A/N: I showed my editor the list and she personally picked this one for me to do next. So here it is Theme 31 Home cooking. :D I figured Roy would get his personality from Chris, best adoptive mother ever. Anyone else read the final chapter of Fullmetal? It makes me sad to know I no longer have the chance to read such an amazing work, and I look forward to the future and many more amazing fanfics.

Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist is not mine, if it was the last scene would have had Roy and Riza's wedding picture in it.

Theme: 031. Home cooking *Spoilers for up to Chapter eighty-seven* (Why yes I do feel the need to type out my numbers)

Riza had banished Roy from the Kitchen. She was not in the mood for Roy's antics today.

After all Chris Mustang, Roy's mother, was coming for a visit. No matter how long they had been married and how ever many visits Riza had lived through, the times when Roy's mother did decide to make an appearance were always stressful.

Roy was currently standing in the door frame of the kitchen looking like a dejected puppy. While his son, Maes, helped Riza mix bread dough, and Black Hayate kept him from sneaking back in, Roy felt quite peeved.

He dangled his foot over the threshold, Black Hayate let out a bark before promptly biting down on Roy's socked foot. He winced before bring his foot back from over the threshold.

"Damn dog…" Roy cursed under his breath praying his son didn't pick up anymore of his phrases. Maes merely giggled as his mother removed the dough from his hands, giving Roy hope that his only son hadn't heard his curse as he began to slink away.

"Damn dog!" Maes exclaimed all too happy to show off his newly learned vocabulary.

"Roy make yourself useful and stir this stew," Riza groaned as Roy placed his hand on the small of her back.

"You shouldn't strain yourself Riza. It isn't good for you or the baby." Roy moved his hand from her back to stomach. She was eight months along and Roy did worry for her, but wanted to keep his distance at times. Some pregnant woman were moody, others were sick more than others, Riza tended to be very angry, or overly calm; it varied from day to day (or in some cases hour to hour).

Riza nodded before making her way to the nearest chair, Maes and Black Hayate following at her heels. Roy was left alone in the kitchen, stirring a pot full of stew…alone.

Riza rested in one of the large plush armchairs in the den, not willing to stray too far from the kitchen or front door. Chris Mustang, her mother-in-law only came once a year, and each time she tried as hard as she could to make it civil and not bring up the burning of her club, which happened years ago.

Of course said incident was caused by Roy in attempt to cover his tracks, and he did pay for her to rebuild the club. It somehow managed to be the focus of conversation every year.

A knock at the door signaled Riza that Chris Mustang was here. Roy turned off the burner and helped his wife out of the chair, before opening the door to a very peeved woman.

"It's about time Roy." She smirked before pulling him into a hug; Maes motioned for her to pick him up. Riza lagged behind slowly making her way to the door. Chris looked her over before speaking to Roy.

"Couldn't keep in your own pants, eh?" She glanced, over at Roy as she placed her free hand on Riza's stomach.

"Well mom I'm sure you're hungry. Want some stew?" Roy forced a smile, hoping his son wouldn't ask questions.

"Of course, I've been in that damn taxi for an hour, and skipped lunch." Riza sighed; this was also the time her son picked up some more interesting language.

Food was soon placed on the table, and the Mustang family began to eat. Roy and his mother soon began a heated argument over her bar, Maes tossing food to Black Hayate below, and Riza slowly eating and trying to keep her cool, thankful her mother-in-law would be gone in the morning.

E/N: Ha! My favorite line has to be "Couldn't keep in your own pants, eh?" HAHAHAHAHA! But that's just me…what about you, oh fair reader? Why don't you tell us! All you must do is click that wonderfully tempting review button which just so happens to be located under this wonderfully wonderful Editor's Note!