to not make sense, mah boi? Are we nothing but mere illusions casted upon this faint planet, to do nothing but stand and breathe?" He suggested as he stroked his chubby little chin.
Waluigi slapped his forehead as he pulled a frying pan out of his back right overalls pocket, smashing his face with it. "...I gave away all my frickin' free time for this... what have I done...?" He muttered in dismay as he continued smashing his face, obviously not feeling the pain that normally he would and should be feeling from every hard smack.
Popo waved his hands at Waluigi, shaking his head as he dismissed Waluigi's statement. "Nonsense, my chap. After all, by simply increasing the word count with our rather illogical blabber, we are increasing the word count." He then opened his eyes as he placed his left hand on his stomach, laughing with dignity. "And jolly ho, if I do say so myself, we are doing such a splendid job, we may just overall past the two thousand word mark." He sighed heavenly as he closed his eyes, sniffing the fresh air. "Why, I can smell the huge number of words contained in this chapter already." He briefly paused, placing his right index finger on his chin as he had a perplexed look on his kawaii face. "Or... did I just dealt a fart and shook it off like it never happened?"
Waluigi tossed away the frying pan into the depths of the sugary mountain as he continued staring at Popo with a disgruntled face, his arms still side by side like anchors. "Can we please just finish this damn fanfic and go home?"
Popo approached Waluigi and patted the older man on the head, simply shaking his head. "Waluigi, my chap, you must not be so hesitant to rush. Delay does help in crafting perfection."
"This is downright embarrassing." Waluigi simply lamp shaded as he glared at the computer screen.
Popo shook his head in disagreement, scratching his butt with his left hand as he placed his right hand on Waluigi's right shoulder. "But it 'tis be not embarrassing, my fellow comrade, Mr. Waluigi sir. This would be a sensation beyond sensation!" He exclaimed as he opened his arms to the sky.
"...That... doesn't... even... make... sense..." Waluigi remarked as his entire face was literally twitching.
Popo smashed Waluigi in the head with his mallet, shaking his left index finger at Waluigi as he closed his eyes, chuckling.
"Mister Professor Doctor Saint President King Husband Sir Waluigi The Great, mah boi, it seems that you disagree," Popo stated as he dragged the knocked out Waluigi behind him, heading downhill the exterior path extending out of the sugary pink-colored mountain as he stated with glee, "Oh well, I guess it's just a little late to be going out on such a date! Teeheeheeheehee!"
Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: Actually, I just wanted to add twenty words to this. Because I'm a very very lazy jack ass. Or am I really?