This is my first fanfiction posted ever! Woo! I do hope this will at least get some chuckles from you reading out there and I will try to update by next Friday. If not then next Saturday, I'm very busy with exams! I'm sorry if any of the characters seem a little OOC, this is mainly just for humor so don't expect much of a plot. Enjoy.
"I know you normally don't like this sort of thing, but IT"S REALLY AMAZING! You HAVE to watch it an-"
"No," Susannah said, swerving back to the computer monitor. Claire pouted her lips then grabbed the chair, dragging Susannah into the den. Susannah turned and glared at Claire. "Let go! I said no!" Susannah jumped out of the chair and made a break for the stairs, but Claire had predicted this move and wrapped her arms around Susannah's waist, tackling her to the ground.
"Come on! We're twins, we have the same DNA! If I like it you're BOUND to like it." Claire whined, sitting on top of Susannah. Susannah squirmed and wiggled, trying to break free, but with no success. She sighed in defeat.
"Fine… if you stop pestering me I'll watch Hellsing." Claire pumped her fist into the air. "But! Only one episode. If I don't like it I get to stop and you won't bring it up again," Susannah said, turning her head to look at Claire. Claire grabbed Susannah's hand and nearly pulled it out of its socket from shaking it so hard. She practically vibrated with enthusiasm.
"Deal! You're going to LOVE this series. No way you will stop with just one!" Claire jumped off Susannah and sprinted towards the movie box, skidding and falling to the floor. Susannah would have laughed if she wasn't still aching from being tackled onto the hard ground. Susannah tuned out Claire's excited chattering as she skimmed through DVD titles. Claire released a high-pitch squeal of delight that caused Susannah to flinch. How could she be a carbon copy of THIS idiot she wondered. The magic of genetics still bewildered her. Except for conflicting personalities, Claire and Susannah looked exactly the same. Same pale brown hair and eyes, same slightly tanned skin, both five foot nine. Claire raced to the DVD player, popping in the disc. Susannah sat onto the couch with a thud. Claire practically leapt beside her, gripping the remote control tightly. Susannah rubbed the bridge of her nose, sighing loudly. Claire playfully punched Susannah in the arm. "Don't complain! It's an amazing show!"
The Hellsing main menu popped up and Claire set up the audio before picking the first episode. The screen then started to swirl red and black. Claire frowned.
"What's up with the TV?" Susannah asked, stifling a yawn and suppressing some relief. Claire ran up to the TV, sliding onto her knees.
"Stupid TV," Claire said, banging onto its side. However the swirling only got faster. Claire raised her hand to bang against the glass front, but instead of hitting a solid surface her fist went into the television. She let out a scream as the rest of her body was sucked into the vortex on the television. Susannah jumped up and raced over to Claire, reaching out and barely missing her feet. Susannah fell flat on her face. She looked up panicked.
"Claire!" She gazed into the swirling whirlpool, trying to find any sign of Claire. "Claire! Can you hear me?" she yelled into the television. Then she felt a pull, steadily getting stronger as she resisted against it. Susannah let out a scream identical to her sister's as she too fell into the vortex.
~Meanwhile in the Hellsingverse~
Integra sat back into her chair, silently smoking one of her cigars as Alucard phased through a wall. He bowed low, a satisfied smirk on his face.
"What do you have to report Alucard?" Integra said.
"The target was silenced, my Mater," Alucard said, his eyes flashing behind his sunglasses. Integra nodded.
"Good, my servant. You are dismissed." Alucard bowed again, and just began to phase through the wall again when a distant scream caught his attention. It sounded like it was coming from one of the upper levels. He looked up just as a girl fell through a portal on the ceiling. She landed directly on top of him, sending both of them crashing onto the ground. He was stunned for less than a second, utterly baffled at how this girl got into the mansion without any of the security staff, or more importantly HIMSELF from noticing. Suddenly interested he grinned. The girl lifted her head up and looked over at his face, still slightly dazed.
"Alucard?" She asked, rubbing her eyes in disbelief. His grin got wider.
"So my name precedes me," he said, his grin getting more sinister and his teeth flashing in the moonlight. Integra, though caught off guard by the sudden intruder, sat back calmly, waiting for the girl to scream in terror. A high-pitch squeal filled the room as the girl threw her arms around Alucard's neck and snuggled up close to his chest. Integra's cigar fell out of her mouth as she gaped with shock. Even Alucard was taken back by this girl's reaction; he was even too shocked to get out of her grip. The girl snuggled up more closely to Alucard in the meantime.
"You're real! You're really real! It's a dream come true!" She said. Alucard snapped out of his daze and phased out of her grip. He towered over her, grinning wider than before.
"More like a nightmare," he said. The girl looked up eagerly as Alucard pulled out the Jackal and placed it right between her eyes. "Good night," Alucard began to pull the trigger, but another girl had fallen through another portal in the ceiling and landed on top of his head. Again he was sent crashing into the ground. He recovered instantly, wearing a scowl instead of his usual smirk. As he stood up he grabbed the second girl by the front of her shirt, lifting her up. He moved the Jackal to the center of the second girl's forehead, but didn't pull the trigger. He looked at her face, then at the first girl's face. He grinned and let out a laugh. "Master, it seems we have a pair of doppelgangers," he said, grabbing the first girl by the front of her shirt too. The second girl, recovering from the fall from the ceiling, frowned.
"We're identical twins you ass, now let me go!" She struggled, without any success. Alucard simply laughed. Integra had composed herself at this point and walked up to the two identical girls. Her face was burning red and she was clenching her fists. She was on the brink of lashing out at the two girls, but she restrained herself.
"I'm only going to give you one chance to explain who you are and why you dare trespass on Hellsing property before I leave you to my servant's form of interrogation!" Alucard sneered, his canines flashing. The second girl looked furiously at the other girl.
"Hellsing! What the hell did you do Claire!" the girl yelled.
Claire looked over at her and said, "Nothing! I don't know how we ended up in Hellsing." Claire looked over at Integra. "Very, very sorry Sir Integra. I'm Claire Gale, and this is my sister Susan Ga-"
"Susannah," Susannah butted in. Claire flashed a glare at her before turning her attention back to Integra, who was quickly losing her patience.
"To tell the truth, I don't have a clue how we ended up in the Hellsing manor, although I'm very glad we did." Claire looked up at Alucard and grinned, batting her eyelashes. Susannah reached over and smacked her in the back of the head.
"Stop that! We're in enough trouble as it is, let alone if you go flirting around." Alucard chuckled.
"Getting jealous Susan." Susannah glared up at Alucard.
"Don't call me that," she growled. Alucard laughed again.
"Stop playing around Alucard, we have more important business to take care of," Integra sighed, lighting a new cigar. Alucard stopped laughing, although his grin was still beaming, and put down Claire and Susannah. He smirked as Susannah slapped her arm away while Claire lingered until Susannah pulled her away. Integra took her seat behind her desk, motioning to the two chairs in front of it. Claire and Susannah took a seat, Alucard stood back in the shadows enjoying the girls' reactions. "Now, tell me how you came to know confidential information about Hellsing and how you transported here."
Susannah and Claire began to talk in cycles, explaining how in their universe Hellsing is a show and telling her the story of how they got sucked into the portal in the television. Alucard was cackling in the background during most of the story, causing Susannah to glare at him several times to make him shut up. This, however, only succeeded in making him laugh more. When they finally ended telling their story Integra rubbed her forehead wearily.
"So you two are from another universe and transported here through your television, correct?" Claire and Susannah nodded in unison. Integra sighed loudly, thinking about all the trouble this will bring from the members of the Round Table, and probably the queen herself. "Alright, since the both of you know too much confidential information about the Hellsing Organization you two will be housed here at the manor until further notice." Claire nearly jumped out of the chair, screaming in delight.
"Thank you so much Sir Integra!" Susannah grumbled loudly and sank deep into the chair. Integra twitched in annoyance and took a long puff from her cigar to calm herself down.
"Alucard, show the Gales to some of the temporary guest rooms, and then go inform Walter to come see me immediately," Integra said. Alucard bowed.
"My pleasure, my Master." Then he started for the door. Claire ran up and clung onto his arm, which caused him to try in vain to free from her grip. Susannah slunk up behind them, murmuring how a pain in the ass this was going to be. As the door shut Integra leaned back into her seat. She rubbed the bridge of her nose, hoping to god that this unexpected disturbance wasn't going to cause too much trouble.
First Chapter is finished! Hopefully you good people out there liked it! Leave reviews if you like, I'll greatly appreciate them and they will most likely make me want to write the next chapter faster. But it's not a obligation. Hoped this didn't waste too much time! Be back soon!