I've been wanting to write this for a while. At last I've finally gotten on my butt and done it.


Trapped. Butters was trapped. Trapped against a wall, with no where to run, Cartman's hands on either side of his head.

"So," the word was laced with Cartman's heavy breath as he stood before him, blocking him off from the outside world with his girth, "let's say you and me get to this, huh."

"W-Well shucks, Eric," Butters said, never one to displease, "you are my best friend and all but I don't- I don't- I don't think I want to-"

"Want to?" Cartman laughed, a heavy laugh that made his body heave with the force. "There is no 'want'. I'm not giving you a choice. This isn't a 'want', this is something you'll DO."

Butters winced when Cartman brought his knee up to his crotch, letting out a keening noise, one of intense pain.

"Funny, I didn't think you had balls. I guess we'll have to find out, huh?"

Butters had thought that Eric had loved him, even though he treated him badly. Their relationship was secret, Butters could never tell about it, he was commanded not to. Everything was hush hush and behind doors. If any of the boys found out, w-well, Eric had said, he would be just downright furious, like his dad often got before grounding him.

But Eric already liked to take out his anger on Butters. That was why he liked him in the first place, he'd said, because he never told no secrets that didn't need telling. Once Cartman had told him that the bruises he'd left on Butter's neck would be their little secret, the action was sealed safe and shut in the back of Butter's mind. He would never tell. He wouldn't tell, because he loved Eric.

"Eric, please." The blonde squealed, pushing at Cartman's broad chest.

"Please, please, please! I thought you loved me, why won't you give me this? You're breaking my balls, Butters…"

Butters was a virgin. He was an innocent, pure virgin. Naïve. Sex wasn't something Butters thought about often, and when he did, he often cursed himself for it. Why, it was just downright dirty. He was supposed to have a girlfriend and think about bushes, or something, but instead, he'd let his entire family down. Butters didn't have a girlfriend, instead, he had Eric. Handsome Eric with his strong arms that would hold him so tightly, make him feel so secure. Yet those same arms were a double edged sword, and they would also often hit him as well.

'So sorry, Butters!'

'I didn't mean it, Butters!'

Excuses were given, and bruises formed, but Eric never truly hurt him badly. Just a scrape here and there, Butters told himself as he examined himself in the mirror. But still, he loved Eric. It was his fault, anyway, for his stupid face and being in Eric's way when he was so mad. Why, he deserved it. Yes, it was his fault. His stinking, dirty, no-good, rotten fault. He was bad, he was so bad, and that was why he dreamed of Eric at night and not Wendy.

"Eric please, I don't- I don't want to do this! Please don't, please stop!" It was useless, Cartman's mom was gone, and his neighbors, well, Butters sincerely doubted they would come to his rescue. Butters started to cry, sniffling at first as Eric grabbed his upper arm all the way around with one hand, and hauled him over to his bed.

He didn't want to have sex with Eric. He loved Eric, but he- he couldn't. He had to wait until marriage. With a girl. He wasn't supposed to be with Eric. He was a bad boy, bad bad bad.

Butters felt himself be thrown down on the bed, and he bounced with an 'oomph' sound. Immediately he turned to scrabble away, but Cartman pulled him back.

"It's okay, Butters, I love you, after all."

He squeezed his eyes shut, desperately trying to block it out. All of it out. Everything. Because- because- Eric was going to, try to, r- … r- …. Rape him? Inside, he felt like Jimmy. He just couldn't get the word out. It was too horrible to be true. Horrible, because Butters loved him, it didn't have to be like this.

But Eric couldn't wait for him, and Butters wanted to take it slow. He wanted to go out, a nice movie, a good dinner, snuggle on the couch, and then maybe- But not like this. No, never like this. But maybe it was punishment for thinking about Eric that way, for thinking about how he would like it.

"Now… now that we're all settled…" Cartman had him successfully pinned, his weight easing down on his arms and legs as he strattled his waist and held both of his wrists in one hand. Eric was so strong… Butter's heard beat quickly and loudly inside of his chest. It was tell-tale of what he felt, and Butters had already confessed. "Let's get this thing off, shall we?"

"E-Eric, what are you-"

But Butters' question was answered when Cartman's remaining hand moved to his eye patch. His left eye. His disgusting eye. His excuse for an eye. The one that he had lost as a child, playing ninja. Even now, he could barely look at it, could barely manage to see the mistake he had made, how ugly he had become. Shucks, how dare he be with Eric, when Eric was so handsome and smart, unlike him, with his ugly face and stupidity and the twisted, disgusting hole that was an excuse for an eye socket.

"Eric, Eric no!" Butters screeched, kicking his legs up and out. "Eric stop, Eric please, anything but that!" His voice had increased in decibel and hysteria. More then anything, he feared someone to gaze upon his mutilated eye socket, let alone Eric, who he loved. Eric wouldn't love him anymore once he saw it. No, Eric could never see it. Not Eric, not nobody.

"Come on, Butters," Cartman's voice was smooth honey, the kind that he used to manipulate people into getting what he wanted. And now, he was using it on Butters, although it was hardly the first time. "Just a little peek, and then I'll be done. We don't even have to have sex, how about that?"

Butter's heart rose in his throat, feeling both grateful and a bit rejected. He was terrified, yet- Eric wanted him, him, and now he didn't?

"W-Well golly, Eric…" Tears continued to pour down his face, but hearing his words, he was able to sniff and calm them a bit. "I- I'm scared. I don't want you to hate me. I don't want you to think I'm ugly. Please let's just go downstairs…"

"Butters, Butters," Cartman calmed him, or at least, tried to, "When did I say I'd think you were ugly? Come on, it was our fault that it happened to you in the first place."

The blonde shifted nervously, and Cartman's grip let up on his wrists a little. Butters knew already that it was going to bruise. Hesitantly, he relaxed. He was scared, nervous, but- but Eric promised him, right? He wouldn't hurt him… And it was better then what Butters thought he was going to do. Thought being the key word. How dare he think that Eric would do such a vile thing to him? After all, he was his knight in shining armor. Gallant and chivalrous.

Squeezing his eye shut from fear, Butters whimpered when he felt Eric let go of his hands, instead, to be placed on his face. They rested on his cheeks, before the left one moved slowly up, and touched the corner of his eye patch. Butters winced. He didn't like this, not one bit, but Eric wanted it, and pleasing Eric was all that mattered.

Above him, Butters heard an intake of breath as Cartman peeled away the rest of the patch. The feeling of cool air against his eye socket felt abnormal and strange. His heart leapt to his throat. Was Eric sickened? Would he hate him forever?

"Beautiful," Eric said, and Butters heart beat fast when he felt his hand reach out to touch the damaged skin.

"Eric don't!"

"Why?" Cartman asked, and Butters opened his single eye to stare fearfully up at his secret boyfriend.

"Because- Because you might- might hurt me." Butters chose his words carefully. Eric didn't like it when he was accused of something he didn't do, and Eric never hurt Butters.

"Hurt you?" Cartman purred. "I wouldn't hurt you, Butters, I just want to see, is all."

"You've seen, now, …please! Don't touch Eric, why-"

"Why… what?" His voice was almost dangerous, like a cobra laying in the grass, not yet poised, ready to attack.

Butters' heart pounded. "…N-Nothing, Eric."

"Good."

Butters cringed as he felt Cartman's fingers gently touch the outside of the crevice where his eye used to be. There were still bits of nerves there that picked up and reacted to his touch. In a strange sense, it was sensual as Cartman's fingertips felt deeper and deeper into his eye. But the second that he dug his nails in, that all changed.

Screeching didn't help at all as Cartman held down his legs and arms. Neither did writhing, as it only pushed in his fingers more. Butters screamed, shrieking in pain. How could Eric do such a thing? What was he being punished for? Hot blood gushed down his face. Inside of his chest, he felt betrayed, hurt.

"God yes," Cartman hissed, the cobra raising its head.

Against his leg, Butters felt something hard, an insult to injury as he realized that it was Cartman's erection. He cried, wailing, as tears poured down his cheek. The pain was immeasurable. It was lava, seeping through his body like a current. Hot.

Suddenly, Cartman let go of both his eye and his arms, and let Butters' hands jerk towards his face where he howled, rocking back and forth as blood tricked out through his fingertips. And he had hardly even dug in hard, either.

"Stop crying." Cartman commanded.

In return, all he got was agonized sobs.

"I told you to stop crying!"

Immediately, Butters stopped. So obedient, just like a little golden puppy. He hiccupped, and looked almost accusingly up at Cartman. Cartman merely shrugged it off.

"There, now, that wasn't hard, was it?"

Cartman reached out his hand and Butters flinched as he felt his hand in his hair. Oh, Eric. How could he have done such a thing to him? Was he supposed to trust him? But… he deserved it, didn't he? For being so ugly, for having such stupid expressions? It wasn't Eric that was at fault, it was him…

"But you know what is?" His voice was singsong, a lute that the cobra danced to.

Butters' eyebrows furrowed, and he looked up, fearfully.

"Me."

Sobs hitching in his throat, Butters struggled when his hand was ripped away from his eye, and clenched together once again by Eric's own hand. Air against his eye socket was not only now uncomfortably, but downright painful as well. He moaned.

"You're so thin, Butters," Cartman said, looking down at him with a haughty gaze, "why don't we get some meat on your bones? Eat a little once in a while." Eric laughed, although Butters didn't know why. He felt exposed and self conscious. He knew he was skinny, but he couldn't help it. Muscle never seemed to grow on him, and no matter how much he ate, it never stayed. His masculinity was in question, and Butters felt as though he should defend it.

But of course, he didn't.

Cartman moaned as he rubbed his hips against Butters' midsection. Butters squeezed his eye shut, feeling as though he would cry again. He felt used. Eric loved him, didn't he? So then why was he doing this… He got his look, shouldn't he let him go now? But he wouldn't dare ask. He felt used.

But it wasn't as if Cartman hadn't done this sort of thing before. Butters had given him blowjobs. It wasn't the same as sex. It was, as Eric called it, the easy way out. He wouldn't go to hell for that. Although, he was always happy to please Eric. Why would this time be any different? He felt honored that Eric would have such feelings for him…

"You know what I want?" Eric said, his voice husky.

Butters was almost afraid to ask what. "…What?"

"For us to do this more often." His reply was quick, almost cutting off Butters' syllable.

"Do wha-"

This time Butters was cut off, but not by Eric's voice. Instead, by his actions. Cartman grinded down against him before rubbing himself through his jeans. Undoing the button and then the zipper, Cartman pulled himself out of the confined space. His dick bobbed up. Stroking himself for a while, he panted, and then stopped.

"Open wide."

Parting his lips obediently, Butters wasn't prepared for what came next. Instead of Cartman's erection entering his mouth like it usually did, it rubbed against the inside of his missing eye. Butters' eye widened and he screeched, but Cartman held him down.

"Eric! Eric! ERIC ERIC STOP! NO, NO!"

Cartman merely hummed a reply, and began to thrust against him. It wasn't a very deep cavern, but it was around the right size, and damn it felt good. Like nothing he had felt before, certainly not like Butters' mouth. He moaned out in pleasure. The previous blood made a nice lubricant.

Underneath him, Butters twisted, shrieking in pain and terror. He could feel Cartman's erection in his eye, against his skull, pounding. It hurt. Like nothing he had felt before, it hurt. Both against his eye socket, and his heart. Once again he was betrayed. His dick felt larger then it actually was, since it was so close to him, invading him where something never should. The tender skin screamed out in agony, and he voiced that pain, writhing.

Ignoring him, Eric continued to give shallow thrusts, pumping himself against his face. His balls slapped against his cheek, and Butters' slumped back, the shock too great to handle. Cartman moaned, and increased his rhythm. Bile rose within Butters' throat. Honestly, he didn't know if he would live through this. Perhaps Eric would thrust through to his brain and kill him. And maybe, he thought, as Eric gripped his head and thrust needingly into him, his semen would burn away at his flesh and that would kill him instead.

However, none of those things happened. Instead, Cartman reached orgasm, throwing his head back and muttering Butters' name, and his cum gushed inside of his eye socket, spilling out when no room was left to hold it. He panted, enjoying the after haze of orgasm. And below him, Butters rolled away, Cartman letting go of his hands.

He spasmed, grabbing and clawing at his missing eye, trying to get the majority of the junk out of it as possible. It wasn't as easy as he had thought. Sobs wracked his body, spilling out from his mouth like the bile had threatened to do earlier. It was a disease, the pain and agony. His heart bled along with his eye. He knew that his blood and Eric's cum would stain his bed sheets for a long time, and would be reminded every time that he came over.

Because he would.

Because Butters was dependant on Eric. He couldn't ever leave him. Who would he have then? Butters wasn't attracted to girls, and the rest of the school wasn't gay. Nobody knew that Eric was gay, Eric didn't want people to know that he was a fag. Within Butters' mind, all there was, was the small town of South Park, Colorado. There would be no other men in his life. Just Eric. And that was how it would stay, no matter how it hurt him.

Butters sobbed and pushed himself up, looking over at Eric whose eyes were closed. Eyes. Plural. Eric was handsome. He hadn't done it to hurt him. Perhaps- it was possible- that- he thought he was attractive, as well? Yes, that was why… That was why he did it. Because he accepted him. He was not afraid of his eye. No, he loved it. That was why he did it.

The sobs retreated but the pain stayed. Butters reached over to touch Cartman's arm. The second that their skin touched, Cartman looked up, glowering, and Butters recoiled a bit. He picked up his eye patch and placed it back on, again self conscious.

"…I'm sorry, Eric." Butters knew that he hated to be called by his first name, but he couldn't help it. He loved him.

Eric didn't reply, but sat up, and Butters wormed his way next to him, desperate for positive attention. His heart ached. He needed it desperately. He hugged Cartman's midsection, moving his hands upward, feeling his large and not so muscular chest. Butters loved Eric like this, big and strong and, well, fat. Glancing down at him, Cartman grumbled and pushed him away.

Butters' heart dropped, and tears came once again to his remaining eye.

"I-"

"Stop talking."

And Butters did as he was told.

Silence stretched between them for a long time, before Cartman heaved himself up and sat up. Butters watched inquisitively as he moved off the bed and towards the door.

"Stay here, I think I know what we'll do tonight."

Doing what Eric had told him to do, Butters stayed put, and waited for his arrival. He perked up when Eric returned. His blood ran cold, however, when he saw what he had brought along with him.

"I told you that you were beautiful, Butters." Cartman said, admiring the knife in the doorway. "But, how would you like to become more beautiful?"

His eye widened, and survival mode kicked in. Butters was in danger. Serious danger. And the only person who ever saved him was Eric. He began to hyperventilate, terror seeping into his blood stream and travelling all the way down to his toes and finger tips like a poison.

"I told you that you needed to get some meat on your bones, but I guess we might as well just take a little bit more off."


Review and Butters will still be missing only one eye. Or, if you're like me, we can make the count up to two!