A/N: Another unfinished story that was just sitting around in my flash drive. Hope you like it. It's fluffy, again. :D
Disclaimer: I own nothing… sadly.
Not So Insecure Anymore
I sigh contently as I let myself sink lower into the soft sheets of my bed, practically glowing with the aftermath of the love making I just took part in. I can't keep the giddy smile off my face, because it had all been so amazing, everything had felt so right as Sirius had kissed me, and touched me, as he had filled me and then come inside me, filling me with his moist, hot heat, his essence. I can still feel it deep inside of me, dripping out of me in a slow rate due to the fact that both of us have been too lazy to cast a cleaning charm. I like the feel of it though, and the knowledge that a part of him is still inside of me.
I find myself laughing, softly at first, trying in vain not to wake up my lover, because Gods, Sirius Black is my lover now, my love, and it feels so wonderful, and yet so surreal. Soon though, I'm laughing out right, giggling rather insanely, and Sirius opens his beautiful, grey eyes, and looks at me, his arms tightening around me.
"What's so funny," he asks, softly kissing my neck. I shiver as I feel his breath against my still damp skin, and I know that Sirius is grinning. He knows just what he does to me, and he loves that he can do it to me, that he's the only one that has ever done it to me, and will be the only one to ever do it to me. He is my one, my only, and as corny, as girly as it sounds, it makes me blissfully happy.
"It's just…" I whisper, turning slowly so that my eyes can meet his. He smiles at me as I turn to face him fully, and I sigh in contentment once more.
"It's just what, love?" Sirius whispers back. It's as if we are both too afraid to speak above a whisper, that if we do, we'd be breaking the spell that seems to have settled over us.
"I never imagined that I'd be here, laying next to you, naked much the less. I never thought that you could ever love me. I still don't really see how you can." I say, all the while snuggling closer to him. Despite my insecurities, and the fact that I think he's too good for me, I can't help but hold him tighter, more possessively, hating the idea of every letting him go.
Sirius grins at me, happily letting me fondle him, and my breath catches, because that smile… I know it's just for me. It's soft and warm and just a bit mischievous, and it manages to tell me that he loves me, at the same time that it tells me that I'm being foolish.
"How could I not love you Remus? Merlin, do you even know what you do to me? Should I tell you? Should I show you? Is it even possible for me to show you how much I care about you, how much you bloody mean to me?"
"I'm not sure," I murmur, words muffled due to my lips pressed against his chest. "You can try though," I say, because I'd say anything to have him kiss me and touch me and say such beautiful things to me.
Sirius smiles at me again, a bit more lovingly this time, and I vaguely find myself wondering if that is even possible, if it is possible for him to look at me with more feeling then he already is.
"I love you so much Moony," he tells me, kissing me softly on my already swollen lips. I moan, because even that small contact sends sparks of intense pleasure through me, and I can feel his lips quirk upwards as he moves to deepen the kiss.
It feels so natural for us to be together this way. For him to kiss me as if I mean something, and for me to respond to him as if I'd die if I didn't.
"Tell me that you love me," Sirius demands of me, his long, dark hair forming a curtain around our faces, blocking my view of anything but him. "I want to hear you say it," he says, and looking at him, I know that he needs the words, that at times, he can be as insecure as I am. His hold on me becomes rather desperate, his eyes fill with an odd combination of vulnerability and fear, odd because Sirius is afraid of nothing, and because vulnerability is something he never allows himself to feel.
"Of course I love you, you silly poof" I tell him, framing his beautifully sculptured face between my hands. It seems almost a crime, to touch such beauty, such goodness, with something as hideous and dark as I sometimes think I am.
Sirius, my lover, my boyfriend, my mate, seems to read my thoughts, covering my hands with his own, long fingers over lapping my own, and he smiles, so beautifully that I find myself breathless. "I like it when you touch me, Moony. I like how it makes me feel, all warm and tingling and ready for more." He sighs, nuzzling his face into the palm of one of my hands, before placing his own long fingered hands over mine and raising his lips up for another kiss.
I groan softly as our lips touch, moist and slightly clumsy yet still so perfect. Sirius pulls away after a moment and I groan again, in aggravation this time.
Sirius smiles, big and happy and outrageously bright, before resting his forehead against mine as he looks directly into my eyes. "I want you forever Moony. There will never be a day I don't. Now that I have you, I won't let you go. You're mine."
I smile happily as I kiss his cheek. "And you're mine."
"Damn right I am."
After that there isn't much talking because Sirius is in me again, moving against me slowly, and our pace is gentle and patient. Right now it's not about lust. It's about love, and as we both come, screaming out each other's names, what we have is obvious.
And I know it'll last forever.
A/N: Sorry guys, really not in much of a mood to write a juicy sex scene, especially since I have to take my TA2 exam in about twenty minutes. So, maybe next time :D
Review and let me know what you think.