I recall this not-so-distant past as if it was a once-upon-a-time memory of a lost youth. I can still see you. Your golden hair flowing back, pushed aside your beautiful, tanned, hearth shaped face by a fierce wind. Which was still nowhere near as strong as your temperament. A vivacity like no other showed by a never-tamed light in your hazelnut, lamb-like eyes. I can still hear you singing to the sky under the rain, dancing.
People used to say you weren't normal. But they didn't know you. You were so innocent and you listened to your hearth instead of your mind. And this is what made you special, better than all the others. But it also brought your downfall. A stupid one, may I add.
We were walking back home when it started to rain. You used to say it was the clouds crying on every innocent child's grave. And that the only way to bring back their smile was to dance. So that's what you did. Like always. And I watched you turn around, laughing. And when you skidded toward the road, the light was green, I followed you. I didn't pay much attention.
I was living the best moment of my life. What could go wrong?
You never saw the car, did you? Neither did I. And I hated myself for it. I hated myself for not protecting you. For not saving you. For a long time, I felt responsible of your death. But never, ever, did I feel hate or anger toward the driver of the vehicule. How could I? She lost everything in that instant too. Her life included. She had paid enough.
But I hadn't. I was still walking, dreaming. Living. And you weren't.
The year following your death was the worst of my life. Every moment I passed without you felt like an agony. But, with time the excruciating pain quieted somehow, even if it never totally faded away. I started to smile without feeling guilty. I even laughed. Little by little, life caught up on it's course. I got over you.
But don't mistake me. I never forgot you. Every moment, shall it be of great joy or of immense sorrow, you were with me, in my hearth.
On my graduation day. At my first job. When I lost that job. When I chose to go back to school. In Muggle studies. What you wanted to do. When I found out this was what I wanted to do with my life. And when I met her.
With whom I am getting married today. And even as I am about to aknowledge I will spend the rest of my life with this woman, I swear I am thinking of you. I want you to know that, one day, we will be back together. Where we belong. But until that day, I will live my life and be happy. Because you didn't get to be.
And as my voice is ringing loud and clear, saying "I do", in my hearth, I am telling you "I love you".
Because even though I, Ted Remus Lupin, promised my body and soul to that woman, my hearth will always be yours, Victoire Weasley.