Title: Save me
Pairings: Lucky Cannon/Cody
Disclaimer: Not mine
Notes: Well, I'm glad you seem to enjoy this. This chapter is Cody's POV. It takes place the same night that the other chapter ended, with Cody running off.
Keep in mind that Cody's been drinking in his chapter. This most assuredly not the last you'll see of prick!Cody
Bleary, red rimmed eyes glanced from the shot of rum he'd been staring into for the past thirty minutes, to look at the bartender. He caught his reflection in the liquor cabinet. Blue eyes were dull and lackluster. The dark circles underneath his eyes foretold that he wasn't sleeping. Olive complexion was pale underneath the dim, unforgiving lights of the bar. He supposed, no, he wasn't alright. He hadn't been in months. "I'm fine."
"You've been sitting here for three hours. It's almost closing time."
Cody glanced behind him at the empty seats. A few graveyard shift workers were straightening the tables and chairs, sweeping up the messes, cleaning the tops. He was alone. But that was like usual. He'd gotten used to becoming a lone wolf. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize how late it was." The clock above the bar read ten minutes to three.
She waved him aside with her hand, "Don't worry about it. You want me to call you a cab?"
I'd like you to call my ex. I want to hear his voice. I want to tell him that I still love him. Cody sighed, throwing down a wad of money, not even bothering to count. "I'm staying a block away. Thanks."
The warm, June breeze blew past him, ruffling his hair. Once, he might have stood there with his eyes closed and savored the feeling. But not anymore. Not when he no longer cared.
He could have blamed Randy. After all, Randy had been the one to string him along with false promises only to dump him the second John Cena was a free agent. But Cody blamed himself too. He'd been innocent. Gullible. Taken in by the fact that the Randy Orton was paying attention to him; the young rookie of RAW. He'd been foolish to trust Randy. He'd been foolish to fall in love with him too.
There were times, in the middle of the night, after too many shots, that he'd dial Randy's number. Randy had to have known it was him despite that he always blocked his number first. Cody would listen to Randy breathe. And when the dial tone rang in his ears, he'd masturbate to the memories. Maybe he was obsessed. Maybe his heart hadn't healed yet. Maybe it never would…
He should hate Randy.
Randy hadn't been the most loving partner. In fact, Cody was damn positive that Randy hadn't cared about him. At all. Cody had been sex. A way to satisfy himself while John Cena was busy with his newest fuck bunny. It had went on a year. Despite the physical abuse. Despite the mental degradation. Cody kept returning for more. Was he a masochist for putting himself through it?
He was so goddamned messed up.
And he was doing the same fucking thing to Lucky that Randy had done to him.
It was wrong. He knew it. He was using Lucky for sex. Lucky was just another a hole. A fuck for him. He was being unfair. He was hurting the younger man. It was easy to see. The way those soulful eyes met his from across the arena or across catering or-
The light was streaming from underneath room 209.
This wasn't his room.
He could faintly hear the television on, could hear that voice that sounded so sinful during their love making. Cody sighed. It wasn't love making. It was practically rape. And the insults that Cody hurled at Lucky. The implying that Lucky was a whore. Yet Lucky kept returning to him, kept begging for more. Kept trying to get inside of Cody's head. It was different to have someone so willing to take care of him, to fight for him. Randy had thrown him out with the garbage.
His hand was trembling as he knocked.
"I swear to God, Mike, I don't want to go with you!" The door was flung open viciously, Lucky's eyes widening as he saw Cody. "What are you doing here? Are you okay?"
The concern was strange… Cody wasn't accustomed to someone other than his father and Ted giving a damn about him. "I'm… I'm lost," he whispered, feeling the alcohol coursing through his blood, breaking the dam on his emotions.
"Cody, you're drunk. Go back to your room and sleep it off." "Don't you dare patronize me!" Cody snapped, blue eyes narrowing in fury, "I came here because I need someone! You keep preaching that you want to save me, that you want to be there. Why are you turning me away when I need you to-"
Lips were crushed against his, a hot tongue licking across his bottom lip, entreating entrance. Insistent and forceful, their tongues waged war, stroking. The kiss was awkward, messy, saliva trickling down his chin but Cody was drowning in the sensations. It had been so long since he'd last been kissed with such passion. Since he'd last been desired. And this beautiful man was attracted to not just his physical features but to him. And that was more than he could ever say for Randy Orton.
"At least that's one way to shut you up," Lucky murmured, laughing, tickling Cody's face with his breath.
"I… We can't do this," Cody's head was pounding and his pulse was palpitating rapidly. Sweat was beading on his forehead. "I hate you. That when I look at you, I'm reminded of everything I hate about myself. I used to be like you. I used to be optimistic and I used to see the best in people. But I had my heart destroyed by someone I wanted to save from his demons. Do you know what's it like to have someone rip your soul out of your body and spit on it?"
Cody couldn't hear him, Lucky's voice falling on deaf ears.
Cody glances up from the New Avengers comic he's reading, "What?"
Randy rolls his eyes, "Come on, you didn't seriously think that I'd stay with you once John dumped that little slut he's been banging?" Cody frowns, "Fuck. You did. Cody, you didn't know? I don't give a fuck about you. You were sex. Good sex, if that's any consolation."
"You're going back to John?" his voice is small, his heart aching in his chest.
"Look, it's been fun. You kept me entertained and kept my dick happy. But I don't love you. I played you, man. But it's okay. You won't have to be around us. I've got you set up to go to Smackdown at the Draft."
"Smackdown! But what about Ted and-" Cody's on his feet, hating the traitorous tears that are pooling in his eyes. "Randy, I can't believe you did this!"
Randy chuckles, "You think I want you tagging around on RAW? I don't want you interrupting me and John."
"I mean nothing to you?"
"Nope," Randy shrugs, "Sorry, kid. Well, see you around."
Cody stands there, his comic falling to the floor, his hands numb. The tears are coursing his cheeks but he's too paralyzed with shock and hurt to move.
Two nights later, he's heading to his first Smackdown appearance.
Two nights later, he's sobbing into his pillow.
He was just another notch on Randy's belt. Another man in a long string of men and women that Randy had fucked and left. Always for John Cena. But who was the pathetic one when Randy longed for a love from a man that clearly didn't return it? Cody was making Lucky pay for his own mistakes. "Do you have any idea what it's like to love someone that hates you? That forced you into a situation that was against you? I had to leave my friends because Randy Orton didn't want his loser ex on the same show as him. And now I'm a joke. I've lost all my fans."
"No you haven't. You still have one," Lucky smiled wanly. "Me."
"We can't be together. We're too different. You're still… You aren't touched by this business like I am. I don't want you getting involved with me and becoming just as jaded as I am. Lucky, you have the entire world in front of you. Don't be taken in by petty promises and lies. I'm not good for your career."
"I think I should be the one to decide that."
"Just…. Stay away from me, Lucky. You'll thank me later."
He closed the door behind him, hearing Lucky call his name.
He hoped he forgot this in the morning, that the booze would aid him in not remembering. Because it was easier to see Lucky as just another piece of ass. And not as a person that had feelings. It was easier to mimic Randy and be a bastard.
But a part of him didn't want Lucky to listen to him.
The same part that was desperate for love.