Liz wiped at the tears streaming down her face. She closed her journal and put it inside the packaging. She stepped out of her car into the crowded postal office and dropped it off to be shipped to her father. She hated lying to him. She wasn't happy and she wasn't married to Max. But she knew that her life in her journal had been leading there. It was easier to lie than to ever admit to her father how she'd thrown her life away for Max Evans.
On her way home, she struggled with herself. She wanted her father not to worry over her. Jim had called and spoken to Kyle, Michael and her. He'd admitted her parents didn't look so good and weren't getting better. She'd been debating writing to them but Michael had convinced her otherwise, that was unlit last night.
Michael was outside as soon as her car pulled into the driveway of the shabby two bedroom home they were renting.
She could see he was mad, but he stopped in is tracks and his face softened when he glimpsed her red, flushed face.
"What's wrong? Why were you crying?" He was truly worried.
She gave him a small smile. "I sent it," and her voice broke. Her tears started up again and her chest started to hurt.
He would be mad later but right now, he knew she needed him. He met her by her car door and hugged her, letting her cry.
Minutes later, she stepped back. "I'm sorry. I'm better now. Really. Let's go inside."
He waited until they were both sitting on the living room before he said anything. "Liz, did you really have to send it? If you wanted your parents to be ok, why not just call them. Ease their fear."
"They'd have questions, Michael. I can't lie to them. I'd start crying or my voice would crack. They'd know something was wrong. I don't want them to know I screwed things up. I should have left Max long ago. I've let him overrule my life. And for what? He's stuck in the past. He's more controlling and selfish than ever. Maria was lucky to leave when she did."
Michael wasn't stung or hurt by the mention of Maria's name. They had departed as friends and nothing more. She'd wanted to start a life.
Max threw tantrums worse now. Although he'd promised he was no king, he'd filled the role and not well.
"You can still leave." Michael reminded her but his throat burned even suggesting it.
Liz let out one small humorless laugh. "He's too consumed by me. He'd hunt me down. Besides, leaving you, Isabel and Kyle would kill me. You guys are my family now. I love you so much and you're all I have left. I can't go back to Roswell and I don't know where Maria is."
"So you're stuck?" Michael tried to tease.
"Exactly." She gave a small smile but it died almost immediately. "I can't leave you guys."
"Liz, we'd be fine." He could see how close she was already and it killed him to convince her to leave. "Isabel and Kyle have enough money to make a life for themselves but they don't want to leave you. They're waiting for you."
Liz knew this and it made staying worse because she was holding them back. Her eyes were full of tears again. "I can't leave you, Michael." Her voice full of anguish.
He held her gaze. He knew how she felt. He took her in his arms and squeezed. He couldn't do this. He couldn't-wouldn't hold her back like Max had for so long. Liz deserved a life away from all the alien drama. She was too smart and ambitious to stick around. And he couldn't leave with her. If he were around, she'd still be in danger from the alien hunters and Max would certainly hunt them down.
Michael pulled back to look at Liz, "I can't go, Liz." He loved her, more than he'd loved Maria.
He hadn't told her, hadn't told anyone. But no matter how awful Max was, he couldn't hurt him like that. Liz was off limits.
Liz nodded. She hated this. Hated not being able to tell Michael how much she loved him. She wouldn't do that to him or put him in that situation.
It was getting harder to stay, to breathe with Max around. The walls were coming in.
"Isabel and Kyle will be home soon, why don't we start dinner." Liz got up wiping away her tears.
Michael nodded. "What're we making."
"Don't know. Lets look in the kitchen."
This part was easy for them. They danced around the small kitchen, never bumping into each other, always staying close and helping each other.
When they first had gone on the road, Michael had taught Liz a couple of things in the kitchen and they even watched cooking shows together taking notes. Both had different cooking style but they took turns. Today was Liz's.
"Don't you touch my sauce!" Liz warned when she ran out of the kitchen to go to the bathroom. She tasted it when she was back just to check if he had.
"I didn't touch it." Michael told her a little irritated.
"I was just checking."
"You said not to touch it so I didn't." He defended himself.
"You never listen when I say that." She argued.
"I didn't touch the damn sauce." He didn't disagree with her last statement.
"I know that now."
"Will you guys stop arguing." Isabel walked into the kitchen with Kyle right behind her. "I'm tired and cranky."
"when aren't you cranky." Michael said softly under his breath.
"So, what's for dinner?" Kyle asked quickly.
"Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo." Liz smiled. "The garlic bread is in the oven. It should be done in a little bit."
"GO ahead and go get ready." Michael encouraged.
"Yea get out of your work clothes." Liz went to get the plates.
"Oh we're getting out of our clothes alright." Kyle winked.
"Valenti." Michael hated when Kyle joked like that.
"C'mon honey. Leave Michael alone." Isabel pulled her husband.
Kyle winked at him before disappearing out of the kitchen.
Michael rolled his eyes.
"Help me with these, Guerin." Liz called.
Michael helped her set the table. By the time they were putting the food on the table, Isabel and Kyle were coming back in.
"Max here yet?" Isabel sat on her normal seat next to Kyle.
"He called and said he'd be a little late." Michael answered her.
Nobody said anything but they were all a little happy with the news. When Max was late to dinner the room wasn't tense. They had a good time, laughed and talked with ease.
Today was no different. They ate in peace and asked about each others day. They took their time eating and chit chatting.
Max came in almost an hour later. Isabel greeted him while the rest mumbled a hello.
He walked straight to Liz and she tensed. She flinched when he kissed the top of her head. "Hello, Liz."
Michael bit his tongue. He resisted jumping over the table hit Max.
"Max." Liz warned.
"What?" Max sat and grabbed the bowl with the food to serve himself.
"Don't." Liz hated this. He made her feel so gross.
"Don't what?" He smiled but looked confused.
Max scared her when he acted like this. Acted like he didn't know what she meant. Acted like they hadn't broken up months ago.
"I asked you not to do that any more." She was calm but her voice broke with unease."
Max shook his head. "Don't be silly, Liz. I love you. But we can talk about it later. I have to go back to work in a couple hours. I'm working the night shift today, so I'm gonna catch a few hours of sleep before I leave." That was the last of that because he began to eat.
The next couple of hours dragged for Liz. She was fearful when Max was around.
Before Max left, he searched for Liz to say goodbye but she conveniently was in the bathroom with Michael outside "waiting" for his turn. Max said goodbye through the door.
When Liz came out her and Michael looked at each other.
"Liz, this is getting ridiculous. You can't keep doing this hun. You want me to talk to him?"
Liz laughed at the idea. "Yea, right." She shook her head. "I can handle it, Michael."
Michael's jaw clenched. "I don't want you to HANDLE it. I want him to stop."
She shrugged and walked into the living room.
Kyle came out of the kitchen. "Hey, Lizzie. Do you and Michael want to go to the movies with us? Isabel is getting ready."
"Um, no thanks. I just wanna hang out here tonight."
"C'mon Liz. It's Friday night. We're going bowling after. It'll be fun."
"You guys go. Michael, you wanna go with them?" She turned to him.
"Nah. I'll stick around. Don't like feeling like the 3rd wheel."
Isabel walked in then.
"Suit yourself." Kyle gestured to Isabel as he opened the front door. "Come on, love. They wanna stay home."
Isabel nodded. "Call us if you need anything. Night." She hesitated at the door and turned to Liz. "I'm sorry about earlier."
Liz shook her head. Another thing she hated was when Isabel apologize for her brother. It wasn't her fault. "No worries, Iz."
Isabel smiled and nodded. She would never understand how Liz was still so sweet or why she stuck around. She was glad she did. She was good for her brother. Michael had never been happier or so in love. It tore her apart that they wouldn't admit it to each other. Kyle was right, it was their choice and it would make Max insane. But still, Michael and Liz deserved to be happy too. Would Max ever change? She always hoped so.
"Dinner was great, Liz." Michael said after the Valenti's were gone.
"Thanks for the help, Michael."
When he sat on the couch, she snuggled next to him and laid her head on his shoulder. He instantly wrapped his arm around her.
She could tell he was still angry about Max. "Stop thinking about it!" She snapped.
"How can you STOP?"
She turned her head to look up at him. "Please, Michael. Let it go." She begged.
It was torture for Michael to look down at Liz's sweet face inches from him. "Liz," he had to force her to see how incredibly ridiculous the whole situation was.
"No. I don't want to talk about it. I just want to enjoy this. I'm safe now. I'm safe with you. I'm happy with you. I," and she stopped, knowing she couldn't continue or she'd say too much.
He wanted so much to tell her that he loved her. "I won't hurt you, Liz."
He kissed her nose then. He didn't know why and as soon as he'd done it, he knew he'd crossed the line.
They always hugged. Always kissed each other. But this kiss was different and they could feel it. But it was Liz who reached up and lightly kissed his lips. It was her hands that pulled his face closer. It was her who got on her knees and took control of the kiss.
It took him a minute to understand what was going on. When he did, something in the back of his mind told him not to do it, that it was a bad idea. But the back of his mind wasn't working. All the pent up sexual tension, all the desire he'd felt for the past 2 years was release and he hungrily kissed Liz back. He'd never tasted anything so sweet.
Neither one wanted to stop. Neither realized when Michael lifted Liz up and laid her on the couch and laid on top of her. Both hands wandered over the bodies. They teased and sucked. Micheal groaned as Liz ran her nails over his back.
Shirts were the first to go followed by her bra. Michael was awed but his need pushed him to the brink and he kissed, suckled and bit her nipples. Liz moaned in pleasure.
The managed to take off their pants and underwear.
Michael reached for her and found her exactly how he wanted her. She was so wet for him. But it didn't stop him from playing with her. He forced his mouth away from hers and he made his way to her entrance and kissed her there. He licked once and Liz grabbed and pushed his head down. He licked and sucked for only a few seconds before Liz was pulling him back up.
"Michael." She groaned and they both knew what she wanted.
Michael kissed her and pushed himself into her. Shock crossed his face when he felt her tear.
Liz moaned into his shoulder and bit it from the pain and the pleasure.
Before Michael could stop or ask, Liz was already moving around his cock and he moaned in pleasure.
He forgot his hesitation and started to pump in and out of Liz. She in turn matched him. She'd never known this pleasure.
Looking up at Michael was almost too much. She didn't want to think of what they were doing. She only wanted to feel. She deserved this. Didn't she?
Michael had never felt truly complete until now. Liz molded around him, almost as if she was made just for him. He knew was close. He bit into Liz's bottom lip. "Oh, fuck. Liz, I'm so fucken close. Come with me, baby."
Liz squeezed his cock with her walls and she felt it twitch inside her. "AH!" She said in ecstasy.
"Fuck, Liz. You feel so good. Oh, Fuck." Michael knew he was losing control.
"Yes, Michael!" She encouraged when he pumped faster into her.
He went deeper and harder. He knew she'd be soar later but he also knew they were too close to slow down.
He grunted as he came and she screamed out to him.
They lay there for a long while, simply holding each other.
And as his heart rate decreased, Michael's brain started working and he wanted to kill himself for what he'd done.
"You were a virgin." His tone dead panned.
Liz's heart dropped. "Yes."
"Jeezus, Liz." Michael got a hold of himself and pulled himself up to put his pants back on.
Liz held her tears back. She sat up and put her pants on, followed by her shirt.
"FUCK." He pinched the bridge of his nose and turned away from her.
If he'd known, he would have done things differently.
"All this time? You were with Max for how long? How is that even possible?"
She didn't want to think of Max right now. "We never went past 3rd base and when he wanted to, my brain was finally turning on and didn't want anything to do with him."
"This was wrong, Liz." Wrong because he'd promised himself never to go this far with her. Never to do this to Max. Never to put Liz in this situation. Micheal was never as happy and never so angry at himself.
Liz chocked back her tears and pain. She understood he didn't feel the love she felt. It was her who initiated everything. He hadn't slept with anyone for over a year that she knew. Of course he was horny.
"Don't worry, Michael. We both needed an outlet. We were both mad and frustrated. It won't happen again. I know it meant nothing." She tunrned away because he was looking at her again with the strangest look in his eyes. "I'm gonna go hop in the shower."
Michael bit his tongue. His heart shattered as he heard her speak. He had to get himself together before everyone came home. "Sure. I'm gonna go out for a walk. Take your time."
She nodded and headed toward the bathroom. She waited until she heard the front door close before she let the tears come.
Faintly she heard her cell phone ring.
She didn't hide her tears when she answered because she saw who was calling. "Ava?"
"Aw sweets. What's wrong? What happened?" Ava and Liz had been in contact for the past 2 years and regularly called each other.
"I-I can't be here anymore. It's too much, Ava."
"What is sweets? Is it Max? What did he do now?"
"Not, Max. Mi-Michael. I won't be able to look at him." The thought of him coming back and seeing him knowing he regretted what just happened was too much.
"Liz, you know you always have a room at my place. We've talked about this. Maybe you can come for the weekend. Stay and decide what you want to do."
It only took her 2 seconds to decide. "I'll see you in a couple of hours." Liz hung up her phone and raced to her room, grabbing her essentials and threw them in her suitcase. She was done within half an hour.
She wrote a note for Kyle and Isabel and one for Michael. She placed those in Isabel and Kyle's room and left a brief note on the coffee table for everyone so Max would know she left and was not taken.
Hysterically crying she didn't look back as she drove away from the house.