Shinji was cursing himself as he waited with his parents in the waiting room of the hospital. This is the second time in as many weeks that Asuka has been in this place. The first time was because of her being attacked when her parents were murdered, and now because she tried to commit suicide. He sat on the hard plastic chair; his shirt was still wet and soaked with blood... Asuka's blood… It was a quarter till five in the morning and Asuka has been in surgery for only about a half hour.
[Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!] Shinji cursed himself. [How could I let this happen! I should've known something was wrong with Asuka! I should have known! How could I just let my hormones get in the way like that! How could I be so stupid? How can I protect everyone in the world if I can't even protect my own friends? I'm useless…] The same feelings of uselessness started to wash over as they did before, before his revelation of Third Impact, or more precisely, the Non-Third Impact. When he; in his other life, recreated the world so that everyone in his life could experience happiness and joy. He wanted everyone to live normal lives, but now, everything is falling apart, the Angels were back, people were dyeing and Asuka in lying in a hospital Operating Room. [I can't even help my best friend… What good am I…]
"Mr. and Mrs. Ikari?" came a voice from outside the lobby.
All three of them looked up and saw a familiar face; it was the same old doctor that had originally treated Shinji and Asuka from before. In his heart Shinji had hoped to never see the old man again, not that he didn't like the guy, he was a nice old man, but he just didn't want to be in this place anymore. He was dressed in a traditional looking surgeon's robe with blood stains on them, a hair cap or whatever it was called, and latex gloves which he was now pulling off his hands.
"Doctor, how is Asuka? Is she going to be okay?" Yui asked with tear filled eyes.
"She's going to live." Said the doctor as the Ikari's felt a sense of relief come over them.
"Is she awake? Can we see her?" Asked Shinji eagerly, wanting to see his friend.
"No, not yet; she's still asleep from the anesthetic. However, she should recover from it in a few hours. She's lost a lot of blood and we've had to replace it, but she'll be fine. We were lucky actually." Said the doctor
"How so?" asked Gendo
"Well the blade she used to slit her wrists was sharp and it cut deep, however, she cut her wrists horizontally instead of vertically. Had she done so vertically, we would have been too late to save her life." The doctor stated
"I don't understand, how is that lucky?" asked Yui
"Well, to put it quite simply, the arteries in your wrists run vertically and when you cut them, it is far more efficient to cut them vertically; from a completely medical standpoint you see. But when you try to cut them horizontally, you have to cut through the layers of cartilage and bone in order to get to your arteries. It's possible but you have to put more effort into it. But when you do it vertically, you actually cut in between them instead. Again this is from a medical standpoint only, I would never advise anyone who is trying to commit suicide on how to it properly." Said the doctor
"But she is going to be alright…" said Shinji
"Yes, at least physically. She's going to have to stay here in the hospital for a while for her to heal properly. Mentally however, that's a whole different story. I've requested that she'll be put on a suicide watch. She'll have a guard outside her room at all time and nurses will check in on her constantly. Plus there will also be a psychiatrist assigned to her to make an evaluation of her mental state." He said
"Is that really necessary doctor?" asked Yui
"I'm afraid it is Mrs. Ikari. With her recent history; her parents being murdered in front of her, and with what you told me earlier when she was brought in about her grandparents being killed… And of course with her suicide attempt…" The doctor trailed off
"We understand doctor." Said Gendo
Kensuke was typing furiously away on the keyboard of his school issued laptop, his excitement bordering on madness. "Oh man I can't believe this, this is so cool." He said to himself.
"What is?" Asked Toji
"The Eva, man." Kensuke said simply
"Huh, what website are you on?" he asked
"It's a forum about the Eva, they're people from all over the world talking about it."
"Then what's so cool about it? I mean it's just people talking about it, it doesn't mean that they actually know anything. If you really want to know more about it then you should ask Shinji. He's the one who pilot's it you know." Said Toji
"Oh man, you don't get it do you?" Kensuke smirked. "Some of these people who are on this forum are actually from Gehirn… I mean Nerv, now that they've been taken over and stuff, anyway, some of these people on the forum are the actual scientists that are studying and running tests on it and stuff." He exclaimed
"Uh-huh… And what makes you think that these "scientists" are the real deal anyway man. I mean, they could just be lying about themselves in order to draw attention you know." Said Toji, doubtful about the authenticity of the 'sources.'
"I don't think so, well not all of them anyway, but there are some that sound like they know what they're talking about. For instance…" Kensuke said as he brought up the page he was looking for. "Look at this one man, this person here says that the Eva is actually a living creature underneath the armor, it has a body structure similar to human and that the DNA sequence is ninety-seven percent the same. Everyone else was saying that it had to be some sort of giant robot that was secretly constructed by the government. But this person says that they actually found it orbiting on the dark side of the moon!"
"Okay…" Toji said raising an eyebrow questioningly.
"Then there's this one, it says that the monsters that attacked the city weren't actually aliens, this person says that the 'monsters' were actually creatures from another dimensional plain of existence and that the UN along with the Japanese government have dubbed them as 'Angels.' I mean come one man, not all of this has to be false." Kensuke said
"Uh-huh? Nevertheless, I again must ask the same question… What makes you think that this person is the real deal? Have you asked Shinji or his dad about the Eva? Unless it comes from either one of them, I'm not going to believe anything on the internet that talks about it." Said Toji
"Alright fine then, when Shinji comes in this morning I'm going to ask him." Said Kensuke
"I'm surprised you haven't already." Toki smirked
"Hey man, with everything that's been going on since those monsters attacked the city, I just didn't think it was all that proper you know. First Shinji gets hauled off to Gehirn, gets interrogated, then Gehirn gets taken over by Nerv and is now a part of the UN military, which makes it even harder for Shinji to talk about stuff. Then everything thats happened with Asuka and her parents getting killed right before all of that, and her having to move in with Shinji's family and stuff. I mean that's a lot of things in a fairly short amount of time you know." Said Kensuke
"Hmm, I guess you're right, it hasn't been that long either since those attacks occurred now that I think about it. Hell, it's been less than a month actually…" Toji said, now in deep thought
Just then, Hikari and Rei came into the class. "Hey guys, what are you two talking about now?" Said Hikari as she spotted Kensuke typing away feverishly on his keyboard.
"Well Kensuke has been has been on the internet researching about 'Big Purple' and trying to convince me that the Eva is some sort of living creature and that the aliens are actually 'Angels' or something like that. To tell you the truth I kind of blocked some of it out." Said Toji
"What? Again? Kensuke why don't you just ask Shinji about the Eva when he comes in class today. I'm sure he must know a lot more about than some people on the internet." Said Rei as she and Hikari took their seats.
"That's what I said." Said Toji
"Yeah Kensuke just ask Shinji, I mean he is the only person to pilot it and he does have access to Gehirn you know. I'm sure he know a lot of stuff about the Eva. He's a much more reliable source than people on the internet."Said Hikari
"Number one…" Kensuke began as he straightened in his chair and adjusted his glasses, "Gehirn doesn't exist anymore, it was officially taken over by Nerv some time ago and is under the authority of the UN… Number two, I don't appreciate the level of skepticism being portrayed from everyone. I think that I am intelligent enough to figure out the lies and falsehoods about the Eva unit, from the truth on my own … Number three, why can't you guys just let me have my fun anyway. It's not like that my enthusiasm over the Evangelion is hurting anyone, nor is it that I'm pressuring anyone to believe in the same things about the Eva as I do. If you choose to believe it, then all the better, but if not then so be it. In other words, kindly leave ME, and my fanboy enthusiasm about the Eva alone please… Thank you." Kensuke snorted and went straight back to the screen on his laptop.
"Well then, I believe we should leave Eva's number-one fan alone for the moment, what do you think girls?" Said Toji
"If Kensuke chooses to be rude about then fine, we should just let him be alone with it then. I mean we were only trying to be helpful about it and give him some suggestions about the thing that's all. Let the fanboy have his fantasy." Hikari huffed and turned in her seat.
"I can still hear you, you know." Kensuke said, not even bothering to life his head over his laptop screen.
Before Hikari could fire back however, Misato, who was dressed in a form fitting black halter top with a nearly form fitting white blouse and skin-tight jeans, walked into class to begin the day, and Hikari, being the class rep performed her duties without hesitation. "Stand! Bow! Sit!"
"Good morning class." said Misato.
"Good morning Miss Katsuragi." The class replied in unison, the boys of course, saying it with more energy than the girls, as their eyes couldn't themselves but to glaze over dreamily in awe of the hottest teacher in all of Tokyo-3.
"Ugh… Men" said Hikari in a whispered tone.
"Now before we begin the class today I want to start out by saying that I received a phone call this morning from Shinji's mother, and she informed me neither Shinji nor Asuka would be coming in to class today." Said Misato
"Ms. Katsuragi, did she say why?" asked Rei, who was now a little concerned over why Ms. Katsuragi would even be making an announcement like this unless something had happened to them.
Misato sighed and lowered her head slightly before looking back at the class, "She wouldn't go into details, but she did say that Asuka was in the hospital currently undergoing surgery."
The class gasped…
"Oh my god, what happened?" said Hikari
"Like I said, Mrs. Ikari didn't go into any detail about what happened, but from the way she was speaking she sounded very distraught over it. I suggest that everyone who wants to, to go and visit her at the hospital after school today. I'm sure she would appreciate it very much." Said Misato.
Shinji was sitting next to her bed in the recovery room, Asuka was still asleep from her surgery and would not awake for the next few hours, the doctor had told him. But he insisted that he's be there for her and refused to leave. The doctor understood and informed the nursing staff. Gendo had to go into work and Yui had a few moments before to get something for them to eat. Shinji welcomed the gesture but doubted that he would be eating much.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door. "Come in." Said Shinji and was surprised to see Kaworu walk in.
"Hello Shinji." He said
"Kaworu, what are you doing here?" Shinji asked
"I wanted to see how you were doing, and more importantly, how Asuka was doing." Kaworu stated, taking the seat in the corner.
"Well I'm fine… I guess, but Asuka… She hasn't woken up yet, but the doctors said she will be fine. They stopped the bleeding and were able to repair all the damage. But they're going to put her on a suicide watch, and have a psychiatrist take a look at her when she is well to do so." Said Shinji, his face an open book of sadness.
"You must not blame yourself Shinji; it was not your fault. You did not cause this to her, do you understand?" Kaworu said trying to console Shinji
"Of course it's my fault, everything is my fault. I wasn't there to help her, I wasn't there to stop them from killing her parents or her grandparents. If I can't even help Akusa, my best friend, then how can I possibly help the city, let alone the entire world, from the Angels? I'm useless…" Shinji said with his head slumped downwards.
All of the same negative feelings came rushing back to him as he thought of what was happening, however, all of those bad feelings suddenly stopped and were replaced by pain when he suddenly went flying across the room and crashed into the wall. Clutching the side of his face, it throbbed violently, he could feel it swelling underneath his palm and he looked up to see an enraged Kaworu glaring back at him.
Kaworu grabbed Shinji by the scruff of his collar and held up against the wall, "Now you listen to me Shinji Ikari, I will not hear any of that kind of talk coming from you do you understand me! There is too much at stake to allow yourself to wallow in your own self-pity and shame. That's what the Angels want from you and you're playing right into their hands. They want you to doubt yourself, they want you to feel useless and powerless just as you did before in your previous life, because doing so will make you weaker to fight them. Do you understand! This is not your fault, this is their fault and it is up to you to stop them! Do you understand me Shinji Ikari!" Shouted Kaworu, his red eyes glowing brightly.
"How can I do that! I had Asuka and Rei to back me up before, but now I'm on my own!" Shinji shot back
"You're not on your own, and you're not like how you were before don't you get it. You're different, you've changed!" Yelled Kaworu
"Just because I got older doesn't mean that I've changed!" Said Shinji
"That's not what I mean." Said Kaworu as he released Shinji from his grip. "I mean you've changed both physically and spiritually. And I don't mean just by getting older either…" Kaworu sighed as he thought of a way to tell Shinji, and what implications it would have on the rest of his life. "You're one of us now…"
"What? What is that supposed to mean?" he asked
"I mean exactly what I said Shinji… You're one of us now… You're an Angel, like me, or at least half-angel anyway." Said Kaworu
Shinji couldn't believe what he was hearing, Kaworu was actually telling him that he was an Angel, and he didn't want to believe it.
"What the hell are you saying? That's not possible? I can't be an Angel!" said Shinji
Kaworu slowly turned his gaze back at Shinji, seeing the distress in his eyes. But it couldn't be helped, he had to know the truth. "Yes it is possible, and yes you are one of us Shinji. I know you don't want to believe it, but it's true… You are Adam."