Disclaimer and Authors Notes: J. K. Rowling owns all of the characters in this piece of nonsense, but because she has not been using them recently I thought that I would take them out to play for a short while. Oh . . . and although it is based in the winter of Harry's seventh year it pays little regard to canon.
Is there really a game called Dementors?
"Daphne, what are you lot up to?" Asked Harry Potter's favourite bookworm; she was sat in the library, conscientiously studying for a test which was coming up in three weeks time.
The tall, blond, Slytherin witch was surrounded by over two dozen other witches from all of the other houses and she replied evasively, "Well . . . because of the awful weather, the headmistress has given us permission to organise some indoor entertainment and we were going to play a game of Dementors."
"Is there really a game called Dementors? How come I've never heard of it?" The rather doubtful Gryffindor Head Girl queried.
"Well of course you would never have heard of it, we have only just invented it." Susan Bones replied happily.
"So how does the game work then?" Hermione had had dealings with most of these witches before, on more than one occasion, so she was quite justifiably suspicious of just what they were all up to.
"Well we are going to pick a perfectly random boy, then hold him down and try to suck his soul out." Parvati was trying to sound innocent and she was not really succeeding all that well.
"So how did you go about choosing this perfectly random boy then?" The book-witch obviously still didn't trust any of them.
Padma Patil was keen to explain, "Well, we each wrote one name on a piece of paper and we put all of the pieces of paper into a hat and drew one out. So that is how we determined which boy that we are going to sno . . . achemm . . . try to suck the soul from."
"So where's the hat then?" Hermione asked casually.
In this instant Romilda Vane proved that, apart from anything else, she wasn't too bright, "Here it is." She said picking it up and handing it to the Head Girl.
Daphne tried to intercept it but Hermione was too quick for her and she inverted the hat over the table she was using; having quickly checked about a dozen names written on the pile of papers from the hat the totally unsurprised witch said, "All of these have Harry Potter written on them, didn't you have a rule excluding boys who are in relationships?"
"When it comes to sucking souls Dementors don't normally seem to exclude anybody." Hannah Abbott said somewhat belligerently for a Hufflepuff.
"Anyway it can't be very much of a relationship, you're always stuck in here studying and I have it on good authority that Harry is lounging around in the common room looking bored to death. You have a wonderful boyfriend and if you're not very careful you will lose him to someone who is prepared to give him a reasonable proportion of her time." Melinda Bobbin let Hermione have it, both barrels.
"But Harry likes to go flying." Hermione was desperately clutching at straws.
With an exasperated sigh Tracy Davies looked at the book obsessed witch as if she was insane, "Because you have a book stuck to your face all of the time it may have escaped your notice; but the temperature hasn't been above freezing for the last two months; it has been snowing, off and on, for the last ten days and the current blizzard has been going almost continuously for the past three days.
"Now, much the same as you, I really don't like flying on broomsticks at all; however, I believe that these are not exactly what even the most obsessed aficionado of the pastime would call, 'preferred flying conditions'."
The obsessive girl was nearly in tears as she quickly packed away all of her study material and after thanking all the girls she quickly made her way out of the library to find Harry and spend some . . . a lot of quality time with him.
Appearing from behind the book racks the Headmistress asked, "Miss Greengrass, what was that all about?"
"Harry needs her and we were just trying to save the most important relationship in the school Professor." Daphne replied.
"Very well done indeed." The Headmistress said as she departed.
A few minutes later Hermione entered the Gryffindor common room, seeing Harry sat alone she went and threw herself onto his lap and then she proceeded to kiss her green eyed boyfriend very seriously.
When they surfaced he asked, "Not that I am objecting in any way, but, what was that for?"
"Well," she started nervously, "I have just had it pointed out to me, rather forcefully, that I have been ignoring you recently; so how about we go up to our Head Student suite and you allowing me to carry on apologising."
Without saying a word, he smiled as he stood up with her and taking her hand they departed the common room.