Hopelessly Devoted

Chapter 4: Trust, Part ii

WARNING: This chapter depicts acts of homosexual relations. Be advised that this chapter is explicit. All relations depicted are fully consensual.


On Saturday, practice was a little lackluster. Hanai was trying his best to stay in charge and deflect incessant questions, and Mihashi just wanted the day to be over so he could get on with his birthday present. Luckily, practice wrapped up at two that day, and the battery was on the train to Gunma as fast as humanly possible.

It had been a lot to work out, and had required more phone calls than Abe was comfortable with, but when they arrived at the inn, it was clear that it was worth every headache.

"The... the bath is... right outside the door..." Mihashi cooed in awe when they got to their room.

"Yeah," Abe said. "It's private."

"This...must have been..."

"Mihashi, stop thinking about the price, would you?"

Mihashi let out something like a meep, and raced to the bed to throw off his bag and collapse into it.

"Do you want to eat?" Abe said, setting his things down and sitting on the foot of the bed.

Mihashi figeted.

When Abe shot a hard look at him, Mihashi stuttered "Is...Takaya...hungry?"

"I asked you, Ren. You're in charge. This is your night, okay?"

"Ah," he said, nodding, and then turning a dark shade of pink.

Abe raised an eyebrow.

"Then, if it's okay...with you...I'd like to...do... something else..."

Abe was already taking off his shirt by the word "do."

It started off slowly, as it always did when they had the option of taking their time, Mihashi crawling on top of Abe and peppering him with gentle kisses on his face and neck, until the electricity of those sensations caught up with them. Soon Abe's hands were searching under his lover's shirt, stroking his back with wide, hot palms, and Mihashi reciprocated, trembling fingers petting across Abe's chest, brushing nipples only incidentally. Soon they were hard, and Mihashi was pressing, grinding mindfully but not desperately.

There was no need to be desperate tonight.

Heat was rising in Abe's face, and he pulled Mihashi into a long, hard kiss. Tongues tangled, and the pitcher let out a moan into the catcher's lips. Abe abandoned Mihashi's mouth and kissed behind his ear, advancing to suck on the lobe and biting at the edge in the way that always made the pitcher squirm and pant.

"Ta-ka-yaaa," he groaned, grinding harder, fingers digging into Abe's sides. Abe leaned up and pulled off Mihashi's shirt (with some awkward difficulty), and once Mihashi was free again, he pressed back down on Abe and sucked hot, open-mouthed kisses onto his chest and stomach. He responded by tangling his hands in Mihashi's scruffy hair and thrusting against his partner's thigh.

Mihashi took the hint and shimmied down so that he could undo Abe's pants. Once unfastened, Mihashi dipped a hand under the waistband, heaving a sigh and giving a stroke that derailed Abe's attempt to also get into Mihashi's underwear with his hands too.

"Ren, Ren...yes..." he moaned, writhing under his touch. Abe threw his head back and heaved his chest up, heaving and squirming as Mihashi stroked and pinched and pulled at Abe's hardening genitals.

"God...God...Ren..." Abe groaned.

Mihashi was– for a change from their usual, frantic, stolen-moment lovemaking– taking time to appreciate the sight and sense of having Abe respond underneath him. As he continued pumping with one hand, the other stroked hard up Abe's hipbone, up to his chest and over his neck. Mihashi let out a quiet moan, and then wrapped his hand around Abe's jaw. He took a moment to appreciate the moans and tremors he elicited from his lover by pressing his knee gently up against his lover's testicles. Then he leaned forward and pushed his first two fingers into Abe's mouth and against his tongue.

Abe grunted and opened his eyes lazily. He felt wanton and a little slutty, letting his mouth be invaded like that, but it was a new move, and it was exciting and very sexy. Mihashi shuddered as Abe began putting on a show, raising his arms and clutching the pillow above his head with needy fists. Abe twisted his torso and sucked on Mihashi's pressing, spit-soaked fingers.

Mihashi got overwhelmed at this, and his strokes slowed as he became dizzy with fever. Sensing this, Abe pulled Mihashi's fingers out of his mouth, and whispered "Let me?"

Mihashi nodded lazily, and undid his own pants with fumbling hands. When all further restrains were kicked off, he crawled his naked torso up Abe's body and gripped the headboard as hot breath hit his member.

"Mm," Abe said, running his hands over Mihashi's buttocks appreciatively. He sucked on the base of Mihashi's penis, making him cry out eagerly. Abe leaned up to pull the head into his mouth and consumed it with a satisfied murmur. Mihashi immediately pushed his hips forward to encourage a deeper consumption. Abe sucked hard as they found a comfortable rhythm in Mihashi's thrusts.

"Yes, yes, yes, Taka..." Mihashi moaned, one of his fists having found home tangled in the back of Abe's hair.

Suddenly, Abe pulled away, and Mihashi barely eked out a disbelieving protest.

"Ren, do you want me to stop so that you can...put it in me?"

Mihashi shook his head frantically. "D..don't stop...please," he squeaked.

Abe obliged and took him back in his mouth. After a few more thrusts punctuated with heated moans, Mihashi gripped Abe's shoulders and whispered breathily, "A...finger...Taka..."

Abe, mouth full, could only murmur a "Hmm?"

"Please," he panted, "please put a finger in me..."

Abe hesitated only a moment, having never been asked to enter him before, but without breaking his rhythm, he crept a hand in between Mihashi's legs and pressed around to find the hole.

"Yes...hurry...Taka...ya..." Mihashi moaned, suddenly thrusting in that short, frantic way that meant his was close.

Abe found the crevice and pressed in, surprised at how easily his digit entered without any lubrication at all. He only had a second to press in deeper by an inch by the time Mihashi was coming, hard and heaving and bucking into Abe's mouth.

Abe had intended to swallow, but somewhere in the climax they had disconnected and Mihashi shot his load all over Abe's face.

"Ah...ah..." Mihashi huffed, trying to form sounds into an apology and failing. Abe panted, watching Mihashi's member twitch toward relaxation with the one eye that wasn't stinging. He slipped his finger out and leaned back into the pillows with a hard sigh.


"I'm so sorry," Mihashi said as he wiped Abe's face off (which only happened after Mihashi relearned how to use his legs and located the tissues on the table on the other side of the room.)

"It's okay," Abe said. "I've done it to you enough times."

Once they were clean, Mihashi cuddled up against Abe's chest.

"What can I do...for you?" he asked.

"Hmm?" Abe said, stroking Mihashi's hair.

"You...didn't come yet."

"Ah, um," Abe said, fumbling with the possibilities in his mind. "You... just want to use your hands?"

Mihashi's brows furrowed as he drew tiny, suddenly nervous little circles with his fingers on Abe's chest.

"Do you...want to...put it in me, Takaya?"

Abe sighed, petting Mihashi's hair harder in a way that gave away how much he liked the idea.

"It's okay," Abe said, "you don't have to."

Mihashi's breath hitched in a way that Abe couldn't interpret.

"But..." he began, "it's not fair..."

Abe sat up at little.

"Ren, I told you," he said, recalling the other two times Mihashi had brought up the subject. "You don't have to worry about me."

Suddenly Abe sensed Mihashi's shift to stillness. His fingers dug into the catcher's hip for only a second, and then he was crying.

Abe shot up, fearful. "Ren? Ren, what's wrong? Oh no, Ren..." Mihashi covered his face and shuddered as Abe pulled him into an embrace.

"I...hate it..." Mihashi eked between quiet cries.

"Ren?" Abe asked nervously, stroking Mihashi's back.

"I hate it...when you...say that..."

Abe had no idea what Mihashi was talking about, but pulled him closer and rocked him gently anyway.

"Ren, I don't understand. Please, I don't want to make you cry on your birthday."

Mihashi sniffed and pulled away far enough from Abe's shoulder to catch his breath, and after a beat, gave in to a teary tirade.

"You always say that... not to worry about you...you don't let me, ever, and..." his rambling paused to may way for one hard sob, "and I want to worry, and I want to know your dreams, and I want to know what your worksheet says, and I want you to put it in me because I like it, and you always think you're doing me favors but you...you..." and then Mihashi finally lost it.

Abe hugged his lover close again, guilty with understanding. His eyes welled up when he whispered, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Ren. I'm so stupid..."

Mihashi cried a little longer, and once he became quiet, Abe whispered that he loved him, and again that he was sorry, and Mihashi nodded and they dried their tears in the sheets. After a few minutes of silence, Abe spoke.

"I'm going to university, Ren," Abe said.

Mihashi sat up, stared at him with hot, red-rimmed eyes.


"I'm going to study physical therapy. Sports medicine."

Mihashi just blinked.

"I want... to help athletes with injuries."

"You're going to be a doctor?" Mihashi said.

Abe bared down on himself- hearing it bluntly seemed very ambitious, a little haughty- but he nodded. He wanted to be a doctor.

His guilt about keeping his plans from Mihashi had grown exponentially after his talk with Hanai. He thought that finally revealing his plans would be freeing, but that feeling didn't come on as quickly as he'd hoped.

"W...why, Takaya?" Mihashi asked quietly, full of curiosity and without accusation.

"When I got hurt..." Abe began, "I thought about Haruna."

Mihashi bit his lip.

"Getting injured was scary. For a second, I thought I understood why he was so terrified of being hurt. It stuck with me for so long... but then you hurt your hand. I just... want to know as much as possible... so that if anything happens to you..."

"Takaya..." Mihashi said, eyes rimmed with tears again, "You..."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Ren. I didn't want you to-"

"Worry?" Mihashi finished, with an overtone of disapproval.


Abe rolled over on his side to look Mihashi in the eyes.

"I'm really not good enough to be a pro," Abe said. "Otherwise, I'd try and be your catcher forever. But... that's not something I could have promised anyway. I wanted to be a part of your career, but I really- I want to know more about taking care of athletes. And take care of kids so they can play again as soon as possible. It's what I want to do. And I can take care of you, too."

Suddenly Abe remembered a scene from years ago, when he took the hand of a weeping freshman pitcher, and moved by his dedication, vowed to devote himself to the pitcher's success. Swore to make him a real ace.

That was the moment that he became utterly, hopelessly devoted to Mihashi.

"I can also learn about massage and training and weightlifting- there's a sports physician program I was looking at. I can learn a lot of things. Get certified for things. We won't be together the whole time, but if you'll wait for me-"

"Takaya," Mihashi said, smiling, "thank you."

"I..." he began, and Mihashi pulled him into an embrace.

"I'm really glad... there's something you're excited about."

Abe smiled and squeezed Mihashi tight.

"So... it's okay?"

Mihashi laughed a little.

It was okay.

Mihashi almost felt a tinge of guilt, wondered if Abe was doing this for him, and wondered if he deserved it. But he knew better. He knew to fight those demons of doubt and guilt now. It was because of Abe that he could, after all.

"Ren?" Abe said. Mihashi looked up at him.

"I'm happy," he said, new tears rolling down his cheeks silently. "I'm really happy."

Abe choked up and hugged him close.

"Do you want to take a bath?" he asked after a minute.

Mihashi nodded and wiped his eyes. "Yeah."


The suite had, as advertised, an attached private outdoor bath. They grabbed their baskets, stocked with yukata and towels, and Abe stopped short when Mihashi didn't follow him outside.

"B... be right there!" he called, fumbling in his overnight back for something.

Abe didn't take his time sinking into the bath, sliding in until the water reached his chin. He heaved a satisfactory sigh, and a moment later, Mihashi joined him. Mihashi put down his basket and stepped down the rock steps of the bath, splashing ungracefully. He may have not really regained the full use of his legs after all.

"Come on," Abe said, beckoning him near. "It feels nice, doesn't it?"

Mihashi nodded, and drew absentminded little circles with his toes under the water.

"This was a good present," he said, closing his eyes.

"I'm glad you think so," Abe replied, running a hand along Mihashi's thigh.

"It must have cost so mu-" Mihashi began, but Abe shut him up with a kiss. When Abe pulled away, Mihashi continued talking, suddenly about something completely different.

"It feels so selfish, if you're going to university to study to take care of me."

Abe raised his eyebrow, because this was exactly why he had wanted to keep his plans from the pitcher in the first place.

"I made the decision myself," he said. "Because it's what I wanted to do."

Mihashi blushed and murmured, "You don't...mind? Following me?"

Abe blinked. "Obviously." He leaned forward and kissed Mihashi on the forhead.

"Now, can I say something really selfish?"

Mihashi's eyes widened, and he nodded eagerly.

Abe leaned in to whisper in Mihashi's ear. "I've been so hot since you suggested I top. Can we...?"

"Oh! Yes!" Mihashi yelped, scrambling over to his basket. He came back with a tube of lubricant and a condom.

Abe twitched a little. "You...were ready..."

Mihashi turned pink.

Soon Mihashi was leaned over the edge of the pool, chest pressed into the surprisingly cool tiled rocks of the outdoor floor. They kneeled on the steps with the water at their thighs, bodies exposed to the warm air. Mihashi's hips jerked as Abe pressed a finger in, easier this time as it was slicked with lotion.

"Do you want...another?" Abe asked. Mihashi grunted consent.

Another finger went in, and Mihashi cooed a happy sound against the ground.

"It's easier... than I thought it would be," Abe said. Mihashi groaned a bit as Abe moved his fingers around.

"I...practice...sometimes..." Mihashi mumbled.

"You practice?" Abe choked.

"With...a toy..." Mihashi explained. Abe froze for a moment, the image of Mihashi pleasuring himself with a foreign object rocketing his cock to full attention. He could only barely audibly squeak "a...t...toy?"

Mihashi rocked his hips back a little, begging for more. Abe pushed around a little more, barely managing finger three.

"What...kind of toy...?" Abe said, now stroking himself.

"P...plug..." Mihashi gasped, growing impatient with talk. "M...more...please..."

Abe was almost numb with arousal, and decided right then that Mihashi was probably prepared enough.

"You want me to...do it? Ren?"

"Yes, yes...please..." he begged.

Abe put on the condom as quickly as he could, slathering it with lube as Mihashi continued quiet, yearning whimpers.


Abe positioned himself, biting his lower lip as he pressed the tip in.

"Agh," he grunted. "Is it okay? Ren?"

Mihashi's only response was bucking backwards onto Abe's cock, pushing him in halfway. The both shouted at this motion, and Abe froze.

It felt good. So good.

"M...more! P..please!"

"All the way?" Abe asked, voice strangled with restraint.

"Fill...me...Takaya!" he moaned.

Abe did not need to be told a third time. Especially not when it was... phrased like that.

He thrust, pushing himself all the way into Mihashi. The recipient responded with a squeaking, breathy moan.

It was so good, Abe feared he might come at the tail end of that first thrust. But coming meant being done, and he didn't want it to be over yet. He wanted more.

"T- Takaya!" Mihashi yelped, "You have to move!"

Abe quickly moved his hands to grip Mihashi's hips and began a careful thrusting- out and in and back out again. It was slow, and he savored the sensation, biting back a threatening climax.

It was miles above the feeling of Mihashi's mouth or hands. It was so tight, so slick, so hot, and so good.

"Ah... it feels so... big...inside..." Mihashi crooned, pitching his hips back against his catcher as he thrust.

If Abe wasn't aroused enough by the act of fucking Mihashi alone, these little things Mihashi kept saying were making it nearly impossible to keep in control of himself. He felt himself slip in to a wanton patronization, aching for more dirty talk.

"Big, huh?" he grunted, slapping hard against his partner. "Bigger than your toy?"

"Ah...much...much bigger," Mihashi responded without missing a beat.

"Oh God..." Abe said. He couldn't believe they were talking like this. It was so sexy, he thought he was going to pass out.

"D... does it feel good?" Abe asked.

"Ugh..." Mihashi moaned, and it was no wonder he couldn't form any more words, the way Abe was railing on him.

"Do you like it..." Abe began, swallowing hard before willing the rest of the sentence to leave his mouth. "Do you like... getting fucked?"

"Aggggh!" Mihashi heaved, his elbows buckling underneath him. He apparently enjoyed the dirty talk too. Abe did not want to disappoint.

"Do you like it when I talk like that?" he asked, wrapping his hand around Mihashi's neglected penis. Mihashi may have nodded, or maybe he had lost all motor control completely.

"Do you like it when I fuck you in the ass?" Abe went on, revelling by the violent words, unable to supress the naughty grin Mihashi would never see.

"Ugh...ugh...ugh..." Mihashi groaned.

"You like getting fucked by my big cock, Ren?" Abe shouted.

"Aggghhhh!" Mihashi cried, spilling his load into Abe's hand.

"Oh, Ren...Ren...I'm gonna..."

"Y...yes, Abe!" Mihashi panted. "Come... inside me!"

Though they were using a condom, this declaration inspired in Abe the vision of filling Mihashi's asshole with cum, and that vision was just this side of too much for Abe to handle, waves of orgasm beginning to flood his system.

"Oh, Taka-!" Mihashi groaned.

"Yes, yes, oh God, oh God, yes-" Abe cried as his final thrusts edged him to the end.

After cleaning up, the two were so hot that they wanted to be as far away from the bath as possible. Sprawled across the bed, the two were limp and fuzzy from exertion and what were the best orgasms of their entire lives.

"So...amazing..." Abe mumbled.

Mihashi smiled, but Abe couldn't see it.

"Oh my God..." Abe continued.

Mihashi chuckled.

"It's not even my birthday..." he went on.

"I liked it too," Mihashi said.

"Mmm, good."

"I liked it when you... said those things at the end."

Abe turned as much as he was able, and saw Mihashi blushing furiously.

"M...me too," Abe said. He flopped a limp hand over Mihashi's head and pat his hair.

Out of the moment, the things they had said during sex sounded awfully corny. They kept this sentiment to themselves.

"I want to try it..." Mihashi said.

"Try what?"

"Next time. When I'm...on top. I want to...say those things..."

Abe gathered all of his strength to suppress a chuckle. In his mind, Mihashi saying the things he had said that night sounded kind of ridiculous. His mind-Mihashi couldn't get past 'do you like it when I...'

Though he did admit to himself that if were they actually doing it, it would probably sound amazing.


The next morning, Mihashi felt two things.

One was the happiness of knowing Abe's plans. Now the future was not such a mystery- it was still a mystery, of course, but now they had guidelines, a faded, hastily-drawn map at the least.

The second was the incredible pain in his backside, which carried over through lunch with Ruri and her end of the family, and into practice the next day, cluing everyone on the team in to what had happened over the weekend.

"You switched positions, huh?" Tajima said, too loudly in the changing room that morning.

Mihashi leered, which threw Tajima back a bit. Mihashi didn't usually leer, but he was also not usually in enough pain to have to walk like a duck around the field.

Tajima had a knack for turning the battery's personal pain into amusement for the rest of the team. The first time Mihashi and Abe had done it, Abe was the one who was short and angry with everyone, and walked a little funny. Though he had been way better at hiding it than Mihashi turned out to be able to, Tajima's pressing questions bore fruit when he shouted, "AH! I get it, you were the pitcher!"

Which he thought was veiled enough, for some reason, to get past the rest of the team, but they put two and one together pretty quickly, and suddenly everyone knew Abe had lost his virginity.

"Could you not tell the whole team this time?" Abe said over Tajima's shoulder.

"Sure thing, boss," he said with a grin, and bounced to the other side of the room to harass Hanai.

Mihashi wondered if It felt this bad for Abe every time he'd bottomed.

As if he'd read his mind, Abe said quietly, "It's not so bad after the first time."

Mihashi wished it was consolation for this time.

He was really, really happy there was no practice game today.