A/N: Picspiration: weheartit dot com slash entry slash 558726 (NSFW)
This is a little different than perhaps what the TwiGirls had in mind when they issued the call for submissions, but I hope you feel that it fits and qualifies just the same.
Thank you to TwilightMundi, for doing a last-minute beta job once I got my act together. Thank you to manyafandom, SweetDulci, and sweetandsalty for loaning me their beautiful eyes and brains as pre-readers. I am endlessly in your debt.
All copyright and trademarked items mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. The remaining content is all mine. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization.
Jasper and I had our share of ups and downs in life, in love, and int marriage together. Nothing was perfect or easy, but that was part of what made it worth it – we had to fight for each other, and for what we really wanted from life. Our love, trust, and commitment to each other ran deep.
Our time together replayed through my mind as I waited on the couch in my lingerie. I was lounging back in a reclined pose. My body had been waxed and massaged the day before, in what I hoped was the start to a perfect weekend.
Jasper was on his way home from a business meeting in Los Angeles, having flown back that afternoon. I expected to hear his truck any minute, and thought about how our night would go as I rubbed my smooth, bare calves together. My red toenails twinkled at me and I laughed to myself at how Jasper always called it "throw me down and fuck me red."
Finally, I heard the garage door open, then the rumble of his truck. Though he played the role of businessman during the week, my Jasper was a little rough around the edges. He had the smallest hint of his hometown accent when he was drunk, angry, or really, really horny. It was stronger when he picked up his guitar and played old country songs, but entirely gone when he sang just to me, in the quiet dark of our bedroom.
Fancy cars and suits weren't his thing; he liked beer from a bottle and his giant truck. Though he indulged me in my cravings for sushi, he was most comfortable manning the barbecue on our spacious backyard, with our friends surrounding us. He had ink on his body in places only I would ever see or know about, symbols and words that were meaningful to us. To me. For me.
He was everything to me, and I knew he felt the same.
The sound of the garage door brought me from my musings, and I smiled, pushing my chest up and out in anticipation of him turning the corner and seeing me.
His bags hit the floor and he exhaled loudly. I still couldn't see him yet, and the anticipation was building. When I'd reached my limit and was about to call out to him, he rounded the corner. I sighed, and felt complete again. He was back, whole, and all mine.
I couldn't wait to get him naked.
Leaning against the living room entryway, he scanned my body, head to toe, several times before letting out a deep, rumbling hum of approval.
"I sure hope I didn't keep you waiting here long," he said as he walked to me.
"I'd wait forever," I whispered. "I missed you."
Long, rough fingers made their way under the cup of my lingerie, teasing my nipple to a peak.
"I missed you, too, honey. So much."
As he loosened his tie, I took a minute to drink him in. He still had his button-down, fancy collared shirt and tie on, but had changed from his slacks into his dark jeans that he knew I loved. Aside from being naked, they were hands down the sexiest thing he owned. He was half Work Jasper, half My Jasper, and I liked the mix. The smell of his spicy cologne lingered when he got closer to me, and I inhaled him in. I wanted to bathe in Jasper, spend weeks loving him and reconnecting now that he was home. Business trips were an unfortunate reality for him, but the separations always did us good, in the long run.
His finger moved from my breast to my collarbone, swirling against my skin. "Any reason I shouldn't throw you over my shoulder and take you to the bedroom for a good, hard, 'Welcome Home' fuck?"
My plans were almost foiled at his words; he knew my every weakness, but I had a plan, damn it, and I was going to stick to it.
"Yeah," I said against his neck. "I have plans for you, baby."
Pulling back from my body slightly, he looked at me and raised an eyebrow. "Plans for me?"
Nodding, I smiled.
"I've wanted to do something with you for awhile now."
At that, he laughed, and I knew what he was thinking – there wasn't much Jasper and I hadn't done together.
"Something new?" he asked, his voice raising up just slightly with excitement at the prospect.
"Yeah." The word was long and lazy coming from my lips, and I looked down his body again. He clearly liked this idea.
Reaching my hand out, I teased up the inside of his thigh, stopping just before I reached where he wanted me. "Tonight, Mister Whitlock, you're mine."
I sat up, spreading my legs just a bit to accommodate his legs between them. As I stood, my hands on either side of his body, I let them wander beneath his shirt.
"You are to do what I say, when I say it, with no arguments. Is that clear?"
When I stood, we were of equal height, thanks to my insanely high red patent heels.
"Yes," he breathed.
"Yes, what?" I asked, pinching both of his nipples lightly.
"Yes ma'am?" he asked.
My fingers released their grip and smoothed the skin of his broad, muscled chest. Pushing just slightly, I led him, walking backward, to our bedroom. I had a few toys laid out, things I'd purchased in his absence and planned to use.
"Jasper, I know you're a big boy and all," my hand trailed down the front of his pants to his hard cock, "but if you need a little break, or want to stop, you need to say 'red.' That's not too hard, is it?" I gave a little squeeze for effect.
"No," he eked out.
"Tsk tsk. What did we just cover? Turn around. Grab the top of the door frame."
He did as instructed, while whispering "No, Ma'am." I could hear the smile in his voice, though, and I knew he was loving every fucking second of this.
His arms reached up, and his body was long and lean before me. I could see the muscles in his arms flexing as he gripped the molding of the frame, pressing against the fabric of his shirt.
"I'm going to be easy on you this time, because we just started, Jasper," I said, pulling my hand back. I landed one semi-hard stroke against his right cheek, then repositioned myself. "But if you continue to misbehave, I'll have no recourse but to put you over my knee." Landing another smack, I heard him groan and watched his body bow away from me slightly, the sting underneath the fabric probably much less than that in my own hand, I reasoned. I laughed a little (on the inside) about how the spankings probably hurt me more than him, which was one fantasy knocked out by the reality of my experience so far.
Reaching around to the front of his shirt, I undid the buttons carefully. Requesting he lower his arms, I teased him as I removed the fabric, pressing against his back a little more than necessary once it was gone. My fingertips found his nipples again, as I asked him to repeat the word that would cease my actions, and he did so quietly, remembering to follow it with the proper title that time.
Instructing him to stay where he was, I moved around him and grabbed the blindfold from the dresser.
I had bought the blindfold and other toys while he was gone on this latest business trip. I hated visiting the toy store without him, but I'd been thinking about this particular night for a long, long time. The truth was, it had been a desire of mine since before we'd even met. Never had any of the men I'd dated seemed like the type that would be willing to let me explore this side of myself, and potentially that side of them.
Having no clue how to bring the topic up, I simply decided to go for the direct method. Jasper was confident enough in us, and our connection, that I knew he'd tell me if it was something he wasn't interested in, and I also knew he was secure enough with himself that he would probably submit beautifully and completely to me.
There was strength and trust wound together in submission, I thought, and of all of my past partners, Jasper was the only one I would trust enough to do this with. Knowing that he'd love me if I failed, love me if I succeeded, and maybe he'd like it enough to want to do it again, turned me on beyond my wildest expectations.
I could imagine him tied to the posts of our huge bed, naked and hard, begging me to fuck him. Begging for the privilege of fucking me. The thought made me shiver, and I realized I was getting ahead of myself. I just wanted to get through some easy things that night, to test the waters so to speak. Who knew, maybe I wouldn't even like the reality of it.
Who was I kidding?
Slipping the blindfold over Jasper's thick curls, the one part of himself he only slightly altered for business meetings – slicking it back instead of cutting it, as I'm sure some of his associates would have preferred – I realized that just this once, I'd appreciate the sticky mess of product in his hair; I hoped it would help keep the blindfold in place.
"If this slips at all and you're able to see, I expect you to tell me immediately."
He nodded, and I accepted that as his answer. It was an awful lot for him to take in at once, I imagined. I'd had weeks, months, years, to think and fantasize about how this would play out... I'd given him maybe a few minutes to adjust his thought processes.
When thinking about what I wanted to do, I almost hesitated with blindfolding him. Jasper didn't just have fucking amazingly beautiful, ocean blue eyes, but it was also one of the ways I felt connected to him. We could look at each other across the room and almost sense what the other was feeling. He was able to convey a hell of a lot of emotion to me through his eyes, but I wanted to have just a little fun, and since I wasn't really diving into anything too deep, I thought the sensory deprivation would be interesting.
Taking his hand in mine, I instructed him to walk forward, then turn, and led him to our bed.
Though it had taken me awhile to share this fantasy with him, it was only because of the trust and love we shared in this space that I ever knew I could. Some of our best (and worst) nights had been spent there, and it was safe and comfortable for both of us.
Once he was situated, I stepped back and took him in again, spread out on the bed, blindfolded, fucking beautiful. Smiling, I turned and grabbed the soft fur flogger I'd purchased. I twirled the ends over his chest, and he pulled in, laughing a bit.
"Tickles?" I asked.
Hearing him call me that, hearing that little bit of twang infused with it that time, made my body throb with anticipation.
"Turn over, please."
He readily and willingly complied, turning over faster than I'd have imagined, and I guessed I wasn't the only eager one.
As I'd read, and learned from the store I'd purchased from, I flopped the fur against his skin. I had tested it on myself, so I could imagine how it felt to him, the fluff gently thunking on his body, soft stroking from each of the tendrils. Running the little strips up his back, I played with the sensation, toying with him, just dragging it around his body.
"Jasper?" I asked, to make sure he wasn't asleep. He'd been so still, I couldn't be sure.
Every worry I normally would have been able to detect in his voice appeared gone. He almost sounded drunk, he was so relaxed.
Getting up from the bed, I grabbed the suede flogger. I ran my hand through the long pieces of velvety-feeling material as I walked back to Jasper.
"I'm going to use something a little harder next, baby, is that okay?"
One thing I knew from the get-go was that I wanted Jasper to agree to everything I did. We didn't have rules or lists or any discussion before, so I knew this wasn't the traditional way people went about experimenting, but it felt right for us.
The drawled half-question made me smile.
"Just remember, you can tell me to stop if it's too much."
My hands were stroking down his back, skin on skin, and I was so happy in that moment, so loved and accepted. Stepping back, I repeated the same light dance of the flogger on his back. Then, I picked it up and let it fall onto his ass. A few times, I just let the weight of it carry onto his jeans, letting him adjust to the idea, and acclimate to the sensation.
Once I was feeling a little more confident with myself, I pulled the flogger back and made sure the suede tips landed harder. I knew the denim would break the fall and ease the sensation, but I still worried about hurting him.
Watching his upper body flex and tense, then release when he'd mentally processed how each strike felt was intense. My wrist began to flick back and forth in a rhythmic motion, landing thudding smacks on each side of his butt. Soon, he was swaying and moving, surprising me. Instead of moving away from each expected blow, he was moving into it. Anticipating it, and clearly wanting it.
"You naughty boy, I see you moving," I said, smiling. "Turn over."
Dropping the flogger, I crawled back onto the bed.
"Put your hands above your head, and don't move them."
My mouth landed on his left pec, just below where one of his pieces of ink was. He'd gotten our initials woven together, above his heart. I'd never forget the night he showed me the sketch of the prospective tattoo, explaining that he could add our children's initials below, and weave them into the design. It was the first time we talked seriously about having a family.
Red lipstick stained his skin where my lips had been, and I trailed one more kiss lower, almost to his hipbone, leaving a second spot. Undoing the button of his jeans, I pulled them and the zipper slid, parting the material away from his body. His navy boxer briefs covered my almost favorite part of him, and I slid my hand beneath the elastic.
"My little pet, I'd say you're enjoying this just as much as I am," I whispered in his ear.
My hand wrapped around his hard length, swiping the dripping precum from the tip and using it as lube as I wound lower.
"Maybe you're enjoying it a little more, in fact," I teased. "Why don't you find out."
Without the benefit of sight, his hand moved into my hair first, the closest part of my body to his. Fingertips wove through the hanging strands, then to my face, against my lips. I smiled again, and his fingers moved with my crinkling mouth, dipping inside just briefly. As they moved lower, wet, they trailed the cold with them, the air hitting each spot he'd wet and making me get goosebumps. When he reached my breast, he stopped for a moment and cupped the material holding my skin. I imagined what it felt like to him, the intricate lace overlay against his hand.
When he began to move again, I sat back on my haunches and spread my legs in anticipation. I hadn't stopped moving my hand on his cock, and when he finally reached the apex of my thighs, he twitched and hardened further. His fingers sank into me, wasting no time, and pulled back out slowly. Finding my clit with his thumb, he pressed and circled, easing my body down a path of pleasure.
"No more," I said quietly, almost with regret.
Jasper was really good with his hands, but that wasn't my focus just then. His smile pulled down into a pout, and I wasn't even sure he was consciously aware he'd changed his expression.
"Taste me. Lick your fingers," I explained. "You'll get a chance to pleasure me later... if you behave."
Always a showman, Jasper brought his hand to his mouth and licked each finger that had been inside of me clean, with precision. He made noises as he did it, and lifted his hips against my hand several times.
Withdrawing my hand from his body, I turned to find another of the toys I'd purchased, a pair of adjustable nipple clamps. When I heard Jasper moan softly, I turned back to him and saw his hands wrapped around his thick cock, and decided that just wasn't okay.
Grabbing the flogger, I landed one heavy swat on his denim-covered thigh, and then spoke.
"I thought I told you to keep your hands above your head? Now I'm going to have to use these."
Taking my time to make sure he heard the metal clanging against itself, I played with the cuffs I'd purchased. They were leather with metal rings that bound them together, but I sort of hoped he'd think they were the traditional handcuffs you see policemen using. Once I had them on, I was sure he knew they weren't, but it was interesting for me to play with the sensation of sound and the toy that was his imagination.
"I think it's time for these to come off, too," I said, pulling his jeans from his body. I left his boxers on for the time being, just because I didn't want the temptation to be too great for me yet.
Suddenly, I had an idea, and my plan shifted just a bit.
Tapping the nipple clamps on the dresser, I made more noise and took far longer than necessary to get ready, enjoying making him wait for the next move. When I'd had enough waiting, I turned and looked at him.
Straddling his body, I put each of the clamps on and tightened just beyond where I thought it was loose, so that it wasn't too overwhelming the first time. I had no idea if Jasper enjoyed the slight blur of the line between pleasure and pain, but in the past, he'd seemed to enjoy me biting him, so I made an educated guess, and went with a little pain.
When he twitched again beneath me, I swiveled my hips against him. Finally, it was finally the friction I needed. My body began to move, almost without my permission, against his. It was familiar, but so different. Normally, Jasper's hands and mouth would be all over me, but I'd specifically told him to be still, and bound his hands above his head.
Watching his reaction, I tugged on the chain holding the clamps on his nipples, and heard his low groan. My own matched his, as I began to feel my orgasm building.
"Jasper," I warned, my voice stern. "Don't..." I paused, grinding myself against him harder and taking a sharp intake of breath. "You..." I was nearly there, almost at the peak of my orgasm. "Dare..." I could feel it then, another few movements and I'd be flying into it. "Come," I managed to get out, then let out a strangled moan as I came above him.
When the sensation had stopped and my body felt like my own again, I realized I'd tugged fairly hard on the chain. Jasper didn't seem to be minding, though, still hard as nails beneath me.
"Mmm," I hummed, temporarily satisfied. "That was hot. Riding you like that, using your body for just my pleasure." Shivering again, I could see he agreed. "You're such a good boy, aren't you?"
"Yes Ma'am," he breathed, almost panting for his own air.
Using his nickname, I asked, "Are you still enjoying yourself, J?" Although I could see and feel that he was, I wanted him to be present and aware of just how much fun he really was having.
"Hell yes, Ma'am," he said with a laugh.
Cupping his face between my palms, I kissed his lips softly, then trailed my mouth over to the side of his neck.
"Think you're ready to fuck me?" I whispered.
"Yes please," he drawled, moving his lips frantically against the skin of my neck. When he finished speaking, he opened his mouth and scraped his teeth on my flesh, provoking a shaky moan from me.
Turning around, I lowered his boxers just enough, then moved myself over him. Using one hand to guide him, I sank down onto his body. Without his hands to guide my hips, I would be in almost complete control of the speed and depth at which we made love, or fucked, depending on how you wanted to look at it.
I rose up on my knees, then placed one of my hands behind me, on his chest, and gave a tug to the chain as I sank back down onto him. We repeated this pattern several times, until my hand went to my clit, the other on Jasper's thigh to steady myself and keep me from falling over. My fingers were fast and furious. I knew my body, and knew what would bring me to orgasm fastest, and that's what I went for. My need was frantic and frenzied, and I could feel Jasper holding back, trying his hardest to obey my command not to come.
As I felt my orgasm begin, I sank down, simply rocking back and forth and feeling him inside me. My entire body tensed and my muscles vibrated with the movement of the climax as it swept through me. This second time, I let out a loud yelp as the tip of his cock grazed my g-spot each time I rocked, seeming to extend the pleasure.
Nearly exhausted, I took a moment to rest after the intensity of my orgasm. Panting for breath, I thought about Jasper beneath me, still rock hard, eager, and ready. Lifting myself off of him, I turned and looked at his expression – it was pain and pleasure, twisted into one. Trust and torture. Love and lust.
Undoing the clip between the wrist cuffs, I didn't even take the time to remove them entirely.
"Fuck me," I said.
Jasper didn't ask a single question, or hesitate a single second, he simply rolled us both and began to pound into me. Still blindfolded, he found my legs and adjusted them so my thighs were against his, my legs up his chest. Each thrust seemed to go deeper and further inside me, until I felt like I'd never come down from the high. One of his hands made its way to my clit, the other pinching and pulling my nipple as I moaned and panted my way through a third orgasm.
When he began to beg, thrusting into me harshly still, I knew he'd had enough.
Between pants, and grunts, I managed to utter my permission for him to come, and it took only a few more thrusts before he did so. He was swearing, gripping my legs for dear life at that point, and pushing me so hard against the headboard I worried I'd have a huge lump on my head, which almost made me giggle. Almost.
"Jesus, fuck, christ, holy shit..."
He went on for at least a full minute, babbling incoherently as I felt him throbbing inside of me. I'd never seen his orgasm last so long, and I did laugh at the overwhelming feeling of pride and joy that we'd participated in something that felt so scary to me – had such potential to bring a rift between us – and we'd done it successfully. Very successfully.
Jasper lowered my shaking legs, giving each a kiss on the way, then settled himself on my body. His face was at my belly, and he placed tiny kisses all around the soft skin, each seeming to carry a different meaning.
"May I take my blindfold off, Ma'am?"
I could almost hear the wink in his voice when he asked, and I could certainly see the broad smile on his face. It hit me in that moment that I'd never be able to hear him call anyone Ma'am again without getting instantly wet and horny, remembering what we'd done.
"Yes, you may."
Removing the blindfold, he looked next at the wrist cuffs, then raised an eyebrow in silent question. I nodded, giving my silent permission back for him to remove them. He tossed the items to the ground on the side of the bed, and pulled himself up so that he was face-to-face with me.
"That was … certainly new."
Laughing, I wrapped my arms around him and pulled his body close to mine. We had so much to talk about, but the thrill of what we'd done was intoxicating. Kissing, we held each other for awhile.
After we'd showered slowly, bathed each other with soap and love, we made a quick snack together in the kitchen.
"Fireplace?" I asked, and he nodded.
Carrying the plate of fruit and crackers ahead of me and into the living room, I watched Jasper, then stopped in the linen closet to grab a soft blanket. Spreading it out, I smiled at him, then laid down. He followed, hands quickly touching and warming me. After a few long, slow kisses, he got up and built a fire for us to enjoy. When he laid back down, I fed him a grape.
My voice was low and quiet when I spoke. "So, what did you think about that?"
His answering grin immediately soothed my fears. I don't know what I was so nervous about, if he hadn't liked it, surely he'd have stopped us at some point.
"That was fucking hot, babe."
"You liked it?" I asked, looking at my hands twisting in my lap.
"Hu uh," he said, and I felt a knot grow in my stomach. Looking up, I tried not to let my eyes fill with tears at his negative answer, but I saw he still had that cat-eating-canary grin on his face. "I fucking loved that."
"Really?" Instead of smiling back as he probably expected, I tackled him and wrapped my body up in his. Kissing him again, I felt the tension and worry melt away, and felt myself soothed and eased by the reality that he had enjoyed our time, too. I guess I'd just needed to hear him say it.
"Does that mean we can do it again?" he asked.
Laughing, we continued to eat and feed each other by the fire, then made love carefully. Something had shifted, and although I'd been convinced before that night that we trusted each other as much as two people could, I knew something deeper and more profound had happened between us. I wasn't sure if it would ever happen again, but I had my suspicions.
More important than that, I had my Jasper.