Author's Note:

I never realized there was holes punched in saltine crackers.

Let's see if I remember how to do this.

You're Such an Uke.

"Oi. Dame Tsuna. You only have five minutes to get to class." A baby wearing a black fedora said to his brown haired teenaged student, which he woke up with a kick to the side of the head fifteen minutes ago. The resultant Hieee and scrambling from his now wide-awake student made the baby smirk. The baby left the room and hopped down the stairs while his student literally fell down the stairs.

"Ita ta ta… Reborn! Why didn't you tell me to get ready sooner?" Tsuna asked his little baby tutor with teary eyes while pushing himself off the floor.

"I woke you up earlier but you fell back asleep. So I woke you up again and you just sat there staring at nothing for ten minutes." The baby answered while walking into the kitchen, still smirking, to eat some of Maman's delicious food. "You're going to be late dame Tsuna." Tsuna's eyes widened as he rushed into the kitchen to grab some toast to have at least something to eat, almost tripped over a chair leg, almost fell over himself when he went to grab his bento from his mom, and made it to the door, all the while thinking how unfair it was that he wouldn't be able to eat delicious food because of a sadistic tutor keeping him up studying and then waking him up too early. He wished he had someone to save him from this nightmare. Not that he was a damsel in distress. Damsel no, distress yes.

"You're such an uke, dame Tsuna." Was the last thing he heard before the door closed behind him. 'Uke? What does that mean?' He thought as he rushed passed his gate.

"Yo! Tsuna." A cheery voice from right next to him greeted, almost making him drop everything he was holding out of fright.

"Ah Yamamoto." His friend just smiled at him and started speed walking cheerily along with him. He ate his toast as fast as possible and missed it when it was gone. He then looked over at Yamamoto 'How does he not worry about being late? If Hibari-san sees us after the bell rings… Hiiiiiiiieeee.'

"You okay Tsuna?" He heard a hint of worry in his friend's voice.

"Ah! I'm fine Yamamoto. Just don't want to be late. Ano, where's Gokudera-kun?" He wondered why it was so quiet and realized after a minute his silver-haired self-proclaimed right-hand man wasn't around yelling at Yamamoto for being a baseball idiot.

"I don't know. Maybe he isn't feeling well. Ha ha." 'Eeee I hope Bianchi hasn't gone to visit Gokudera-kun. And how is Yamamoto so cheerful?' He thought, still not understanding the baseball enigma. Tsuna glanced at his watch and saw that they had two minutes before the bell rang and the gates of the school closed. He picked up his pace even more almost jogging. Yamamoto didn't mind. The word that Reborn called him as he was leaving this morning popped into his head and for some reason he felt like he should ask someone.

"Ano, Yamamoto? What does uke mean?" He saw Yamamoto stop and looked at him. They were standing right outside the gate and he was getting a little antsy about just standing there but he was curious as to why Yamamoto stopped. Yamamoto then smiled brightly at him, making him blink in surprise.

"Tsuna does know about baseball."


"It's a term for catcher, although it isn't used that much today. Seme means pitcher."

"Oh." Why would Reborn call him a catcher when he didn't even play baseball? There were a few stragglers running passed him and he glanced at his watch to see they had thirty seconds to get to class. Before he could freak out Yamamoto placed both his hands on his shoulders and looked at him with a pleasant smile.

"I'll be your Seme if you'll be my Uke. Ne Tsuna?" He blinked up at Yamamoto. What do you say to that? He heard some girls gasp and looked at his watch again. Fifteen seconds.

"Hiiiiieee Yamamoto! We're gonna be late!" He grabbed his friend's hand and ran into the school courtyard, threw his shoes off, put his slippers on, ran up the stairs, and opened the door a few seconds after the school bell rang. And thank that is holy and unholy because the teacher wasn't there yet. Tsuna collapsed in his seat while Yamamoto laughed and went to his own.

- Recess Break -

After finally getting through two classes, I could finally get a break. I hated taking notes. I was tempted to eat my bento but then I'd be starving by the end of school. Yamamoto came over and sat in the vacated seat to the left of me, closer to the window.

"Want some Tsuna?" Yamamoto held out some tamago and my stomach rumbled. Yamamoto chuckled. I blushed and took some. Yamamoto started going on about baseball and I nodded politely but looked around the room. I jolted when I noticed a group of girls glaring heatedly at me. 'Hiiiieeee what did I do?' I quickly looked away but could still feel the glares stabbing into me. I saw some other girls glaring at the ones glaring at me and when they saw me looking, gave me thumbs up or winks. Now I was totally confused.

"Get out of the way you stupid girls!" Cue sighing or giggling from said girls as Gokudera made his way over to Yamamoto and me.

"Gokudera-kun!" When he heard me his face lit up like a puppy's making me sweat drop.

"Juudaime! I'm so sorry I couldn't escort Juudaime to school this morning." He got down on his knees and bowed. I flailed and sputtered, embarrassed at this even though I should be used to it from him.

"That's alright Gokudera-kun. Please get up." He quickly stood up.

"Of course Juudaime." He then took the seat to the right of me.

"Haha. We thought you were sick. And don't worry, I escorted Tsuna to school this morning." Oh no. Gokudera's gonna explode. He jumped out of his seat already.

"You stupid baseball idiot! If what I had to do this morning weren't so important I would've shown up. I barely trust you to get Juudaime to school! I should just get rid of you now to make my life a little better!" Gokudera pulled out his dynamite and went to light a cigarette but I grabbed his arm before he could. I looked up at him.

"Please Gokudera-kun sit down." For some reason Gokudera blushed but put his dynamite away, but before he sat, he pointed at Yamamoto.

"You're lucky Juudaime is so nice to let an idiot like you stick around." Yamamoto just laughed while I sweat dropped. Gokudera finally sat down and almost looked like he was pouting. The bell rang to signal recess over.

- Lunch Break -

They decided to stay indoors to eat because it was too windy to eat up on the roof. Tsuna happily ate his bento while Yamamoto offered some of his lunch to Gokudera. Gokudera just growled about stupid idiots and went to go buy some food. If Tsuna weren't so hungry he'd offer to Gokudera too but eating that tamago for a snack earlier made him hungrier. By the time Gokudera came back he was already half finished with his bento. They were sitting the same way they were during recess.

"Ne Gokudera, did you know Tsuna knew about baseball?" Yamamoto asked once they were all finished eating. Tsuna was kind of zoned out.

"What the hell are you talking about Idiot?" Gokudera wouldn't be surprised if the idiot just said that because Juudaime said something that the idiot probably already said.

"Tsuna asked me about an old term used for catcher. I asked him if I could be the pitcher to his catcher. Well I asked if I could be the seme to his uke. Haha. He never answered though. Ne Tsuna?" Tsuna blinked back to the conversation and looked back and forth between the smiling Yamamoto and the darkening Gokudera. He realized he probably should've been paying more attention to the conversation because he wasn't sure he could deter Gokudera from blowing something up. Gokudera suddenly stood up and slammed his hands on Tsuna's desk.

"The hell idiot!" He ground out, everyone looking in their direction. "You'd hurt Juudaime!" Yamamoto gave a look of confusion but Tsuna's eyes widened in realization. Whenever Yamamoto gets his hands on a bat or a baseball he goes into baseball mode and becomes a pro but because of that anyone who isn't on par with him gets hurt. "You'd be way to rough. Who knows how bad you'd hurt Juudaime. I won't allow it! Besides, I'd made a better Seme for Juudaime than you ever would!" Yamamoto scratched the back of his head laughing but other than that everyone was deathly silent. Everyone was staring at them, some in confusion (mostly guys, one or two girls), others in denial and horror (a mixture of girls and guys but mostly girls), and others with scary happy faces (mostly girls with one guy). Gokudera stood straight up and looked over at everyone staring. "What the hell are you all looking at?" That jolted everyone making a lot of people look away or get into groups and sob/squeal. Tsuna thought he heard some of the girls sob out 'Not Gokudera-kun too!' A random thought that popped into Tsuna's head was 'Why were there so many people in their classroom?'

"What is with all the crowding and the noise?" A deep voice said calmly. The room went deathly silent but with a reason that Tsuna knew about. Hibari-san walked through the door of the classroom. Those not frozen (which was quite a few) ran for their lives, others that noticed that the bell was going to ring and were supposed to be in this classroom tried to not catch the eye of the head of the disciplinary committee. Hibari heard sniffling and looked at a girl sitting in one of the front seats. He strolled over to her and stood there until she looked up at him. "Why are you crying herbivore?" She gave a muffled squeak but swallowed and knew she had to answer honestly. Even thought Hibari-san never hurt a girl she didn't want to prove it wrong.

"Gokudera-san said he's make a better Seme for Tsunayoshi-san, then Yamamoto-san would. And Yamamoto wanted Tsunayoshi-san to be his Uke." She said it hoarsely so it was hard to hear her even with the room silent as it is. Hibari heard her clearly and looked at the three mentioned with narrowed eyes. Gokudera scowled at the prefect, Yamamoto just smiled nervously, while Tsuna was trying to sink into his chair. Tsuna stopped the urge to squeak as Hibari-san walked over to them. He towered over Tsuna and looked at him with a weird glint in his eyes.

"So you're an Uke Sawada, Tsunayoshi?"

"Reborn called me that this morning." Tsuna stuttered out. He didn't like the way Hibari-san was looking at him.

"Why would the kid call you a catcher?" Yamamoto asked confused. Tsuna was glad he wasn't the only one who didn't get why Reborn called him that.

"Catcher?" Hibari raised an eyebrow at that but then he smiled understanding the situation. "I don't think that was what the baby meant when he called you that Sawada, Tsunayoshi." Tsuna gave a look of confusion, along with Yamamoto but then was surprised when Hibari grabbed his arm and pulled him out of his seat.

"Come with me herbivore."


"Let Juudaime go! You bastard!" Before Gokudera could pull out any dynamite, he was k. by a tonfa.

"Gokudera-kun!" Before Tsuna could go help his friend, Hibari started dragging him backwards out of the classroom. The teacher walked in the classroom as Hibari was dragging Tsuna out.

"Hibari-san, Wha-" Before the teacher could finish the question Hibari cut him off.

"I'm going to show Sawada, Tsunayoshi the true meaning of being an Uke." Then proceeded to drag Tsuna all the way to the reception room, making sure none of his subordinates would bother him and his prey.

Back in Tsuna's classroom a few girls sobbed out "Not Hibari-san too!"


Tsuna walked out of the school and saw his two friends waiting for him. Gokudera looked at his Juudaime and was ready to kill that bastard Hibari. Tsuna's clothes were wrinkled, a button was missing from his shirt, his hair was terribly ruffled more so than usual, there was a small red stain on his shoulder that looked like fresh blood, and for some reason he was limping.

"Juudaime! Where are you hurt? What did that bastard do to you? I'm gonna kill him!"

"Calm down Gokudera. He didn't do… too much to me." Tsuna was blushing horribly but he just wanted to go home. "Can we just go home now? Please." Gokudera looked hesitant but nodded while Yamamoto looked on a little worried but just let it go.

"So Tsuna? What is the real meaning of being an Uke? And can you be mine?"


Oneshot? Should I try to write what went on with Hibari and Tsuna? Just a warning, I'm horrible about finishing a story once I start it.