Standard Disclaimer Applied

AU Warning up ahead. :x

(A/N: Zoey101 and Fairly OddParents as reference xD)

Ino's Convoluted Plan

By: maRshmAll0W rosEs

"Sasuke, you and Neji are going to have a new roommate arriving today, please don't try to kill him, or there will be hell to pay."

Sasuke and Neji frowned.

"You're sending us the dobe aren't you?"

She smirked. "Go find out for yourself, Uchiha."

"Like OH MY GAWD did you hear about the new student?"

"I heard he's the captain of the soccer team in his last school."

The girl squealed, "Another hottie added in our school, Tsunade-sama must love us a lot!"

"Yeah! But what does he look like?"

"I bet he has wonderful eyes."

"I bet he has an awesome hair like Sasuke-kun or Neji-kun."

Both girls sighed dramatically, "I hope he's not taken."

Oh how wrong you will be…soon –evil laughter-

Ino walked past the talking girls and grinned, "New student, huh? Well let's see about that."

She sat beside Tenten and started gossiping, "So you heard about the new guy?"

Sakura frowned, "Yeah I know him, Naruto Uzumaki."

Tenten gaped, "You mean the guy who killed your pet fish while you were away in camp?"

"Yeah, him."

Hinata sweatdropped, "I'm sure that was an accident Sakura-chan."

Sakura scowled, "He forgot to feed it for 2 weeks. That asshole, I punched him in the face after what he did to my poor fish."

Ino laughed, "Shouldn't your parents be the one to take care of your pet while you're away?"

"Business trip to some country and all the helpers are on vacation. There's no one home to take care of my pet."

"And you entrusted the task to him…knowing that he would forget it."

"I was in a hurry okay?"

Tenten chuckled and looked at her watch, "Sorry ladies, but I gotta go. I have a date with Neji to Chemistry."

Ino smirked, "Avoid the Janitor's closet for a while Ten-chan, Kabuto-sensei doesn't like anyone being late."

Tenten stuck her tongue out at her.

"So did you tell Sasuke that his bestest buddy is his new roomie?"

Sakura grimaced, "No way, he'd go on a killing spree if I told him and besides, Tsunade-sama told me not to. So all's good."


Sakura stopped walking making Hinata and Ino looked at her nervously.

"Oh shit."

She started to speed up.


Ino glanced at the person, "Hm, he's kinda cute, don't you think so Hina-chan?"

Hinata blushed, "W-what? I-ino—"

Ino smiled, "Don't worry I won't tell you have a crush on him. Right forehead?"

Sakura nodded.

Naruto caught up to them.

"Hi! My name's Naruto Uzumaki, dattebayo!"

Sakura sighed, "They already know moron."


"N-nice to m-meet you U-uzumaki-kun."

Naruto blinked, Sakura smacked herself.

"She's Hinata and the blonde is Ino."

Naruto grinned at Hinata and said, "Nice to meet you too, Hinata-chan!"

Hinate tried her hardest not to blush.

He scratched his head and smiled nervously, "So…can you show me around? I'm kinda new here."

Ino smiled and looked at the clock, "Well, what do you know, I have a date with Shika to go to. See you later!"

Sakura also smiled and pushed Hinata to Naruto, "Sasuke-kun needs me so I gotta go too, why not let Hinata show you around?"

Hinata blushed 10x more, "E-eh? B-but I-i…"

Naruto grinned, "Sure, why not. Let's go Hinata-chan!"

"Um…N-naruto-kun? Can we eat first?"

"Ehehehe, sure Hinata-chan, I'm hungry too!"

"W-wanna go eat some ramen?"

Naruto gasped and drooled, "They sell ramen here?"

Hinata giggled, "No, but I'll cook some for us. The cook here is my friend, so he'll let me use his kitchen."

By now, Naruto had hearts on his eyes, "I love you Hinata-chan!"

She blushed and prayed to Kami-sama for her not to faint.

"Oh and I really like your laugh, Hina-chan."

Hinata would've fainted then and there if Naruto hadn't taken her hand and drag her to the cafeteria's kitchen.

"No! N-naruto-kun! Don't touch tha-"


Naruto blinked at Hinata.

Hinata stared and blushed.

"A-are you a-alright N-naruto-kun?"

Naruto laughed loudly and grinned at her, "Don't worry Hina-chan, I'm still alive. That didn't hurt me at all."

Yes, that didn't hurt him at all he says. So when he stood up, he wobbled to Hinata and Hinata had to drop the dishes to catch his falling form.

The students outside the kitchen thought the new kid kissed Hinata and decided to take pictures of it.

Did I mention the cook was like o_o to the chaos Naruto caused?

By the time Naruto was sent to the infirmary. The entire population of girls who have gone gaga over Naruto crowded the door outside his room.

"Move away people!" Ino's loud voice echoed.

The girls didn't move.


The girls parted like red sea.

Sakura shrank back from being a demon to her usual self (what's the difference?), "Thank you!" she beamed.

Hinata was startled when she heard the door banged open and Ino and Sakura came flying through it.

"OMG Hinata you sly dog!"

"I didn't think you'd go farther than flirting with him!"

Hinata was like o_O and said, "I didn't flirt with him! I was going to cook ramen for him but he touched something and it blew up…"

Sakura smacked her forehead, "Tell Naruto to stop touching something and he ends up doing it anyway."

Ino grinned like a Cheshire cat, "So what's this I've heard that he kissed you, Ms. Hyuuga?"

Sakura gasped.

Hinata laughed nervously, "He didn't k-kiss me! He fell on me—"

Ino and Sakura gasped again.

Crap! Hinata thought and tried to explain again, "What I mean is, he fainted that's why I have to drop the dishes and catch him…The students outside thought he kissed me from their angle."

Ino giggled, "Yeah right."

Sakura smacked Ino's head, "It's true you dolt. I just called the cook."

Apparently, the cook is fond of gossiping…like Ino.

"Ow, forehead, what the hell!"

"Shut up pig, now Hinata has to deal with the rumor you caused!" Sakura whispered.

HInata seemed to have transformed into demon mode and slowly looked at their direction like a creepy doll.

"What. Did. You. Say?"

"Oh shit." Was all Ino could say.

Sakura had never known that Hinata could imitate a hungry fox attacking its prey up until now.

"Hey Uchiha, do you think that the idiot is our new roommate?"

"Hn. I don't know, Sakura would usually tell me what Tsunade's hiding but she won't talk."

Both of them stopped walking when they heard the commotion in the infirmary.

A fangirl stopped shrieking and fainted when she saw Sasuke and Neji walked towards her.

The rest of the girls also stopped and glared at the girl but before they can pounce the two, Sakura, Ino and Hinata came out of the room.

"Oh my gosh Hinata when did you and the new guy clicked?"

"Hinata! Stop hogging the new guy, we want him too!"


Neji turned at the girl and glared, "Stay away from Hinata-sama unless you want to be expelled."

"Neji-niisan, it's alright. I can protect myself."

Sakura growled at the girls, "GET OUT OF THE WAY OR I'LL EAT YOU!"

Sasuke smirked and held her by the waist, "Stay."

She blushed and quieted down.

"Good girl." Sasuke whispered to her.

"Tch. Slut." Ami scoffed.

Before Sasuke can hold Sakura back, Ami was thrown to the wall.

"Uzumaki-san! You have to stay in the infirmary!"

"Shut up! Where's Hinata-chan?"

Hinata blushed.


Naruto ran to Hinata and hugged her, much to Neji's dismay.

"I'm sorry I blew up a part of the kitchen."

Sakura and Ino were like in cloud nine when watching them.

Hinata smiled softly, "It's fine, I-I'm glad that you're alright…"

A fangirl just had to ruin the moment, "So, your heart ALREADY belongs to her?"

Naruto grinned and whispered something to Hinata's ear.

Neji was secretly starting counting down Naruto's remaining life.

Thankfully Tenten passed by and dragged Neji away to Chemistry.

6:00PM- Konoha Academy Open Field

"This had been a great tour, thanks a lot Hina-chan!"

Hinata can't help but blush, "N-No problem Naruto-kun."

"So, Ino was the one who started that rumor, huh?"

Her eyes widened. How did he know? She thought nervously.

Naruto started leaning in, "I'm glad she did…"

Neji was seething from anger.

Sakura frowned and talked to the walkie talkie, "Tenten, keep the beast at bay! I repeat keep the beast at bay!"

"Yeah, he's ruining the NaruHina moment here!" Ino butted in.

"I'm trying sheesh! But he's not focusing on me…Damn it, fine I'll use that move." Tenten whispered.

Before Neji can massacre Naruto, Tenten raped him.

To put it bluntly, Sakura and Ino were scarred for life on that same day.

"…because I wouldn't have to try to capture your heart when it's already mine."

That last line was a failure D: