I AM NOT DEAD.
I'm actually.. Pretty proud of this chapter. I like it. And it's also my longest. Maybe eventually I'll be able to hit my 2,000 word goal... I was really close this time. I'm sorry this chapter took so long. I promise I didn't abandon this story. See? Because I love you all too much.
Especially when I saw I had over 50 reviews. You guys have no idea how happy that made me. 50 reviews. ;_;
Okay, here we go!
English Literature Chapter 7: Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid
Thunk, thunk, thunk
England threw on a robe and marched groggily to his front door. Who could be knocking at this hour? He shuffled through his living room and opened the door, squinting at the morning sunlight.
"Ah, hello hello! Good morning Ar- sir! Can I interest you in a free carpet cleaning today?" A man stood at the door dressed in a business suit, with a carpet cleaner in tow. England furrowed his brow. Where had he heard that accent before? Oh well. It really didn't matter, he supposed.
"No thank you." England said simply, pushing the door to shut it.
"Uh, wait!" The salesman said, putting his foot in the way of the door. England gaped. Why, the nerve..!
Now fully awake, England could clearly make out the details of the man. He had dark brown hair and oddly familiar blue eyes. England knew he couldn't have known the man, but he was eerily familiar... And what was that sticking out from under his hair? A piece of blonde h-
"Hey Iggy, who's at the door?" England spun around to find a topless Alfred face-to-face with him.
Before England could even say anything, the salesman behind them said quickly "Thank you gentlemen very much! I must be going now~" He looked like he had just one the jackpot. Before he could turn away, England whipped back around. Something was definitely not right.
"Hey, wait you!" He yelled as he reached out to grab the man. His hands clasped around the odd salesman's hair, and he tugged.
And ended up with a brown wig.
England looked back up and growled, narrowing his eyes. He grabbed the man by his jacket and pulled him inside the house, shoving him against the wall.
"Maybe the next time you buy a wig," he hissed "you'll make sure it closer matches your natural hair color, Francis."
America gaped, almost too shocked for speech. Almost. "Whoa! That was you, man?"
Francis smiled weakly. "Ah, L'Amérique, L'Angleterre. I can explain, reall-"
"Explain what, you bloody pervert? That you were trying to spy on me?" England interrupted, tightening his grip on Francis' fake business suit. France swallowed.
"No! Well, yes, but it's more complicated. If you let me go I can-"
England released his death grip on the French man. "You won't tell anyone about this. Right? I'd like to keep this a secret a bit longer." His eyes flashed dangerously.
France shook his head quickly. Just listen to me!" He said, a bit frustrated. Before either England or America could say anything, he continued. "I was sent here to find out what was going on with you two for sure by the other nations. Well, some of them. Hungary even gave me a camera to take pictures with." France explained, pulling out the digital camera.
"What?" England exclaimed, grabbing the camera from France's hands. Sure enough, there was a picture of him turned the opposite way of the camera, facing America who didn't have a shirt on. "When did you take this?"
"A minute ago, before you caught me."
England scowled. Fiddling with the camera, he finally got frustrated. "Here, delete this Alfred!" He said, tossing the camera to the American, who swiftly caught it.
"I still don't believe you. You probably have that camera for your own perverted needs. Besides, why would the other countries give two hoots about my relationships?"
France shifted uncomfortably. "Well, we don't. Just your and Alfred's relationship. For several countries, there's quite a bit of money involved.."
"People are making bets on me and Alfred's relationships? Bets?" England looked livid. France winced.
"Er... Yes, I suppose you could but it that way. You two are a bit of an icon. If there was a 'Most Likely to Get Married' title for the nations, you guys would definitely own it. And apparently someone saw you two when you were on your date the other night, and spread some rumors around... And so obviously they all came to me to find out the truth. I told them I didn't know, but they insisted I go investigate."
England gave France a very dirty look. "I've never heard any of you say a word about it when I'm with you." France rolled his eyes.
"Of course not! Would you gossip about someone when they're right in front of you? We're not idiots." France gave a very pointed look at America, who was too busy looking through the camera's contents to notice.
England looked slightly distraught for a moment, before suddenly laughing. "I still don't believe you. The whole story's preposterous. You honestly expect me to believe that?"
France sighed and shook his head. "I guess you'll find out for yourself tomorrow at the meeting. England raised his eyebrows.
"Guess we will."
"Hey, when was this picture taken?" America inquired, staring at the camera. He showed it to France and England.
It ended up shattered against the wall, and then was promptly stomped on.
And France was right about the rest of the nations. Immediately when they walked in the conference room the atmosphere tensed up. Everyone's eyes turned toward America and England, and it almost made England wish maybe he would've heeded France's warning not to walk in together. The staring only got worse when England and America sat down next to each other, which was odd because they usually did, and normally nobody noticed.. It was simply habit. England could feels his cheeks reddening, but kept his mind on the fact that this was a meeting, not a social gathering.
He snuck a glance at America who was as oblivious as ever. He had been abnormally quiet since last night though, after France left. It was almost like he was in deep thought about something, but if England asked him what he would laugh and dismiss it. It was almost making England mad.
Finally, finally, Germany stood up the call the meeting to order and quiet the whispers that were slowly taking over the room. The meeting started off with all of the different nations standing up to give their respective speeches. For the most part this went pretty normally, but the tense atmosphere still hung in the air. Almost all of the countries were staring at him and America, and the ones that weren't refused to even look that way. It was making England very uncomfortable.
When it was finally his turn to speak, England stood and gave his speech somewhat hesitantly. It seemed to him that everyone but America (still absorbed in his thoughts) and Germany (stoic as ever) were on the edge of their seats, clinging onto every word he was saying.
As England returned to his seat after his speech, (which he had a hard time focusing on considering the fact that everyone was staring at him – even Italy woke up from his nap and was listening.) America stood up to go give his. England was slightly surprised – he didn't think America was paying enough attention to know it was his turn.
But while giving his speech, America acted like his true self. He barely stayed on topic as always, even arguing with some of the other countries. England let out a relieved sigh. Hopefully he would be more like his obnoxious as always self after this. As much as England liked peace and quiet, without a chaotic America in his life it could get to be pretty boring. Everything was back to normal.
"... And that is why hamburgers are obviously better than pasta." The American announced loudly, although it was obviously directed at a rather put-out looking Italy. England sighed and took a sip of his tea.
"And also, I slept with England last night."
And then the atmosphere exploded. England nearly choked to death on his tea, and the whispers that had went around the room earlier were thrown out like they were nothing. People were laughing and screaming, and Poland even stood up and said:
"Oh, I so like, totally called it! Like, pay up Liet babe."
And then Arthur had had enough. He needed to talk to America. Right now. He rushed to the podium where America was standing.
"Outside. Now." He said, grabbing America's tie and trying to drag him out. But America wasn't about to leave without a fight.
America frowned but complied, allowing himself to be drug out of the conference room by a very angry England. In all of the commotion they were able to slip out fairly easily without much attention. Once they were outside, England spun around to face America.
"What. Are. You. Thinking!" he asked him through clenched teeth. America swallowed.
"They were all going to find out anyways, I figured I'd just tell everyone at once, I don't know what the big-"
"Deal is? What the big deal is? The big deal is that you just announced to everyone in that room that we had sex last night!"
America bit his lip. "Well, no. I said we slept together. I never said anything about having sex..."
England glowered. "You know as well as I do that when you say that someone is sleeping together they're having sex."
"Not everyone has sex every night when they're sleeping with someone! Unless they're France, but.."
England pinched the bridge of his nose. "What are we going to do..."
America tilted his head. "What do you mean? It's not like I lied about anything."
"I know you didn't lie about anything," England said, flushing a bit. "But we can't walk back in there." He opened the conference door and peeked in the room. The commotion was no better, if not worse. Germany was up trying to get everyone to calm down, but to no avail. England sighed.
"It doesn't look like anybody's really noticed we've left yet..."
"Well, that's ironic considering the whole thing's because of me."
England glared at the American. "I know."
America frowned. "Iggy... Please don't be mad! Please!" He put on his best puppy dog look he could manage. England looked away.
"You're not seven anymore. That doesn't work."
America huffed. "Fine. But I'm telling you, they would have found out anyways..."
England looked at America again. "I know they would have found out, but there are better ways than announcing it at a podium when you're supposed to be giving a speech."
America grinned. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He scratched the back of his neck and kicked at the ground bashfully. "So let's ditch."
England gave him a bewildered look. "What?"
"Ditch." America repeated. "Cut. Play hooky. Leave the meeting and not come back." He elaborated. "Or would you rather go back in there?" He motioned toward the door. England made a face.
"No. I guess we don't have much other choice. Where shall we go?"
America grinned. "Let's go to the movies! We'll see whatever's playing. Maybe we'll even sneak in a second one if there's still time left." He winked. England rolled his eyes.
"... Fine. You're paying for the popcorn."
America's smiled widened as they walked out of the building together, leaving the rest of the nations behind to wonder where they had gone.
I wonder what was on that camera?
And were they really just sleeping? ;)
France and his costumes remind me of Jesse and James from Pokemon. And the fact that everyone is so easily fooled by the outfits.
ANYHOW, I'M NOT DEAD. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? I can't. I can't believe I went over a month without this chapter. I just got a bad case of writer's block for this story... But I'm back and in action!
I originally had a completely different idea with for this chapter, but I hated it and ended up scrapping it and... I couldn't think of anything after that until I thought of this.
Thanks for reading!