Author's Note: I fell in love with the show after one episode, the season finale. I want to watch it all. So, sorry that I've been neglecting other stories. Some are being deleted, but I'm not sure which yet. I will be continuing my Bleach, Sherlock Holmes, and possibly my Inuyasha one. Sorry. Barney is just too full of awesome.
People Who Use People
So, he was in love. So what? She didn't love him back, he knew that much. What was the point of hanging around her when he was clearly irresistible to tons of other women in the world? They dated around for a while, but it was awkward, so there was no point in trying any longer. Let's just hope it doesn't kill him on the way.
It was just another night in the diner. Marshall and Lily were already there, chatting over a cup of tea. However, after a minute or two of talking, they began to kiss. Barney came in wearing what he believed to be his best suit in his closet, and approached them.
"People are trying to eat in here," he said, causing Lily to squeal and quickly pull away. Her face was as red as hair. He grinned, sitting down across from them. "What'd you order me?"
"Nothing," Lily replied. Barney gasped. "What? We didn't know you were coming!"
"Fine," he scoffed. "Got to do everything myself around here." He picked up a menu from another person's table and skimmed through it. The waitress came by with her little notepad.
"Can I help you?" She asked.
"Oh, yes, I'll have the cheeseburger and a Pepsi…" He looked up at her and smiled slightly. "And you… When do you get off?"
"Hahaha, nice try," she laughed, writing his order and walking away.
"Barney, do you have to flirt with the waitress?" A voice asked. It was Ted, who was walking in with Robin at his side. Barney immediately turned his eyes away from them.
"What are they dating, now?" He asked Marshall and Lily. He turned back to them, feeling his face grow hot when his eyes met Robin's. "Look at this, you guys. The idiot-duo has finally gotten together! Can you imagine what the kids are going to look like?" Robin said nothing and turned her face away from them, wiping a tear that was forming in her eye. "Dye your hair back, blondie."
"You're blonde, too," Ted pointed out.
"Yes, but I actually pull it off. You see…" Barney's voice trailed off as his eyes fell upon a girl approaching the group. She had waist length black hair, wore a blue dress, and had green eyes. Weird combination, he told himself, but she pulled it off. She was cute, but he didn't think she would be the type of person he would pursue. He shook it off and realized that while he was looking at the girl, his food was delivered. He took a sip of his Pepsi, wondering why that girl was approaching them anyway. Maybe she needed more salt or ketchup or something. But, if that were the case why didn't she just ask the waitress? He shrugged; he had no control over what someone else decides to do. He glanced over at Ted and Robin. Well, he thought, if they want to date, it's not my right to stop them.
"Robin," the girl said, "is that you?"
"Oh, Sharon!" Robin squealed hugging the girl tightly. Barney suddenly became interested in what was going on and looked up at them.
"How do you know each other?" he asked.
"Sharon used to be in the same high school class as me," she said, smiling. "It's been so long. Oh, Sharon," she turned to her friends, "this is Ted Mosby, Lily Aldrin and her husband Marshall Erickson, and…" she sighed when she came to Barney, "Barney Stinson." They all said their hellos to Sharon except Barney who started eating his burger in an attempt to avoid the whole thing.
"So, you guys, like best friends?" Marshall asked.
"Well, I wouldn't say best," Robin admitted sheepishly, "but we're pretty close, huh, Sharon?"
"Yeah. Well, listen, I got to go. It was nice seeing you again." She went in her purse and handed her a slip of paper. "Here's my number; call me."
"Will do," Robin smiled, hugging her friend once more. Sharon was halfway out of the diner before Barney sprung out of his seat, and sprinted towards her, knocking Ted on his way.
"Sorry, buddy," he said as he approached Sharon. "Hey."
"Uh, hey? Barney, right?"
"How sweet! You remembered my name. Ah, listen, do you want to go out somewhere?"
"Aw, come on. We can catch a movie and maybe…" He nudged her with his elbow, "head back to my apartment." He smiled.
"Listen, sweetheart," he said, taking a few strands of black hair and twiddling it between his fingers, "I can show you a good time."
"Puh-lease!" She growled, pulling her hair away from him. "I've been with guys like you before, Barney. You charm a girl, make her fall for you, and then you sleep with her. After that, you leave her, and then want nothing to do with her. So, just leave me alone." She tried to leave, but he ran in front of her to prevent her from doing so.
"You know, I love it when a girl plays hard to get," he smirked. He edged closer to her; she moved backward.
"You know, I love it when a guy knows when to give up," she smirked back.
"So, if I give up, you'll like me?"
"Shut up." She scoffed and left the diner. Barney knew he wasn't going to get anywhere with her and let her leave, but that didn't mean he was going to give up altogether. He would find a way to charm her.
On their way home from the diner, Barney wondered why Robin and Ted were walking the same way. He just assumed he was walking her home or something.
"Hey," he said. "Why are you walking with Ted?"
"Oh," Robin whispered. She looked up at Ted, and he nodded, meaning it was alright to tell him the truth. "The truth is I moved back in with Ted." Okay, he was not expecting that, and he was definitely not expecting his heart to drop like a rock at those words.
"Ah, congratulations. I thought you bought a new place or something. Or bought Don's place, seeing as how he doesn't need it anymore. You know, with him moving to Chicago and all."
"So," he started in an attempt to change the subject, "that girl, Sharon, what is she into?"
"Why? Do you like her?" Ted asked.
"Kinda. She's cute and all."
"Well," Robin began, "she loves getting flowers, chocolate, and walking down the beach hand in hand. She wants a guy who's not afraid to confess his love to her openly and embraces her when she's sad…." Her voice trailed off and she watched her feet as she walked with Ted. "…Good luck, Barney."
"Thanks. Can I have her number?"
"I don't think…" Before she could say anything else, he grabbed her purse, found the number, wrote it on his hand, threw her purse back, and ran away while her and Ted were yelling after him.
Barney sighed as he sat himself down when he got home. He looked at his hand and was pleased to find that it wasn't smudged or anything and was perfectly readable. He took out his cell phone and called.
"Hello?" A woman on the other line asked.
"Is this Sharon?" He asked. He didn't know her last name. Stupid, stupid, stupid! You should've asked Robin, you stupid idiot!
"Yes. Who is this?"
"Barney Stinson." He had a feeling she rolled her eyes when he told her.
"Listen, buddy, I told you to leave me alone. How did you get my number anyway?"
"Stole it from Scherbatsky," he replied with a grin that she could not see.
"Just leave me alone," she repeated. "I am not going out with you. I know your type."
"Just meet me by the park tomorrow," he urged her. "It's not for a date or anything…. It…" He looked around for an excuse and his eyes fell upon his calendar. "Robin's birthday is coming up and I wanted your help with a present."
"Why me? Doesn't she have other friends like Ted, Marshall or Lily?" Wow, she's good. She remembered everyone's names!
"Well…" he cleared his throat nervously. "I wanted your help because you know her better than any of the other guys. So what do you say? Help?" He heard her sigh on the other line and knew he had her right where he wanted her. He wasn't lying; Robin's birthday was coming up in about a month, but it's better to prepared. He'll just have to see where it went from there.
"Alright," she finally said, "but, it's only for Robin. Not a date because I don't like you."
"I know. What time tomorrow?"
"Alright, good night."
"Good night," he replied hanging up the phone. Right when he hung up his phone, he yelled "WOO!" and jumped on the couch. Then, he jumped off the couch, adjusted his tie, and headed to the kitchen for a glass of beer; he wouldn't drink scotch because Robin did.