Rachel and Sad Ed forever. This is set in the second book, after they snogged at that party, but in this story Rachel actually realises she likes him. :)
Saturday 1 (April Fool's Day)
Oh God. So this is what happened. Sad Ed and I were hovering around being depressed (him) and vintage (me) in goth corner, watching Fat Kylie pretending to be Beyonce by gyrating her giant behind, when I said it was very likely no one would ever snog me again. So, for some reason I have not yet fathomed, Sad Ed said he would snog me. And for some reason, partly because Tuesday says he has excellent tongue technique and partly because I was desperate, I agreed. And so we snogged. It wasn't as horrible as I would have imagined, and he certainly does have excellent tongue technique, but just at the point where things were starting to get a bit heated Scarlet came over and demanded to know how long we had been dating, why we hadn't told her and how far we'd gone. Sad Ed told her we'd been dating six months, we hadn't told her because she would have felt like a bit of a 'gooseberry' and that we were planning on doing 'It' that evening. Scarlet was outraged and stormed off into a corner, muttering something utterly cruel about betrayals. Sad Ed turned back to me and looked very much like he was planning on showing me some more of that tongue technique when I slapped him. He looked stricken for a moment, and then turned away. I don't know why I did it. All right, I do, it was because it looked totally like a scene from a soap and I felt like being interesting. I do feel a bit guilty.
Oh God. Have just thought about that strange niceness felt when kissing Jack, back when I, ahem, thought I liked him (was very immature and inexperienced back then, obviously) and the feeling may have ever so slightly tingled in my stomach while playing tonsil tennis with Sad Ed. No. Please tell me he is not THE ONE.
Sorted. Sad Ed is THE ONE.
He came over to apologise, and I let him grovel for several minutes, just sort of revelling in his pain. Then I came to my senses, dragged him to his feet, and said 'I'm flattered if you like me but it would ruin our friendship and I want to stay the way we are.'
Well, that's what I intended to say.
Instead, I mumbled something intelligent along the lines of 'You…mumblemumble…snog…mumblemumble…THE ONE…mumblemumble…Oh. Well. Mmm.'
He started snogging me again halfway through, and I must admit it was nice. Very nice. Then he pulled away a bit and said, 'You are so stupidly blind, Rachel', before dragging me down again.
The words Sad Ed and THE ONE weren't ever ones I had planned to use in the same sentence, but I have been saying them an awful lot this evening. Sad Ed is coming over in 10 minutes, so we can officially tell Scarlet. Can. Not. Wait. For more snogging.
The End :)