Series: Trek Pod

Title: You Don't Have To Be My Boyfriend

Subtitle: The Real Kobayashi Maru

Inspired by the song: Just Friends (Sunny) by Musiq Soulchild

Lyric excerpt:

I'm not tryna pressure you,
Just can't stop thinkin' 'bout you,
You ain't even really gotta be my girlfriend.
I just wanna know your name
And maybe sometime
We can hook up, hang out, just chill...

Pairing: K/S

Rating: T for nudity and allusions to sexual situations

Summary: Academy fic AU. The first time Cadet Jim Kirk saw a mysterious hot Vulcan professor he knew he didn't just want him to be another notch on his bed post. After watching several women be shot down by him, Jim decides to take a completely different approach. He is going to try to be his friend.

This is the second Trek Pod story. This story will have a lot less angst and soap opera behavior in it than its predecessor.

Trek Pod stories will not be your traditional song fic stories. This is not parody. Instead, the songs are to function as a prompt.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything recognizable.


The first time he saw him it was a Tuesday. It was just after he failed the Kobayashi Maru for the first time. He says first time, because he already knew he was taking this test again. He doesn't believe anything is impossible.

At the moment he was beyond angry and just sat in his seat for a while as everybody else left. He probably stayed in that room for an additional 15 minutes trying to figure out what he could have done differently. Eventually he had to leave. As he was pushed out of the room by a overwork student in charge of setting up the simulation for the next victim, he saw this beautiful man walk out of the observation room and into the main hallway.

It was not unusual for Jim to notice if a man was beautiful. It was 2257 and it was perfectly acceptable for a guy with a skirt chasing reputation to occasionally find a member of the same sex attractive. Pre Warp views of sexual orientation were a thing of the past. He was a proud pansexual. Modern constructs of masculinity were no longer tide into who you slept with.

This man was beyond attractive. He was tall, dark, and mysterious with a light green complexion. His body language screamed sexual creature, even if he wasn't trying. He seemed like something out of earth's classical period of art. There was something in his eyes that just hinted at something deep underneath the surface. It seemed like there was something there that wanted to get out, but could not.

The ears were a dead giveaway that he was Vulcan. The head to toe black also told Jim that he was a professor. For a moment, he wondered what was underneath the black uniform.

So caught up in his observations that he ran straight into the mysterious Vulcan professor, causing him to drop his PADD to the ground. He was usually not this caught up with anyone. He quickly reaches down to pick it up and he handed it to the object of his observations. He feels a rush of electricity as one of his fingers gently brush the man's hand. He's never felt anything like this, but he heard it described before.

One night when he was 12, right after his mom divorced Frank, she got completely trashed and finally told him about how she fell in love with his father. His mom was a lot like him before she met his dad. His mom was quite "popular" with men and women from multiple planets. Then one day during her second year at the academy she ran into another student as she was trying to get to class on time. When he tried to help her with her things she described feeling the same electric shock/fireworks that he felt now. From a first touch his mom knew that she wanted to know the person that became his dad beyond the carnal.

Jim felt the exact same way from just one touch. He knew he wanted to get to know this person. Before he has time to say anything the mysterious man was already down the hall.

From that moment forward, he was on the lookout for his mysterious Vulcan professor that he didn't have a name for. Since he didn't have a name for him, Jim started calling him Sexy Vulcan Professor in his head.

He probably could easily find out his name through the academy database. He doubted there would be that many Vulcan professors at the academy, especially one that seemed to be the embodiment of sex. However, that felt like cheating to him.


Two days after the first time he saw Sexy Vulcan Professor, he saw him sitting with a group of students that were probably from one of his classes in the cafeteria discussing something. The lovely Uhura was among the group. Everybody's attention was focused on Sexy Vulcan Professor.

Afterwards he was close enough to hear Uhura invite Sexy Vulcan Professor for "coffee." His response of "Vulcans do not drink coffee," in the most snotty voice possible, had Jim laughing even though he shouldn't be. He wondered if Sexy Vulcan Professor was aware that coffee was a euphemism for sex on this planet. Uhura called Sexy Vulcan Professor impossible as she left the dining hall in a state of absolute anger or maybe it was sexual frustration.

A few days later he saw Sexy Vulcan Professor chatting with that first year medical student that Bones tried to set him up with a couple of weeks ago in an effort to get Jim to give up his "highly likely to get a STI" lifestyle. Nothing really happened. Jim really didn't feel any connection with Cadet Chapel and if he tried to turn her into one of his normal conquest, Bones was going to do horrible things to him with a hypo.

Apparently Cadet Chapel was not Sexy Vulcan Professor's type either. In his normal voice he told her, "Vulcans do not go to nightclubs." She then invited him to go to the same barbecue place that they went on their date a few weeks ago as she tried to grab his arm. His response was a quick and snotty, "I am a vegetarian," as he quickly pushed her away and continued on to wherever he was going.

For two weeks Jim watched both cadets and professors get shot down with various comments by Sexy Vulcan Professor such as:

"Vulcans do not drink."

"Vulcans do not go to bars."

"Vulcans do not party."

"Vulcans do not go to illegal raves with underage cadets. There's a nice cadet around your age from Russia in one of my classes that I can introduce you to."

"Vulcans do not go to fundraising events with their fellow faculty members." He was pretty sure Sexy Vulcan Professor just didn't want to go. However, Jim was sure Sexy Vulcan Professor would look great in a tuxedo.

"Vulcans do not "hook up", Cadet Chapel. However if you are still in need of a tutor for biology, please consider one of the cadets that have already obtained their medical degree." Jim wondered if Sexy Vulcan Professor was aware of the type of tutoring Cadet Chapel was interested in.

"I do not need to see your dorm room. I have a perfect memory and remember what they look like from when I was a student."

"Cadet Uhura, I am fully aware of what an invitation for coffee really means on earth. I am your professor and it would be inappropriate for me to engage in coitus with you."

Just the fact he use words like "coitus" made Sexy Vulcan Professor even hotter. Actually, his whole demeanor made Sexy Vulcan Professor even sexier. There's just something inherently hot about a guy who could turn down that many women without flinching.

The fact that Sexy Vulcan Professor turned down Cadet Uhura more than once told Jim that he was either not in to women or was a stickler for the rules. The first one would work in his favor, but the second one would not. Even though he was less than a year from graduating, thanks to his accelerated course load and previous college credit, he was still a cadet. A professor sleeping with the cadet could cause a scandal under the right circumstances, especially if that cadet was the son of a dead war hero with a notorious reputation for sleeping around with everyone.

If Sexy Vulcan Professor was as straight laced as Jim thought he was his normal techniques were not going to work. He already knew better than to suggest "coffee" or a tour of his dorm room. He gathered from overhearing several conversations between Sexy Vulcan Professor and Uhura that he taught in the linguistics department. Unfortunately, Jim tested out of his language requirement and would have no legitimate excuse to engage his tutoring services.

After the divorce, he went with his mom when she did contract jobs off planet where he picked up a lot of different languages. Sam was gone by then. Testing out of his language requirement was the only good thing about that part of his life.

There was no way this guy was going to sleep with Jim if he stuck to his normal methods. However, Jim didn't just want sex from Sexy Vulcan Professor, he wanted everything. If he couldn't have sex, he would just go for everything else. Therefore, Jim decided he would try to be Sexy Vulcan Professor's friend.

Three weeks after seeing him for the very first time, Jim decided to actually talk to Sexy Vulcan Professor. That didn't go so well. Actually the first time he tried to get with Uhura went better.

All Jim wanted to do was get his name and contact information so they could hang out some other time. He was up front that he did not necessarily want Sexy Vulcan Professor to be his boyfriend. He just thought it would be good if they could be friends. Jim should just be happy that the guy didn't say "Vulcans do not have friends" or experience a live demonstration of how much stronger Vulcans are than humans. He did mention Vulcan superior strength when Jim offered to carry his bag.

When Jim gave him his contact information he did not even bother to write it down. When Jim tried to get his name he responded with, "My full name is unpronounceable to humans." When Jim asked him if they could hang out sometime Sexy Vulcan Professor walked off with out even responding.

Enhancing the misery of the entire situation was Uhura saw the entire thing. She was still laughing.

"Jim you have a better chance of finding my first name out, then you do finding Spock's first name. If I don't have a chance with him, you don't either. I didn't even know you liked guys. I thought you preferred farm animals." She said with a malicious laugh.

"You don't know me. Although, thank you for telling me his name." Jim said with a wink as he left her behind.

So Sexy Vulcan Professor's name was Spock. It suited him. At least now, Jim had the name of his most current obsession.


Jim was absolutely shocked when three days later after the felt attempt to become Spock's friend he received a simple text message asking him if he play chess. He sent a quick message back saying he didn't but he always wanted to learn. It seems that the sexy Vulcan professor known as Spock was perfectly willing to teach him.

They met in one of the park like areas on campus. They sat at one of the tables designed to play chess. It even had the chess board painted on to the table.

"I am surprise you contacted me. You didn't even bother to takedown my contact information when I gave it to you. By the way you walked away, I expected to never see you again." Jim said as he made the first move of their third match. The first two matches were mostly spent teaching Jim the basic rules of the game.

He never really learned before because his mom couldn't play and his step dad didn't have the intellectual capacity necessary for the game. It was ashamed because according to his aunt, on his father side, his dad loved the game.

"Your assumption was illogical. I merely walked away from you because if I allowed you to continue with your thinly veiled attempt to seduce me, I would have been late for my introduction to Vulcan class." Spock said making a move that Jim knew would have him losing the game within minutes.

"I wasn't hitting on you. I specifically told you that I didn't need you to be my boyfriend. I just want to get to know you better."

"After spending many years on this planet, I have learned that when a humans says that it is usually a veiled attempt to hide their desire to just engage in sexual intercourse with the desired party."

"I'm not like most humans."

"No, you are not. I find you very intriguing." He feels Spock's finger brush against his as he moves the chess piece. Jim sees those same fireworks again.


After the first chess lesson, Spock offers to do this again some other time. Over the next two weeks, they meet every two or three days in the park after classes to play. After the first week, Jim stops losing in less than 20 minutes. By the second week, he actually manages to go an entire hour without losing. Jim normally hates losing, but he is perfectly OK with it because this means he gets to spend more time was Spock.

During their matches in the park they talk about all sorts of things. Jim tells Spock about his truly dysfunctional childhood and his teenage years being raised by his mom as they wandered from planet to planet. Spock starts telling Jim stories about what it was like to be an ambassador's son.

After the first two weeks, they are more comfortable with each other and Spock is now convinced that Jim isn't just doing this to get in his pants. Their chess matches now alternated between Spock's upscale apartment and Jim's tiny dorm room. He's just glad he was finally able to get a single this semester. It's hard dealing with a roommate when you're at least five years older than everyone you are put with.

Eventually Spock tells Jim about what it was like to be the half human kid on Vulcan. Jim eventually tells Spock about what it was like being the son of that guy who died to save 800 people. Spock is the first person that has truly ever understood him.

By the end of the second month of chess matches he really does consider Spock his friend, maybe even his best friend. The matches are less about the game and more about hanging out with each other. The conversations keep getting deeper as time goes on. Jim now knows why Spock does not want to go back to Vulcan. Apparently Spock's father disowned him because he chose to enlist in Starfleet instead of attending the Vulcan Science Academy.

Jim finally tells Spock the real reason why he skips his midterm on Tarsus IV for the class Jim refers to as the History of Genocide 101 the day before after Spock yelled at him in a very Vulcan way for 20 minutes. It's the first time Jim tells anybody what happened to him. He tries not to talk about the massacre or the dead bodies. He tries not to think about watching his friends be murdered in front of him. Even Bones doesn't know.

A week later when Jim is given a makeup test on a completely different subject. He is positive his sexy Vulcan professor friend pulled some strings.


He's pissed off at his sexy Vulcan friend after he fails the Kobayashi Maru for the second time. He may have completely fried the simulation this time. Instead of being Kicked out of the simulation by the overwork student like last time, Spock was the one who kicked him out of the room. Although really it's more like an invitation to go back to Spock's apartment.

"If I didn't know you so well, I would think you were a complete masochist." Jim said as soon as they walked into Spock's apartment. Even though he was pissed at him, he still rather be at Spock's apartment then with Bones. At least Spock will not find his attempt to beat the test completely insane. At least not after the last debate. "You know most people would be worried if nobody could pass a test that they designed." He said as he threw his body into the very comfortable couch in the apartment.

"The purpose of the test is not to beat the test. It is not that type of test. I have explained this to you before, yet you continued to miss the point." Spock said handing Jim one of the real beers that he kept in the apartment just for Jim.

"Trust me I get the point, I just think it's stupid. You know I don't believe in no wins scenarios otherwise I would have stop trying to be your friend when I saw you shoot down all those little girls trying to get in your pants. Its moments like these I wish you kept something harder in your apartment. I'm going to need something harder if I'm going to listen to you explain the real purpose of the test again." He said taking a drink as he remembered what happened last time.

It wasn't pretty. It was their first major fight during the course of their friendship. Spock made the mistake of saying that all captains should be able to face death and mention Jim's father by name. That resulted in screaming, yelling, and certain pieces of furniture being broken. He honestly wished Spock had a door that he could slam at that moment.

"At the time I said those things, I was not aware that mentioning your father in such a context would elicit such a powerful response from you. I apologized for my behavior and we will not bring up the subject again. Therefore, you will not need to consume unhealthy quantities of liquor. Also, it is illogical to keep hard liquor on hand anyway, because the substance has no affect on me whatsoever. Vulcans are not intoxicated by alcohol."

He was about to interrupt and asked Spock why he kept real beer in his house when it had no affect on him, but Spock continued. "I also find it disconcerting when you drink yourself into unconsciousness." Spock said it as if he did that all the time. It was one time and it was his birthday. Jim had the absolute right to get completely wasted on his birthday. Although he kind of like the fact that Spock was worried about him. Not that Vulcans admitted to worrying about anyone. Apparently worrying was an emotion.

"So you weren't being snotty and pretentious when you told those girls that you don't drink." He said not wanting to talk about that particular bender.

"I was not snotty."

"Yes you were. You're quite good at it."

"You are going to take the test again, are you not?"

"It's only been five months and you already know me too well. This is why you're my best friend. It is best you don't ask too many questions that way you'll have plausible deniability." Jim said squeezing Spock's hand. It was kind of weird. Jim was the only one that Spock let make direct hand contact with him. Jim saw it as a sign that Spock really valued their friendship.


Seven months in to their friendship, Jim decides that it's time to try some different activities with his best friend. They did do other things besides play chess. Yet all of these were things that they did at either Jim's dorm room or Spock's apartment.

Jim lost count of how many times he fell asleep on Spock's bed after watching some very old movie. His favorite thing was to watch old earth SCI Fi films with Spock pointing out all the inaccuracies. Okay, if he was honest with himself waking up with Spock was his favorite part of that particular activity.

"I know we usually do things that just involve the two of us, but I really want you to come. I know Vulcans don't dance or party, but you could still come. We can just sit in a corner and hang out as all the jealous girls look at us. It will be fun." Jim said grabbing Spock's hand.

Even after all this time he still got that electric tingling sensation every time Spock touched him. He thought it was just residual feelings from his earlier crush. He knew Spock didn't date and there was no way he was doing anything that would screw up his friendship with him.

"I do not see the logic in us going to a party when we will do the exact same thing there that we will do here." Spock said to him. Jim notice that he never let go of his hand. Actually, he was starting to stroke Jim's fingers with his thumb. This was making that tingling feeling worse and parts of his anatomy come to life.

"It may not seem very logical, but Bones thinks you're imaginary. According to Bones the only reason why he hasn't sent me in for a psyc consultation is your existence has dramatically reduce the probability of me contracting an STI." With him spending so much time was Spock he did not exactly have time for his previous "sleep with anything that walks" behavior. Also two months into their friendship Jim may have flirted with Spock's neighbor and Spock may have growled at her.

"I just want to do something different tonight. Besides you're probably not going to be speaking to me after I destroy your test tomorrow."

"I sincerely doubt that since you are not going to be able to beat the test."

"I'm so going to destroy your test tomorrow." Basically he bribed a fellow student with several dates with his doctor friend in exchange for inserting a new subroutine into the test. He needs to figure out how to tell Bones that he's dating Gaila for the next week. Before his friendship with Spock he probably would've just slept with her himself, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to do it.

He still ended up underneath Gaila's bed this afternoon. They were working on the plan when Gaila's roommate showed up. In case the plan when badly he really didn't want anyone finding him in Gaila's dorm room. Fortunately for him Uhura just assumed he was another one of Gaila's casual hookups. Some casual flirting kept her from discovering his real purpose.

"That remains to be seen. I do not feel comfortable going out, but I am not averse to you staying here. Unless you rather go to the party by yourself."

"I rather be here with you." That's when the last thing he expected ever to happen happened. He felt a hot Vulcan mouth completely devour his in a planet-shattering kiss that had him falling back onto the couch taking Spock with him.

"I thought you just wanted to be my friend." It was the first thing out of his mouth as his brain started functioning again.

"We are friends. I may have neglected to mention that the Vulcan equivalent to the word friend can also mean lover in standard." That was the last thing Jim comprehended as he felt slim fingers undo the fly of his blue jeans.


The next morning he woke up completely naked in Spock's bed with an equally naked Spock wrapped around him. He looked over at the clock and realized that he had exactly 15 minutes to get ready if he wanted to arrive on time to take the test. He felt a strong arm push him back down onto the bed.

"You will call Cadet Gaila and let her know that you will not be using her services today." Spock said as he kiss to shoulder.

"How do you know what I was planning?"

"It is amazing what one will let slip during orgasm. You will also be taking the test 3 hours later then originally scheduled. I would suggest not taking the test again, but I know you too well. However, I am prepared to console you after you fell again." He heard Spock say as he placed another hot kiss on his neck.

"That's fine. I already won. I already beat your ultimate no win scenario."

"How so?"

"I got you to be my boyfriend."

"Indeed" Spock said as he kissed him again. They were so wrapped up in each other that Jim kind of forgot to tell Gaila not to plant the subroutine. However, that is an entirely different story.

The end


If I get enough response and I find the right song there is always a possibility that I will do a follow-up story.